My Life in the End

by Adriana Alexa

  She was pulling me by the waist and pulled Gary Tyler by the collar, wanting your attention.

  That was it.

  She was with someone else.

  Of course it is, asshole. She is the perfect woman and you think what? She'd be waiting for you single?

  And my son knew the guy ... Moreover, he felt safe around him.

  Sun turned to the elevators with our son on his lap and went upstairs, still escorted by his friend.

  Make no mistake ... not a friend ... They're probably in the same room.

  Elizabeth pushed him away from me and took the hotel. I needed to take her far away to be able to talk to Bishop alone.

  And with or without Gary Gary, I would. This was not done. I could be missing out on a huge disadvantage, but had not given up. I spent the last few days deciding it was not?

  Love it was the easiest thing in the world. It was my favorite task. And I was going to fight for this right.

  Not just here, Gary ... is just beginning.

  Chapter 10

  I could remember the first time I jumped with a parachute in my life. I was humming a Beatles music and the instructor asked me if I was afraid. I wanted to snarl was not. Who did he think he was?

  But I was. I was scared to death.

  My throat was dry. My heart was beating a desperate way like tearing flesh and ribs on the way out. I could not organize a coherent line of reasoning. I had to force my body to inhale and exhale, as if he had forgotten how to do the whole thing alone. My hands were shaking. My whole body was a real carnival absolute decontrol with a soundtrack of the Beatles singsong.

  It had been an amazing experience that I wanted to repeat. But only I came to this conclusion when he was on the floor. When I was safe. Not before.

  Before I was feeling a terrifying uncomfortable pressure that caused me to lose control over me. And I hated losing control.

  That's what he did to me was not it?

  He made me lose control.

  It has always been like that. And watching all my critical situation in perspective, I think I preferred the plane. I preferred the thousands of feet high, the music of the Beatles and the insolent instructor daring to ask if I was afraid. Rather the desperation of dying crushed at the end of a colossal fall of those green eyes staring at me when I was definitely not prepared for that.

  Gareth was doing some stupid magic to Ty. I mentally thanked his effort, though he could not articulate words for it. At least, not here. The coin disappeared and Tyler smiled again as the elevator took us to our floor.

  - I'll teach you this for you to show to their colleagues in the new school.

  - I know how you did. - He smiled.

  - Are you sure? Because this is quite different.

  - I have! - laughed

  Zahner twisted a playful nose.

  - But you need manual skill. You'll have to practice a lot.

  I had to stick the card in the appropriate space on the door a few times and receive red light after red light in response until Gareth decided to help me. I left him to get the card from my hands and opened the door.

  - Tyler! Bath and bed.

  - But mother ...

  - What I told you about that "but mother"?

  - OK. OK.

  He crossed the small anteroom to the room and our bags. I stayed behind with Zahner.

  - I thought you said that we would be away from here Baxter, Zahner! - The lowest grumbled as I could. But it would be difficult to control my voice in the circumstances.

  - I do not know how he found you, Laura.

  - I think it does not matter now.

  - Look ... We knew it was inevitable. - He put his hand on my shoulder in an attempt to calm down and considering the plans of the Interpol agent, suspected that he had not found my meeting with Holt or a little bad. Forcing our proximity should be part of what he planned. - Let's just get on with the plan. You wanted to keep Ty away from it any longer, I know. But now all we can do is focus on the plan.

  - I know what you're doing, you know? - I complained.

  - Oh yes? - He laughed - And what is it?

  - Are you trying to keep me calm so I cooperate. I've done it many times.

  - Cooperated or convince people to cooperate?

  - Convinced. I'm not the type to cooperate and is not funny.

  - Pardon. - Raised a hand smiling - What will you say to him? - Indicated the room with a jaw movement and I knew whom he meant.

  - He does not know the details.

  - It's a smart kid, Dom Why not explain.?

  - It may be smart, but it's just a kid. I will not treat a child as an adult.

  - It's all right. - She stepped back and went out of the room - But ... - watched me warily before adding - What happens if it appears? Eleanor Baxter, I mean. If it appears, and the boy did not know anything?

  I opened my eyes at him, irritated.

  - I hear it has an Interpol agent here to protect my son. - I growled - Or I was wrong?

  - Not in any way.. - Bothered me that he smiled all the time. The situation could be natural for him, but it was not for me. Not even a little.

  - You laugh and I think it's not taking my situation seriously, Zahner. I'm beginning to wonder if I did well trusting you and we just started.

  He laughed even louder, increasing my indignation.

  - I'm laughing because you looked at the woman as if she were taking a piece of it on the bite. I who is beginning to have doubts about our plan, Miss Thoen. I think the lady does not need any help to protect yourself. Or to protect your child.

  - There will calm me praising me, Zahner. I am very skeptical with praise when they come from people who need me for something.

  - And I tell you that before this whole operation end, it will be you who will save me from trouble.

  - That does not make me feel safer.

  - I'm in the next room if you need me. - Winked - Step to see if you are right, later. Baxter will not do anything against you. Neither here nor anywhere, okay?

