Finding Memories (Breaking Free Series)

by Becca Taylor

  I look for something, anything to tell me she’s not being honest, but her eyes don’t waver.

  “What happens tomorrow? Or when you sober up and realize you made a big mistake?” I ask.

  “Tomorrow, we go back to being friends. I know this isn’t something I would normally do, and I might be intoxicated but not enough to not know what I’m doing. I can recite the alphabet and walk backward while touching my fingers to my nose.” If she’s trying to be funny, it’s working. But I can’t laugh. This is not a laughing matter because I’m actually considering it.

  “If you were any other woman, I would say yes. You’re not just any woman, though, Jade. Can you honestly say it’s just tonight when we will still see each other every day?”

  “Yes. I’ll go back to my online man search, and you go back to however you look for a date.” Her hands lower into the back of my pants, and I’m hanging by a thread. I’m going to give into temptation.

  “Tonight,” I say in agreement.

  “Tonight,” she whispers right back as she goes to raise her mouth to mine again.

  “I can’t promise I’ll be gentle.” If I give her gentle, that’s me caring too much. Control.

  “I didn’t say I want gentle. I just want to remember what’s it’s like to feel satisfied. Can you do that? Satisfy me?”

  I don’t even answer her. In less than thirty seconds, I make it to bathroom and back. I toss the condoms next to her on the bed.

  “Anytime you say the word; this stops,” I tell her.

  “What if I say don’t stop?”

  “I guess you’ll have to wait and see what happens then.”

  As I hover above her, she chews on her lip the same time her breathing speeds up. It only reminds me of the kiss, and the way she was nibbling on my lips. In my sweats, my cock is standing at full attention, hard as a rock and begging to break free. I don’t waste any more time; that would only give me time to think about how this is still a fucking bad idea. Instead, I let my body take over and tell my thoughts to go to hell.

  In one quick movement, I remove my shirt from her body. I knew her body would be phenomenal, but I wasn’t expecting perfection. With my hands, I study every inch of her tanned and flawless skin. As I take each of her full breasts in my hands and begin to massage them, a tiny moan escapes her. Each time I pinch her dark pink nipples between my thumb and forefinger, her back arches off the bed, and it makes me want to do this all night just to watch her react to my touch. Instead of making my way down her hot body, I move my hands higher. For a moment, I cup her throat in my hand. While looking at her, I rub my thumb up and down the soft skin on her neck. I pause on her pulse and wait for her reaction. When she tilts her head back, I take it as a yes, she likes it, and that she trusts me not to hurt her. And I never would. When I add a little pressure, she breathes out the word, “Yes.”

  Slowly, I begin to kiss up to the base of her neck. Instantly, her legs wrap around my thighs and her fingers dig into my sides. I suck the tender spot just below her ear; enough to get a reaction, but not too much that it will leave my mark. This time, her nails sink into my skin hard, and I know I’ll definitely be wearing her mark tomorrow. Fuck, that’s hot. With a twist of my wrist, I turn her head to the side.

  Her eyes are closed while her lips part and her chest rises with quick pants. I lower to her ear again and whisper, “Do you want to tell me what you want me to do your body, or do you want me to tell you what I want to do? Because your body gives me a lot of ideas.”

  “You,” she pants.

  I smile as I think of all the dirty things I want to do. Maybe it’s the alcohol or the fact I haven’t been with anyone since Deanna, but this feels different. Normally, I would consider myself more of a lover because I like to take things slow. The problem with that word is the four letters before the r; love has nothing to do with what we are about to do here. This is two people needing a release, two animals purely fucking for pleasure, and I’m about to pleasure every inch of her. Maybe more than once. Scratch that—definitely more than once.

  “First, I’m going to suck on those beautiful nipples of yours. I’m going to take them between my teeth and tease them with my tongue until you are begging me to stop. This is the one time I won’t listen to you. I know you’re only asking me to stop because you want more. Don’t worry, though; I’ll give you more.”

