10th Grade

by Joe Weisberg

  Now this is on Wednesday and I still think Renee’s just kidding not joking but just she was doing Spanish but I’m not positive and there’s this voice in me that keeps going “No she really wants to go to New York with you” but she doesn’t say anything again and I’m just playing it cool like “I’m not an idiot” so if she thinks we’re going I can be like “Yeah I know we’re going” and if she never brings it up again for the rest of our lifes I can be like “I never thought you were going to bring it up again.”

  Then on Friday she brings it up again. It’s Friday and we’re standing with everybody and Lenea says something about a classical music concert (SNORE) she’s going to with her parents on Saturday and Renee says “Jeremy’s going to New York with me.” I just sort of smile and nod my head like “Yup. I knew that all along.”

  Then at the end of Friday she says to me “I’ll pick you up at 9:30 I know it’s crazy early but I have to go see my Uncle at 1:00 and I have a lot of errands to do 1st.”

  “OK” I say.

  I get up at 8:30 Saturday morning and shower and put on Old Spice and for clothing I put on a long sleeve button down dark blue shirt of my Dads I got out of his closet the night before and rolled the sleeves up so it was like a short sleeve shirt which John does sometimes but he tucks it in and I had it tucked out. I’m standing in the living room looking out the window when my Mom comes downstairs wearing her robe that she lounges around in on Saturday mornings when I’m not up and says “what are you doing up so early?”

  My Mom in her robe looks like Dawn Of The Dead. 1st of all her hair is flying all over and on top of her face and she just looks like she’s dead.

  “Nothing” I said. “I might be going into the city later.”

  Anyway she never came I waited until about 10:30 and I gave up but I hung around in case she showed up late. I realized it was just a Spanish dialogue thing after all and then when she said to everybody we were going she was making a follow-up joke on that so when I saw them Monday I’d just be like “Hey” and they’d never know I didn’t know. The next morning I’m sound asleep like a baby in my bed when my Mom knocks on the door and I hear “Your friend Renee’s here.” OK if you take the fastest thing you ever saw (for example Beth when the phone rings) and multiply it by 10,000 that’s how fast I got dressed I didn’t even know what was going on I was just like shirt pants socks run downstairs act like you were already ready you just needed a second to get down.

  “Hi” said Renee she was smiling and standing there in a red sweater with a missing V and blue jeans and her face was beautiful underneath her hair which looked short today because it was tied up in back. My Mom was smiling and I said “Later” and we went outside where in front of the house was an old dark red Mustang Convertible I went around the other side and got in.

  “Hey” I said.

  “Good morning Jeremy Reskin (she called me this sometimes).”

  She smiled and we took off.

  “Sweet wheels” I said.

  “It’s my Dads” she said.

  I didn’t say anything about the whole Sabado Domingo thing which was probably my fuck-up anyway.

  We drove through Hutch Falls and then onto the NJ Turnpike the wind was blowing our hair all over the place and the car was so old and classic I felt like I was in a commercial or an old movie about driving. Renee had the radio on WXUF which is totally black people music believe me I wasn’t going to say “Hey lets put on MRQ” but this stuff was actually pretty good for driving Renee was driving pretty straight but once in a while if the music got super funky she started dancing a little with her shoulders and it was pretty sexy and before you knew it the car was going into other lanes and I was like “We’re going to die”. I saw her Tits in profile by the way and then there were no sleeves on her shirt and I could see in her arm hole where there was the strap of her bra which was black and her Tits didn’t move much and she had black sunglasses on and it felt like being in a movie with a very very very sexy movie star.

