The Way We Were (Solitary Soldiers Book 2)
Page 8
November 1st 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
All safe and sound. I like beer.
November 1st 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
And vodka.
November 1st 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
And rum.
November 1st 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
I miss you. I wish you were here now so I could fuck you. I miss fucking you. I like fucking you. Fucking you is fun. I just said fucking a lot. A chick in a sexy nurse costume hit on me tonight. I said no. I told her I’m getting married to you and she offered me sex. Just like that she offered to take me to the bathroom and suck my dick. I said no, even when she said I could fuck her ass if I wanted to. That’s how much I love you. I said no to sex with a hot chick. Words are hard when you like beer and vodka and rum and whatever else was in that stuff Jeffries gave me. I like Jeffries. He’s a fun dude. You’d like him. He gets all the girls. He’s a player. I used to be a player. I still would be, but I love you. No more hot chicks for me. Jeffries can have them all. I have my Allie Cat. All I need.
November 2nd 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
Seriously? Drunk calling me at 3am wasn’t enough you had to send me those emails? I don’t even know what to think. Don’t call me for a few days. I’m angry at you. I need time to cool off and I have a lot of work to do.
November 17th 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
I called and your mom picked up again. You really need your own line. I know, I’m not happy about the posting either but what can I do? It’s where they need me so I have to go. And to answer the angry questions you dropped on me last night but never let me answer—yes, I put in for bases closer to you but they had no spots open—no, I’m not happy to be moving across the country but I really have no choice —no, I didn’t ask for a field unit, it’s where they put me.
Look, I get that you’re upset, I am too, but we need to talk about this. I’ll call you tomorrow, love you even though I’m a little pissed at the way you talked to me last night.
November 21st 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
I’m home now babe, call me, please. Your grad is tomorrow and I want to talk to you before you leave, again. Hopefully you’ll have some sort of answering machine or voicemail so I don’t have to keep emailing you every time we miss each other. Love you.
December 2nd 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
I really need to talk to you about something, please call me. I left you a dozen messages but you’re not answering. You didn’t say you were going to the field…whatever, just please call me.
December 3rd 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
Please call me Ben. I’m about to freak out. I’ve filled your voicemail and you’re not answering. I haven’t heard from you in four days. I’m half a step away from calling your parents to see if they know where the hell you are, but I don’t want to freak them out.
December 4th 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
Little pissed at you so I’m going to write this down instead of talking to you. I get that things are stressful for you and sometimes you don’t want to talk, but hiding and just not calling me back while you go to the bar with the guys and get drunk every night is not how you handle things. Just email me and tell me you can’t talk for a few days, that way I’m not freaking out and wondering if you’re hurt or dead or worse.
Things aren’t all perfect here either. School is crazy and I’m working so many hours I feel like I have no time for anything else. Mom and Dad are driving me nuts. I had to call the cops last night because Mom was throwing cutlery at Dad and she started throwing knives. Knives! She hit him with a few and he was bleeding and she started freaking. Then he started yelling and she started screaming and yeah, I called the cops.
Do you still love me? I feel like I never hear from you, and if I do it’s only for a few minutes and you’re distracted. If something’s going on then tell me, just let me know and I’ll back off. If you’re already changing your mind then tell me so. I love you Ben, but I don’t know you right now.
December 12th 2002
To: Allie
From: Ben
I’ve been trying to figure out a way to say this over the phone, but maybe reading it will be easier on you. I’m not coming home for Christmas. I didn’t get my leave approved and we’re not getting enough time off to justify a trip home. I’ll only have three days and then I’m pulling duty so my schedule will be all over the place. I’m sorry, I know we were planning on spending Christmas together but I’ll be stuck here. New Year’s Eve doesn’t look great either, but some of the guys are having their girlfriends come up for the holidays, maybe you could come here for a weekend? I have enough for your ticket, but even with the accommodations here I can’t commit to too long because I won’t have the time off. Think about it, three days is better than none, right? Love you, call me tomorrow when you get home, I’ll be here.
December 19th 2002
To: Ben
From: Allie
Can’t wait to see you tomorrow baby, I’m so excited! I wish it was longer than three days, but considering I haven’t had more than five hours with you since July I’ll take it! Still pissed you’re not getting Christmas off or enough time to come home but you’re right, it’s better than nothing. Six months have never seemed so long. I miss you so much. I bought a few things I think you might like, hopefully you don’t plan on leaving the room too much. Love you, can’t wait to see you.
Chapter Nine
December 2002
Allie had never been on a plane before and she was terrified the entire flight. Her ears had popped and her stomach had felt like it was dropping right out of her body as they’d landed, and she’d almost passed out when they’d hit turbulence.