  The more I talk, the tighter her legs wrap around me.

  “Next, my hand is going to sneak under that sexy as fuck white lace thong of yours. The question is, are you going to be wet when I slide my fingers between the lips of your beautiful pussy? I don’t even have to see your pussy to know it’s beautiful. And I’m guessing the answer is yes, you’ll be soaked for me.”

  “Oh, God, yes. I’m already wet.”

  Fuck, this is turning me on just as much as it is her. Not that I’m a quiet guy, far from it, but I’ve never done the whole dirty talk during sex. From now on, I’ll be doing it all the time. Especially if the woman responds like Jade.

  “I’m not going to let you come just yet. You’re still not naked. Soon, you will be. I hope those panties aren’t too expensive because if they are, you’re going to hate me when I tear them from your body. But don’t worry, you’ll forget all about it when I am taking you in my mouth. And I’ll have my face buried between your legs for a while. You’ll be pushing me away and pulling me closer at the same time, begging me to stop and don’t stop in the same breath. After you’ve recovered from your first orgasm—that’s right, I said first—I’m going to immediately give you a second one with my fingers and mouth working together. Will you be satisfied with just that? Will you want me to stop then, Jade?”

  I wait for her answer as I nibble on the lobe of her ear.

  Over the fabric of my sweats, she starts to move against me. “No. I want more. I need this.”

  “Don’t worry, baby. You’ll get all nine inches of me.” Her eyes go wide.

  I take her hand in mine and place it over my sweats to let her know I’m telling the truth. With a firm grip, she rubs my cock, and as much as I want her to keep going, I’m a man of my word. I do everything I said I would and more.

  When she’s still coming down from her second orgasm, I pull off my sweats. I wait for her to say no more, but she doesn’t. Instead, she grabs the condom beside her and hands it to me. Once I’m fully sheathed, I bury myself deep inside her in one fast, hard thrust. Fuck.

  At first, I move slowly. She wasn’t lying when she said it'd been a while; she’s so fucking tight. And wet isn’t even the way I would describe her. She’s so soaked from the two orgasms that I easily slide in and out of her. I wish I could bottle up this feeling because I’d be a goddamn millionaire.

  “Harder, Jeremy. I won’t break. Please, make me come again.”

  All thoughts of being gentle vanish. I pull out of her warmth long enough to flip her over and enter her from behind. With each roll of my hips, she takes me in a little more until I’m all the way in. Her back arches, and her inner walls tighten around me. It’s heaven and hell at the same time. Heaven because if I die right now, I’ll die a happy man, and hell because I know it’s just this once.

  She’s so fucking tight around me I won’t be able to hold on for long. With one hand, I grasp her throat again, lifting her so her back is touching my front. My other hand reaches around her front. “I’m going to come, Jade. And when I do, I want you to come again.”

  My fingers slide between her lips, working her clit while I move in and out of her from behind. When her pussy contracts around me, that’s her response to my demand, and I lose it. Her hand reaches up, wrapping around my head to pull my lips to hers. It probably wasn’t the best idea, kissing her while both our orgasms hit us simultaneously. That’s too much of a connection, but fuck, it felt good to feel wanted again.

  We both collapse on the bed, fighting for air. There is no cuddling, though. She didn’t even try to, and neither did I.

  “Jeremy
.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Thank you. That was amazing, but promise me, nothing changes between us. Friends, right?”

  “Nothing will change, Jade.”

  “Pinky swear?” She was too tired to raise her finger this time.

  “Pinky swear. And for the record, it was fucking amazing.”

  “Yeah, it was. Night, Superman.”

  “Night, Foxy.”

  It was just sex. No-strings-attached sex. Phenomenal no-strings-attached sex. And I wonder if I can get her to agree to it again. I’m a goddamn motherfucking idiot.

  “YOU DID WHAT?”

  The phone drops from my ear when Lexi screams at me. Thankfully, the screen didn't crack when it hit the tile floor. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to repeat what I said, but I do anyway.