  It takes an hour and 18 minutes to drive to NY according to my Dad. I’ve driven a few times with my Dad and once with Douglas but I had no idea how to get there because you don’t really get your sense of direction unless you’re driving and I still don’t have my fucking license which sucks but I’ll get it almost as soon as the summer starts. Anyway once we were there I recognized things and when Renee said “Which way is uptown?” I said “That way” and even though I was wrong I knew where I was going. People in New York look at you when you’re in a convertible or maybe when you’re with Renee 1 guy shouted when he was crossing the street and we were at a red light “Get it while you can kid” which I made a face at Renee like “What an idiot” but because he thought I was getting some from Renee I was kind of like “alright”. In fact Renee was stopping at stores and picking stuff up for her Mother and dropping stuff off for her Mother and I kept waiting in the car so we didn’t get towed but I wanted to go in the stores and have more people admiring me there obviously with her. Well we got a parking place near BloomingDales which is a very famous store in New York and so I went in with her and it was really crowded and nobody even saw us but then we went to the 3rd Floor because we were shopping here for a bathing suit and up there in the womens bathing suit dept. I was the only guy anywhere and the women who were all older who worked there did look at us funny and had this sort of “Aren’t they cute” attitude and I definitely didn’t say anything like “No I’ve never actually touched or seen any of those Tits.”

  So Renee keeps looking at these bathing suits and she says “Do you like bikinis or 1 pieces?”

  “Um it depends on what you want” I say “I mean I like bikinis but 1 pieces are cool too.”

  My interpretation of her question is it’s like “Do you like Ice Cream or Milk Shakes?”

  If everybody told the truth I would say: “I like 1 pieces because you get to see more of what you don’t see and then you can imagine the persons overall Tits but I guess I’d have to go with the bikini if God made me choose 1 because of overall being closer to no bikini on at all and seeing all the cleavage and the whole stomach and everything under the Tits and now you can see everything almost just like what it’s really like” and even though Renee was standing right there next to me I started picturing her 1st in the really light red 1 piece she was looking at a second before that was so small on its own I didn’t even see how she’d stretch it over her big Tits and her body and then in the purple bikini she was holding now that was purple on the outside but white inside and the inside part was soft.

  “Hmm” Renee said.

  Then she goes into the dressing room with the purple 1 and I’m like “Uh-Oh” for some reason her being naked in the dressing room there in the store with the carpet and everything seemed even better than seeing her in it on the beach with sand and the sun and water and everything. Probably because I was in the store and I wasn’t on the beach.

  And then I heard some footsteps and she came out of the dressing room and she was wearing nothing but the purple bikini and it was the 1st time I’d really seen actual parts of her. And I felt myself think “Oh Man” and before I could do anything she turned around really fast and went back in the dressing room I was like “Uhhhhhhhh” like I was dying and a minute later she came back out totally dressed and she said “Let’s go.” I said “OK” but she seemed upset and I said “What’s wrong?” “Nothing” she said. I acted like everything was totally cool then she said “I don’t know they’re so, big.” I said “Errunnnuhhh.” Then I woke up. Except I didn’t. Because I wasn’t sleeping. This was all happening. I looked around a little like there was stuff to look at. Then I said “I don’t think people always think the things people think they think.” “What do you mean?” she said. “I don’t know.” When we were walking out I was checking out bikinis like it would give her the bright idea of trying on some more but that didn’t happen.

  We went to her Uncle Arthurs apartment she kept saying he was really co
ol but with a name like Uncle Arthur I pictured some total nerd in glasses. When we got there he did have glasses but he wasn’t a nerd he was about 40 and he wore a kind of bright black Sport Jacket with a shirt and no tie and black shoes that were shiny and he looked weird but in an OK cool way and his apartment was basically the coolest place I’ve ever been there were 2 floors but just 1 big room with a very very very high ceiling (I didn’t know they made ceilings that high) that went all the way to the top and was the ceiling of the 2nd floor too. There were sculptures all over and they were a lot of wood African guys with their wood dicks sticking out and African women with their Tits showing but that’s just how they live in Africa. Renee gave Uncle Arthur a big hug and kiss and said “Hi Uncle Arthur” then she said “this is my friend Jeremy.” “Hi Jeremy” he said. “Hey” I said. “Call me Arthur” he said. “OK” I said.

  He started showing me around and he said “Jeremy are you familiar with African Tribal Art?” “Uncle Arthur is an art dealer” Renee said. “Yeah” I said. “Do you know about the Banana Maloosa?”

