Downfall

by Jay Crownover

  When I first started working here, it was because the Boss knew Gus. I’d stopped by to pay my respects when the old man passed and the new owner immediately saw something familiar when we met. He told me it was easy to spot trouble waiting for me, and if I wasn’t careful, bad decisions were going to get away from me. I flatly informed him I was way too busy and had far too much responsibility for any kind of trouble, and he had laughed at me. He informed me trouble would find me even if I wasn’t looking for it. I had no interest in putting my hands on stolen cars, no matter how beautiful and luxurious they might be. I wasn’t licensed or trained professionally, so he couldn’t put me in the front garage, not with the way the law in this town kept their eyes on him. And if I landed in jail, my mom would have no one, which was a risk I wasn’t willing to take. When he offered me a job, I politely turned him down, expecting a fist in the face as I did so.

  To my surprise, the Boss was completely understanding, even sympathetic, to my situation. Instead of putting me under the hood of a stolen sports car, he offered me a chance to show him what I could do by rebuilding a thoroughly battered Ford Coupe. Gus loved old rat-rods and hot rods. The property was littered with unfinished projects. It was a treasure trove of untapped potential the Boss couldn’t do much with on his own, considering his other obligations. He told me if I could get the Ford up and running within the month, he would let me sell it and split the profit with me sixty-forty. It was an opportunity too good to pass up.

  I finished the car and sold it for twice what we were asking for. The following month the boss handed me a rusted, patchworked Chevelle and we repeated the process. That restoration took a little over two months, and once it sold, I had enough money to enroll in some online classes. I wanted to be a legit mechanic. I wanted to know how to fix anything and everything that came my way, from the oldest and simplest cars to the high-end, luxury models. I wanted a job that would never be obsolete. I had to have a way to support myself and my mom no matter how often the world ended up on fire around me. I was still working my way through the junkyard, finding hidden jewels and turning them into custom rides. The Boss let me have free rein; the arrangement put money in both of our pockets and kept my hands clean.

  The Boss offered to pay my way through school as long as I agreed to go work for him on the legit side of things when I was done with my classes. I turned him down. I’d been around long enough to know it was never a good idea to end up indebted to the kind of man who built his business on blood and broken bones. I did, however, take him up on his offer to train me to fight when he found out I had a knack for tossing a punch and dodging fists. The money was impossible to pass up and the Boss was a good teacher. A broken nose and a dislocated shoulder were nothing as long as I had money in the bank and a way to take care of my mom.

  I pulled Orley’s junky car into my reserved bay. I parked it next to the Barracuda I was currently working on and glanced into the back to see if Noble was still asleep. Blurry blue eyes met mine in the mirror and I couldn’t fight the smile pulling at my lips. The little girl really was adorable, full of light and life. Her smile was infectious.

  “There’s an apartment upstairs you can take Noble up to and wait while I give the car a once over. It should only take me an hour or so.” I made sure my tone left no room for argument. She didn’t need to be wandering around the shop floor. I trusted most of the guys the Boss handpicked to work here with my life, but not with hers. There was something about her wide-eyed innocence and trembling fear that called to every single protective instinct I had.

  She delicately cleared her throat and I watched out of the corner of my eye as she fiddled nervously with the ends of her hair. I never really considered myself a fan of redheads. I wasn’t opposed to them, but if I had a type, it definitely wasn’t the fiery-haired, pale variety. I was drawn to flashy women who went out of their way to grab my attention, not timid females trying to hide from everything and everyone. I tended to go for chicks who knew the score. Girls who were in the same game and didn’t complain about it being played dirty or unfair. I liked quick and easy, because it was all I had room for in my life. None of which explained why I was inexplicably drawn to the woman sitting next to me. She was everything I avoided like my life depended on it, and yet here I was, practically forcing my help on her. She obviously would rather crash and burn all on her own.

  “Umm… should we be here? The police aren’t going to come barging through the door any second with guns drawn, are they?” She shifted in her seat. “There are limits to what I’m willing to expose Noble to, even if it means my car remains dead on the side of the road.”

  I was going to snap at her for being so condescending, but one look at her face and I realized she wasn’t being snide. She was honestly worried about a raid, and I couldn’t deny I’d been through more than one since coming to work here. Luckily, because the Boss’s big brother was a bigwig in the police department, the unexpected busts had dwindled down over the last few years.

  “You’ll be fine. We were raided last month and the cops left with nothing. That usually keeps them off the Boss’s back for a little while.” I tried not to laugh as she gasped and moved her mouth like a beached fish. “I’m kidding. The Boss’s brother is on the police force. Usually if anything is going down, we have a lot of advance notice. I’ll make sure to smuggle you out the front if anything goes sideways while you’re here.”

  The struggle was apparent on her face. She really needed her car fixed, but she didn’t want to be at this garage, or with me. Fortunately, logic and desperation won out and she released her hesitation with a sigh. She threw the door open and moved to get her daughter from the back seat. She was muttering under her breath the entire time, and I was shocked to realize I found her hissy-fit kind of cute. Ruffling her very pretty feathers was fast becoming one of my favorite forms of entertainment.

