Hugged By An Angel

by Capizzi, Roberta

  Chapter Fifty-two

  Colin

  December 31, 2012

  Being a whole week without Kathleen made me feel a wreck so when I finally reached her house shortly before seven, I couldn’t wait to wrap her in my arms for a kiss. I’d managed to leave work early and I’d quickly showered and got dressed before getting into the car and driving straight to Galway. But, when I knocked on the door, it was David who opened and I was a bit disappointed I wasn’t going to get the same greeting as I had on Christmas day. David let me in, informing me that ‘the girls’ were still getting dressed and rolling his eyes as he said so.

  “I hope you managed to take a nap, because my friends sure know how to throw a party,” David said, grinning at me, and I was sure he wasn’t exaggerating. I’d come to know David well by now, and he never seemed to run out of energy whenever he’d come to Dublin and spend the weekend with us. I knew it was probably going to be a long night and I suddenly regretted not taking a nap before driving to Galway.

  “Kathy, your sweetheart’s here! Move your arse and get out of that bathroom!” he screamed down the corridor and the door to the bathroom opened slightly, just enough for Kathleen to peep out and say she’d be out in a minute. A moment later, she came out into the corridor and my jaw dropped as I stared at her from her head to her toes and up again. She was wearing a black tank top with a silver sequin pattern and satin black pants that fit snugly to her perfectly shaped legs and, I noticed as she twirled to show off her outfit, her bottom. Her hair was perfectly arranged with sparkling clips that let only a few strands fall to her shoulders and her make-up was flawless. She looked amazing, and for a moment I wished I could find an excuse to ditch her siblings and their friend’s party and just spend the whole night alone with her.

  “Do you like my outfit?” she asked shyly and I grinned, taking a step toward her. I took her in my arms, and bent down to kiss her neck, not wanting to spoil her make-up. God, she smelled amazing, too! How was I ever going to keep my hands off her all night?

  “You’re stunning,” I said, unable to come up with anything else, not even one of my stupid witty remarks I always used to tease her. She blushed, and I felt my heart melt.

  “So are you,” she whispered, tucking a curl behind my ear. I still hadn’t had time to go and get a proper haircut, but I would have to soon.

  “New Year’s resolution: get a haircut,” I said, winking at her and she giggled.

  “Hey, who are you and what did you do to my sister?” David said, interrupting our moment and eyeing Kathleen suspiciously; then he stormed back into the bathroom, shouting mockingly. “Kathy, Kathy, where are ya? I’ll rescue you, sis, don’t worry!”

  “David!” Kathleen screamed, shaking her head exasperatedly. “Stop acting like a clown. We’re gonna be late!”

  He popped his head out of the bathroom door, and grinned.

  “I just wanted to make sure you weren’t some alien who’d kidnapped my sister! Where’s Maggie, by the way?” he asked, rolling his eyes when Kathleen pointed at her bedroom. “That bloody girl’s always late! Maggie!” he shouted toward her bedroom. “For the love of God, will ya get out of that room and grant us the gift of your presence?”

  We heard some cursing coming out through the shut door and David took two steps toward the room, banging on the door until Maggie yanked it open.

  “Will you stop being such a child?” Maggie screamed and he shrugged.

  “I don’t know what took you so long to get ready; you’ve been locked in there for hours, and I don’t see any difference anyway,” he said, ducking his head when she aimed a slap at him and he stuck out his tongue at her. “Bad aim, as usual.”

  Maggie groaned and rolled her eyes. “One day David Sean O’Hagan I’ll make you regret all of this.”

  “I so can’t wait for that day, Mag,” David said, linking arms with her and batting his eyelashes.

  I found all this banter quite entertaining. Being an only child I’d missed all of this, all of the camaraderie Kathleen shared with her siblings, and even though Chris had always been like a brother to me it wasn’t the same. I was happy I was part of a family now.

  “Kids, are you finished?” I asked, staring at them with a scowl while Maggie was trying to break free from David’s grip. Kathleen giggled and shook her head, used to her sibling’s banter.

