Hugged By An Angel

by Capizzi, Roberta

  I barely had time to say goodbye to both of them and give James a quick peck before Colin literally dragged me out of their house and into a taxi that was waiting outside. He used his tie to blindfold me, although I tried to object without much success. He didn’t remove it until the taxi stopped and he’d helped me step out.

  When my eyes adjusted, I gasped and smiled broadly: the Empire State Building. The exact same place where he’d first kissed me, at the exact same time of day. This was the most romantic thing he could do to celebrate our anniversary. I felt my eyes fill with tears.

  He took my hand and we walked inside where he retrieved the tickets he had, once again, very wisely booked, and we rode up to the deck in silence. I was too overwhelmed to find words and he looked a little nervous, although I couldn’t quite tell why.

  As we reached the last floor and got out onto the top deck I felt my heart thud in my chest, and I started walking around in amazement, taking it all in. It was a thousand times better than it had been from the wheelchair, and I started acting like a child, going from one spot to the other, pointing out at things, waving as an airplane soared above us and giggling all the time, while Colin followed me in silence with a proud smile on his face.

  When I eventually calmed down, I turned toward him and took his face in my hands, kissing him slowly and savoring this moment. This was something I’d never in a million years be able to forget.

  “This is so romantic, Colin. Thank you so much for planning all this,” I said, my voice cracking with the myriad of emotions running through my body. “It’s the best anniversary gift you could give me.”

  He smiled and brushed my cheek with his thumb. I instinctively closed my eyes and enjoyed the tingling that still cursed through my body at his touch.

  “Actually, I haven’t given you the real gift yet,” he whispered in my ear, and as I opened my eyes he was only inches from my mouth. He kissed the tip of my nose and took my hands in his, lacing his fingers with mine.

  “This has been the best year of my life,” he said seriously, and I smiled. “Before I met you, my life was empty, useless. After you came into my life, the sun came out again and everything changed. I changed. I found myself again, my real self, the one that had hidden somewhere after my parents died. Because of you, my life has meaning again. You’ve mended my heart, my soul, you’ve given me hope and I’d never be able to thank you quite enough for what you’ve done, for how you’ve changed my life. I could never be able to go back to a life without you, Kathleen.”

  I squeezed his hands, feeling tears prickle my eyes, knowing it wouldn’t be long before they started running down my cheeks. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, hoping it would be enough to keep them at bay. When I thought I’d managed, I opened them again and gave a start: he was down on one knee in front of me.

  “I don’t want to ever live without you, Kathleen. Ever again. My life means nothing without you, so please, make me the happiest man on earth and say you will marry me, Kathleen.”

  My heart jumped up in my throat and my hands started to sweat. Was this really happening or was I dreaming it? It felt like a fairy tale, but he was real, he was right there in front of me, holding my hand and looking at me with a worried expression as if he thought I’d say no. I smiled and swallowed the lump in my throat, knowing I needed to put him out of his misery but unable to find the voice to say yes. So I simply nodded, as a single tear drifted down my cheek and my face cracked into a smile. He stood up and took my face in his hands, narrowing his eyes.

  “Was that a yes?” he asked, and I nodded again, my smile even broader now.

  “Yes,” I whispered and his lips were on mine a second later as my hands went up around his back and I pulled him closer to me. I didn’t care that we were surrounded by other people, I didn’t care that most of them had been watching us and I giggled when a group of tourists erupted in a big cheer.

  “Ladies and gentlemen,” he shouted, after he pulled back, “this awesome woman has just agreed to marry me!” I blushed as more cheers, shouts and whistles exploded around us. Colin wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me close and kissing the top of my head. When all the sensation his announcement had caused subsided, he looked down at me and fumbled for something inside his jacket, handing me a small velvet case. I stared at it, then at him and when I opened it, I gasped at the sight of a beautiful white gold Claddagh ring, the Irish symbol of love, loyalty and friendship with an emerald embedded in the heart the two hands were holding. My vision blurred again, and I blinked, staring up at him, and noticed his eyes were glistening.

  “It was my mother’s; my father gave it to her before she went back to America, the summer they met,” he said, and cleared his throat when his voice cracked. “I can buy you another one, if you don’t like it or you think it’s too old-fashioned…”

  “It’s perfect, Colin. I’ll never take it off,” I whispered against his lips and he smiled, taking the case from my hand and placing the ring on my finger. It was a perfect fit, and once again I thought we were simply meant to be. The lump in my throat came back, and I flung my arms around his neck, letting him lift me off the ground.

  It was then, as I was wondering if Declan would be happy about this, that I felt a familiar warmth engulf me; when I opened my eyes, I saw a rainbow in the New York sky, although it hadn’t been raining, and I remembered my brother’s words: “Look for me in a rainbow, in the wind, in a blue sky. You’ll see me there, smiling at you from Heaven.”

  Declan was there, hugging me in his own angelic way and giving us his blessing.

