Santa's Secret

by Heidi McLaughlin

  He takes a deep breath in and exhales slowly. “I don’t know if I have any. I think that once you have a child, anything you wish you had done differently goes out the window because of the love you feel for them. What about you?”

  “I would’ve told Dom to leave us alone.”

  “Laney…”

  “No, just listen, Fish. For a long time, I always wondered if I missed my opportunity at my happily ever after. Hollywood is rough on life, love, and happiness, but I always thought I’d keep the small town girl with me even out there, and find my one and only. But it wasn’t until you pulled me over that day and I looked into your eyes that I finally felt like I was home again. I know neither of us is in any place to be more than friends, but I do wonder if I had made different choices, how life would’ve been.”

  Aiden doesn’t respond with words but does with the most fantastic gesture possible. He clasps his hand with mine and leans into me.

  Twenty

  Aiden

  “What the…” My heart begins to beat rapidly as I look around. Every light is on and someone is going on about Santa bringing them a gift for Christmas. It takes me a minute to recognize the voice is coming from the radio. I’m also sweating and feel like I’m being trapped by something. That something is Delaney. She’s resting against my side with her arm draped over my stomach, sleeping soundly despite the lights and noise. I suppose, in her line of work, you learn to sleep through anything.

  Rubbing my hand over my face, I tap Delaney on her shoulder, trying to rouse her. I don’t know what time we fell asleep or how she ended up next to me, but she is. Her lips purse into a little pout and her eyes flutter. I wonder if she’s dreaming about being home in California or if Ramona Falls is invading her subconscious. Laney hasn’t been home long but she’s already had an impact on everyone around her. When she leaves to go back, people here will be torn. Holly will be devastated. After all, she’s already attached to Delaney.

  Holly isn’t the only one.

  Speaking of my daughter, she’s at the end of the couch, with her legs resting on Delaney’s. By the look of us, you’d wonder how any of us slept at all. I reach out and touch Holly’s toes, but she doesn’t budge either. We’re a heaping pile of arms, legs and torsos on a couch meant for sitting, At a push, one person could sleep here, but it wouldn’t be comfortable. I should know since my back is screaming in pain and my neck has a kink in it. I’m afraid to move out of fear I might pull a muscle.

  Delaney mumbles incoherently but doesn’t stir. It would be so easy to close my eyes and fall asleep with her but there’s no way I can, not with the power back on. Carefully, I slide out from under her. The burning embers left over from the fire are still red and glowing. Using the poker, I spread them out, hoping to extinguish them before it’s time to leave for church. Although, missing today might be a good idea. It’s only going to take a matter of minutes for word to spread that Delaney spent the night. I wish her being here wasn’t such a big deal to people, but small town lives need gossip to survive.

  The plow truck thunders by, causing the front window to rattle. “Some day,” I mutter, knowing the day will come when I can fix up this place.

  “Some day, what?” Delaney asks from behind me. I look at her from over my shoulder. Her hair is a mess, matted to her face, and she has raccoon eyes.

  “Some day, we’re going to look back on this moment and realize—”

  “Realize what?” she asks, stepping forward. Her hand rest on my forearm and the feel of her skin on mine causes a tingling sensation I haven’t felt in years. Not since I first met Heather, and definitely not since Delaney and I dated. As coyly as possible, I drop my arm, not wanting to send the wrong message to Delaney. I like her, but we’re too different.

  “You’re going to realize you let your guard down and your number one fan is going to see what you look like in the morning.” I raise my eyebrows and try to smile while holding back a laugh. Her eyes go wide and she covers her face before letting out a groan. “Bathroom is first door on the right.”

  Delaney goes running; however it strikes me as odd she hadn’t asked where it was before. I could say we were caught up in the moment, but I don’t think that’s the case. I cover the embers as much as I can before heading into the kitchen to make coffee. Looking through the window as I fill the pot, the snow glistens off the rising sun. This is when I love the covered ground. It’s pristine and looks like a million crystals have fallen from the sky. Of course, out front will look gray and dirty by the end of the morning once cars are on the road, and yards becomes a trampled ice rink after everyone heads out to play and to build snowmen, igloos and battle walls for their snowball fights.

