Lean on Me

by Candy Crum

  “Oh relax,” he said. “I was just joking.”

  “I figured you were. That was why you didn’t get a knee to the crotch,” she replied, carefully navigating the dark house.

  “Honestly, your leg probably would have just turned to dust at this point. Besides, I wouldn’t have anything to do with you in that way, anyway.” He let loose a shivering sound, like he narrowly missed an attack from a Buick-sized spider dangling from the ceiling over his head.

  “What?” she asked, clearly offended.

  “Well, yeah. I’m pretty sure you’re still grody and have cooties from when we were younger. I never saw a clean bill of health and that crap doesn’t go away easily. I need documentation.”

  She did well hiding the laugh that wanted to rise in her chest. She knew that he was trying to do what he always did in situations that made her uncomfortable. He was always willing to make himself look or sound like an idiot to make her feel better. It was true that he never had any romantic interest in her, and that she’d never had any for him, but in moments like this, she wished that she could find a guy very much like him that she could be romantically interested in.

  “What are you? Four?” He laughed at her comment as he followed closely behind. “Besides, I never showed you the clean bill of health because I didn’t want you pining over me and thinking there could ever be something.”

  “Oh! Well, in that case, thank you for saving me that treacherous fate. Surely I’d have died without your love, had I seen you were indeed cootie-free.” She could hear the smile in his voice, though she couldn’t see it.

  She laughed outright that time as they headed up the stairs. “Okay, seriously, we need to shut up and get this over before we get caught.”

  He didn’t respond, only followed her upstairs and to what had once been her room. Bri opened the door at the end of the hall, expecting to see at least some of her things inside. Instead, when she opened the door the stale scent of fresh paint overwhelmed her. It was like hitting an invisible barrier. She crossed the threshold and found the room completely empty with the cans of paint sitting about on long pieces of plastic that protected the floor. The room, once a dark shade of lavender, was now a boring cream color. Every piece of her furniture was gone and there wasn’t even any evidence that she’d ever lived there at all.

  “Dear God,” Matt mumbled as he walked into the room. “Who are these people?” Though she knew the question was rhetorical, she still wanted to answer that they were monsters. That she had no idea who they were or how they possibly could have produced her.

  Bri opened the closet and found it completely bare. She shook her head, a breath escaping her a little rougher than usual in shock. “I don’t understand this,” she said softly, her voice barely a whisper. Something occurred to her and she found her volume. “Maybe they just moved it to another room?”

  Matt opened his mouth to stop her, to remind her of something he’d shared with her once before. That her parents had sat a lot of things out by the curb throughout her stay in the hospital, but he stayed quiet. It was true that he didn’t think it had been all of her belongings, but obviously he’d missed some things.

  Bri tore out of the room and began frantically searching the other ones. She came up empty in every room, except her parents’. She found a large Nike bag that her parents had purchased for her at the beginning of the basketball season. It was clean of her practice supplies and was now full of her mother’s shoes. She thought it was a ridiculous place to put those and immediately dumped them out all over the closet floor, anger coursing through her. She didn’t bother to organize them or even shut the closet door before leaving the room with that bag.

  Matt followed in silence as Bri stomped through the house into the bathroom. She stocked the bag with shampoo, body wash, toothpaste and a fresh toothbrush. She had almost left before turning around to grab a couple rolls of toilet paper. With an angry smirk, she made a hasty retreat from the bathroom and headed toward the kitchen, a silent – and worried – Matt tagging along close behind.

  Once Bri had reached the kitchen, she began rifling through the cabinets for anything she might need or want. She thought back to the one hundred dollars she was left and sarcastically laughed to herself, knowing that her parents knew the value of a dollar and knew that was no real good start at all.

  She filled the bag with food and bottled water. She had no idea what kind of situation she was going to find herself in and she knew that she’d need food to make it. Her ribs ached terribly, but she did her best to ignore the pain as she slung the bag over her shoulder.

