Seb

by Cheryl Douglas

  “So what now?” Kane asked, leaning back in his chair. “I don’t even want to think about how Seb reacted when you saw him. Is there any going back from that, or did my brother mess things up too badly for you to ever forgive him?”

  The things Seb had said, his blatant lack of trust in me, had hurt. “Honestly, I don’t know. But my first order of business is to let Jarod have it. I don’t have his home address. I don’t suppose you do?”

  “I think so.” He pulled his phone out of the pocket of his jeans and scrolled through it. “Yeah, here it is.”

  I pulled my phone out of my purse and brought up Jarod’s contact information. “Would you mind?”

  “Sure.”

  I watched him transfer the information from my phone to his before I asked, “Do you think what Seb felt for me was real? I know we haven’t known each other long, but it felt real to me.”

  “He was crazy about you, no doubt in my mind about that.” Kane handed my phone back to me. “He may not always make the best decisions when it comes to women, but I think all of the Steele brothers could be accused of that.”

  I smiled, appreciating Kane’s honesty. “I really wanted this to work. I thought I’d finally found someone who would always have my back. Seb seemed like the kind of man I could count on—”

  “Always,” Kane interjected. “I know it may not feel like that now, but that guy would take a bullet for someone he loves. You may not feel like you’re a part of that group yet, and maybe you’re not, I don’t know. But if it ever gets to that point, you’ll have someone you can always count on, I can promise you that.”

  “The prospect of losing my uncle is scary as hell,” I admitted, swallowing my tears. “He’s always been the only person I could count on. I have a few friends, but it’s not the same. They have their own lives, their own families.”

  “And you’ll have no one,” he said softly.

  I hated that I’d let a tear slip down my cheek. I quickly brushed it away, hoping that he hadn’t noticed. “It’s not that I went looking for a relationship because I need a man to take care of me. I don’t. I can take care of myself—”

  “And your uncle, from what Seb tells me. He, uh, mentioned that you’d sold your house and moved in with your uncle to help take care of him. I can’t tell you how much I respect that. The way we lost our mother…” Kane shook his head, obviously trying to keep his emotions in check. “Let’s just say we all understand how important family is.”

  I nodded, suddenly anxious to escape. “Well, I guess I should get going. I’d like to catch Jarod before he goes to work.”

  Kane stood and walked me to the door. “Good luck with that. If he gives you a hard time, let me know.” He grinned. “I’ll gladly kick the shit out of him for trying to mess things up for you and my brother.”

  “Thanks,” I said, returning his smile. “But I don’t think it’ll come to that.”

  He grabbed my hand when I was over the threshold. I turned to face him, and he pulled me into his arms.

  “Something tells me you’re good for my brother,” he whispered. “Don’t give up on him, okay?”

  I patted Kane’s back before withdrawing from his embrace. “I can’t make any promises. I have no idea what the future holds for me and Seb.”

  ***

  Jarod looked stunned when I showed up on his doorstep unannounced. Good, I had the element of surprise working in my favor.

  “How dare you tell Kane we’re dating!” I shoved him and walked past when he stumbled back. As much as I’d have liked to let his neighbors know what a deceitful bastard he was, I had too much to say to stand outside and say it.

  “Sky, I get that you’re upset,” he said, slamming the door. “But calm down and hear me out.”

  I glanced from the closed door back to him, realizing I’d better keep my temper in check. I’d thought I knew Jarod, but clearly I didn’t. The only thing I knew for sure was that I was behind closed doors with a man who carried a gun and was apparently willing to go to any lengths to eliminate his competition. Maybe I should have thought this through before I stormed over here, hell-bent on revenge.

  “Fine,” I said. “Tell me why the hell you’d tell my boyfriend’s brother that you and I were dating when I made it clear I only wanted to be friends.”

  He adopted a sullen look before letting his head fall forward. “I like you. A lot. As soon as we met, I knew you were special. I thought if we built a friendship first, it could evolve into more if we took it slow and you got to know me.”

  If not for Seb, that wouldn’t have been out of the realm of possibility. A couple of my relationships had started out as friendships. “But when I told you about Seb—”

  “I panicked. We haven’t known each other long, but I was already pretty invested in getting a shot with you. When I found out you weren’t single anymore, my mind started racing with ways to get him out of the way.”

  I understood how it had happened, but I couldn’t believe I’d been so blind I hadn’t seen it coming. I considered myself a reasonable judge of character, but I’d certainly missed the mark with Jarod.

  “I thought you were my friend. I can’t believe you did this to me.” He stepped forward, but I stepped back, raising a hand. “If you were interested in more, you could have been honest with me, given me a chance to explain to you why it would never work. You didn’t have to go behind my back and destroy what I was building with Seb.”

  His shoulders slumped, his face expressionless. “There’s no excuse for what I did. I guess I just hate being alone. I loved being married in the beginning. I want that again with someone like you.”

  “You don’t even know me.” I tried to put myself in his position, and that softened my anger. We really weren’t that different beneath the surface. We both wanted someone to love, someone we could count on. “And you sure as hell can’t expect to build a relationship on lies and deceit.”