  “I can’t believe… hey, what’re you doing?” I jump at the sound of Delany’s voice and shut the water off, having to pour out the overflow.

  “I spaced out.” Setting the coffee pot down, I reach for a towel, only to have Delaney take over the coffee making. “I can do that,” I tell her, but it’s too late. She’s already scooping coffee grounds into a fresh liner.

  “You need a Keurig.”

  I nod. “I need a lot of things, but a fancy one cup coffee maker isn’t one of them.”

  “Well maybe Santa will bring you one,” she says, resting her hip against the counter. Looking at her, seeing her without her normal make-up, she looks nothing like the woman you see on the screen. Delaney’s eyes somehow shimmer under the dull lighting in my kitchen. The pull I feel is magnetic, and I find myself stepping closer to her. My brain is screaming, telling me to stop, to step back and face reality. The reality being she doesn’t live here. She’ll be leaving eventually. We’re not in the same league. My heart and my body control every action, every feeling right down to my pounding heart, sweaty palms and parched mouth.

  My hand reaches out and cups her cheek. Her eyes close and her head tilts upward. I lick my lips in anticipation, leaving my mouth open for what surely will be a life-changing kiss. My eyes drift shut and the small gasp I hear from her pushes me forward. The air we breathe is the same, it’s shared, and for the first time since my wife passed, I want to kiss another woman. I want to love her, cherish her and find every possible excuse to be with her, and yet I haven’t even kissed her yet.

  “Daddy?”

  I jerk away from Delaney and she turns toward the coffee pot. I shake away the fairytale daydream I was having and go back to the living room where Holly is. Her hair, although blonde, matches the same state Delaney’s was in not moments ago.

  Clearing my throat and my thoughts, I push Holly’s hair out of her face and look into her blue eyes. “Good morning. It’s still early, do you want to go back to bed?”

  She shakes her head. “Where’s Laney?” she asks, tiredly. I want to correct her and tell her I’m the only one allowed to refer to Delaney that way, but I don’t. It’s not my place.

  “I’m here, but I’m about to leave. I need to head home.”

  “But what about church?” Holly asks her.

  Delaney and I make eye contact, but I can only hold it for a second. Delaney goes to Holly and pulls her into a hug. “I’ll have to see what Calvin wants to do. I sort of left him with my brother yesterday.”

  “Daddy says Dominic is a royal pain—”

  I cut Holly off before she can repeat what I’ve said about Dom, although it’s nothing Delaney doesn’t already know. “Okay, say goodbye to Delaney and tell her you’ll see her…”

  “At school,” Delaney says.

  “Okay,” Holly whines. Believe me, kid. I get it.

  “Holly, go change your clothes. I’m going to go clean off Delaney’s car for her.”

  “Oh, I can do it.” Delaney’s hand touches my forearm and the sensation I felt earlier is back, but more powerful. The urge to pull her into my arms and to kiss her senseless is pressing.

  “Don’t be silly,” I tell her. “I’ll take care of it for you.”

  “That means you can help me get dressed!” Holly w
astes no time reaching for Delaney’s hand and tugs her down the hall. I half expect Delaney to look at me from over her shoulder and plead for help, but she doesn’t, and I like that even though I shouldn’t. But she does yell, “Keys are in my coat,” as she continues down the hall. What happened or was about to happen in the kitchen should’ve never even come close. Kissing complicates friendships, and right now that’s the only thing we can be.

  By the time Delaney emerges from the house, her car is warming up, it’s clear of snow and I’m about done blowing the snow from the driveway. She takes one look and starts laughing uncontrollably. “What’s wrong?” I ask, shutting off the machine.

  “You’re covered in snow. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’re a yeti.”

  I glance down at myself and nod. “I suppose I could’ve left the two feet of snow here and watched you back out.” I raise my eyebrows, challenging her.