  So many things had changed in a year. Only a year ago tragedy had struck my family, my heart had been crushed and my future had seemed uncertain. But things had slowly worked themselves out, day after day, and I was sure they were going to look up. I hadn’t moved to New York like I’d planned over a year ago, but I was living exactly the life I wanted and with a man who seemed to have walked straight out of my dreams. Now I was healthy, happy and in love, and I realized it was all because, when I’d lost all hope and faith in life, I’d been hugged by an angel.

  The End

  If you enjoyed this book, please consider leaving a review on the site where you bought it, as well as on Goodreads, if you’re a member. And do not hesitate to get in touch with Roberta: She loves connecting with readers and book lovers!

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  An avid reader since her childhood years and being an only child, Roberta always enjoyed the company of her fictional friends from the children’s books she loved reading, while she dreamed of writing her own stories one day.

  It was when she discovered novels by authors Rosamunde Pilcher and Maeve Binchy in her teenage years that she realized it was time she put down in words the stories she had kept well hidden in her mind until then.

  What started as a hobby, soon turned into a real passion and a way of life, until she could no longer keep the stories to herself, and decided to get over her fears and share them with the world.

  Roberta lives in Italy, but her dream is to move out of her country and live either in a thatched cottage in the Irish countryside or in a country house with a swing on the back porch, somewhere in the United States, where she would love to spend her days writing novels as a full-time job, and maybe one day even get as far as writing a screenplay for a movie.

  Visit Roberta’s blog for updates on her writing: http://robertasdreamworld.wordpress.com or connect with her on Twitter @SligoRoo, Facebook ‘RobertasDreamworld’, Goodreads, Google+ and Pinterest.

  Other books by Roberta:

  The Melody In Our Hearts–now available on Amazon, Smashwords and Createspace.

  Official blurb:

  Doctor Valerie Fogarty studied hard to become a competent surgeon, but losing a patient during an operation made her throw everything out the window and now she can’t set foot into an operating room anymore. Until her best friend Ryan is brought into the ER on a stretcher, fighting for his life after
a terrible car accident and she’s the only one who can save him. Meeting him as a teenager in their hometown in Ireland was the turning point in her life and she knows she will never be able to live without him. Will her determination and skills be enough to save Ryan’s life?

  Jazz Star Ryan Wyler grew up in Dublin, with a dream of becoming a professional pianist and continuing the legacy of his musical hero, Frank Sinatra. When opportunity knocks and he’s offered the chance to pursue a real music career, he’s happy to accept it, unaware that what he’s actually accepting is a package deal he will have no control over. But when success keeps him away from Valerie, his best friend since adolescence, Ryan will have to question his choices.

  The melody in our hearts: A story about the value of true friendship, the power of dreams, and the unpredictability of love.

  The Melody In Our Hearts – Chapter One

  *** March 2009 ***

  Valerie sat on the floor outside the operating room, her coat splattered in blood, her hair sticking to her head underneath the surgical cap, her face buried in her hands and warm, salty tears rolling down her cheeks.

  She couldn’t believe it.

  He was dead.

  She had killed him.

  Doctor Gray, her supervisor and chief surgeon, had trusted her to operate on the man since it was such an easy operation and needed little experience. He shouldn’t have died. There should have been no complications.

  But he had died.

  On her table.

  She had killed him.

  The thought made her sick to her stomach, and she had to rush to the sink where they scrubbed up before and after an operation to keep from vomiting on the floor. But nothing came out. It was probably all in her mind. Images kept flashing through her mind, the sound of the alarm telling them his heart had stopped beating still rang in her ears, and it suddenly became too much to bear.

  Her nerves were shattered, and she couldn’t think straight; she wanted to bang her head against the wall until all those images would fade away. She wondered how on Earth she was going to walk out there and tell his family that he was dead. That she had killed him.

  She started shaking and she knew she should probably leave, before someone could see her in that state. She couldn’t lose it in front of her colleagues or, even worse, in front of the chief surgeon. She had been working hard to prove she was a good cardiac surgeon, and she didn’t want to look like a weak crying girl, although right now it was exactly how she felt.

  But it had somehow been her fault; she had killed him. She wasn’t a doctor anymore–she was a murderer now.

  The door behind her opened and she winced, holding onto the sink for support, but she didn’t turn back to see who it was. She didn’t want anyone to see her like that, and she hoped that, whoever it was, they would just walk past her and pretend she wasn’t there.

  “Valerie, are you okay?” Doctor Gray asked, his voice deep and almost concerned.

  She flinched when she felt his hand on her shoulder, but she was too ashamed to turn back and she was sure her voice would give her away, so she simply nodded.

  “It wasn’t your fault,” he said gently. “It was something none of us could have foreseen. You did your best, we did the best we could. I know it’s hard when you lose your first patient, but you did nothing wrong. I couldn’t do anything either, and I’ve been a surgeon for over thirty years now. Even the best doctors can fail; we’re only human after all.”

  She was forcing herself to look strong and in control, but a sob escaped her lips involuntarily and, as Doctor Gray patted her shoulder to try to comfort her, she lost it completely and turned back to hug him and cry like a child in her father’s arms.

