Surrender to Me (I Surrender Trilogy Book 2)

by James, Monica

  I turn my back on him before I slap his disbelieving face.

  “I saw the way you were with him tonight. You still care for him.”

  Groaning, I slide my hands down my face in frustration. Are we seriously having this conversation for like the millionth time!?

  “He's playing you Ava, and you’re totally falling for it,” Jasper says despondently.

  That’s it!

  I spin around, shoving my finger into Jasper’s chest. “He's playing me? Are you fucking serious?! I told him I wasn't returning to Singapore, and that I’m staying here in Los Angeles. And he all but pieced together that the reason for why I’m staying, has in part got to do with you! But now, I'm really freakin’ regretting that decision!” I shout.

  “You're staying here?” he asks, his blue eyes popping out of his head.

  “Yes! I was going to tell you before, but then you went all crazy person,” I say animatedly, throwing my hands up in defeat.

  “I didn't know,” Jasper utters apologetically while taking a step towards me. “I'm sorry Ava. I just... I can't handle seeing him use you.”

  Does he think I am a fool?

  “How is he using me? I told him I didn’t love him, and I’m not going back to Singapore. He asked was it because of you, and of course I told him no. But then he sees us together, and the least I could do is show the guy some compassion, especially after I told him once tonight ends, I am cutting all ties with him. And the reason I made that decision, to never see him again, is because I know it would hurt you if we remained in contact! And I am willing to make that sacrifice for you, because you, you son of a bitch, is all I care about!” I yell breathlessly.

  I am so furious my words are catching in my throat, but I continue my rant. “So forgive me for wanting to do this one thing for him, because after tonight, he and I are done. I was afraid you two would fight, as you are both drunk, so I told him to go home because I don't trust either of you at the moment. That's what friends do! They look after one another!”

  “Yeah, I know,” he replies, slightly annoyed.

  I know he is referring to the time he did the same thing for Indie, and just thinking about her sends me into a fit of fury.

  “Don't you dare bring up that skank! FYI, I saw her and your mom at The Mall together all BFF. If you think Indie will settle with just being friends, then you're the one who is being played!”

  I am shouting my lungs out, but this conversation is one well overdue, and now that I’ve started, I can’t stop.

  I can see he is clearly shocked that Indie and his mom are in touch.

  “When did you see them together?”

  Are you kidding me? That’s all he has to say!

  “I don't know!” I spit. “That's beside the point. At least after today, Harper will be out of my life for good, living in a different country. But you can't say the same thing for Indie, or Harmony, or even Trudy for that matter, or whoever else you have salivating all over you! It’s like, ‘Here Ava, take a number to Jasper’s heart! You’re girl number five hundred fighting for his affections!’”

  I am so mad, I am seeing red!

  Jasper fists both hands through his hair, and throws them by his sides. “What do you want me to do? If you want Indie out of my life, fine, consider it done! If you want me to talk to my mom and tell her to never see Indie ever again, fine! You want me to stop talking to Harmony, fine! You want me to stop talking to every girl I have ever met, or will meet, fine! Ava fine! I will do all of that because I fucking love you!”

  He grabs my palm and slaps it against his chest. “You feel that?”

  Suddenly flinching, as the sound my hand creates against his torso echoes, and carries on the night’s cool breeze.

  I slowly bob my head up and down. “Yes,” I reply, as I can feel his heart beating like a thousand butterflies have taken flight in his chest.

  He covers his hand over mine and his eyes search my face, willing me to believe him. “My heart is yours. It beats for no one but you. Do you hear me? Only you.”

  I bite back my tears because the emotion behind his words is pure.

  “But you’re naive if you think for one minute we've seen the last of Harper,” he snarls, dropping his hand from mine, and balling them up into fists by his side.

  Way to go Jasper and ruin a moment.

  I am pissed off that he thinks I am naive, because I believe Harper will leave me be.

  “He will do as I ask,” I reply angrily.