  “No” said Arthur.

  “It’s an African Tribal dish. A delicacy.”

  “Hmm” said Uncle Arthur. “Where did you have that?”

  “I made it”.

  “You made it?” said Uncle Arthur. “That’s very impressive how was it?”

  “Pretty bad.”

  We all laughed.

  We all sat down on big white couches.

  “How’s school Babe?” Arthur said to Renee.

  “Oh it’s the same” she said.

  “Do you have a boyfriend?”

  I don’t know how he knew I wasn’t her boyfriend.

  “No” said Renee “but there’s this guy he goes to another school I think he’s cute but we’ve only talked a few times.”

  I was like Wo I didn’t know about that even though I’d so given up and never had any chance in the 1st place with Renee but still I wanted to run over and jump through the big windows and crash through the glass and before I splattered on the ground outside yell “Reneeeeee!” I had no idea who this guy from the other school was.

  “I know the boys are standing in line for you sweetheart but take your time and pick the right 1.”

  “I know” she said.

  “What about you Jeremy?” Uncle Arthur said to me.

  “Schools OK” I said “I’m ready for summer though.”

  “I’ll bet you are” said Arthur who was laughing about it. “What are your plans?”

  “My Dad has this friend who’s a partner at a law firm where they might need a messenger hopefully I’ll do that. We usually go on a family trip too but I’m not sure I’m going this year.”

  “The law firm you’ll be working at is in NY?”

  “Yeah I’ll take the train with my Dad in the morning.”

  “Let me know if you do that I’ll take you to lunch. We’ll give you a little break from carrying packages.”

  “OK” I said.

  Renee smiled at me I’m not sure why but I think because Uncle Arthur was going to take me to lunch.

  Then Uncle Arthur reached down to the coffee table opened a little box and took out a joint! I was like ‘Wo! Holy shit!’ I looked at Renee who didn’t look surprised and then Uncle Arthur lit it and took a puff then he handed it to Renee WHO TOOK IT AND TOOK A PUFF. I really really didn’t know Renee smoked pot I thought she was very uptight about drugs and stuff probably I didn’t think John or any of them were into drugs but here was Renee Shopmaker puffing away AND WITH HER Uncle and she handed me the joint AND

  I took a puff. I didn’t even stop to think about it 1st I just did it and then I’d done it.

  Thank God for watching those other guys smoke Pot enough that I know how to do it and not take a huge puff so I cough my guts out.

  Now there’s 1 other thing about Uncle Arthur which is he’s a flaming Faggot but even though I thought this he was Renees uncle and it was sort of like who cares?

  We hung out and smoked more and then we left. I was just like ‘man this is so fucking weird’ but then I wasn’t anymore and I was just happy to be with Renee and hungry.

  Here’s what it’s like when I’m High: like everything is totally different. And I, Jeremiah Reskin am totally different. It’s pretty cool. I’m also paranoid like if I see a dog walking I think it’s a giant wolf and I think everything’s funny like just me being me makes me laugh and anything anyone says is funny even if it’s not funny and I’m starving for pizza or chips or huge pieces of cardboard if that’s all there is. And Renees Tits are like a holy altar I worship and I don’t even know if she’s busting me or not but sometimes she giggles for no reason and I wonder if it’s why she’s giggling but a lot of times you just giggle for no reason. Anyway I don’t remember what but we eat and we walk around NY and we drink coffee which I drink black and Renee drinks with cream and sugar and now we’re not that High anymore. Then we drive home in the car Renee says “Lenea needs a date for The Prom.”

  Prom is only for Seniors and Juniors but knowing these guys they just go anyway. They have Senior and Junior friends.

  “Yeah?” I say.

  “Uh-huh John’s taking me and she doesn’t want to go with Randy Dan Schmit asked her but she said she already has a date because she doesn’t know him at all.”

  I said “it’s good to go with someone you know.”

  “Who’s Dan Schmit?” I said.

  “He’s that Junior with the thing. You know that saxophone.”