  Eventually, after a few more head slaps from Maggie which David deftly dodged, we managed to get out and walk to David’s friend’s house, the two of them still arguing while they walked ahead of us and my arm wrapped around Kathleen’s shoulder to keep her warm.

  Chapter Fifty-three

  Kathleen

  December 31, 2012

  The party was great, we had lots of fun and Maggie and David were too busy with their friends to start fighting again, so everything ran smoothly. It wasn’t until midnight approached that I realized I hadn’t thought of Declan all night and my heart filled with sorrow. How could I go on with my life and forget him like that, as if he’d never existed? Colin noticed my mood swing and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me into his chest.

  “Have I told you how extremely sexy you are tonight?” he said, playfully nuzzling my neck and making me shiver. I giggled and decided to ban all sad thoughts and simply enjoy the night with my wonderful boyfriend and my siblings.

  The countdown to midnight started and, as cheers and laughs exploded in the room, Colin spun me and kissed me passionately, making me dizzy. If these were the premises for what the new year had in store for me, well, I was pretty sure it was going to be a great one.

  “Happy New Year, Icy,” he whispered, his lips still on mine. I smiled, and tucked a rebellious strand of hair behind his ear again, brushing his lips with mine. “I love you, babe.”

  “Hey Byrne, get your hands off my sister for a moment so I can wish her a happy New Year!” David teased, and Colin immediately let go, raising his hands in surrender but laughing all the way. My brother’s arms went around me in a bear hug, and I enjoyed the familiar warmth of his embrace.

  “I promise this year will be a better one, sis,” he whispered in my ear, and I nodded against his sweater, knowing he was right. We had survived this year, we had reached the lowest point in our lives; now things could only get better.

  We left the party around two but walking the short distance to our house soon became a hard task considering how much we’d drunk. I’d never been a drinker and those few glasses of white wine were really taking their toll on me now. I held onto Colin’s arm to keep myself from falling face down and I could see Maggie and David walking arm in arm ahead of us, probably for the same reason. The cold air woke us from the alcoholic haze and as soon as we walked through the door, we were chatting and laughing as if it were late afternoon, totally oblivious to our parents sleeping in their bedroom.

  Maggie tried to shush us, but David and I had gone into hysterical laughing fits, and the more she tried, the harder we laughed. David kept saying stupid things that wouldn’t have made me laugh if I’d been sober, but that right now sounded like the greatest jokes.

  “Kids! Cut the racket, now! Go to sleep!”

  Our father’s voice boomed from the bedroom and David and I stared seriously at each other for a moment before bursting into hysterical laughter again. A second later I felt Colin’s arms around me and he hauled me up, positioning me on his shoulder with my upper body facing his back.

  “Sleepy time now, kids,” he said, and David giggled.

  “Doctor’s orders!” David said and, as Colin walked toward my bedroom, I saw Maggie smack the back of David’s head. This time his reflexes weren’t fast enough. When her hand hit his head I saw him wince and finally look as if he was ready for bed.

  I couldn’t remember what happened after Colin dropped me on my bed but when I woke up in the morning with a throbbing headache I hoped I hadn’t said or done anything really stupid.

  “New Year’s resolution: stay away from alcohol,” I mutt
ered to myself, my voice thick with sleep and my temples throbbing as if a drum was playing inside my head. Maggie was still sleeping so I got out of bed as quietly as I could and walked out to check if the guys were up.

  When I approached their room and saw the silhouette on Declan’s bed, my heart stopped for a moment and my eyes filled with tears. I stepped inside the room, careful not to make any noise and was approaching Declan’s bed when I heard David whisper my name.

  I turned and noticed he was propped up on his elbow, his wavy dark-blond hair mussed from sleep. I stepped closer to his bed and noticed his eyes were red and his cheeks stained with tears. I immediately sat on his bed and hugged him; if I knew my brother, I knew the exact reason he was crying. It was the same reason my eyes had filled with tears at the sight of someone on Declan’s bed.

