The Fallout

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The Fallout Page 18

by Knox, J. C.


  Seamus steps back and George realises he is smiling. ‘We’ve got a beautiful baby boy, and he’s only got one head,’ he blurts out before bursting into tears.

  ‘Oh, I’m so glad, you had me worried there,’ George said, pulling his friend into a hug.

  ‘Congratulations, maybe this is the start of the good times. Do you think Sarah would mind if I came in?’

  ‘No, not at all come in and meet my son,’ Seamus said, wiping his eyes, unable to keep the goofy grin off his face and the pride from his voice.

  Poking his head through the door George spots Sarah’s bald head looking down at a bundle on her lap, as he steps through the door she looks up and smiles,

  ‘George, come and meet the newest addition to our Blackcliff Island family.’

  Crossing the room, he nods at the Sister as she picks up her bag and leaves before sitting down next to Sarah, gazing in wonder at the perfectly formed pink bundle.

  ‘He’s a cracker,’ he said, placing a kiss on the top of her head. ‘Congratulations to you both, this is amazing, he’s proof that we are surviving.’

  ‘It is, and it’s all thanks to you George, none of us would have survived without you,’ Seamus said, running a finger down the cheek of his son.

  ‘Yeah, Seamus is right, we’re all alive because of you, you taught me how to survive, without you I would have died in Iceland, but I knew what I had to do. We’re some of the last people on earth and this wee man is the future.’

  ‘Where’s Niamh?’ George asks.

  ‘I was just going to get her when I met you at the door,’ Seamus said, laughing ‘Maybe you should disappear, then I can pretend she was first to know,’ he laughs glowing with pride.

  Taking this as his cue to leave, George stands up congratulating them both again, before heading the short distance back to his own tiny mud house. He was exhausted in the hospital but now he’s buzzing and lifts down a bottle of whisky from the top of a bookcase Niamh made for him recently. He knows he has no chance of sleeping; The sun has already risen; It’s going to be a warm day. For the first time since the group arrived in Africa George felt part of something tonight, he’s felt so alone since they arrived here and doesn’t know why, it’s not his friends, they’ve tried to include him in their lives. He has a meaningful job, everyone appreciates having the new school building, the water well that took months to dig and secure, including the tap he added shortly after to make it easier to get the water, along with electricity from wind turbines. None of it matters; He just doesn’t fit here and without Sarah, he doesn’t have the same drive to live anymore.

  He’s surprised an hour later, when several tribesmen come to his hut after hearing the news that the baby was born to tell him that he is required to attend a celebration to bless the baby. The elders are going to perform a ritual to welcome the new baby; because he has been born here, he will officially be included as part of the tribe. Early the following morning the chief, his tribesmen, George, Oscar and Seamus, spend the early hours before the sun rises, painting their faces with war paint. As soon as the sun rises, they are to head out into the Savanna to hunt; the chief explained the hunt is significant in bringing prosperity to the village when a son is born, and the paint is to protect them during the hunt and give courage and strength to the new-born son. George doesn’t know why he, and Oscar have been included but sitting in the dirt having his face covered with the chalky paint he is at peace with himself for the first time since he arrived. Listening to the crickets somewhere in the darkness, and the first birds as they begin their dawn chorus, he’s convinced they are being watched by something in the darkness, but doesn’t feel afraid, the tribe are giving him strength to deal with the unknown. When all the faces are painted, he can barely tell who’s who, until the chief begins a chant, before taking a drag from an enormous pipe, passing it to his left, the pipe passes from man to man until they have all taken a drag. The pipe reaches George, he doesn’t want to offend anyone and takes a drag, he’s never smoked before and begins coughing and choking, everyone laughs, before sitting in silence waiting for the sun.

