True Colors

by Krysten Lindsay Hager

  “Yeah, the chick with the light blonde hair. What was her name? I think it’s one of those names sort of like a last name… Smith or Harley or something…”

  “I think it was Harley.”

  “Poor Harley. Oh well, off to the movies.”

  ****

  I spent the weekend watching movies and eating junk food. I know Sleeping Beauty falling into a deep sleep was supposed to be tragic, but right now I wouldn’t mind a good coma. Then I wouldn’t have to put up with those jerks giving me dirty looks and talking behind my back. It hurt to see Tori siding with Ericka because she always said I was her real best friend. I kept waiting for Tori to call and say we should make up, but the phone never rang, and I knew it was working because I checked it just in case. Sleeping Beauty had it made.

  Then I realized Cinderella and I had a lot in common. Ericka was like the evil stepmother, and Tori could be both stepsisters because she was so two-faced. Of course, I didn’t have a handsome prince to rescue me. We did have a rodent problem last year, but Mom called an exterminator. I don’t think those mice would have been helpful in whipping up any designer clothing for me anyway. Maybe the modeling contest would make me a big star and I could leave this stupid town and never look back.

  Chapter Three

  I managed to avoid Tori and Ericka on Monday. I even ate one of my mom’s protein bars in the bathroom so I wouldn’t run into them at lunch. I was going to try to talk to them in the bus line, but then I heard Ericka and Tori talking about me. I didn’t hear everything, but I did catch the “ugly jacket” part, the “so stuck up” part, and worst of all, the “I never thought she would have gotten picked in a zillion years” part. I stood in the back of the line and sat with Ashanti when I got on the bus. I didn’t want to start crying in front of Ashanti, so I told her I liked her purse. We started talking about clothes, and we found out we like to shop at the same stores.

  When we got to Ericka’s bus stop, she made a big point of inviting Tori over to her house. The bus pulled up to my stop next, but Ashanti asked me if I wanted to come over so I waited and got off at her stop instead.

  “I always record As the Days Roll On,” she said as we walked into her bedroom. “I’m in love with Bradley McMillan.”

  “I love Troy,” I said. “I’m so glad Savannah left the oxygen tank in the coffin when she buried him alive.”

  “I know, right? Remember the day the tank got messed up and Alfonso almost didn’t dig him out fast enough?” she asked. “I was having an attack. Wanna watch today’s show?”

  “Yeah, I forgot to watch it on Friday,” I said.

  “Troy was in the pool on Friday. You have to see it,” she said, cueing up the program.

  We had a good time watching the show and later, when I got home, I saw Ashanti had added me as a friend on her social media page.

  ****

  The next day, I waited inside for the bus so I wouldn’t have to stand at the bus stop with Tori. Mom looked at my feet as she was leaving and freaked.

  “Sandals? It’s forty-five degrees out. Are you nuts?” she said. “And it’s supposed to rain today, too.”

  Mom went to the front closet and pulled out these ugly little yellow rubber shoes she bought me to wear in bad weather. She jokingly called “rubber duckies,” because they were the exact same color as a bathtub rubber duck. She thought they were cute, and I could keep my feet dry without anyone realizing I was wearing boots. Yeah, except for the fact I was wearing butt-ugly kindergarten booties. I tried to explain to her people were going to expect me to wear better stuff since everybody knew I was going to be a model. I was forced to wear the stupid Hillcrest uniform, but at least my feet could be cute.

  “When you start making money like Talisa Milan then you can wear whatever you want on your feet,” she said.

  Mom made me change my shoes and told me we were going shopping after school for some “sensible shoes.” There’s nothing I hated more than shopping with my mother. She only bought me stuff she liked, even if it made me look four years old. I thought I heard the bus coming so I walked to the bus stop. Tori was there, but so was Devon Abrams, who was trying to pull her gorgeous curly dark hair into a ponytail.

  “Why is the bus always late when it’s cold? We should protest or something,” Devon said.