She wasn’t a fan of flying, that was for sure. As she walked out of the arrivals gate she saw Ben standing there in the front of the crowd with a small bouquet of roses in his hand and a smile on his face, and she’d felt so much it had been overwhelming.
She ran right into his arms, and he scooped her up and swung her around as he hugged her so tight she felt her ribs crack. She just clung to him as he held her and let the tears flow down her cheeks. Her heart felt like it was swelling and she might burst she was so happy.
“I missed you so much,” she whispered in his ear as he hugged her.
“God I missed you, Allie.” He pulled away so he could look into her eyes. “I missed you so much.”
His kiss was crushing and hard, and she kissed him back. She vaguely remembered they were in public, but she honestly didn’t care. After a long moment he pulled away from her, and smiled as he looked her up and down.
Allie stared at him as he studied her. She had to admit the short haircut was a little strange on him. He looked amazing but she wasn’t used to it. Ever since they were kids he’d always worn his hair on the longer side, and his new look was cleaner and made him look older. He was still in the same shape as he’d been after basic training so he was harder and more muscular, but everything else was the same. He was still her Ben.
They stared at each other, almost lost in a spell, then Allie was bumped from behind and they were brought back into reality.
“Did you check a bag?” he asked as he took her hand in his and handed her the flowers.
“I did.” She nodded. “I didn’t actually realize you can take those tiny suitcases on the plane with you so I checked it.”
He grinned. “Well, now we know for your flight home.”
“Thanks for the flowers.” She smiled as he led her to the baggage claim.
It didn’t take long to get her bag, and he took her coat from her as he started to lead her to the parking garage. It was a lot w
armer here than back home, her sweater would be warm enough.
“So this is your new car.” She grinned as she settled into the front seat.
“The very one.” He nodded as he slid into the car with her. “It’s not fancy but it gets me from A to B.”
“You’re such a grown up.” She laughed as he started the car.
“What do you mean?” He pulled the parking ticket out from the visor and headed toward the exit.
“Just last week I was freaking out about my exams and final papers, and here you are with your own car and bills and all that other adult crap.”
“Yeah, I guess if you look at it that way I kind of am.” He grinned. “Although to be fair the bills for my room and meal plan come out of my pay so I don’t really pay them, they just get paid.”
“So it’s more like you’re in college.” She laughed. “Like you live in a dorm and you go to the meal hall.”
“Only I don’t have to worry about finals or exams, and I’m getting paid,” he teased.
“Yeah, and you don’t have to pour coffee all day, or make it.” She paused as they made it to the exit and waited while he paid.
“Job still suck?”
“I like my boss. Marla is great and I don’t hate the work, I just hate the customers.”
“You never were a people person.”
“Still not. People suck.”
“All people?” he asked teasingly.
“No, not all people,” she conceded. “Your mom made me bring your Christmas presents so I don’t have a lot of clothes in my bag. Not a lot of things I can wear outside that is.”
Ben groaned and glanced over at her. She was looking him up and down and licking her lip. The look in her eyes was pure heat and hunger, something he’d never seen in her before, and he shifted as he got hard.
“You keep looking at me like that and I’m going to pull over and toss you into the backseat so I can fuck you senseless,” he said in a low voice as he looked back at the road.
Even as he was saying the words he had to remind himself why they had to wait until they got into some sort of room.
He still couldn’t believe she was really there. He’d only gotten off work an hour before her flight had landed, and he was grateful his Sergeant had worked it so he could have the afternoon off to meet her.
She was still his perfect Allie, but there was something different about her. She had a confidence she hadn’t had before, and he loved how she was teasing him back. Before he’d left they’d experimented a lot. She’d always been happy and willing to try whatever he suggested, and she’d enjoyed a lot of it, but she’d never taken the initiative and shown him how much she wanted him.
Even when they’d be on the phone and he’d try to start some dirty talk she’d kind of giggle and listen to him. He’d hoped they could figure out a way to have phone sex, but it had been way outside Allie’s comfort zone. Maybe that would change.
“Hmmmm. Promise?” she asked coquettishly.
He groaned again and tried not to speed as he drove down the street. It was a good half an hour to the base, and he wanted her so badly he felt like he was going to burst.
“So it’s been in for a few months now,” she said after a moment.
“And?”
“It’s all good. We don’t have to use condoms.”
She’d had an IUD put in back in October in anticipation of seeing him at Christmas. It had been ridiculously expensive, but her student health plan had covered a small portion of it and he’d paid the rest out of his wages.
He grinned and reached out to take her hand in one of his. He didn’t mind wearing protection if it would keep her from getting pregnant, but she’d told him she wanted to get one for other reasons he didn’t quite understand. Something about lightening her flow and stopping cramps, and the bonus would be that she wouldn’t need any other kind of birth control.