  It begins slowly at first, but then a stream of light moves quickly across the ground as the sun moves above the horizon until it reaches them. The chief stands indicating they’re ready to set off. Walking single file across the parched ground at a pace that George struggles to keep up with due to his weakened lungs. The group makes good time and is soon at one of the only water holes left since the last rains. They have all been given bow and arrows, George has never used a bow and arrow before and doesn’t expect to get anything, but the tribesmen in their broken French and English insist he will catch something. He’s crouching behind long reeds watching the animals visiting the water hole when there’s a flurry of movement. George watches as one of the tribesmen stand up and aims his arrow, he doesn’t see the exact moment it happened, but there’s a loud splash as the deer falls into the shallow water with an arrow in its neck. There’s a cheer and the hunter steps out and wades through the water to retrieve his prize. George is glad that only one deer was needed for the ritual to be complete; it didn’t sit well with him killing a defenseless creature. The men don’t return to the village after the kill, instead a fire is built, and they watch the hunter fillet the deer ready for eating. The chief said some words George doesn’t understand before the food is served; the meat is delicious; George doesn’t believe he’s had such delicious meat ever.

  ‘Now that was a feast, hats off to the chef,’ Seamus said, when he’d finished, raising a pretend hat to the hunter who seems to understand what is being said and smiles.

  Bellies full, the rest of the day is spent smoking the pipe containing something George doesn’t recognise but makes him hallucinate.

  The last thing George remembers is mind altering euphoria, but now his head is foggy, and someone is shoving him. Blinking open his eyes, he realises that it’s pitch black, he spots Seamus looking as if he’s in the same sorry state he’s in, Oscar is lying curled in a ball on the floor on the other side of him.

  ‘What the fuck happened?’ George asks, lifting himself into a sitting position.

  ‘You men can’t handle your pipe,’ one of the tribesmen said, laughing. ‘But you need to get up, we must head back before the sun rises,’ he continues.

  As Georges eyes adjust to the darkness, he can see that the tribesmen are all standing ready to go; they don’t look affected by the pipe at all. It takes longer than he’d expected for his legs to do what he wants them to and can see Seamus and Oscar are suffering the same fate.

  ‘That was one trippy night,’ George said.

  As they begin walking, he notices that the hunter has packaged the rest of the meat up in leaves, bringing it back for the village.

  ‘Damn straight it was, I don’t know what was in that pipe, but I’d like some more,’ Oscar said laughing.

  ‘And, no hangover, I can’t remember what happened last night, but my head feels grand,’ Seamus said.

  George doesn’t know how far they travelled, but it doesn’t take long before they’re entering the village boundaries.

  ‘Before you leave, we have to say a prayer for the new baby and then the ritual is complete,’ the chief tells them as the men step into a circle around the embers of the fire that was lit before they left.

  Arriving back to his mud house, George is euphoric thinking that all babies should receive the same kind of ritual and welcome into the world. He has struggled to accept his position here in the village but being included with Seamus and Sarah’s baby’s welcome to the world has helped him feel part of something significant. He’s been part of giving the child the best start possible at a time when death and destruction are the only certainties. As he makes himself some local coffee that he still doesn’t like, he wonders whether to ask about being part of the tribe.

  Chapter 26.

  Becoming a Tribe Member.

  It’s been a month since the baby welcoming ritual and this morn
ing George met with the chief, requesting permission to be included in the tribe, during the meeting the pipe was smoked again, and it was agreed that the chief would discuss his proposal with the rest of the tribe. George waited a week after the ritual to allow the euphoria to wear off, but even when things went back to normal, something had changed, it was as if the villagers attitude towards him had softened. People who wouldn’t give him the time of day were suddenly greeting him in the street. Ever since the group arrived in Djibo and he realised most people spoke French; he’d been learning to speak the language to try and integrate better. But as the years passed, and he was continued to be treated like a leper, he stopped bothering and focused only on what he is good at, making renewable energy, that’s how he contributed to the village. But now, ever since the ritual he’s being treated with respect, and he wants to be a significant member of the community, Sarah and Seamus were automatically invited to be part of the tribe when their baby was born. He spoke to Oscar about his desire to join the tribe asking whether he and Lilly are thinking about it, but Oscar said they’d talked about it, but they’re happy as they are. Before the ritual George felt the same, but he’s changed, he has needed a purpose since he arrived here in the village and believes being part of the tribe will give him that purpose.