  “I know.” He sighed. “After what happened with my ex-wife, I swore I’d never treat anyone the way she treated me, and you sure as hell didn’t deserve this. I’m sorry, Sky.”

  I hadn’t intended to come over and grant forgiveness, not that I was ready to forgive yet, but I wasn’t as enraged as I’d been. My anger had given way to sadness. Now I was alone again, and so was Seb. “You’ll find what you’re looking for.”

  I didn’t know why I felt compelled to reassure him. Maybe because I wanted to believe if there was someone out there for him, there was someone for me too. I thought I’d found everything I was looking for in Seb, but when it came down to it, he was missing one of the main characteristics I needed in a life partner—the ability to trust.

  “I can talk to Seb if you think it’ll help?”

  I thought it was pretty brave of him to offer, but then I remembered he had been trained in self-defense. “No, I don’t think so.”

  “I’ll tell Kane—”

  “He already knows. I just came from his house.” I pinched my lips together, feeling my bitterness rise along with my words. “It’s ironic I was able to convince him I was telling the truth but not his brother.”

  “Maybe Seb just needs some time. I’m sure Kane will set him straight.”

  “Maybe, but I can’t have a relationship with a man who would take an acquaintance’s word over mine.” I’d thought about Seb a lot on my way over to Jarod’s house, trying to process everything after my talk with Kane, and it was obvious Seb was punishing me for the sins of his past lovers. That wasn’t fair. To either of us. I pushed past Jarod. “I have to go. Please don’t call me again.”

  “Skylar, I really am sorry.”

  Not half as sorry as I was for befriending him. Of course, if it hadn’t come from Jarod, my relationship with Seb would have been tested in some other way, and I was sad to acknowledge the outcome would have been the same.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Seb

  It had been ten long days and nights since I’d seen Skylar, and I was climb
ing the walls without her. I’d texted earlier, asking her to stop by the shop today so we could talk about her uncle’s car. She responded with two words: I’ll try.

  If only I’d tried harder to believe in her and us, to make it work no matter the obstacles, to give her the benefit of the doubt instead of assuming the worst.

  Kane tapped on my office door before poking in his head. “Is it safe to come in?”

  My brothers had given me a wide berth after news spread about my screw-up with Skylar, but Kane was the one who’d made me see what a huge mistake I’d made. He came to see me the night she visited him. He felt guilty that he’d planted the seed of doubt in my mind and wanted to apologize for his mistake. But it wasn’t his mistake. It was mine. I should have known she wasn’t like the other women who’d betrayed me. She was so much better than all the rest combined, and I’d thrown her away in a fit of temper.

  “Yeah, sure.” There was no point in taking my bad mood out on those around me. I had to man up and admit it was my fault and I was getting what I deserved.

  “Saw Jarod today,” he said, closing the door. “Thought you’d want to know I let him have it for coming between you and Skylar.”

  Even the sound of her name made me flinch, as though every reminder was a physical blow. “As much as I’d love to beat the shit out of him just to take my aggression out on someone, I did this. I can’t put it on him.”

  Kane smirked before sitting across from me. “How very evolved of you, little brother.”

  “Don’t be a smartass. I’m serious.” I ran my hands over my face, wishing I could hide from the world. I didn’t want to look my brothers in the eye and admit I’d somehow screwed up this relationship thing all over again. Only this time, I hadn’t chosen the wrong woman and let her get too close. I’d found the right woman and let her get away. “I have to face facts. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this bullshit. Maybe I’m supposed to be single and alone for the rest of my life.”

  “Quit feeling sorry for yourself,” Kane said, clenching his jaw. “You’re starting to piss me off. You don’t believe that any more than I do. You want what Ryker and Mac have. I know you do, so you can’t give up. I won’t let you.”

  His support meant everything to me, but no one could bring Skylar back to me. She’d made it clear from the onset what kind of man she wanted, and I’d fallen short.

  “If I can’t have her, I don’t want anyone else.” To me, it was that cut-and-dried. I’d already found the perfect girl. There was no point looking any more since I’d just compare everyone else to her. That wouldn’t have been fair to them or me.

  “You went through the same thing with Emma. You bounced back eventually.”

  I understood why Kane thought the two situations were similar, but in my heart, they couldn’t have been more different. I’d been with Emma for almost a year and still hadn’t been ready to take our relationship to the next level. I’d been with Skylar a fraction of the time and was ready to go all in.

  “I’m not gonna bounce back from this.” I clenched my fists until my nails dug into my palms. “Honestly, I don’t even want to, man.”

  “Then you need to go to her and tell her how you feel. Do whatever you have to do to get her back.”

  It wasn’t as if I hadn’t been thinking about doing just that almost every minute since she walked out on me. My only reprieve had been working on her uncle’s car. It was coming together. Ironic since my life was falling apart.

  “I can’t change what happened or the way I reacted,” I said, feeling my frustration mounting. “I can’t erase that from her memory. If she agreed to take me back, she would always have some doubt about whether she could count on me. She’d wonder if, when my back was against the wall, I would cut her loose again.”

  “Would you?”

  “Never.”