  Matt wanted to protest, but recognized the look of rage and defiance on her face. She’d have fought him on it, wasting more time. Once that was done, they made their way outside again, locking the door before they did.

  Bri silently handed the bag to Matt before making her way over to the large tree that shaded the back corner of the yard. It held a massive treehouse that had a staircase that spiraled around the tree.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, his voice a loud whisper.

  “I have to check one more thing,” she said as she made her way up.

  “Sure! Only half of your body is broken. Let’s go climbing into treehouses!” He said in that loud whisper again.

  “Oh hush! Just keep watch.”

  He did as he was asked, not questioning her. He wanted to allow her whatever this was, hoping it would help her put closure on her horrible family and move on. Once inside, she sighed in relief, tears now coming to her eyes. They hadn’t touched the tree house. It still held all of her things that she’d had up there before. She located the thing she’d actually come for – a large black backpack that had a few changes of clothes in it. She’d always kept a bag of clothes out there in case she decided to run away. Even at sixteen she still only thought to run no further than her tree house. Now she was being forced out on her own and she had no idea what she was going to do.

  In the corner of the tree house stood a bookcase. It was a modest sized shelf compared to the much larger and very beautiful book shelves inside the house. It was roughly three feet tall and four feet wide. But it wasn’t the size or the worn wood that it was made of that mattered to her. It was where she’d gotten it and the treasures that it held. When she was young, her maternal grandmother would read books to her from that very shelf. Over the years it had become worn and the stain badly needed to be refinished. When her grandmother passed, the shelf was left to Bri. Her father moved it into the tree house for her that very day and they sat for hours, talking as they stocked it full of Bri’s favorite tales.

  The weeks following that were magic to her. Every evening, about an hour before bed, her father would sneak her outside after dinner and into the tree house. She would sit beside him and they would take turns reading to one another. She remembered the laughs they shared then, back when she considered him a real dad, and she even remembered some of the tears they shared together when they would retreat there from some sadness that plagued them.

  Bri began to shake as the memories consumed her. A time that wasn’t so long ago seemed like a millennia had passed. She collapsed on the floor in the corner, clutching the backpack to her chest as she cried. The tears flowed freely and she worried she wouldn’t be able to stop them now that they’d started. She felt a gentle hand on her shoulder, Matt’s. She had been so occupied by her on thoughts that she hadn’t heard him come up as well.

  Without a word he tucked himself behind her, putting his knees on either side and pulling her back into his chest so he could hold her. She sobbed as he gently rocked her, whispering in her ear that everything would be okay. She squeezed his arm, immediately regretting the decision when the pain rang through her ribs and broken finger. The pain seized her, but she fought through it, feeling a greater need to have closeness to someone.

  It seemed to her that time had stopped. It seemed she’d been up there for an hour or more, when it had only been about ten minutes. Her
tears had finally stopped flowing and she was beginning to feel very fatigued.

  “We need to get out of here,” Matt said. “Your parents will be home any minute.”

  She nodded and allowed him to help her stand. Getting back to the truck was much slower, as she began to feel more and more of her pain. Her pain medication from the hospital had begun to wear off. Matt noticed the difference in her once they were back on the sidewalk and under the street lights.

  Bri’s reaction time was slow due to the dozen or so things running through her mind. She was hardly aware of him removing her backpack and putting it on himself before carefully lifting her bridal style to carry her and the two bags back to the truck. Once inside, she relaxed.

  “Hey, it’ll be okay, Bri. I promise. Life has ways of throwing things at you that are painful. Sometimes it’s overwhelmingly painful and it feels like you’ll die if you stop moving. But, if you think about it, those painful moments make the better ones in life sweeter. Each painful moment makes cherishing the good times infinitely easier.”

  Her eyes met his and she saw his sincerity. She thought about his words. It was something close to what she’d said to him when he’d lost Gabe. He wanted to die right along with him. Though they’d only had a few short years together, Matt loved him more like a son than a brother. She stuck by him and brought him back from the depression.

