The Space Between

by Michelle L. Teichman

  In response, as if seeing her struggle, Harper slipped her phone back into her pocket and gave her one of her easy smiles. “Let’s go see if we can get the shit scared out of us.”

  Sarah smiled through the tears in her eyes, but held them back. She was just going to have to get used to the idea that being around Harper made her feel good, better than she had ever felt in her life, and that if she didn’t do anything really stupid to mess it up, she could go on feeling this way.

  The skeleton keys worked marvelously, and they bypassed hundreds of people in line at the first haunted house.

  “This is awesome,” Sarah said. She leaned back to see all the people waiting behind them on the other side of the regular line. It was at least an hour wait for those who didn’t have the skeleton key passes. Harper was looking at her with anticipation, and Sarah wondered if she knew what she had signed up for that night. “Do you scare easily?” she asked her.

  “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t like scream in horror movies, but yeah, I get jumpy, I guess.”

  Sarah’s lips curled into a smile. “Just remember that you agreed to come here without any coercing on my part.”

  Harper’s mouth turned up at the sides as well. “I’m sure you’ll protect me if it gets too scary.”

  Before Sarah could respond, Harper’s fingers intertwined with her own. She looked down, then around to see if anyone saw. “What are you doing?” she whispered.

  “It’s okay,” Harper whispered back, and gave her hand an encouraging squeeze. “Look around. Everyone is holding hands.”

  All through the line, there were scores of girls holding hands with their boyfriends, but when she looked closer, she saw that dozens of girls were either linking arms or holding hands with their female friends in anticipation of the scare inside the haunted house. It wouldn’t seem weird for them to hold hands that night. She smiled. It would seem normal.

  “See? I need you to protect me. I heard it’s scary in there.” Harper winked at her, and the butterflies in Sarah’s stomach thrashed around. She never thought that such a simple thing as having her hand held could feel so good. The warmth of Harper’s touch moved all the way through her, and when Harper gave her that easy, sexy smile, her knees buckled.

  It was their turn to enter the haunted house. Harper squeezed her hand tighter as they entered the almost pitch blackness of it, and there was a responding tug around Sarah’s heart.

  “So, we just all go in together?” Harper asked as they shuffled along in the large line they now joined.

  “Yeah.”

  “How’s it supposed to be scary if there’s a hundred of us in here to—” Harper’s question was cut off by her own scream, and Sarah laughed. “Never mind.”

  The Louisiana Scream was incredible that year. The makeup that the actors wore inside the haunted house was sensational, as were the hiding places, and the setting. Harper squeezed her body tight up against Sarah’s, and gripped her hood around her neck with the hand that wasn’t holding tightly onto Sarah’s.

  “Oh my God,” Harper said when they reached the exit. “That was fucking crazy. Did you see those people who were all twisted around the ropes and stuff?” When they’d reached the bayou bridge, there were contortionists splayed along and beneath it, reaching out in their direction.

  “Better than you thought?” Harper’s hand was still firmly in hers. Sarah worried she would pull it away now that they were outside, but she didn’t.

  “That was amazing. Are they all that good?”

  “That’s actually one of the best, but yeah, they’re all pretty good.”

  “I see what you mean about living art. I felt like I was inside a horror movie.”

  “The costumes are pretty amazing, eh?”

  “Uh, yeah, I’m probably going to have nightmares tonight.”

  They continued walking rather aimlessly, and found themselves in a huge patch of fog from the surrounding machines. Around them, zombies shrieked at unsuspecting groups of people, and they laughed when they screamed.

  “Are you having a good time?” Harper asked her.

  “Yeah, are you?”

  “I’m having a great time. Where to next?”

  Sarah stopped to look at the map, then pulled Harper by the hand toward Club Blood. The line was long even for the key holders, and when they went through, it was really small. As they left, one of the vampires screamed at them to get out, and Harper laughed. “That one was good, but pretty quick.”