  “When I woke up I thought it had all been a bad dream, that the accident had never happened and he was sleeping in his bed, just like last year.” David sniffled, and let out a long sigh; I squeezed him tighter and his arms wrapped around my body in response.

  “I know; I thought the same. I was walking toward the bed to check for myself.”

  Tears started to run down my cheeks and we cried in silence, holding on to each other and sharing our pain. In only a few days it would be one year since Declan died but it seemed we still hadn’t been able to get over the grief.

  When we pulled ourselves together and released the hug I looked him in the eye and smiled. We didn’t need any more words than those that had already been spoken in the past year; all it took was a look in each other’s eyes and we knew what the other felt. Yes, this year would be different. I’d be there for my brother and I knew he’d be there for me.

  David nudged me and grinned toward the other bed; when I turned, I noticed Colin was awake and staring awkwardly at us.

  “I sure hope we didn’t wake you, Byrne,” David said as I stood up, walked toward Declan’s bed and plopped down onto it. Colin smiled at me, and I kissed his lips.

  “Maybe I should’ve slept on the couch,” he whispered, with a shy look and I stared quizzically at him. “I shouldn’t have slept in your brother’s bed; I didn’t mean to take his place. I understand it must be tough for you guys.”

  I shook my head and hugged him, rubbing his back with both of my hands.

  “You’re part of the family now, Colin.” David had come closer to us and was standing next to the bed, facing us both. “You’ve filled the void he left, and it’s so much better to see someone sleeping in his bed instead of waking up to it empty. It reminds me that life goes on, in spite of it all.”

  His voice cracked and I knew that the last thing he wanted was to be seen crying, especially by another man, so I stood up and cheerily suggested we all go for breakfast before it was time for us to pack up and go back to Dublin.

  Chapter Fifty-four

  Colin

  March 16, 2013

  The new year had started with great news for both me and Kathleen. I had applied for a job in Sligo General Hospital a little after Halloween, ever since Kathleen had mentioned she’d love to move to Rosses Point if I wanted it too, and I’d received a phone call in February. I would be starting at the beginning of April which would leave just enough time for us to move all of our stuff up to Gran’s while we started looking for a house.

  I’d briefly stopped in my tracks when they’d given me the news, wondering if this was a little too soon: moving in with Gran and looking for a house of our own, especially since I hadn’t yet asked Kathleen to marry me. Even though she hardly ever slept at her house anymore, she hadn’t actually moved in with me. When I went to work in the morning she’d go back to her house, spend time with her friend, work on her manuscript and come back in time for dinner. We both knew she still had her own place to retreat to in case she wanted to get away from us for a while if we had an argument or something—although we hadn’t had any, so far. However, moving in with Gran and looking for a house where we’d be living were important steps in our relationship, something that once we’d done would be hard to undo. But then again, I couldn’t imagine living with anyone else but her so I knew this was the right thing to do, the right way to go. I loved her, she loved me. No need to fuss too much about stupid things.

  The other good thing that happened only a few days ago was that Kathleen had signed a contract with a Dublin-based publisher. She had been beside herself with joy and I was obviously very proud of her; she’d gone through a self-pitying phase, followed by a depressing phase. One night I’d gone to see her at her house since she hadn’t answered my messages or my calls, only to find her with red, swollen eyes and pages of the manuscript scattered all over her bedroom floor, bed and furniture. She’d lost all self-confidence, and nothing David or I told her had seemed to work. I’d actually been a little mad at Declan for not helping her, for not coming back to comfort her, because I’d understood that the only person she would’ve listened to was him. So when she got the phone call from that publisher, I’d secretly thanked Declan, sure he was behind all this.

  Now, as we were unpacking in our hotel room in New York, I wondered how she would react to the little surprise I had in store for her, and if she’d be half as happy as she’d been when she’d received that phone call. Well, I hoped she would, because if she didn’t, it would crush my heart.