  She thought about her life now and what it would soon be like; how hard it would be. Then she thought about the moment all this pain would be worth it when the doctor placed her brand new baby in her arms. Matt was right. It was going to be hard, but she would spend the next few months getting her life in order and making a life for both of them. And when delivery came, her life would be complete.

  The engine starting pulled her from her thoughts. She hadn’t even noticed that he’d gotten in. “I’m not quitting school,” Bri said finally, having let several moments pass.

  Matt smiled. “I would have been shocked if you did. What about homeschooling?”

  “I don’t have the money for tuition and the cost of materials and their books. Plus, I’m not going to let Mike or my parents bully me.”

  He thought for a moment. “Bri, think about this. I can talk to my sister about it. You’d be safe and you’d be able to finish school at your own pace. It wouldn’t matter if you were sick or tired. You could also get a job if you wanted. And if tuition is what you’re really worried about, then don’t. I’ll pay for it. It’s worth it to keep you safe.”

  Bri immediately shook her head. “No, Matt. I’m not taking your money. I can’t do that.” She placed her hand on his for a moment, allowing his warmth to touch her before pulling it back. She felt more than warmth as her skin brushed his. She felt an unfamiliar tingle pass between them. She shook it off, finishing her thought. “I really appreciate it. Knowing that I have you makes all of this a little easier. But I can’t take your money.”

  He sighed. “Then come home with me tonight. I wish you’d just let me take care of you. You just got out of the hospital and you need a nice hot bath and some real food. My mom would love to make a dinner with you.”

  She thought for a moment. She didn’t like the idea of his parents finding out about her pregnancy, but he was right. She desperately wanted a bath and a real meal. “Okay, but just tonight.”

  Chapter 6

  Matt’s family welcomed her in just as they always had. His mother, Shaelyn, met Bri with warmth and concern. Bri’s eyes immediately filled with tears as she felt the comfort of Shaelyn’s love for her. It was something she had come to appreciate over the years, given that she never received as much from her own mother. Shaelyn sent Bri upstairs to get a warm bath and pulled Matt into the kitchen.

  “What’s going on? What the hell happened to my girl?” Shaelyn asked.

  Matt sighed. “That awesome boyfriend of hers. That’s what. He and his asshole buddies attacked her. I can’t even remember all the injuries, but she’s got multiple broken bones. She’s pushing through it though. She’s tough.”

  Shaelyn was visibly mortified. Her face reflected horror as her imagination ran away with her. “Did they…”

  Matt debated for a moment. He wondered if he should tell her yes, knowing that it would make the pregnancy easier to explain, but he decided against it. Deciding that it was a horrible thing to lie about, even if he believed it to be partly true due to Mike’s pressuring her in the first place.

  “No. There was no sexual assault, only battery. She quit the basketball team and started being her own person for once and I guess he didn’t much care for it.”

  She stared at her son. “That’s all it was? I get the feeling there is a bit more going on here. You can talk to me. You know that. I’m always going to be here for you, and for her, too. My kids are my life. Even if they are less than legally adopted.”

  As Matt looked into his mother’s eyes, he could see absolute truth. She loved him more than anything in the world. And he knew without a doubt that she loved Bri just as much. He wanted so much to tell her the full story, but he couldn’t betray Bri’s trust, though he couldn’t betray his mother’s either.

  “Look, there are things that I feel are not my place to talk about. If you want to know, ask Bri, but wait a bit. She has been through a lot and I don’t think she can handle reliving it all at the moment. But I’m going to take care of her. I promise.”

  Shaelyn smiled and reached for her son’s hand. “I know you will. It’s why I love you. You are dependable and a strong man. I won’t talk to her yet and I won’t pressure you either. But I will be here when you are both ready.”

