The days by his side

by M. C. S

  “Say one more stupid thing and laugh at me again and you’ll see what I’m capable of.”

  “Motel isn’t bullshit…” I shot him with my eyes. “Ok! I’m done. I’m going to confess. I had arranged to meet Fernando today. He gave me the address of his house,” Ben took a piece of paper out of his pocket and gave it to me.

  “What about the search for the dog?”

  “The dog belongs to him. Fernando is ashamed to give it to Carla. It’s a mutt, and Carla is like a designer girl.”

  “She isn’t like this.”

  “But Fernando feels inferior to her.”

  “He shouldn’t. Carla doesn't throw her fortune in anyone's face.”

  “You couldn't understand him. He has a particular way of looking at things,” Ben picked up his cell phone, slid his finger across the screen, and began searching Fernando's name in his extensive agenda. I got closer to observe: Fernando academy. Fernando physiotherapist. Fernando Carla’s.

  “Am I reading this?”

  “If you don't have to change the grade of your glasses yet, I think so,” I shook my head no.

  Ben called Fernando explaining our location. He appeared a few minutes later.

  “Hi, guys!”

  “Hi!” We answered.

  We follow the shy boy to his house. Two boys were playing in the yard, and I could not help noticing the familiarity with Fernando. Suddenly, they stopped playing and started fighting over the ball. They exchanged minor offenses with each other while Fernando tried to stop them.

  “I’m glad I never had brothers,” Ben fired.

  “Sorry for them,” Fernando said bland.

  “Keep calm. I won’t tell anyone,” Ben answered.

  Fernando led us inside. He helped Ben with the chair. We went to the kitchen, and from there to the back of the house. I heard some puppies crying.

  “I found them abandoned a few days ago. I’m making donations.”

  “Donations or do you want to give to a certain girl a gift?” I asked Fernando who answered with a shy smile.

  “Don’t say is mine,” I reached down and took one of the puppies in my hand. I took it to Ben, who refused.

  “Why not?”

  “He'll pee on me. I’m not prepared to defend myself.”

  “Nando, have you arrived?” a girl who looked to be about five years entered the door.

  “No! It's his clone paying a visit,” the girl showed the tongue to Ben, who with his adult way, responded in the same way.

  “Don't mind, Gio. This is Ben. It has some serious problems, but sometimes he can be nice. And that one is Elle. Guys this is my sister, Giovanna,” I answered with a hello. The girl walked over to me and took the puppy from my hand. “She doesn't want to donate!” Fernando said, trying to explain his sister's aggressive attitude.

  “They are all mine!”

  “Not that, honey, I believe Elle has already chosen,” Fernando answered.

  “I can choose another,” I said.

  “No! They’re all mine,” the girl replied, annoyed.

  “How selfish! You look like that Lazy Town kid. These puppies are mine, mine, mine, mine. And even the birdsong,” Ben imitated the singing, I could not help laughing.

  “You're ugly!” Giovanna offended Ben.

  “Girls don't think so. My girlfriend doesn't think so,” Ben said, looking at me, waiting for my confirmation.

  “Ben, are you arguing with a child?” I asked.

  “Your girlfriend is ugly too,” What a wonderful child, in a moment I will have to act in the same way as Benjamin and respond in the same way.

  “Giovanna, enough! We can't have all the puppies. You know it,” the girl bowed her head with tears in her eyes.

  “Next time you call my girlfriend ugly, I won't remember where my wheelchair's brake is.”

  “Enough, Benjamin?” Fernando said him.

  “Now, I think so.”

  Fernando got a cardboard box where we could put the puppy. It was getting late, and I had to get home before my mother.

  “You are going, right?” Ben asked Fernando as we waited for our bus. The boy was holding his bike, he seemed to think about it thoroughly before answering.

  “I’ll do my best.”

  “Don’t worry about driving. I'll come by to pick you up,” Fernando looked puzzled at Ben. - My father will take us.

  “Much better.”