  I flicked my fingers in acknowledgment to the Boss when he stuck his head out of the office to see what was going on. You could have heard a pin drop in the shop as everyone stopped what they were doing to watch the young mother carry her daughter up the stairs and disappear into the apartment that ran along the upper level of the entire building. I elbowed one of the gearheads who let out a loud wolf-whistle, causing Orley’s back to stiffen and shoulders to lock. She didn’t turn around and the door slammed shut. I glared at the young guy, whom the Boss had recently brought on after finding him trying to break into the legit garage one night.

  Crawley rubbed his shoulder and glared at me. “What, dude? She’s smoking hot. I don’t usually go for moms, but she looks more like a model than a mother.”

  I punched him in the arm for good measure and pointed a finger at his face. “She might be hot, but she is also a human being who deserves respect. Mom or model, no woman likes being harassed when she’s going about her day. Now she’s going to have to explain to her little girl why what you did isn’t cool and why she isn’t obligated to pay attention to any random asshole who hollers at her. Don’t be a dick, Crawley.”

  He continued to glare at me, but was rubbing his shoulder the entire time. I wasn’t sure if I got my point across, but he shut his mouth and stepped away from me. Even if he didn’t agree with the lesson, I was a lot bigger than him. He knew if I had to use my fists to drive my point home, it wasn’t going to go well for him.

  Satisfied that Orley and Noble were stashed upstairs and out of harm’s way for now, I made my way back to the car I didn’t have time to work on and forced the thought of the woman and child as far out of my mind as I could.

  The Boss was right. Trouble did find you even when you weren’t looking for it. I wished he had warned me it would come in the form of an irresistible redhead and an adorable, blue-eyed little girl.

  Orley

  After Solo was finished with my car, it was the only thing that ran smoothly in my life. I still had no luck finding another job, and my current job didn’t appreciate that I was forced to call in for one of my few m
easly shifts because I still hadn’t found someone to watch Noble. My meager funds were dwindling down to nothing, and on top of it all, the air conditioning unit in our apartment decided to crap out. The super promised he would be by to fix it three days in a row, but had yet to make an appearance. I was on edge. I felt like every time I turned around, I walked into a new brick wall, and when I attempted to get myself straightened out, I ended up tangled in thorns. The heat, combined with too many days spent indoors because it was slightly less blistering than outside—and less dangerous—had Noble acting out.

  My normally affable child was currently on her back in the stairwell, refusing to move because it was too hot and she was too tired. She was crying, fat tears rolling down her red cheeks and snot bubbling from her scrunched-up nose as she wailed. From the sounds of it, her little toddler world was ending, and I felt like garbage, because all I wanted to do was cry right along next to her.

  We were stuck in an endless loop: I’d tell her I would carry her up the stairs if she didn’t want to walk, and Noble would scream back that she was big enough to walk on her own. So far we were lucky and no one else had attempted the stairs in the sweltering heat, but I could hear footsteps coming from above, and I knew I was going to have to haul Noble out of the way instead of letting her tantrum run its course. I was secretly hoping she would cry herself out so I could have a couple moments to feel like my stomach wasn’t full of acid and my nerves weren’t made of razor wire.

  “Honey, you have to stop. I know it’s hot and yucky. I know you’re bored. I promise I’ll take you to the park tomorrow and I’ll buy us a whole bunch of fans once I get a new job. I need you to get up and behave yourself.” I crouched down so I was hovering over her. I almost recoiled at the obvious anger in those eyes that were a mirror of my own. Not only did my child never show such hot, painful emotion, I had no idea a three-year-old was capable of feeling in such a complex and hurtful way.

  “You can’t promise if you won’t keep it.” More tears gathered, but at least she got off her back and sat on the step in front of me. Noble sniffed, long and loud. I fought the urge to cringe as she wiped her hand across her damp face. Since we’d only run down to check the mail cubby in the lobby, I didn’t have my purse or anything else on hand to wipe away the mess she’d made of herself. Sighing, I tugged at the bottom of my tank top and bent so I could use one of my last clean items of clothing to clean my daughter’s face.

  “Of course I can promise. That’s what moms do. I promise to give you the world and then work every single day until you have it.” I tried to smile at her, but Noble’s lashes were spiked together with moisture and her eyes were shiny with unshed tears. “Sometimes promises take mommies a little while to keep, but we always will. You have to be patient. Remember what patient means?”

  Noble sighed and kicked her feet, heels bumping against the step as the approaching footsteps got closer. Sweat made my hair stick to my face and neck, and I could feel moisture rolling down my spine, making my clothes clammy and damp.

  “I wanted cake. I wanted to play outside. I want to see Mrs. Sanchez and my friends. You promised.” She sniffed again and refused to meet my gaze. I was glad she looked away. Noble was way too young to know that her words were like an arrow through my very fragile heart. No mother ever wanted to hear that they let their child down, especially when it came to things that should be so very easy to make happen.

  I sighed again and maneuvered so I could scoop Noble up before she was able to launch into another protest loud enough to wake the dead. I squeezed her close and closed my eyes as I inhaled her innocent, but no longer sweet, scent. Ugh. Everything was sweaty and gross, including my precious baby. I had to tamp down the urge to throw myself on the floor and let loose the same way she did.