  “You wouldn’t do that.” Delaney steps closer, placing her hands on the side of my snow covered jacket. Her head tilts back, leaving the pathway to her lips wide open. Kissing her will lead to heartache, and apparently, something my body doesn’t care about because I’m moving closer.

  “Hi, Mr. Fisher.” Delaney turns away quickly. I step in front of her, blocking her from whoever is at the end of my driveway. From here, I can’t make out their face, but that doesn’t stop me from waving. “Will we see you at church?”

  “Sure will,” I say to the woman I’m assuming is my neighbor. I wait until she’s past the snow bank, wondering what she’s doing out this early and walking the streets.

  “I should go,” Delaney says as she opens the car door. Turning around, I grip the door, holding it open for her. I’m tempted to ask her if she’s okay, but we both know what’s coming. Whether my neighbor saw it was Delaney I was about to kiss or not, rumors will be rampant this morning because some mystery woman spent the night at my house.

  “I’ll see you later?” My statement comes out more like a question. I know I’ll see her, I guess I want to know when.

  “At church,” she tells me, pulling the door shut and switching her car into reverse. I wait until she’s on the road before I head back into the house. My discarded snowsuit hangs in the mudroom where it can dry before I have to put it on again. Inside, Holly is sitting at the table, finishing a bowl of cereal.

  “Good girl, making your breakfast.”

  “I didn’t,” she says with a shrug. “Laney did.”

  “Did she do your hair as well?”

  Holly turns to show me the French braid, which starts on one side of her head and finishes on the other. It’s not a good feeling, knowing I’ll never be able to do something like that for her. Maybe, what I’m feeling is a sign I’m ready to move on, that Holly needs a mother. Someone who can do her hair, teach her how to put her make-up on and tell girly secrets to.

  While Holly continues eating breakfast, I shower and get dressed quickly. The benefit to having short hair is I don’t have to do anything with it. The downfall, my head freezes in the winter and I need to wear a stocking cap or toque every time I have to leave the house. Brain freeze is a real thing and doesn’t just happen when you eat ice cream too fast.

  The church parking lot is full when we pull in. In fact, I can’t remember a time when there’s been so many cars. I help Holly out of the truck and when she sees my parents, she goes running. My sister stalks toward me with an angry scowl on her face. As soon as I see her hand rear back, I know she’s going to hit me. I’m prepared though and step out of the way.

  “I can’t believe you.”

  “What?” I ask her, completely unaware of what her problem is.

  “Shelby. You’ve broken her heart. I thought you were a better man than this, Aiden.”

  Shelby? Did I make plans with her and forget? I don’t think I did, but I could be wrong. “It started snowing. I’ll make it up to her.”

  “What?” Meredith asks.

  “What, what?”

  “You seriously have no idea what I’m talking about, do you?” She crosses her arms over her chest and huffs. I shake my head slowly, unwilling to open my mouth out of fear I’ll say something wrong. Meredith’s hands flail about and she groans. “You spent the night with Delaney Du Luca. Everyone knows about it. People saw you making out this morning. Shelby is heartbroken, Aiden. She really likes you.”

  I hold my hands up. “First of all, Delaney spent the night because it started snowing and we had a power outage. She brought a tree stand over from Mr. Steve’s and ended up helping Holly and I decorate. Second, Delaney and I weren’t making out. Third, what I do in my home is my business and fourth, I never led Shelby to believe we were any more than friends.”

  “Hey, Aiden.” The voice of Shelby has me looking over my sister’s shoulder.

  “Hi, Shelby.”

  “I want to know if I can count on you to help set up the park for the festival?” It’s the way she says “count on you” that has me feeling guilty. Every year since I can remember, I’ve always helped out with the festival. Not that she’d know this since it’s her first year taking over. I glimpse quickly at my sister, who’s scowling at me.

  “Of course, I’ll be there.”

  “Thanks,” Shelby says before she turns toward the church. This time, Meredith’s hand does connect with my shoulder. My big coat mostly blocks her slap, but I still feel it. She points at me, but doesn’t say anything before walking away. I’m left standing in the parking lot with just about every member of the congregation staring at me.

  Great!