  Jasper lets out a small snicker. “How can you believe a slimeball like him? Why do you give him credit Ava? Why?!”

  He is looking at me, pleading with me to explain everything.

  This is it. He wants to know everything. Then I will tell him everything.

  “Because he was there when you weren't! He was the one who helped me pick up the pieces when you left. He was the one who hugged me to sleep every night. He was the one who made sure I ate and showered and remembered how to breathe when you didn’t. And he was the one who never left me that fucking note!”

  Jasper takes a step back as I have come up into his private space, shoving him in his chest.

  “What note?” he asks, lightly grabbing onto my wrists to stop me from pounding into him.

  “Oh please, don't insult me,” I snicker, trying to pull out of his hold. “The note you sent me. The note that stopped me from begging you to take me back! The note that made me say yes to Harper!”

  Jasper grabs me by my upper arms, shaking me lightly, because I am hysterical.

  “Ava,” he says in a hushed tone, trying to calm me down. “What note?” he asks again, peering into my eyes.

  Choking on my rapid breaths, my whole body is shaking with each raspy breath I take. I can’t speak so I reach into my bag, searching frantically for the malevolent note, and throw it at him when I find it.

  Jasper picks it up from the ground and unfolds it, and as his eyes rake over the words, they change from cerulean to crimson.

  “I didn't write it,” he says through clenched teeth, shaking his head.

  “You didn’t?” I ask disbelieving. “It's your handwriting!” I yell, jabbing my finger into the piece of paper repeatedly.

  A look of pure rage takes over his features and I stop jabbing, afraid of his response.

  “Who gave this to you?” he asks, showing me the note, his chest rising quickly.

  Lowering my eyes because I suddenly feel sick, I know that something is not right. I know that Jasper was not the one who wrote the note.

  “Who gave this to you Ava?” he repeats, grasping my upper arms, shaking me lightly.

  “Harper,” I whisper, my eyes still lowered.

  Jasper lets me go and drops to his knees with a bone crunching thud. With his head buried in his hands, his shoulders are shaking uncontrollably, and he is breathing violently.

  Then it all clicks into place, and time freezes. I think back to when Harper gave me the note and how smug he looked, smiling like the Cheshire Cat. How he never looked too surprised when I finally said yes.

  I can't believe this. All this time it was... him. How could Harper do this to me? Jasper never wanted me to forget him. It was Harper all along.

  I feel sick.

  Jasper jumps to his feet, and cries a bloodcurdling scream with his face raised to the sky.

  “Motherfucker!!”

  Before I know what is going on, he is storming off down the driveway.

  Quickly chasing after him, while tripping over my feet, I shriek, “What are you doing?”

  But there is no need to ask him, because I know where he is headed.

  He doesn’t answer, but continues storming down the driveway.

  “Jasper, no. Please don’t,” I plead, grabbing his arm.

  I am so afraid, because right now there is no stopping Jasper. He hauls me down the driveway with him, the gravel dragging under my heels. Finally he stops as I am latching on like a leech, and not letting go.

  He
shrugs out of my grip and turns to face me. At last, he has come to his senses.

  “Tell me where he’s staying!”

  Or not.

  He is so mad I can see a little vein pulsating under his left eye, and there is no way I am going to tell him where Harper is.

  “No.” I shake my head swiftly.

  I can't tell him because I know Jasper will kill Harper.

  He continues stomping down the driveway, with me following in hot pursuit.

  “I will find him whether you tell me or not!” he says kicking at the gravel, turning around to face me, fisting his hair in frustration.

  “Jasper!” I plead, hoping he will calm down and see reason.

  But he ignores me and bolts down the driveway. I try to keep up with him, but know my chances of catching him are nil, especially in heels.

  “Jasper!” I yell one last time desperately.

  But he doesn’t turn around, and before I know it, his silhouette disappears.

  Seeing as the last sight of him was him cracking his neck from side to side, and clenching his fists like Rocky, I do the only thing I can.