  We said goodbye to Fernando as soon as we spotted our bus. Inside the bus, the looks came in our direction, while the puppy shook and barked from the box.

  I walked with the box in my hand to Benjamin's house. He would be responsible for the puppy until Saturday or the puppy would be responsible for him. Since Carla often came home, I did not want her to arouse suspicion as to why I had a puppy in my house. I said goodbye to the yellow-haired creature mixed with a few shades of brown, and I put it back in the box.

  Ben promised that he would find a safe place in the house for the puppy to stay. He would easily pass through the gate bars, so he would have to stay locked for a few days. I put the box in Benjamin's lap. He held my arm, bringing me closer to him. Glued his lips to mine while I felt him release my arm and his hand go to my waist. I felt a slight pressure on my skin. His kiss was more excited than the previous ones, his hands seemed to touch more strongly in my body. I held his hair while I kept him away from me.

  “Ben, not like that.”

  “I’m sorry, I got carried away,” I looked back, looking for curious looks. I didn’t see anyone. The only creature there was the cub that barked constantly.

  “We have to settle some rules.

  “Rules for what if I haven’t put my hand where I shouldn’t?”

  “Ben, I'm gonna put my hand on your face,” Ben smiled blatantly. “It’s serious.”

  “I know. I didn't do anything too much, Elle. Admit it. I know you liked being kissed that way.”

  “Even if I like it, no crossing lines.”

  “For the moment.”

  “Yo... Yo... You are an idiot.”

  “I'm not saying that to piss you off, or make you uncomfortable, or make you stutter. I just want you to trust me to talk about anything.”

  “Ben, we've been together for a short time, I won't be talking to you about it.”

  “All right. I won’t keep insisting or pressuring you to do anything. I’ll try to be a good boy. Now take the box off me and put it down,” I did. “Now sit down,” I stood in the same place. “I won't grab you by force,” I stayed in the same place. “I'll take this as how angry you are with me,” Ben reached out for me, held me, sat me on his lap. He hugged me fondly. A little reluctant to return the gesture, even though he is not earning it. “I'm an idiot, you already knew that. I just don't want you to hate me when I act like one.”

  “I'll never hate you. That's the way I met you, I have no right to want you to change the way you are. But I ask that you to respect my limitations. I’m no better than anyone, but as I said we’ve been together for a short time. I love you, but that doesn't mean I have to give in so fast.”

  “If I tell you I love you now, will it look like I'm saying this just to make the whole situation more favorable to my side?”

  “It depends on why you want to tell me that.”

  “Because that's what I feel. Because it’s the truth. I love you,” I hugged Ben harder. I placed a kiss on his neck, wondering what would be the difference if he said he loves me and I’m in love with you?

  Benjamin

  Already on the 37th Day

  I wait impatiently for Bernardo to drive the car out of the garage. I did not know Carla had invited him to the party. That meant she had already taken the first step towards forgetting Fernand, which was bad, since I started to create a sympathy for the boy. So I cheered for him. Although Fernando repeated several times that between Carla and him there was only friendship, I still believed that they had been made for each other.

  I wanted to give this story a little push.
But when my hot/hot/serious and smart cousin called me last night telling me that Carla had invited him to her birthday party, I realized that this battle would get harder to win. I know what it is like to have my cousin next to you when there is some girl involved. He has all the basic requirements to win over a girl, and it is not just about beauty.

  I also had the beauty, but I confess that I always spoke bullshit, which led girls to think that my cousin was the best option.

  Poor Fernando! So he suddenly realized he is in love with Carla, just as I realized I was in love with Elle?

  Elle, that girl that has been evolving from: schoolmate to friend, best friend, and now girlfriend.

  To convince myself that I really loved her was the hardest part. People around me saw it first. I was reluctant to accept it. Elle was the girl everyone made fun of at school for two reasons: her glasses were not very attractive, but that did not mean she was an ugly girl. But they had to hate her because she was the daughter of teacher Elizabeth. That was one of the most remarkable reasons.