  Twenty-One

  Delaney

  It’s been a week since Fish and I spent the night together, stranded because of the storm. I wish I could say I haven’t thought about him, but there’s no use in lying to myself. The two almost kisses continue to replay in my mind. I wish I could remember the taste of his lips, but I don’t. I’ve spent the last week pestering Dominic with questions about Aiden, wondering if he’s dated since his wife passed away. I’m curious when I shouldn’t be. Eager to see him and when all we can be is friends. Desperate to run into him again, almost as if it’s a game between us. Yet, I have to remind myself, Aiden and I live completely different lifestyles and thousands of miles away from each other and a winter romance is something neither of us need right now.

  My dad and I walk through the park with our boots kicking up the freshly fallen snow. The park is now this magical kingdom of happiness just in time for the winter festival to begin. People from all over the state are here to sell their homemade goods, mingle with people they only see a few times a year and to have fun.

  Since my father’s election as mayor, he has really transformed our sleepy, cozy little town into somewhere fairy-tale like, and made the festival into one of the “must-see” events around the state. People from as far as New Hampshire, Massachusetts and Canada flock to take part.

  In my teens, the festival used to be my favorite winter event, followed by the town’s ice hockey game. This was really the only time I could hit Dominic, if we were lucky enough to be on opposite teams, and get away with it. While I enjoy ice-skating, hockey is something I’d rather watch, and my parents knew this. Yet, they encouraged me to play in this one game.

  The booth my father asked me to work at today stands before me. My name is etched onto an arch above the window, and below it says, “Meet and Greet” and there are stanchions set up. The plan is to hand out tickets so I’m not stuck here all night. I want to enjoy the festival as well. Never in my career has my dad asked me for anything special until the other day, but I’m happy to do this for him.

  “What do you think?” Dad asks Calvin and me. I’m more concerned with what Calvin has to say since it’s his job to protect me.

  “How’s this going to work?” Calvin asks.

  “Well, I’m going to sit in the booth and give every good looking guy a kiss!” I glance at both men, watching their faces morph into anger and regret. “Just kidding,” I sa
y.

  “I was about to cancel this booth,” Dad adds. “Anyway, people will line up at the opening. Everyone must have a ticket, which they can get at the information booth. Delaney will meet with people for two hours each night.”

  “And what about photos?” Calvin asks. “If she’s in the booth, it might be sort of hard.”

  “People can lean in or whatever,” I tell Calvin. “Some may not want a photo.” My dad and Calvin look at me doubtfully and I shrug.

  Calvin checks out the structure, making sure it’s sturdy enough to withstand the onslaught of people that will be coming toward me. There’s a small space heater inside, meant to keep me warm. I appreciate the thought because it’s downright cold right now. Not all the top winter gear can keep the chill away, unfortunately.

  Of course, each time I shiver, my mind races to Trey and how I should be on the beach, basking under the warmth of the sun, not freezing in the frozen tundra. I don’t want to think about him and what he’s doing, but I can’t help it. I let him walk all over me because I was lonely and the only positive thing that has come out of it is being home. And Aiden, although he shouldn’t be a reason, since I haven’t seen or spoken to him since I left his house. I was at church that morning, listening to people talk about us. I thought about standing up and telling everyone that they had it wrong, but my mother told me it wouldn’t do any good.

  “Everything looks good here,” Calvin says after he’s finished his inspection. “Now what?”

  “Now,” my dad says, pointing toward the front of the park. “We kick off the holiday season right.” Calvin and I follow my dad toward the town Christmas tree. It’s been the same one we’ve decorated for as long as I can remember. People line up at the trellis lit with white lights, when they could easily go around the trees and enter the park that way. However, they respect my father and do as he’s asked.

  My dad takes his place behind a podium. My mom is there and she pulls me into a half hug. Dominic and Calvin shake hands before Dom takes his place next to Mom, with Calvin behind me. Dad motions for the first couple of people to come through, opening the floodgates. Behind us, carolers start to sing, bringing a huge grin to my father’s face. I think this is my dad’s favorite part of being mayor.