  “Then she needs to at least hear that.” When I shook my head, Kane said, “Listen, I’m no expert on relationships, but watching Mac and Ryker all these years has taught me one thing.”

  “What’s that?”

  “People make mistakes. As long as you’re both committed to staying together, time is on your side.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” I’d never known Kane to be the philosophical type, but if the last week and a half had taught me anything, it was that I didn’t know as much as I thought I did. Sometimes I got it wrong, and when I did, it seemed nothing could make things right.

  “It means you can say you’re sorry a hundred times, but those are only words. Only time will convince her you mean it. Be there for her when she needs you. It seems to me that’s all Skylar has ever really wanted—a man she can count on.”

  I would have given anything to be that man. If only she’d let me.

  A knock on the door made my head snap up and my pulse pound. Maybe it was her. “Come in.”

  The door opened slowly, and Emma poked her head in. “Hey, Seb. You got a minute?”

  I couldn’t have been more stunned. Kane shot me a look, obviously trying to decide if I’d been expecting her. I shook my head to let him know I was as surprised as he was. Maybe more so.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” I asked, jumping up from behind my desk.

  She glanced at Kane, a nervous smile tipping her lips. “Hey, Kane.”

  I could tell she was the last person Kane wanted or expected to see. My brothers had long memories, just as I did. When someone screwed over one of us, we all took it as a personal affront.

  “Hey. Seb asked you a question, and I’d like to hear the answer too. What the hell are you doing here, Emma?”

  She looked so different from the last time I’d seen her. She’d aged and lost weight. Her lustrous dark hair seemed thinner, and she wore very little makeup. I wondered what the hell she’d been through to cause such a dramatic change.

  “I was hoping to talk to you,” she said, glancing at me. “I know you’re busy. I won’t take too much of your time.”

  “You want to talk to me now?” I couldn’t believe this. “After you walked out of my life without a word three years ago? What could you possibly have to say that I’d want to hear?”

  “I thought you might be curious about what happened to me.”

  I’d have been lying if I said I wasn’t.

  “At the very least, I owe you an explanation.”

  “Too little, too late, if you ask me,” Kane muttered, standing.

  But I hadn’t asked him. I wanted to hear what she had to say, to know why she’d left me, if for no other reason than to put it behind me once and for all. “Kane, I’ll catch up with you later, okay?”

  Kane glared at Emma when he said to me, “Make things right with Skylar, little brother. That girl’s worth fighting for.”

  Emma winced as Kane walked out of the office, leaving the door ajar. “Wow, I guess I don’t have to ask how your brothers feel about me, do I?”

  “How do you expect them to feel after what you did to me?” I thought I’d loved this girl, but what I felt for Skylar now made me question whether I really had.

  “You’re right.” She licked her lips, twisting her hands. I noted they were free of the chunky silver rings she used to favor. “They have every reason to hate me. So do you.”

  “I don’t hate you.” I had when she left, but that resentment had lessened with time. I was left with only confusion and a bit of relief when I’d finally admitted to myself that she wasn’t the woman for me.

  “I’m glad to hear that.” She offered a slight smile, and not even that was as radiant as it used to be. It was as if the light in her eyes was gone. Her vivacity had vanished. “I’ve been watching your show, Seb. Congratulations on your success.”

  “Thanks.” I’d been successful when she left. I just hadn’t been on TV then. I sat back on the edge of my desk, crossing my arms. I wasn’t really sure whether Skylar would show up today, but if she did, I didn’t want her to find me alone in my office with my ex. “I don’t have a lot of
time to talk. I’m expecting someone.”

  “You have a girlfriend now. I saw her on your show last night.”

  That was the first episode Skylar had appeared in. There would be more in the coming weeks, then I assumed my foul mood would tell the world what I didn’t intend to—that we’d split. “It’s been three years. You must have assumed I would get on with my life eventually. I’m sure you have too.”

  “Not really,” she said, looking uncomfortable. “I haven’t really had the chance.”

  I scowled, not sure what she was getting at, but if she’d come here looking for sympathy, she’d come to the wrong place. “Meaning?”

  She set her nondescript purse on the guest chair. I noticed for the first time she wasn’t wearing the designer clothes or shoes she used to favor. She was wearing skinny jeans and a white cotton tank top with cheap blue flip-flops.

  “I got in over my head. That’s why I had to leave. I knew it was all going down, and I didn’t want you to get caught up in my mess.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Her bottom lip was trembling, and I knew she was on the verge of tears. Years ago that would have messed me up, but now I felt nothing, not even empathy.

  “I was stupid.” She shook her head, closing her eyes briefly. “I was so stupid. I thought having nice things was so important that I was willing to do almost anything to get them.”

  Emma had always been what my brothers called a “high-maintenance woman.” She liked her regular salon and spa visits and treated shopping like an Olympic sport. She told me she’d inherited some money when her grandmother passed away, so I never really questioned how she could afford to live that lifestyle. Plus, I’d paid her a decent wage.

  “And?” I didn’t see what any of that had to do with her leaving.

  “I maxed out my credit cards. It got so bad I couldn’t even afford to pay my rent anymore.”