  “Yeah, I know. Let’s try Bloodshed next.”

  Harper took a moment to adjust her toque while her skeleton key card was being punched at the next haunted house, and to Sarah’s surprise, she took her hand again as soon as she was finished. This section was set up like a barn full of crazy killers, and the actors jumped out of horse stalls and troughs at them. When they reached the midway point, they were called over by an employee because of their skeleton keys and passes.

  They were directed behind a door, into the special skeleton key room. Harper was in front of her, and when she pulled the black drop cloth to the side, the employee there told them to wait behind it until they were called. They were all alone between the door and the drop cloth, and Sarah couldn’t let the moment of privacy pass her by. She’d wanted so badly to hold so much more than Harper’s hand all evening. As Harper waited in front of her, Sarah wrapped her arms around her waist from behind, and pulled her in. Harper sighed into the hug and leaned her head back so that her cheek brushed Sarah’s. She smelled citrusy and clean, and her face was soft as their cheeks slid against each other. Nothing had ever felt as good as holding Harper in that moment. That was until Harper turned, and met her lips for a swift kiss. The curtain was pulled back then, and the employee waved them forward, but Sarah had trouble getting her legs to work again.

  It felt so good to be with Harper. So good that sometimes she forgot that what they were doing was bad, that everything she felt for her was wrong, and that at the end of the day, the person she was slowly giving her heart to belonged to her own brother as far as the rest of the world was concerned.

  * * *

  They visited two more haunted houses before Harper stopped being so afraid of everyone jumping out at her, and started laughing when they chased them through the rooms.

  “Had enough?” Sarah asked as they left the Terror of London.

  “Maybe, that was an awesome one though. I can’t believe they could fit all that inside there. I swear, I thought we were outside when we reached the church. ‘Have you spoken with God today?’” She lowered her voice, mimicking the question the female actor had asked them. Sarah knew why she had said it, but this time the words stopped her. Harper must have noticed her hesitation, because she came around in front of her and softened her voice. “Hey, you okay?”

  “I just realized that I haven’t prayed in a long time.” She lowered her gaze, for some reason embarrassed to be discussing this out loud.

  “How often do you normally?”

  “Every day.”

  “Every day?” The surprise in Harper’s voice was evident. Sarah nodded. “Well, is that such a bad thing? That you haven’t been?”

  Sarah shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean, I guess not.”

  “Come on.” Harper tugged at her coat sleeve. She didn’t reach for Sarah’s hand again. “I’m going to win a giant bear.”

  Harper chose the ring toss booth across the way, and wouldn’t let Sarah pay when she pulled out the five dollar bill that was required for the game.

  “You have to let me pay for something,” Sarah said.

  “You can buy me a Diet Coke after I win that guy.” Harper grinned as she pointed to an enormous stuffed wolf.

  When Harper tossed the first ring, she missed, and it surprised Sarah. Somewhere in her head, she’d decided that Harper was perfect in every way, and the miss threw her off. So did the second, and third. Harper was quick to pull out a twenty dollar bill this time. When the game attendant handed her back
the three rings and took her money, she waved off the change he tried to give her.

  “I’m going to play until I win.”

  The guy running the game, who couldn’t have been more than eighteen, seemed to like her spirit. When Harper leaned over to toss the rings, he seemed to like the rest of her as well.

  “So, do you have a boyfriend here?” he asked her.

  “No.” Harper’s concentration was clearly on the game. She adjusted her stance and closed one eye, setting up her new aim. She threw the first ring and actually hit the bottle, but it bounced off. “Grrr, that was so close,” she said.

  “What’s your name?” the attendant asked. He picked up the fallen rings with ease.

  “Harper.” She lined up her second shot.

  “If you want the big wolf, Harper, I’ll give it to you.”

  Harper stopped and looked at him. She tilted her head to the side. “I don’t want you to give it to me.” She put the rings down. She opened her mouth to say something else, but closed it when he spoke again.