  It’s a full week before the chief calls for him. George is unusually nervous as he makes his way to the chief’s mud hut. Lifting the animal skin that is the door, he can see it’s laid out for a ritual, the pipe is on the side smoking and the second and third in command are sitting on a rug on the floor.

  ‘George, come in and join us please,’ the chief said, indicating a space on the floor.

  Sitting in the space, he doesn’t know why he feels so nervous as he waits instructions, but everyone is silent just sitting. Five or so minutes pass before the chief addresses him.

  ‘George, you have requested to join the tribe, but we have a conflict and you must tell us why you did what you are accused off?’

  ‘Is this to do with what I did to Sarah?’ George asks looking at each man, whose faces are obscured by the war paint and give nothing away.

  ‘Yes, Sarah has been very vocal about what happened, and you need to answer for your actions, we need to trust that you will put each member of the tribe first, no matter what you feel.’

  ‘Yes, I understand. I can’t justify why I did what I did. I’ve tried to make amends with Sarah, I don’t know what else I can do? She won’t forgive me.’

  The silence is deafening as he waits for a response, before the chief asks,

  ‘Have you spoken to her recently, since she had the baby?’

  ‘No, but she let me see the child, it wasn’t the time to discuss that matter.’

  ‘Well, I suggest, before we can make a decision about whether you can join the tribe, you must make peace with tribe member Sarah, do you understand?’

  ‘Yes chief.’

  ‘You have one week, then we will meet again,’ the chief said, before dismissing George.

  George is walked out of the chief’s hut and all the way to the village center by the third in command, it’s as if they want him as far away as they can get him. He knew it wouldn’t be easy joining the tribe, but gaining Sarah’s forgiveness is going to be near impossible, she hasn’t been able to forgive him since she arrived back to Blackcliff Island, why would she forgive him now? Walking back to the mud hut, his heart weighs heavy in his chest, the one thing keeping him hopeful was the chance to join the tribe but knowing what he must do to even be considered, is going to be near on impossible. Entering the mud house, he lifts the whiskey down, pouring a large glass, he downs it in one before pouring another and does the same. George continues to drink one glass after another until the bottle is empty and he lifts down another, realising he will have to go into the town to restock soon. The whiskey does a good job of tuning down his feelings, but today tuning down is not enough, today he needs to completely block all his feelings especially those concerning Sarah. The thought of seeking Sarah’s forgiveness brings all those awful feelings rushing back, when it was obvious that she was fighting to stay alive. There’s a part of him that wishes she had died in Iceland, then he wouldn’t be the bad person he is. No one would have known any different, she would have been just a drunk who wanted to die, something like he is today. Swigging the whisky, it burns as it slides down the back of his throat, it’s not lost on him that he’s heading in the same direction as Sarah was all those years ago but doesn’t care.

  The following afternoon, George prizes his eyes open to the dimly lit circular room, his mouth dry, sticky with thick saliva, the aching in his skull feels as if the blackest of clouds are hanging over him. Once on his feet the room sways almost causing him to lose balance, he needs the wall to steady himself. Staggering out the door to the hut that is his bathroom and consists of a hole in the floor with a wooden board over the top, normally it doesn’t bother him, but it’s needed emptied for the past week or so, but he hasn’t bothered and the vile smell hits as soon as he enters. A swarm of flies’ buzz around his face as he vomits, his stomach heaving until there’s nothing left but bile. Staggering back to his hut, he slumps on to the stool by the window watching the house where Sarah lives, he’s going to try to talk to her today, but doesn’t expect her to listen. If only he could go back and undo what he did, everything would be so much better, as least he would be able to live with himself even if Sarah doesn’t want to be with him. It takes until early evening and the sun is almost ready to set until George is even remotely fit to talk to Sarah, he wants to take a drink to calm his nerves but knows it won’t help, he’d need a whole bottle for it to have any kind of calming effect. His hands won’t stop shaking and he hasn’t been able to keep any food down, but he knows that he must go now, or he’ll never do it. Stepping outside he walks towards Seamus and Sarah’s house wearing the same clothes he’s had on for the past three days, as he nears the house, he can hear the baby crying and almost doesn’t continue. Stopping for a minute to gather his nerves he walks up to the door and knocks. There’s a slight pause before Seamus answers,