  Matt leaned down and kissed the top of his mother’s head before walking away. She sighed and shook her head, wondering what they’d gotten themselves into.

  Bri finished dressing and putting her hair up in a towel. She was relieved to have a real shower after leaving the hospital, even if it was excruciatingly painful. She brushed her teeth and went to work making herself presentable. Well, as presentable as she could manage with a broken body. She was in a lot of pain, but she refused to allow it to bother her.

  Before leaving the bathroom, Bri lifted her shirt and examined her bruised belly. She could see the tiny bump forming from within her abdomen and it made her smile. She rubbed it gently, imagining the day when she could rub the soft peach fuzz atop her newborn’s head instead of her own body.

  She gave a content sigh, still grateful that her baby was safe inside her womb. She turned and exited the bathroom, headed for the kitchen. When she arrived, a large plate full of lasagna, salad, and garlic bread awaited her. Her stomach grumbled with the smell of the food and she was all too happy to sit and have a real meal.

  “It’s still your favorite, isn’t it?” Jacqueline asked.

  Bri smiled. “Oh, yes. I never much cared for it until I had it over here.” She didn’t mention that she made lasagna every chance she got. It was certainly her favorite.

  “That’s because your mother couldn’t cook worth a damn. That’s why you had me, love,” Shaelyn said, smiling.

  Jacqueline’s bright eyes stared Bri down, taking in every scrape, cut, and bruise. Her heart ached, wondering why Mike had done such a thing. He’d been a bit of a womanizer, but he’d never seemed like the violent type. Jacqueline had always thought of Bri as more of a sister than just her brother’s friend. She’d always secretly thought they would end up together, Shaelyn too. Both women still couldn’t figure out why it hadn’t yet happened, but settled for their intensely close friendship.

  Bri felt Jacqueline’s gaze burning her. She looked up and met her friend with a warm smile. “It looks worse than it is,” she said, attempting to calm her worries.

  “No it isn’t,” Matt said flatly. He stared down into his plate, pushing some of his salad around with a fork. His comment was absentminded, caused by a lack of filter due to his racing thoughts. He was worried for her and desperately wanted to help, though he knew she would only turn down his offer
s.

  Bri’s eyes met Matt’s as she sent him a warning glare. He looked back down into his plate. “I’m okay. Really,” Bri told Jacqueline with another forced smile.

  The rest of dinner was quiet. Matt seemed to relax the longer he was around his family and Bri began to feel more at home. Shaelyn and Jacqueline moved to the living room and left Matt to clear the dishes, since they had made dinner. Bri stayed behind. She stood and picked up her plate and Matt quickly took it from her.

  “Excuse me Hop Along,” he said, quietly enjoying the narrowed eyes she stared him down with. “That’s my job. You wouldn’t want to put me out of work, now would you?”

  “I need to do something. I’m used to doing everything. And now here I am, everything being done for me. You have already done enough for me. Maid service is not part of the job description.”

  Matt sat the stack of plates down on the table and stepped forward, only a few inches between them. He put his fingers under her chin and gently lifted. His thumb ran across her chin just under her lips, a touch so soft she barely felt it. Her breath caught in her chest and she wasn’t sure why. She imagined it was just the shock of such intimate contact without lecherous intent.

  “My job description is not for you to decide. You happen to be a martyr. You’ll let yourself burn to spare another an ounce of discomfort. Well, I’m a strong boy. I can take it.”

  He allowed his thumb to wander across her chin once more before stepping away, grabbing the dishes and moving to the kitchen. She let out a deep breath, one she didn’t realize she’d been holding. She felt a little light headed. She picked a place on the floor and locked her eyes on it to try to regain focus. Matt soon finished loading the dishwasher and returned back to the dining room to find Bri staring at the floor.

  “Bri? Are you okay?”

  The sound of his voice brought her back around, calming her suddenly cluttered mind. “Yes! Yes, I’m fine. I’m sorry. I just got a little dizzy.”