  Chris and Melissa had organized the christening of their son in time for our trip to New York, and they’d invited us for dinner so we could meet our godchild, although we’d seen him on Skype from the day he was born. When Chris told me they’d named their son James, just like my father, my heart melted. He knew how much this would mean to me and I knew nothing I would ever do or say would be enough to thank him for that.

  When we reached their apartment and got out of the car, Kathleen took my hand and stared at me with a smile.

  “Last year you had to carry me up the stairs; it feels almost unreal,” she whispered, and I squeezed her hand as we walked up the seven steps.

  When Chris opened the door we were both wrapped in a bear hug before we could say a word, and Kathleen chuckled when he finally released us and let us in. Melissa was in the kitchen, trying to feed James something he didn’t seem to like too much and, as we walked in, she stood up and walked toward us, handing James to me and hugging Kathleen.

  I stood there, awkwardly holding this little bundle with blond curls and blue eyes, and when he gave me a toothless grin and patted my cheeks with his chubby hands, I felt a weird pang in my chest, a strange need I’d never felt before.

  I wanted a baby.

  For almost thirty years I’d lived my life thinking I’d never get to love someone and I’d never have a family of my own, and I’d been sort of okay with that. But in the last twelve months all my priorities had changed, and I’d found myself wanting to love, wanting to get married and now wanting to have a baby. Kathleen had changed my vision of life, of love, of the future, and I just couldn’t wait for tomorrow. I’d organized a great surprise for her after the christening; I’d already told Chris, hoping he wouldn’t mind but, just like I’d expected, he’d been almost more excited than I was. I couldn’t wait to see her reaction.

  Kathleen turned to look at me and when our eyes met she gave me a smile full of love. She came toward me, taking James from my arms so I could hug Melissa. The vision of Kathleen holding the baby while he tugged at her hair, making her laugh, caused my heart to do a back flip in my chest. I knew it was no longer a question: I was ready to have a baby, I was ready to start a family of my own. With Kathleen. Just the two of us, and our babies. Nothing else would ever matter.

  Chapter Fifty-five

  Kathleen

  March 17, 2013

  I woke up on my second St. Patrick’s Day in New York, but this time everything was different. I could walk, I wasn’t gloomy anymore, I’d just signed a contract for my book and I was sleeping in a very comfortable king-sized bed with the man of my dreams. Only a year ago I was fighting no
t to fall for him and now I was lying naked next to him, his arm wrapped around me and my head on his bare chest, moving with its rise and fall.

  I loved this handsome, romantic, sexy, happy-go-lucky man who’d pulled me up from the pit I’d fallen into after Declan died and who’d been able to show me that true love could overcome obstacles and work miracles.

  When I’d seen him holding Chris and Melissa’s son last night I’d felt something stir inside of me, a strange longing I’d never felt before, and I’d found myself wishing it was our baby he was holding.

  I wanted a baby. I wanted a baby with him. A Colin mini-me, with blue eyes and brown curls, and his gorgeous smile and dimples. I wanted a house with a garden and windows overlooking the sea. I wanted to wait for Colin to come home at night and prepare him a nice dinner. I wanted to fall asleep on the couch while watching a movie. I wanted to wake up every single day of my life seeing his beautiful face and mussed curls first thing.

  Colin stirred and brushed his hand across his eyes, turning his head to look at me with a smile.

  “Happy anniversary, Icy,” he said with a grin, and I scowled at him, then kissed his dimple and moved to his mouth, where I lingered a little longer, just enough to wake him up completely. I giggled and pushed him away, getting out of bed and saying I was going to have a shower. When I turned and he saw the naughty grin on my face, he kicked away the sheets and reached me, scooping me up in his arms before I’d managed to reach the bathroom door.

  I’d been a little emotional during James’ christening, and Colin made fun of me, although I’d seen his eyes were glistening, too. Two hours in the party at Chris and Melissa’s, Colin took my hand and pulled me up from the couch, saying we had to go. I stared quizzically at him, and he shrugged without saying another word. I tried to point out it would be rude to leave like that, but he told me Chris and Melissa knew we’d be leaving early.