  “I had sex with Jeremy.”

  “Well, you little tramp. If I still lived above you, I would run down the stairs and high five you.”

  Lexi has been my best friend for years. Even though I have four best friends, I've known her the longest, and I trust her the most with this tidbit of information. Not necessarily trust to keep a secret, but to understand. Before she got together with Hunter, hooking up with a guy wasn't uncommon for her. All my friends have settled down, and it seems it's my time to have some fun.

  Speaking of which, Hunter is in the background. “About fucking time he got laid. He's been a pain in the ass to work with.”

  “Am I on speaker?” I ask Lexi.

  “Oops. Everyone's going to find out soon enough when they see you two together.”

  “We aren't together.”

  “You dog,” Hunter chides.

  “My God. Take me off speaker. And Hunter, please don't say anything.” Hunter is like a brother to me. All my friends’ significant others are. Plus, he is the guy equivalent of best friends with Jeremy, and I don't feel like being the hot topic of their conversation.

  “My lips are sealed, but I may have to fuck with him a little. If he walks in wearing a smile today at the construction site, I'll know why.”

  I should have kept my mouth shut. This should have stayed between Jeremy and me. But I need advice, and Lexi is the one who will have answers for me.

  “I’ll call you back when you can talk in private,” I tell her.

  “I’m going,” Hunter says to me. I hear them say bye, which takes a while.

  “Okay, talk. How did this happen?” Lexi says once her attention turns back to me. The one who needs her.

  I didn’t tell her everything. Just that we were at the same place at the same time and had a little too much to drink. I told her about the hotel room we shared, and that things just happened. We were both lonely.

  “Have you seen him since?”

  “No, but I will tomorrow. Tell me it won’t be awkward,” I beg.

  “It most definitely will be awkward. You just have to lay it out there, though, and once you discuss it, you’ll feel better. Do you want it to be more?”

  I think about that, and my answer is still no. It was hot, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not ready to put my heart on the line. “No. It was just a one-time thing.”

  Then I finally break down and tell her about me doing the whole internet dating game, which, of course, she is against. She believes going out and mingling is much better than meeting some creep online. Her words, not mine.

  “Was he worth a repeat?”

  “Jeez, Lexi. Do I have to answer you?”

  “Yes, you totally have to. You’ve heard all about my and the girls’ sex life. It’s only fair.” She’s referring to our best friends Kat, Aly, and Dani. On one of our weekend girls’ only retreats, everyone got a little personal.

  “Yes. But it can’t happen again.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s Jeremy, and we are just friends.”

  “Who’s to say it has to be more than that? Sex is what it is—sex. There’s a difference when you find the one. When I found Hunter, I knew no man could compare to him. Unless it was like that for you.”

  I think about it, but I clear my head of those thoughts quickly. If I put too much thought into it, I’m afraid of what my answer would be. “I’m going to say it was just really good sex.”

  “Okay then it doesn’t have to be awkward. Unless …” She stops talking midsentence, and I freak out.

  “Will you stop doing that pause thing. You’re killing me,” I yell at her. I’m five minutes away from a breakdown—not the crying kind, but the kind that will have me go back to the gallon of ice cream and wine.

  “Sorry. Unless it meant more to him.”

  The next morning with Jeremy, things felt fine. We got up, dressed, and even had breakfast together downstairs. That was it. “You are supposed to be helping me, not make me feel worse.”

  “Right. Well, we know he just got out of a relationship, so I doubt he wants anything serious right now.”

  “Better.”

  “My advice is not to think about it. Let him approach you. Just act casual about the whole thing.”

  “Got it. Casual. And how do I do that?”

  “Or you could do the opposite?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  I mull over her next suggestion with a pint of chocolate chip mint ice cream.

  I’VE GOT THIS. It happens all the time. It was just great sex—sex I wouldn’t mind having again, over and over again, if I’m quite honest.