  Everybody liked Devon because she had a bubbly personality and was a lot of fun. She was also, like, TV pretty. She had huge brown eyes and long curly dark hair. Today she had on a button-down shirt, untucked, with khaki pants, and she looked gorgeous. I was wearing the exact same outfit, and I looked like a rumpled little boy standing next to her. I could understand why she’d be picked to model, but I couldn’t figure out why they had chosen me.

  Ericka’s mom drove up, and Ericka rolled down the window. “Tori, wanna ride?”

  Tori got in and they drove off, while the rest of us stood out in the cold.

  “I wish Ericka had asked me if I wanted a ride so I could have said, ‘No, thanks,’” Devon said.

  With my luck, Ericka would come back tomorrow and give Devon a ride, too. The bus pulled up, but Ashanti was already sitting with someone. I started to ask a seventh grader to move his solar system project, but Devon told me to move to the back with her. She plopped down next to India, and Peyton moved her binder to make room for me. Peyton was trying to get her English homework done, so I let her borrow mine. She had just finished copying it when the bus pulled in front of the school.

  “Thanks, I owe you,” she said. I just shrugged as I shoved my notebook into my bag.

  I hoped it would rain so I wouldn’t have to go outside today. Plus, then my stupid rubber duckies wouldn’t look so dumb. No such luck, but I managed to avoid going outside by offering to help Ms. Ashcroft put together the mid-month folders. We have to get our parents to sign the back of our folders to show they know how we’re doing in our classes. Ericka and Tori always take out any assignment lower than a ninety-five percent before they show it to their parents.

  It didn’t rain until the end of the day, and I was soaked when I got to my bus. I sat behind the bus driver and scrunched down in the seat, hoping no one would see me. Ericka got on the bus and asked if my shoes were made of “designer” rubber. I stared out the window and pretended not to hear her.

  ****

  Later, Mom and I went shopping, and she found a shoe which was fifty-percent rubber and perfect… if there was a flood.

  “Mom, those look like boy shoes. How about these? They’re cute and on sale,” I held up a pair of pretty suede boots. She told me to try them on and asked the salesclerk if they were waterproof. The salesclerk said they were better than bare feet, but they wouldn’t keep my feet dry. Then the salesclerk showed me some ugly clunky things which made my feet look bigger than they already were. I found another pair of boots on sale, and Mom put her hand inside the boot to feel the sole.

  “The sole is like paper. I could spit on it, and it’d soak right through,” she said.

  “Real classy. C’mon, please? I’ll wear two pairs of socks, and I’ll give you some money.” I checked my pockets. “I only have seven dollars, but I’ve got twenty bucks at home.”

  “How much are they?” she asked. I said they were half off, so, “only” thirty-nine dollars and she shook her head.

  “Maybe dad will send me the money for them. He’s always asking if I need anything,” I said, watching her out of the corner of my eye.

  “Try these other ones on,” she said. She handed me some boots with a thick rubber sole which could almost pass for normal boots. She said she’d buy the cute boots for me if I promised to clean my room. I swore I would, and she went to pay. I knew she’d cave in if I brought up Dad. Ever since we moved, she got weird about how much money she made and how much my dad made.

  ****

  The next day I had gym class, which I dreaded, but at least Ericka and Tori weren’t in this class. We had to sit on the bleachers and listen to Coach Daly talk before we could change i
nto our gym clothes. I always tried to sit far away from the popular boys because they can be brutal when they get together. After all, they made Tad Johnston a complete outcast. Tad had never been popular or anything, but the other guys never had a problem with him before. He used to play kickball with the guys at lunch and everything… until Kyle moved here. Tad was always kissing up to the teachers and trying to act all grown up, but nobody was ever mean to him until Kyle showed up.

  I didn’t think Kyle was going to fit in when he first moved here from Boston because he was short and had a weird accent. New kids either became popular right away or they never fit in at all. When Arianna Seymour moved here earlier this year, I was the first person who asked her to eat lunch with us, but since then she has moved on to cooler pastures. Then there was Thalia Zimmer. Thalia seemed to fit in when she came to visit at the beginning of the school year, but no one noticed she was alive once she started going to Hillcrest. People only paid attention to her if she brought in chocolate from her dad’s candy shop.