  I race over to Roberto and dive into the passenger seat.

  Roberto looks at me, the newspaper strewn over the steering wheel.

  “Miss?” he asks confused.

  I halt all questions with my palm facing him.

  “Take me to Harper. Now!”

  Chapter 26

  Love Hurts

  I have given Roberto strict orders to step on it.

  I shouldn't find it ironic that I am blessing the Gods for Harper’s choice in this speed machine, because everything about this whole situation is ironic. It’s ironic that I am actually happy to be in this car, driving like a bat of hell down the freeway. It’s ironic that I am actually happy to be four blocks away from The Four Seasons, the place I usually avoided like the plague. And it’s ironic that I am actually happy to find Harper so I can slap his lying, deceitful face!

  How could Harper lie to me? This whole time he made me believe that Jasper had written me that awful note. I gasp, because that would mean he knew Jasper existed all along. But how did he know, and how did he forge his writing so well? I need answers and I need them now.

  Running into The Four Seasons even before Roberto has put the car in park, I charge through the front revolving doors, and rip off my shoes as they are slowing me down.

  “Miss? Miss?” I vaguely hear the desk staff call after me as I tear through the fancy foyer with no intention of stopping.

  Unable to use the lift without a swipe card, I’ll be damned if that stops me as I yank open the door to the stairwell, and fly up them, two at a time.

  My lungs are burning and I have a stitch, but I don't stop till I get to the sixteenth floor, which is where I want to be. I don't know how long I've got until Jasper is bursting down the door. But before that happens, I need to find out what the fuck is going on, because I have a feeling, not a great deal of talking will be happening when the wrath of Jasper rolls in.

  I run down the red carpeted hallway to the room that offered me no comfort while I was here. My bare feet are slapping loudly on the floor, and as I approach the room, puffing frantically, I stop dead in my tracks. The door is wide open, like Harper is expecting me, so I storm through, and don’t need to look too far to find the devil.

  Harper is leaning against the desk with his ankles crossed, loosely holding a brandy glass. The look in his evil blue eyes sends a shiver down my spine.

  “I was expecting you,” he says smugly, taking a swig of his drink.

  “How could you!” I spit, storming over to him, my fists clenched by my sides.

  He looks so calm and has the nerve to smile self-righteously, before addressing me. “How could I what? I gave you everything you ungrateful whore.”

  Whoa, what? His words feel like a slap.

  “What?” I ask stunned.

  “Oh Ava,” he tsks. “Have you not worked it out yet? Although it doesn’t surprise me. You were never that bright.”

  I stare astonished and speechless because yes, Harper is a lying asshole, but now he is being down right cruel with his name calling.

  Harper continues casually. “You are pathetic. Your ideals and notions on love are really ridiculous. Oh your little speech tonight was quite humorous... ‘You'll find a girl who will treat you right, and love all the ridiculously expensive gifts you spoil her with,’” he says, mocking me in a voice which I am assuming is meant to sound like me.

  Not believing what I’m hearing, my mouth drops open and I start shaking uncontrollably, because I know the worst is yet to come.

  Jasper’s words replay in mind and I sneer, “You played me.”

  “Ding ding ding!” Harper yells, pushing back off the desk, stalking towards me.

  “I really deserve an Oscar after my performance this evening, and not to mention the whole break up scenario and my crocodile tears. I can’t believe you actually fell for it.”

  “But you...” I stutter, walking away from him.

  “But I what, Ava?” Harper asks, narrowing his eyes.

  “Why?” I ask softly.

  I need answers and I need them before I throw up on this expensive cashmere rug.

  “Oh, do I really have to spell it out for you?”

  I stare at him, non-responsive. I can’t move a muscle, let alone string together a sentence.