  Not that I was part of the team that hated her. I take her vision of her father and put it here. I did not love her or hate her. We did not live together. I never made a point of talking to my neighbor. I never thought it necessary. But I knew she was there. I knew she existed. But I never felt the need to get closer, say a good day or a simple hi.

  But Marcos was the opposite, he made a point of making some silly joke about Elle, especially when she passed her head low for us in the schoolyard. I helped him once, but it was only once. I regretted it right after, I thought she was not hurting anyone, so there was no need to hurt her. There was no plausible reason for everyone to be offending her.

  I turned around in the schoolyard with the intention of apologizing. That would be the first day I would talk to Elle if I had not been stopped by Marcos.

  “Are you crazy?” he said, his hand around my arm.

  “I think we exaggerated. The girl never did anything to harm us.”

  “But her mother did. Remember this and stay right here. Take no steps forward,” like a trained puppy I did what Marcos asked me.

  But what if I had started a chat there? Maybe I had not gotten involved with Jessica, so definitely my friendship cycle would have changed? Maybe the accident had not happened. No pain. No helplessness. A smooth and quiet life next to Elle. But deep down I know it would not happen. I would hear all my friends say: But Elle? Yes, I would agree with them. Elle would not have fit in my world back then. But now, seeing my girl at the gate of her house, waiting for me, I realize that today my world would not exist without her.

  I feel a little cold in my stomach suddenly. Is it normal to feel this way when you see the loved one? A silly smile forming. Yeah, I guess the words I love you suddenly came true.

  As soon as Elle gets in the car, I can smell the perfume I love. She puts her backpack next to her and greets Bernardo, then gives me a kiss, so fast I could not even feel her lips on mine. It was Elle being Elle. I am sure she did not want to show any affection with Bernardo present at the same place. He started the car and headed for Carla's house.

  “Carla told you something about me?” Bernardo asked Elle.

  “No.”

  “If she had told you, probably you won’t tell?”

  “Probably not.”

  I reached out to Elle’s hand and I tied it to mine. We went like this until we got to Carla’s house, which was in a luxury condo a little far from our neighborhood.

  A security guard was at the gate, clearing the entrance of the guests after the presentation of the invitation.

  And wow! It was not quite a house; it was a mansion. A grand garden was seen from the entrance. A marble staircase led into the house, the door was grand, and if I knew real gold, I could tell that the small detail of the doorknob was made of it. The colored lights reflected off the white walls. Pink candles were set in pairs on each step. I felt a little embarrassed when Bernardo picked me up and climbed the small stairs with me. Elle took care of bringing the wheelchair, I just hope she brings it all over.

  Elle returned to take the gifts while Bernardo guided my chair among the guests to the party hall. My girlfriend came back and put the box with the living gift in my lap.

  Carla appeared smiling, dressed in a ruffled pink dress, leaving her with a more childish face.

  “Happy birthday!” Elle said, hugging the friend.

  She delivered my gift and Bernardo's. Carla thanked me. She was a little surprised to receive a gold necklace from Bernardo, who soon offered to put it on the girl's neck, who tried to stop him by saying that she was already wearing a necklace, but my cousin never gave up. He managed to convince her to use his gift with a bit of smooth talk.

  “Now mine!” Elle said, taking the box from my lap. The creature made a fuss, moving inside the box and barking.

  “Is it serious?” Carla made a genuinely surprised face. She took the box from Elle, set it on the floor. She took off the cap and caught the puppy in her lap; it was wagging the tail in front of its new friend. “Elle, thanks! You have no idea how happy that made me!”

  “Don't thank Elle. It was Fernando who gave you,” I did not contain myself.

  “Ben!” Elle scolded me with her eyes, as if I really did not have to say that.

  “He wouldn't come, but you can thank him, Monday, at school.”

  “Why didn't he give it to me in person?”

  “You know,” I turned my finger, pointing to the whole place around us. “He feels inferior.”