  When she eventually pulled herself together, Doctor Gray told her to take the rest of the day off and she gladly accepted his suggestion. She changed into her clean clothes, balled her scrubs up and put them into a plastic bag, the sight of blood suddenly making her nauseous. As she walked out and took a breath of the crisp Boston air she felt a little better, but she knew there was only one person that would make her feel okay: Ryan, her best friend since she was thirteen.

  He had been her rock, her safe haven, her big brother and confidant over the past fifteen years and if there was one person in the world who could mend her shattered nerves now it was Ryan. It didn’t matter that he was a jazz star now, and that screaming girls threw themselves at him; when he was with her, he was still the easygoing, funny and loving guy from Dublin, who’d moved to Boston to pursue the dream of becoming a professional pianist and had managed to make it come true.

  While she was still struggling to become a competent surgeon, he had made his name known in the musical world and he was already on his third album. He had been around the world twice already, and his latest North American tour had been sold-out within days.

  His sudden success had been tough on Valerie; although she had obviously been happy for her friend, she had feared that things would change and that he would end up neglecting her, forgetting how special their friendship was and how important he was to her. Over the last four years he’d been all over the world, slept in five-star hotels and traveled in limousines, but he had always had time for her, even just for a quick call or a text message to wish her goodnight—or good morning accordingly—from the other side of the world. He had always made her feel special and loved, and Valerie knew she would never be able to imagine her life without Ryan in it.

  When she heard his voice on the intercom, Valerie felt the tears prick her eyes again and she barely reached his door before she burst into desperate sobs. Ryan took her in his arms and pulled her inside, helping her to sit down on the couch and holding her close to his chest until the sobs subsided.

  “What’s wrong, Val?” he asked her, using the soothing, sweet tone he had always used when they were young and she would go crying to him because some stupid girl at school had said something nasty to her.

  “I killed him…he died on my table…Doctor Gray said he would let me do it, but I failed…I failed and he’s dead…” she said through another round of sobs. Ryan tilted her chin up with his finger and stared into her silver blue eyes.

  “Is this the patient you were telling me about yesterday?” he asked sweetly, and she nodded.

  “I couldn’t save him, Ryan. I tried, God I swear I tried. I did everything by the book, every single step and it didn’t work. I killed a man and I’ll never be able to forgive myself for this.”

  She sighed and brushed her hands across her eyes, pressing on them as if it would make those awful images go away. She shuddered as the image of the dead man on the table flashed like a neon light in front of her eyes, and Ryan wrapped his arms tighter around her.

  “It wasn’t your fault, Valerie. You’re not even supposed to feel responsible for that because you did all you could, all a person could do. You can’t perform miracles.” he said soothingly, rubbing the small of her back, with his chin resting on the top of her head.

  She shook her head, tears still streaming down her cheeks.

  “I’m a doctor, for Heaven’s sakes. I swore to save lives, but I was the one who took his, instead.”

  She bent her head and sniffled.

  “You didn’t take his life, Val. You’re not God–you’re just a doctor. A good doctor who’s saved many lives so far and will save even more in future. Nobody thinks it’s your fault. Stop blaming yourself for this.”

  “No, no, no, it was my fault! You don’t understand...I was supposed to make his heart start beating again, to fix whatever the problem was and bring that man back from the dead, but I failed...”

  She started sobbing again, and he hugged her tighter, shushing her soothingly.

  “I failed,” she repeated. “I failed, and I killed him.”

  “No, you didn’t! Stop saying that! You tried to save him. You and the other doctor did everything you could, but I guess it was his time to die, that’s all.”

  She pulled back and he re
leased his hug. When she looked at him, he saw her eyes were flaring.

  “It wasn’t his time!” she snapped and stood up abruptly, moving away from him. “Stop pretending I didn’t do anything! I killed a man, he died on my operating table–I was the one who promised him and his family that he’d be okay!”

  Ryan knew that, no matter how many times he tried to tell her it hadn’t been her fault, in the state of mind Valerie was now his words would remain unheard. Valerie could be so stubborn when she wanted, but she was also very emotional and way too empathic; ever since she’d told him, when she was just fifteen, that one day she would become a doctor, he’d known that this day would come, the day when she’d be overwhelmed by grief for a patient she hadn’t been able to save. She didn’t need his reasoning now; she needed her best friend, the shoulder she could cry on.

  He stood up and walked toward her, wrapping her in a bear hug a moment later. She tried to fight him, but when he didn’t let her go, she relaxed in his arms and leant into him.

  “Go lie down now, you look like you could use a little rest.” Ryan said after a while, smiling encouragingly, but she shook her head.

  “I don’t need to sleep. I don’t want to sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I see that man, his dead body on my table….” She hid her face in her hands and started to sob again. “I’ll never be able to sleep again, never.”

  “Please, Val, please don’t do this. Don’t hurt yourself this way; it’s breaking my heart. You didn’t kill anyone–you tried to save him, you did all you could. For the hundredth time, it wasn’t your fault.” He hugged her again and kissed her brow. “You’ll be fine. You’ll be back to normal in no time. You’re strong enough to get over this; I know you.”