  ‘George, what can we do for you?’ he asks.

  ‘Well… I’m here to speak to Sarah, if that’s okay?’

  ‘Of course, you are family, it’s always okay.’

  George never understands Seamus, they are friends, but it has been a strained relationship over the years, George has often felt he was being mocked by Seamus and today is no different as he follows him into the home he shares with Sarah.

  ‘Sarah! George is here to see you,’ Seamus calls, taking the baby from her when she arrives out of what George assumes is the bedroom.

  ‘Come on outside George where we can get some peace,’ Sarah said, leading him back outside where they can still hear the baby crying.

  Walking away from the house in the cool evening air, George’s heart aches at what he doesn’t have, they stop a short distance from the house and Sarah turns to him

  ‘The chief came to see me yesterday,’ she said, her eyes boring into him.

  ‘What did he say?’

  ‘That you would come to see me soon.’

  ‘Is that it, he didn’t say anything more?’

  ‘You know what he’s like, everything is a cryptic clue, but here you are,’ she said, her eyes questioning him without saying anything.

  ‘The thing is… I’ve asked to join the tribe, but to join I need your forgiveness,’ he said, his heart breaking as he looks at the only face he has ever loved.

  ‘George, I forgave you a long time ago. I was angry and hurt for a long time, but as the years have gone by and I began thinking about all we’ve been through.’

  She lets out a long sigh before continuing, ‘It took me a long time, but I did a lot of thinking and with the help of Shay, I finally understood that you were doing what was best for the group and not just yourself. I imagine, and correct me if I’m wrong, if it was just going to be you and I, you would have dragge
d me to the bunker kicking and screaming?’

  Stunned at what she’d just said, George takes a second before nodding his head, agreeing.

  ‘Yes, if it had been just us, I would have dragged you kicking and screaming, I almost did anyway. But you’re right I was thinking about what it would be like for us all trapped in the bunker and that was selfish of me. I’m so sorry! Sorrier, than you can ever imagine.’

  ‘I know, George, I’m not stupid or blind I see the hurt in your eyes, and it eats me up that I’m the cause of your pain, but things are, the way they are and there’s nothing we can do about it. I was devastated when I realised what you’d done, I can’t even begin to tell you how hard it was to stop drinking, but I knew that I had too, if I was going to stand any chance of surviving. There was a part of me that only wanted to survive to get back at you and it has taken a long time for me to forgive you. I don’t even know when it happened, at one point I swear I was going to shoot you through the eyeballs, but Connor… Well if he was still alive you would need to thank him for your life. I realised that we’ve all done things we’re not proud off in order to survive. And George we have survived, we’re here living our lives, most of the human population has been wiped out but we’ve made it and we all have you to thank for that. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have made it past the first week after the explosion, I would have carried on as normal not knowing my life was in danger.’

  ‘Yes, we’ve survived but at what cost? All the people we’ve lost and the sacrifices we’ve made. I miss Connor, I miss our old life, I miss that we never had another child together, it breaks my heart that Elizabeth died, I miss Blackcliff Island and I want to go home.’ George said, his eyelashes heavy with the tears running down his bearded cheeks. ‘But I know that I can’t, and the only way I can see staying here is by joining the tribe and being part of something.’

 

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