  “You Ava, are a mindless twit. I needed someone like you to be the perfect trophy wife. Be on my arm, look pretty and do exactly as I say. Wear what I tell you. Eat what I tell you. Behave like I tell you. Fuck like I tell you,” he sneers licking his top teeth. “Although that last part was not necessary as I was getting my needs met elsewhere.”

  My mouth pops open further, as I am unsure of which part of his speech has wounded me more.

  “Yes darling, all those times I was out on “business,” I was fucking someone’s brains out. Surely you knew that something was off when you weren’t fulfilling your role in the bedroom, and I didn’t question you.”

  Covering my mouth with both hands in absolute shock, I question, who is this person standing before me?

  “No?” he asks without feeling.

  Closing my eyes and shaking my head, I scrunch my eyes tight because I will not allow myself to cry.

  Harper lets out a cold laugh. “Well as they say, all beauty no brains. I think that describes you perfectly.”

  I snap open my eyes as there is something I need to know.

  “Even when we were first together? You...cheated on me?” I ask, my voice a mere whisper.

  I need to know if he has always been an asshole, and if I have always been so blinded by his bullshit.

  Harper places his finger against his wicked mouth in contemplation. “Gee, let me think.”

  Oh my God, I feel sick. Clutching my stomach, afraid I am about to lose what little dinner I ate, I can’t believe I have been so stupid. I wasted so many tears over this lying son of a bitch, and then I realize I never knew the real Harper. I got a glimpse of the real Harper, and he was the one who broke up with me so callously in that karaoke bar.

  “Did you ever love me?” I ask.

  Harper shrugs. “Not really. What’s to love? You’re a snivelling romantic with unrealistic views of the world. I was doing you a favor by asking you to marry me.”

  The room is closing in on me as I ask, “Why did you propose to me? I don't understand. I mean if you never loved me, why would you want to marry me? I could have been your puppet without the whole marriage facade. You told your parents for Christ’s sake!”

  I look at Harper and see the real him for the first time. And it’s an ugly, ugly sight.

  “Ava, to get what I want, I have always told my parents what they want to hear, and marrying you is exactly what they wanted. They stopped my allowance as soon as I dumped your whiny ass. And I couldn’t be having that. So I touched base with you by sending that pathetic I miss you email, and I knew you
would fall for it. I needed you back in my life Ava, and my mom wouldn’t settle for anything less than marriage. Hence, the proposal. My parents get the perfect boring little daughter in law, who they can brag to their friends about, and I continue getting my inheritance. Everyone wins,” he says, clapping his hands together loudly.

  Then he curls up his lip and scowls. “But now you've gone and fucked everything up.”

  He is thankfully standing a few feet away from me with his arms crossed. I don’t want him anywhere near me because I know if he was, I would be in his face, pulling his hair out and kicking him in the balls.

  It’s all starting to make sense now. Harper believed if we looked happy on the outside, others would believe our sham. He used me. All the times he was kind to me, it was for his own personal gain. This isn’t just about what he did with Jasper and forging that note, this is about so much more.

  He really is a sociopath!

  “You used me,” I say horrified.

  “Oh please, no more than you used me,” he scoffs, glaring at me.

  I flinch because I know he is referring to accepting his proposal when I shouldn’t have.

  Harper takes a small step towards me, and I ball up my hands behind my back, terrified of how close he is.

  “We both used each other. But you’re past your expiration date, and I am sick of looking at your pointy face. Get out.”

  How can he be referring to me so cheaply, like something that can be thrown away? I stand my ground, as I am not going anywhere until I find out how he knew about Jasper.

  Harper notices my stance and chuckles. “It's a shame really, as you were shaping out to be the perfect pawn. There was of course, one problem.”

  Jasper.

  “How did you know he existed?” I ask, hopeful he will continue with the sharing so I can get the hell away from him.

  “Think Ava,” Harper mocks, stepping into my face.

  Recoiling, as I want him nowhere near me, I pull away disgusted because his whiskey scented breath is rancid. No matter how hard I think, I come up empty. How did he know about Jasper?