  “Give me five minutes, and I can take a break. We can get to know each other?”

  Sarah flinched. This guy was pretty good looking, and he was hitting on Harper.

  “No thanks.” Harper took a step back.

  “Come on, you said you don’t have a boyfriend here.”

  “That’s because I’m with my girlfriend.”

  The word hit Sarah square in the chest. Before she could process what was happening, Harper’s hand was in hers again, and she was pulling her away from the ring toss booth. She walked quickly, and didn’t slow until they were around the corner and out in a space of open air between the rides and games.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said in a rush.

  Sarah barely heard her over the blood pounding in her ears.

  “I didn’t mean to call you that. I just… I didn’t want to talk to him and I wasn’t thinking before I said it. I know you’re not my…” Harper paused and bit her lip, worry in her eyes. “I know we’re just friends.”

  Sarah tried to force her mind to catch up to her heart. Girlfriend? She’d never really considered the word, not when it came to what the two of them were doing. It was enticing and scary at the same time, but it was the latter that won as she tried to still her heart and steady her breathing.

  “Yeah,” she said in response, “we’re just friends.”

  Harper’s face dropped, and she turned away so quickly that Sarah thought she must have imagined it.

  “I have to go to the washroom.” Harper let go of her hand and hurried toward the restroom signs. Something in Sarah told her that she should not follow her, even though she had to pee. What had just happened? Why was everything with Harper so confusing?

  A woman dressed up as a giant ragdoll screamed behind her and she jumped, cursing the woman. She stomped off to sit on the ledge of the pond. Dozens of mini fountains were lit up with different colours. It was beautiful, and she wished Harper would come back so she could share it with her. Harper was upset now though. She’d wanted to win that big stuffed animal, so maybe something like that would cheer her up. Not too far away, there was a souvenir store. She walked toward it.

  Inside, it didn’t take her long to locate the huge display of stuffed animals. She was even able to find a small replica of the wolf that Harper had been trying to win, only this one was just larger than her hand, and cost just ten dollars. She paid for the wolf and went back to where Harper had left her for the washroom. Harper was standing there, looking around, and Sarah tucked the wolf behind her back.

  “Hey,” she called to her.

  Harper turned at the sound of her voice. “I thought you left.”

  When she reached Harper, there were tears in her eyes, and Sarah’s chest constricted. Why was Harper crying?

  “Did something happen?”

  “Nothing.” She shook her head. “It’s fine. You didn’t leave.”

  “Of course I didn’t leave.” She pulled Harper into a hug, but Harper quickly pulled out of it, clearly not wanting her comfort. She felt stupid for hiding the wolf behind her back, but there wasn’t much she could do about it now.

  “So,” she started tentatively. “I was waiting for you, and this guy called me over, saying he wanted to go home with you.” She pulled the little wolf out from behind her back. When tears started to spill from Harper’s eyes, Sarah’s widened in response. “What’s wrong?” she asked, concerned. “Sorry, I thought you wanted it. It’s the same one you wanted to win over there.” Sarah pointed back with her thumb in the direction of the ring toss booth.

  Harper shook her head, and wiped away the few tears that fell. “I wanted to win it for you, so that you’d have something to remember me by.” She sniffled then let out a forced laugh. “God, could I feel like more of an idiot right now?”

  “Harper, I don’t need anything to remember you by.” She pushed the wolf into her hands. “Now you have something to remember me though. Besides, now I actually got to pay for something.”

  Harper looked at the little wolf then hugged it to her chest. “Thank you.” She wiped her eyes and looked at her. “We should probably get going. It’s almost ten, and I don’t want you to miss your curfew.”

  As Harper walked ahead of her, that invisible tether between them pulled her forward. She followed, the space between their two hearts growing smaller every day.

  CHAPTER 17

  It had been almost a month since their last outing together at Wonderland, and Harper hated that she’d not been able to find the time to see Sarah again. That night had meant a lot to her. More than Sarah could have known when she’d given her that wolf. She had slept with it every night since.