  Thalia and I always sat on the bleachers during kickball and let people take cuts in front of us. She seemed to be the only person who lied and said they had their period as much as I did in gym. She told me it wasn’t like Coach Daly was going to check. All you had to do was say the word, “cramps,” and he’d let you sit the game out. In gym, we either had to play kickball in class or have a free day, which meant we could do anything we wanted as long as we were moving. However, if Coach Daly was in a bad mood, then he’d make us choose teams and play dodge ball. I was always picked second to last, and Thalia was always chosen last.

  Any animal with half a brain knows it’s best to get out of the way when an object comes flying at you, but I would stand there like a deer in the headlights hoping to get hit. Then I could sit down and wait for the next round of torture. There was this one time when the other team refused to hit me, and I was the last person left standing. I felt so stupid having to run after the balls by myself. I wondered if they did it to make a fool out of me. It was those days when I felt like the biggest loser on the planet. On those days I stayed away from Tad and Thalia so I wouldn’t get lumped in with them.

  ****

  I got to class and found an envelope on my desk. I hoped it was a note from Tori, but it was an invitation to Thalia’s birthday party. I guess she had mentioned it in gym class, but I didn’t realize the party was this Saturday. She was having it at a roller skating rink near the mall, which was weird because who roller skated anymore? And do girls our age hand out invitations to birthday parties? I hadn’t been roller skating since I was eight, but it wasn’t like people were begging me to go to their parties either. I pretended to do my work while I watched Kyle walk over to the pencil sharpener. He goes up there every class period just so he can walk around the room and act cool. His pencils were all little chewed up stubs, but he kept on sharpening. He stopped by Thalia’s desk and asked why he couldn’t come to her party. He could be such a jerk sometimes, but there was still something kinda cute about him. Thalia ignored him and he said, “Oh, you’re so cool, Thalia,” and pushed her desk hard. I pretended not to notice.

  When I got to history, Peyton asked me if I was invited to Thalia’s party. I figured all the girls were invited, but I guess she had only invited a few people. Peyton said Thalia got the idea for the skating theme from reading about Melani Parkington’s retro skating party in a fashion magazine. I was surprised Thalia even read those magazines, but even more surprised to hear Devon, Peyton, and India were all planning to go. I asked Thalia who else she invited to see if Tori and Ericka were going to be there. Thalia said she invited Ericka, but she wasn’t sure if she was coming because she had a basketball game. Things were looking up. The basketball games always lasted forever, and I figured Ericka wouldn’t bother going to the party because she thought Thalia was a “loser.”

  Later, I found out India’s mom was driving Peyton and Devon to the party. I hoped India would ask me to ride with them, but nobody offered. I couldn’t get too excited about the party because all I could think about was walking into the skating rink by myself. Everybody always went to those things in a group. Only losers walked in alone.

  I decided to call India after school and pretend I forgot which questions to do for class. Then I brought up the party. India asked if I was going and I said I wanted to, but I wasn’t sure if my mom could drive me. Unfortunately, she got a call on the other line. India switched back, and she said it was for her mom.

  “We can pick you up on Saturday if you need a ride,” she said.

  Yes, yes, yes. I wouldn’t have to walk in by myself like a loser.

  I stayed up late on Friday worrying about what to wear to the party. I took a quick shower in the morning and got ready while my mother searched the house for wrapping paper and tape. She ended up putting the purse we bought for Thalia in a gift bag my grandma used for my present last Christmas.

  “Mom, it has a bear wearing a Santa outfit on it,” I said.

  “It’s the thought, and we spent a lot on the purse,” Mom said.

  India’s mom pulled up, and Devon’s face lit up when she saw me. She held up her present, which was covered with Hanukah wrapping paper.

  “At least we’ll be losers together,” she said. “Maybe we can pretend we did it on purpose.”

  I hadn’t been on roller skates in forever, but it sorta came back to me. India and Devon requested songs, while Peyton and I skated around the rink. I sat next to Thalia and Peyton when we ate lunch, and I was having a great time until I looked up and saw Ericka standing by the door.