When she’d told him how much it was he’d been shocked. It was way more than she could afford, so he’d sent her the money for it without even thinking. It was for her health, and they didn’t have to worry about her getting pregnant.
They’d talked about having kids a few times and they both wanted to be parents, but they’d agreed they didn’t want them for a while. He wanted Allie to get her education and get established in her own career before they started, and he was selfish. He wanted some time with just her since they would be apart for so long. They’d decided they would look at getting married when they were twenty-five, and maybe have kids at around twenty-eight. It gave them lots of time to work on their careers, and to enjoy their lives together without rushing into parenthood before they were ready.
They might have found each other young, he might have proposed to her at eighteen, but it was the promise he’d wanted to give her. He’d wanted to show her how much he loved her and how much he wanted to be with her, and to promise that he wanted her forever.
With a smile he tilted her hand so he could see her ring and grinned as it caught the light and sparkled gently. He’d also had a slightly selfish reason for proposing. By putting his ring on her it would show the world she was taken. It might not keep the guys away from her, but it would show them her heart belonged to him.
* * * * *
The drive to the base was long and there wasn’t much to look at, but Allie was just happy to sit and hold Ben’s hand.
She’d missed him so much over the past six months. Only talking on the phone and emailing when she was used to seeing him every day had been hard. Plus they’d had a few rough patches where they weren’t communicating very well, and one or both of them would get angry or get their feelings hurt.
She’d had to deal with some issues at home with her parents and she’d missed being able to go over to his house and hide out and talk with him. She also felt like neither of them had enough time.
She was going to school full time, commuting two hours a day, and she was working nearly full time hours at her job. Add homework and the occasional social thing and she felt like there weren’t enough hours in the day.
He was so busy with work and duty and going into the field his schedule was even more erratic than hers, and he still needed to go out on the weekends or his off days so he could decompress.
They’d gone days without being able to talk, and a quick email here and there didn’t go too far when she was feeling overwhelmed and needed to talk to her best friend.
It had been a rough six months, but she was with him now and that’s what she was going to focus on. She didn’t want to sour the weekend by being angry at the past.
When they got to the base it was as if they entered a different world. He’d had to show his ID at a gate that was guarded by an actual armed guard. Then he’d driven through the many streets and buildings, and after about three turns she was lost.
He drove her up to a square building that seemed to have five floors and parked in the lot. He grabbed her bag out of the back, leaving her coat in the car, and took her hand as he led her into the building.
She wasn’t sure what she’d expected, but a small sitting area with chairs and books, a couple of vending machines, a desk with an older and slightly bored looking man in uniform, and elevators right in front of the doors wasn’t it. It looked like the bottom floor of a dorm, just with a guy in uniform at the desk instead of a student.
“We’re on the fifth floor,” Ben said as he nodded to the man at the desk and led her to the elevator.
When they stepped out onto the fifth floor and she looked around. It looked like a dorm hallway.
“What?” he asked as he pulled her down the hall, digging a key card out of his pocket as he did.
“It looks like a dorm.”
“What did you expect it to look like?” he asked with a grin as he stopped in front of a door and swiped the card.
“I don’t know, more military.”
“And what does military look like?”
“I don’t know. Camo, those mesh things
they put over things to cover them, at least lots of green.” She grinned.
He laughed and pulled her into the room. As soon as the door closed she didn’t even have a chance to look around. He dropped her bag and swept her into his arms as he pressed her against the door.
She gasped when she felt his hands running over her body, and a moment later his lips were on hers in a crushing kiss. She moaned against his lips when he pressed his pelvis against her so she could feel how hard and ready he was.
“Ben.” She gasped as she pulled away from his kiss so she could look up at him. “I want you, right now.”
He reached down and picked her up by the backs of her thighs, pulling her legs so they wrapped around his waist as he lifted her. He sealed his mouth over hers and carried her over to the bed as he kissed her. The moment his knees hit the side of the mattress he crawled up on the bed, and lay her down as he pressed his body over hers.
Their hands fumbled as they rushed to strip off their clothes. As soon as they were naked she grabbed him and pulled him down on top of her.
“Now, Ben. Please.” She begged when he reached down and slid his fingers over her. “I’m ready for you.”
The moment she felt him push inside her it wasn’t so much the physical feelings as the emotional connection that hit her. It felt wonderful to have his hard body over hers, his lips against hers and to feel him inside her, but it was the love she felt for him and the anticipation of the moment that was almost overwhelming.
“Fuck, Allie. I can’t. I—” He came on the very next thrust and jerked against her as he cried out.