  “Oh” I said.

  “Oh why don’t you ask her?” Renee said.

  “Um I don’t know.”

  “I think she’d go with you.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Uh-huh she likes you. You know as a friend she thinks you’re cute too it’s not that but she’s just so into John.”

  “That must be weird with him taking you and all.”

  “Oh you don’t even know I don’t know what to do about it. I think I should of said “No” to John.”

  “Why? I mean you have to go to Prom.”

  “I know. But I don’t like John like that I should of made him take Lenea.”

  “If he’s not into Lenea he’s not into her.”

  “I agree with you.”

  We just drove for a second. Here’s what I have to say about the NJ Turnpike. We live in a great country called America and our highways and Turnpikes connect 1 part of this great land to all the others.

  “So you should ask her” Renee said.

  “Hmm” I said.

  “She’d definitely say yes.”

  “Hmmm” I said.

  1. To want

  2. Jeremy do you want to go with me to New York

  3. which basically means yes

  4. which I can never remember if it’s Saturday or Sunday but I know it’s 1 of the 2. By the way it’s Saturday.

  CHAPTER 23

  PROM

  Rule #1: get your Drivers License before Prom. I’ve got my Permit but what am I going to do pick her up with my Dad in the back seat? But Randy to the rescue we’ve colonized this area between the soccer field and the parking lot where the bike racks are and we sit there on the racks and the guys hang out sometimes and we’re talking about where we’re taking our dates for dinner and what it’s going to cost and everything and Randy goes “I’m drinking beers at Jeffs” (Jeff is a guy on the baseball team who’s having an all night after-Prom party and Randy and John are friends with him from baseball so we’re basically invited.) John says “Renee likes wine with dinner if they serve us.”

  “You get served when you’re dressed up” I say.

  “Even though they know you’re going to Prom?” John says.

  “Yeah they take pity on you.”

  Anyway the point is they both had their Licenses but they didn’t want to drink and drive which is very responsible so Randy goes “Let’s get a Limo.” John points out that costs a mint and I say we can split it and John says “what’l
l it do stop everywhere everyones going?” and Randy says “Yeah” so we decided to do it. And we decided to meet at Johns in our Tuxs and all the guys will go together except Cindys date unless he wants in on it and then we’ll go get the girls.

  Here’s the conversation trying to get my Dad to cough up the extra $65:

  “Dad we’re going to split a Limo to Prom.”

  “A Limousine isn’t that expensive?”

  “Kind of but not that much.”

  “Can’t your sister drive you?”

  “Are you joking?”

  “Why not?”

  “Dad.”

  “How much is it?”

  “$65.”

  “$65?”

  My Dad likes to repeat things with a question mark.

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ll tell you what I’ll pay 1/2.”

  I was working that summer so I said OK.

  I won’t bore you to death with all the stuff about deciding where to go and Claire sending me back with my 1st Tux to get a 2nd 1 that looked way better and renting the Limo but we all ended up in a long and dark and black Limo the night of Prom except for Cindy whose date didn’t know any of us and picked her up in his car. Lenea when we picked her up 2nd to last looked so beautiful John said “Damn” and Randy said “Yow” even though she was my date and Renee was already in the Limo Lenea looked so beautiful I even forgot for a second I wasn’t in love with her and that Renee was in the car looking extra-beautiful too. Renee had on a black dress that stopped being a dress far from her neck and so showed a little cleavage and then was more like a skirt lower and ended on top of her knees. Leneas dress was totally different it was white and had flowers on it and straps and even though she looked even more totally old and grown-up then usual suddenly at Prom that seemed great she was totally like a woman and her hair that she always had long and straight was kind of curly I guess from curling it and she got in the Limo and sat down next to me and instead of feeling stupid the way I did in my Tux and the way probably John and Randy did in their Tuxs because they’re just Monkey Suits she was like “Hi everybody.” No don’t worry I’m not going to suddenly fall in love with her in the Limo on the way to Prom but I felt like I could definitely be friends with her.