  Her stomach still dropped when she thought of Tyler teasing her about still sleeping with a stuffed animal. The second she’d seen it in his hands, she wanted to rip it away from him, as if his touch somehow tainted it. He’d tried to kiss her that day, but she had pulled out of his grasp, unable to go through with it while Sarah’s wolf was watching them.

  The winter holidays were fast approaching, and she didn’t want to go away for two weeks without getting some alone time with Sarah. It had proven harder to come by than she’d hoped. Whenever she’d managed to shake Bronte and her friends, Sarah was either busy with church engagements, or Tyler squeezed himself in the middle, monopolizing her evenings and weekends whenever he was available, as if she lived to fill his free time. It wasn’t fair. She was being hard on him, but she couldn’t help that he wasn’t the Jamieson she wanted to spend her time with.

  “Do you want to come over after school?” She whispered to Sarah when Mr Epners was writing something on the board, but Sarah didn’t respond. “Hey,” she whispered harshly enough to get her attention.

  “I can’t.” Sarah didn’t even bother to turn her head when she answered, opting instead to copy down the teacher’s notes on osmosis.

  “Why not?”

  “I have homework to do.”

  Harper studied her for a moment. “What’s wrong? You’ve been acting weird all week.”

  Sarah kept her attention focused on the board.

  “Come on…did I do something?”

  Sarah turned to her, and Harper’s relief was quickly replaced with fear. Sarah looked pissed. “When’s the last time you kissed Tyler?”

  Harper’s stomach lurched.

  She knew the last time she had kissed Tyler only too well, and hated the fact that it had been him and not his sister she had kissed last.

  “Well?” Sarah’s voice was caustic.

  Yikes. “I don’t remember.” When Sarah’s gaze met hers, it froze the blood in her veins. That answer clearly was not going to satisfy her. “Last Friday.”

  “On your double date?”

  The words seemed so sinister when Sarah said them. At the time, she felt like she’d practically been forced by Bronte to join her and Todd to see the latest Marvel action movie, and she’d really only let Tyler kiss her so Bronte co
uld see it. She was a little disgusted about the whole thing.

  “Yes,” she answered Sarah, because there was no point in lying about it now.

  “The same day you kissed me in the washroom after school?” Apparently, Sarah was keeping track of their kisses as well as she was. Harper was too stunned to answer. She didn’t have to. “That’s why I can’t come over.”

  Harper lowered her voice. “My family is going away over the holidays, so will you come over after school, please? I want you to be the last person I kiss before I go away.”

  Sarah didn’t answer. She was staring at something near Harper’s hand. Harper followed her gaze, and was mortified that Sarah was looking at a page from her math homework that had somehow slipped into her biology binder. It had Sarah’s name written with a heart around it. She opened her mouth to come up with some crazy explanation, but Sarah beat her to it.

  “Okay, I’ll come after school. I’ll have to walk home with Tyler first and come later though. I’ll say we’re studying for our biology exam.”

  Harper only nodded, not trusting she wouldn’t say something that might change Sarah’s mind again.

  * * *

  There was a knock at the door, and although she raced to answer it, Bronte beat her there.

  “Look who it is,” Bronte said, and Harper skidded to a stop on the hardwood floor. Bronte had never said anything to her about Sarah, but she could tell she wasn’t too keen on her.

  “Hi,” Sarah said as Harper rounded the corner. Bronte was standing with the door open, leaning against the frame, and Sarah was still waiting out in the cold, snowflakes covering her black toque.

  “Bronte,” Harper said from behind her. When her sister turned, there was something akin to loathing in her eyes. She swallowed hard before speaking again. “Can you let Sarah in, please?”

  Bronte looked back at Sarah, then again at Harper. She seemed to be wrestling with some decision before she rolled her eyes and simply walked away. For a moment, Harper was too shocked to respond. Sarah shivered from the doorway, and it brought her back to her senses.