  - Forgive me if you do not trust you more.

  - I'll find out how he found us.

  - Please. - I hissed sarcastically - not that this will make a difference now.

  I put my hand on the doorknob ready to close the door behind him.

  - Ahm ... Laura? - He came back and petulant smile had left his face.

  - What now?

  - Are you alright?

  Good?

  I had my doubts whether even knew what it meant to be okay. I had to shake my fists to hide the tremor in my hands. My tongue felt like sandpaper in the middle of my mouth and I was sure that security had abandoned my voice.

  - Everything's good. - Smiles false.

  He nodded and with a quick gesture of reverence, is gone.

  ***********

  - You lost your mind?

  - He wanted me to stay home waiting for you betray me with another woman?

  I rubbed his temples trying to organize the absolute chaos of the last few minutes. So many years without it. So many days of anguish. And I could not even say everything I wanted.

  - Elizabeth, I know you lead a life full of very important superficialities. - Sarcastic - I know it's very painful for a self-centered person as you put the needs of another human being in front of her. But try, just for a second, a fucking second, understand that boy is my son. It's my life I'm trying to organize and it can be an insignificant shit to you, but ... - I had to laugh - an important bit for me.

  - I just want the best for you ...

  - Oh, shut up. - I asked, exhausted - You really think I believe that shit?

  - You're being awful again.

  I could yell at her. I could try to make her understand how much she was being selfish and pathetic. But why do I waste my time?

  Elizabeth was Elizabeth problem.

  - I'm glad I'm not your husband, then. - I remembered with a smile.

  - Do not say that!

  - You need to sign t
he papers, you know? You will not be able to escape it forever. You can have the name, Liz. - Laughs - Really, I do not give a damn.

  She gulped.

  - Stay with the last name and we will make a separation agreement that will leave you very well. You will not need to go back to using the money from their parents for anything.

  - Our property regime ...

  - Yeah ... I know Eleanor insisted and I also. I know you always thought it would not take anything in the case of a divorce. And believe me, the document signed would not be the same. But I have no intention to leave you empty-handed, okay?

  She took a deep breath and watched me carefully.

  - Eleanor may have made me a similar proposal. - He explained.

  I bit my lower lip with no intention of dropping it.

  - Can it? And what did she say?

  But I imagined.

  - She also assured me that I would not come out of a divorce with nothing.

  - And for that you have to do what? Miserable life of Laura? Do not let me explain myself? Us away? It is?

  She caught her lips and I held her arms.

  - Elizabeth. - The whisper escaped my lips with an aggressiveness that I did not anticipate - I've always been a well-measured person, but I promise you that my patience is over. Exhausted. Completely. You going to tell me now. Or will you get out of my way. Just my tolerance for these games.

  - Then I'll get out of him, Gregory. - She looked at me determined - now, at least. Because regardless of your tolerance, Eleanor will continue to play. And I'd rather be on her team.

  ***********

  I thought a hot shower would be a good idea.

  Ty had taken to get to sleep and I could only imagine how he would have been frightened by the scene witnessed.

  He did not ask anything.

  I must have been afraid. He chose to ignore.

  But your questions come. And would not take.

  Water squeezed hair, rinsing the shampoo.

  You will kill me drowned? I know you must have a plan.

  So much time had passed, but it was as if I had seen yesterday. As if at the last second I stepped into the shower with him. I washed his body and let it wash over me. I could remember your touch my skin moist, sliding down my curves, lacing his fingers with mine. Saying he loved my groaning, the way I strutted like putting fingers in mouth.

  Ah ... So I think I'll die happy.

  I closed my eyes and realized it was not a memory.

  My mind was tricking me.

  A long time had passed and I hardly remembered more. What was the taste of their saliva? Your sweat? Your skin? Your scolding? What was the sense of touch of your lips on my cheek when he wished me goodnight in the dark? What was the sound of her laughter when I stuck my elbow in his ribs in bed when he asked me if I had slept for the twentieth time?

  I did not remember.

  But I wanted to remember.

  And my damn head was disguising my desire for memories.

  He had held my hand and I wanted to stay there. Part of me wanted to go and protect my puppy of any distress or disappointment. But the other part of me wanted to ... I wanted to leave my hand all night there.

  I overcame Holt. Not over? The idea that he knew everything and had left us was enough to make me move forward and try to forget. He did not want me, it was definitive.

  It was shit, but it was definitive.

  I did not know, Don. Eleanor lied.

  And if it were true?

  How could he not know?

  No doubt the malice of the old wily, Dom.

  As she had deceived him? What was the extent of the lie? I had to have been very good ...

  Or not so much.

  That's why I went away, did not you? Because I knew that she was able to shove their poisonous tentacles on his head and manipulate it as he pleased. That's why I gave up and decided to defend Ty above anything else.

  Was it really so surprising that she had lied to him?

  Eleanor told me everything. Pregnancy, abortion clinic, the disgusting proposal she made him the five million.

  She had changed the facts and designed a new version to tell him. One that kept him away in the dark. The soap was not to blame for my problems, but has been punished yet. I rubbed my skin with strength and hatred.