  “I know I promised all those things, and I will do my best to give them to you. It might not be today or tomorrow. But I haven’t forgotten. Mommy just needs some more time.” And a new job with a big fat paycheck. “How about I call Mrs. Sanchez and see if she has time tomorrow for a visit while Mr. Sanchez is at work?” I sent up a silent prayer that I could convince the woman a few minutes of her time would be worthwhile. She’d always liked Noble and treated her well, but I had no clue if she was willing to go against her husband’s wishes. I was willing to bribe her—with what, I didn’t know—if that’s what it took.

  Noble nodded tiredly against my shoulder and I breathed a sigh of relief. I was sure this was only the eye of the storm, but it gave me a window to get my kid back to our apartment so she didn’t let the entire apartment complex know what a shitty parent I was.

  I’d only made it a few steps before another woman was trotting in my direction. She was holding the hand of a little girl who was probably around eight or nine. The little girl had a swingy, sable bob, bright eyes, and a gap-toothed grin. She was wearing cowboy boots that clomped noisily on every step, but her mother seemed oblivious to the noise. The woman heading toward me was also a brunette but her dark hair was slashed through with pops of pink, purple, and teal. She looked edgier and cooler than I ever would. She had on a pair of glasses that looked both retro and trendy, but her eyes were friendly and curious as she regarded me from behind the lenses. I was getting ready to apologize for blocking the way when Noble suddenly bounced in my arms and pointed at the woman’s arm.

  “Star Wars!” Noble’s excited squeal brought a smile to the woman’s face as I glanced down at her arm. The sleeve she had tattooed there did indeed depict Noble’s favorite movie.

  “That’s right. It is Star Wars.” The other woman’s daughter giggled as she watched Noble wiggle excitedly in my hold.

  “Who’s your favorite character?” I could have kissed that gap-toothed face in relief when the other little girl distracted my cranky kid. Noble was more than happy to babble about Chewie and Princess Leia as I focused my attention on the mother.

  “Sorry. It’s been a day. We’ll get out of your way.” I offered a wobbly smile and saw a flash of sympathy in her kind eyes.

  “No rush. My husband and I are huge Star Wars nerds, so Riley is well versed in the Force. She doesn’t mind chatting about the movies, especially when someone asks about the tattoo.” She cocked her colorful head to the side and gave me a considering look. “Did you move in recently? I thought I knew all the moms in the building. I watch a lot of the kids who live here since I work from home and know just how hard being a working mom can be.”

  I felt my eyes widen and my teeth snap down on my lower lip. She was the friend Solo mentioned. The one whom he encouraged me to reach out to. The one I’d decided was probably a horrible person without even meeting her, because she lived in this place that I hated. Embarrassment washed over me in hot waves as I shifted uneasily under Noble’s animated antics as she mimed the Death Star blowing up.

  “I’ve.. uh… been here a few months. So, kind of new, and we don’t go out much. This is Noble and I’m Orley.” I offered the weak introduction as the woman continued to watch me.

  “Ahhh… You’re Solo’s broken bird. The building has been talking about you. It’s pretty impressive that you got him to give up any of his precious time to help you with your car. That boy is so busy, he’s going to run himself into the ground before he’s thirty. I’m Erica and this is Riley, by the way.” She arched a perfectly groomed eyebrow at me and gave me a faint grin. “Solo mentioned he passed my number along because you needed someone to watch the little Jedi. I was hoping you would call so I could at least give you a list of all the mom-approved places around here you might want to take Noble. It can be scary outside, but, believe it or not, there are some family-friendly options nearby you should have in your arsenal for those days you can’t stay inside.”

  This woman was so nice… and helpful. It was probably clear I’d blown her off and been judgmental, but she was still throwing me a much-needed life raft.

  I cleared my throat and put Noble down so she could stand on the step with the other little girl. M
y daughter had moved on from Star Wars to the girl’s cute cowboy boots. No doubt as soon as we were back upstairs, she would be demanding a pair of her own. I would end up promising her a pair, one more promise it was going to take me Lord only knew how long to follow through on.

  “I would love that list, thank you. Our air conditioner has been on the fritz for three days and Noble is going stir-crazy inside. I apologize for not reaching out sooner. I’ve been looking for a second job and time has really slipped away from me.” It had become a black, chilling void I was terrified I would never escape. I lifted my sweaty hair off the back of my neck and made a face. “I don’t want to keep you. I’ll give you a call before the end of the week.”

  She made a hum of agreement and told me, “Let Solo know the super is slacking. If he gives that jerk a call, your unit will be fixed within the hour. The man is useless, but he’s terrified of Solomon. I’m in apartment 3F. Just come on down when you have a free afternoon. You can bring Noble by to meet some of the other kids in the building.” I nodded and went to move around her, but paused when she put a light hand on my arm. “I would be happy to watch her for you in a pinch if you need to go to an interview or anything. I have a list of references and a whole host of qualifications. Those of us who grew up around here try and take care of each other.”