  These thoughts run through my head as I near the construction site the next morning. Ready to face this head-on, I get out of my car. Today, they are putting the first nail in the new structure, and I’m not to miss it. Or so I was told.

  “Hey, Fox,” one of the guys, Blake, from the construction company yells to me.

  I wave hello to everyone. They’ve all made it their job to play big brother to me. It didn’t take long for them to feel comfortable with me being here and snapping pictures of them all day as they tried to act for the camera. I told them I wasn’t looking for them to pose, and the whole idea is to get natural shots of them. They still like to pose, but at least now when I walk around with my camera, they actually work.

  “Foxy.” I turn to look over my shoulder as I was about to take some pictures of the construction crew setting up, and Jeremy is waving me into his office. It’s not an office per se; there really isn’t an office here yet. He’s getting a mobile one this week, but for now, the hood of his truck is perfect for holding his plans.

  “Confident” by Demi Lovato is playing in my head as my new anthem. Yep, I totally got this.

  “Yeah, boss.” That sounded casual.

  “I picked this up for you. Now that you are going to be on the property, you need to wear it at all times.” Jeremy places a pink hard hat on my head.

  “Morning. And, wow, I don’t have to go stand in the circle of spray paint once you start working.”

  “It was for your own good.”

  “It was to prove a point.”

  “I don’t have anything to prove.”

  “Only to make sure I would listen,” I joke.

  “Damn straight,” he says, standing with his legs wide and hands on his hips.

  “Thanks for the gift, Superman.” Which is exactly who he looks like standing like that.

  “I have one more thing.” He walks away to open his truck door. I thought it would be one of those awkward, let's avoid each other moments, but it’s not. When he comes back, he’s carrying two coffee cups. “Morning. Vanilla latte with almond milk, right?”

  I take a sip, and it’s made exactly how I like it. “You are officially my hero.”

  “I graduated from savior to hero? Ready to erect a building?”

  I almost spit my coffee out of both my mouth and my nose.

  “Get your mind out of the gutter, Foxy.”

  “You said it, not me. But I’m erection ready, boss.” I even give a little salute and pretend I didn’t say that, but Jeremy is shaking his head, laughing at me. There
was no maybe we should talk, and I even made it the entire day without thinking about that night. Until later, at least.

  Taking pictures kept me busy and my mind off what I plan to do later. I even manage some great shots, and my day here is done. Until I need to talk to Jeremy.

  “Are you free to talk?” I ask him.

  He’s putting the last of his tools in the back of his truck. I don’t always stay this late, but my boss insisted I take a bunch of pictures too. In a matter of a few hours, a shell of a brand-new concrete building stands where there once was rubble. I can see why after today, I will only be here for key moments. Like tomorrow, they have to wait for an inspection, so I’m not needed. Plus, they realized people would get bored watching cement dry, literally. That and you can only take so many pictures of men hammering.

  “Sure, what’s up?”

  “Maybe we could go for coffee?”

  Jeremy looks at his watch. “At seven in the evening? I’m okay, but you aren’t a night coffee person.”

  “Okay, not coffee for me. I do like herbal tea, though, and the coffee shop has that. Do you like herbal tea?”

  “What?” He laughs.

  “Let’s go.” He takes pity on me because I don’t think he goes home at night and thinks, I’d like an herbal tea. Instead, he opens his truck door, gesturing for me to get in.

  “I’ll take my car.” That’s much safer. Yes, friends. It also gives me time to blast some woman power music for the ten-minute drive to the coffee house.

  Jeremy parks beside me and opens my car door to help me out. Once inside, he heads to the counter to get our order while I pick a quiet table in the corner. There’s no need for anyone to hear that I’m a wanton hussy. How am I even going to broach this subject with him? He’s going to think I’m a crazy person, and since I just said that all out loud and not in my head like I intended, everyone is looking at me like I’m nuts.

  Jeremy sits down and immediately starts talking. “Is this about the other night?”