  The son of a bitch stole my entire life. And yet he covered all the tracks perfectly.

  I wiped the body and wrapped me in the towel.

  The problem was what would happen now.

  Outside help Interpol to shove the dog's cock in a filthy hole, as she deserved ... The problem was what would happen to Gregory.

  Nothing, because he's married, you idiot.

  And because he could have imagined that I was with Gary.

  What could I do? I combed my hair, staring at my reflection. I wanted to not need it. I wanted my stupid heart and incorrigible simply give up and rationalize: help Interpol. Protect Ty. Regain my life and my job.

  But that did not seem enough and I was designing imaginary scenes of what would happen if I just showed up in the lobby of Baxter Inc asking to speak to its president. Three knocks on the door.

  I felt the carpet scraping under my feet as I ran hurried to the peephole. It could be the room service. Zahner or wanting to see how I was. It could be the Pope.

  But I could only think of one person I wanted to be.

  I put my face against the door and saw his nervous hand stuck in blond hair. He had an arm propped against the wall and fatigue posture. I do not know why I was smiling. I forced my lips open moves to make the smile disappear before opening the door just a little.

  - Holt. - I exhaled softly.

  - Dom. - He swallowed hard and I felt her grief - I can enter?

  ***********

  - You'll have to talk down. - Guided in a low voice - Tyler is asleep and it took forever to cool off.

  I passed my hand in her hair again.

  - I'm so sorry, Don did not know that Elizabeth was behind me, if I knew ....

  - Shh ... - he asked with a gesture - Come, but keep your voice down.

  She had a hard expression that told me clearly that the insurmountable barrier of protection that she built around her was steady as ever. She was not going to let the shake whatever it was, which was very bad for me that I could not get over the fact that Laura was wearing only a towel and how much I wanted ...

  Focus, Greg. Not now.

  - Can you wait here? I just need to wear something. - He pointed to the room behind him. It was that supernatural hypnosis again and I could not take her eyes. The long, dark hair, wet from the shower, falling over one shoulder. The towel tied on top of the bust, covering her body to mid-thigh.

  I wish I had spent the last eight years licking those thighs.

  But no ... I spent the last eight years listening to Elizabeth complain that the new curtains friend were more expensive than ours.

  - Greg? - She smiled softly and I realized I should be facing.

  - Oh ... - my jaw dropped, bewildered - All right. I hope.

  She was closing the door behind him and I sat on the couch in the small anteroom.

  Okay ... Easy, now. Just explain everything calmly. A word after another. She'll understand. Just do not panic.

  Don returned a few minutes later, wearing a shirt and trousers of pajamas.

  - Do you mind?

  She pointed to herself and I wondered if she was teasing me. He opened the towel door and asks me if I bother with pajamas?

  - No. - Smiles, discreet.

  What she wanted me to say? "I wish you were not wearing anything?"

  - Want something? - He offered. There was a polite asperity in his words. As if to make explicit what was being polite, but not caring.

  - I am fine. I just want to talk.

  - Right. - Sat in the chair next to the sofa - Talk then.

  I had really come here to talk. To clarify all our misunderstandings and decide what to do from then on. But
it was different ... In theory, I could sit down and explain with elaborate words all the rage I felt Eleanor that she had done what she did. You could even call Boe or Andy and ask them to confirm my version of events. It might be logical, objective, concrete.

  But she was there in front of me.

  I just wanted to hug her and ask if she was okay. Ask what had happened, where she had gone, he had done in recent years.

  If I had missed me ...

  But she had her arms crossed, expressed lips and stare at me.

  Talk then. It was what she had told me.

  - I did not know the whole story. - I thought that part was important - Eleanor said he offered you money as a test to see if you would leave. And then you accepted. I did not know it was a lie it. I did not know anything about Tyler. - You name it melted in my mouth again - I did not know.

  I paused to wait for his reaction.

  - I came here only say this, Holt? Because I had explained to me that part.

  - I wanted to make sure you understand.

  - I'm not deaf. Nor have any cognitive limitations. I understood very well, thank you.

  - Believe me?

  - To believe? - He had wit in his voice and I was sure that she would advocate - Do you think you are entitled to come here and want me to believe something about it? You want me to believe in your character? In his decency? And why would I do that when you never rewarded me kindness?

  - You disappeared!

  - Speak low!

  - I'm not yelling. - I noted indignantly.

  - Lower, then Contact.

  - You gone. He left a letter, a message, a link. Anything. People do not disappear like that! What do you want me to think?

  - That I was not a horrible person. The woman who lived with you, sleeping on your side, I loved you and you said love was not a slut digger. It is too much to ask?

  - I not only say love you.

  - It makes no difference.

  - It matters to me.

  - What difference? Tell me what's the difference? Now? I had our son alone. And the things you said to me the day he was born ...

  It was that horrible feeling in my stomach again. I had made a rough calculation and figured the fateful link could have happened that day, but hearing confirmation even more hurt.

  - I did not know, Don.