  “He shouldn't,” Carla said, a little embarrassed.

  “You shouldn’t surrender your friend like that,” Elle said.

  “Because he is my friend I really had to do that.”

  “You shouldn't…” Elle said, and I called her with my finger. She bent down, and I held her cheek, kissing her mouth, not expecting her to return the kiss with so many people around her, but she returned it.

  “Be quiet,” I whispered and kissed her again. I opened my eyes and noticed that Carla and Bernardo were missing. “They ran away,” Elle looked behind and back to me.

  “They must have just gone to find a place to leave the dog.”

  “I didn’t even say goodbye to Toto.”

  “We’ve got all night, Ben, we’ll say goodbye to him later.”

  Elle stood beside Carla while everyone sang Happy Birthday. I could not help noticing how embarrassed my girlfriend was, receiving the glances with her friend. And I was not surprised when the first piece of cake went to Elle. She approached soon after, sitting on my lap. With the plate of cake in hand, she put a piece in my mouth. I liked it when I felt the chocolate flavor spread in my mouth, but I liked even more when I had the opportunity to wipe the corner of Elle's chocolate-dirty mouth with my mouth.

  “Stop trying to sensualize the situation.”

  “I'm not trying,” I said, now finishing wiping her face with my finger.

  “I see. I know you, Benjamin.”

  “I’m not recognizing you, Elle. Your mind is very polluted. But I will only embrace you tonight.”

  Elle had warned me before that she would sleep at Carla’s. Of course, I had already tried to convince her to sleep at my house, which was a difficult battle to win.

  “You already slept there! Forgot? I didn't try anything with you. And look, I was drunk. I could have used that fake excuse.”

  “I trust you, but I don't want to risk my mom catching me leaving your house in the morning.”

  “You don't have to leave in the morning. We could have breakfast together. I could teach you how to play some instruments. Anyway, we could spend all day together.”

  “And my mother would call the police.”

  “Carla can cover us up.”

  “Give up, I'm not going to sleep at your place today. Don't be selfish, today is Carla's.”

  “I’m sure she won’t mind. Carla! “I called the girl, who was saying goodbye to another guest.

  “I don’
t believe you’ll do that. You know she won’t refuse.”

  I ignored Elle's protests and kept calling. Carla motioned for me to wait. It was not difficult to convince her. It was hard to convince Elle to accept. After much effort, she went for it.

  Bernardo left us at home and went to his. I still could not understand why he was so happy.

  Reluctant and still shy, Elle entered my room.

  “Don't worry, Elle. My parents are upstairs. They won’t know that you slept here. Sunday is the day they wake up later,” I tried to reassure her. I watched as she took off her sneakers, sitting on the floor. “I have a large shirt from the school team if you want. It’s of the time I played. It’s much more comfortable.”

  “I'm fine like this.”

  “Are you going to sleep in your pants?”

  “Yes.”

  “Ok then. Are you hungry?”

  “We just arrived from a birthday party.”

  “I’m just trying to smooth over the situation that you’re making awkward.”

  “You’re worthless,” Elle smiled shyly and sat on the bed.

  “Help me,” she looked at me a little confused. - Moving to bed.

  She awkwardly wrapped her arms under mine, with a little effort, helped me to my feet, but could not hold me for long. Elle fell on the bed, and I fell on top of her. I touched her face, sliding my finger up to her mouth.

  “I thought you would fall in less than two seconds, but it was still worth it.”

  “So you planned everything?”

  “All in the most precise detail.”

  “You're worthless, Ben,” she pushed me aside and got up from the bed.

  “To get revenge will you leave me here thrown?”

  “Shut up!” Elle returned, surprising me with a kiss.

  “I knew you wouldn't resist.”

  “It was just a kiss,” she said, running her fingers through my hair. We already talked about it. Why do you insist?

  “I'm sorry, sometimes I have a feeling you're going to slip out of my fingers.”

  “I have that same feeling about you too, but I have my reasons for thinking that. But you have no reason.”