  “Thalia, I thought you said Ericka had a game today,” I said.

  “Yeah, but she was going to come afterward if there was time,” Thalia said as she waved Ericka over. There was only one empty seat, and it was across from me so I couldn’t pretend Ericka wasn’t there. Devon and India got up to go to the bathroom just as Peyton got up to get more pizza. I went to talk to Thalia, but she had her back to me. I glanced across the table, but Ericka wouldn’t even look at me.

  “There was a huge line,” Devon said as she sat back down. “Did we miss dessert?”

  I shook my head, and Thalia’s dad starting passing out cupcakes with blue frosting. I sat there focused on my cupcake while everyone talked around me. I couldn’t wait to get away from Ericka.

  Thalia’s grandma gave us gift bags as we left, and we tore into them in the van. If parties were based on gift bags then this was the best party ever. Most of the time you get some cheap candy, a pencil, and a hair thing from the dollar store, but this bag had a music gift card, a lollipop, a tube of Little Rose lip gloss, some gum, and a glitter pencil.

  “Devon, what color gloss did you get? I got ‘Coral Ya Later’,” Peyton said. Devon had “You Look Mauve-ulous,” India had “Little Bo Pink,” and I had “Jumpin’ Jack Frost.”

  “This party was worth it for the gift bag alone,” India said, turning up the radio. “I love this song.”

  It was the new Havana Carys single, and they all sang along. I felt dumb singing, so I just sat back and listened.

  ****

  Later, I was spreading out all of the stuff I got at the party on my dresser when Mom came in to see if I had her favorite basketball team sweatshirt. I had gotten a huge grape jelly stain on it last week and had hidden it in the back of my closet where she’d never find it.

  “How was the party?” she asked, peering under my bed.

  “Good.”

  Did Thalia like the purse?” she asked.

  “I guess.”

  The phone rang, and I answered it since mom was still underneath my bed.

  “Hey, kiddo,” Dad said. “How’s school going?”

  “I went to a party today,” I said, thinking it wasn’t a good idea to tell him I bombed the last two math quizzes.

  “Did ya have a good time?” he asked.

  “Yeah, I’ll go get Mom.”

  Mom was in a bad mood when she got off the phon
e. I asked if we could order a pizza and she almost took my head off, so I settled for a chicken potpie I found in the freezer. I hoped my dad would call back so they’d make up, but the phone never rang. Why couldn’t my stupid parents get along?

  Chapter Four

  On Monday, I decided to walk to the bus stop after I saw Devon was already waiting there. She was finishing up a protein bar and offered me a bite from the other end. The apple kind makes me gag, but I took a bite just to annoy Tori, who was watching me. Devon wiped the crumbs off her mouth and looked in her backpack for her compact. Tori let her borrow a mirror, and Devon put on the gloss we got at Thalia’s party. Devon handed me the mirror. I hadn’t eaten my lip gloss off, but I made a big deal of reapplying it anyway. Tori snatched the mirror back as the bus drove up.

  In homeroom, Ms. Ashcroft got called down to the office and told us to pair off and quiz each other. Thalia had the bag I gave her hanging on the back of her chair.

  “I’m glad everybody ended up coming to the party. Well, everybody except Arianna. She had to watch her brothers,” Thalia said as she drew a heart with her highlighter. “She said she was babysitting anyway.”

  Mrs. Hearst came in the room to make sure we weren’t hanging from the ceiling while Ms. Ashcroft was on the phone. We pretended to be working as Mrs. Hearst watched us with pursed lips and narrowed eyes. I wondered what Thalia meant by her comment because I thought everybody liked Arianna. Arianna had this beautiful curly strawberry blonde hair. I wondered if she used the highlighting stuff you activate with a hairdryer to make it lighter. People were always trying to do stuff for her. Even Yasmin McCarty, who had been the most popular girl before Arianna moved here, wanted to hang out with Arianna. So Arianna had abandoned Ericka, Tori, and me for Yasmin’s crowd the second they showed any interest in her.