Tis The Season For Forgiving

by Nikki Lynn Barrett

  "When?" he asked. They stood in front of the car. Kinley was impatient and kept tugging on his shirt. The expression on his face made Petra nervous. She quickly pulled Kinley back, somewhat worried her persistence was going to get Eric upset. Or more upset than he seemed to be now.

  "I'll be there." He hung up, then heaved a deep sigh.

  For a split second, Petra wondered if Eric was all about to leave them to go fix something else for Gina and Evan. Then she shoved the thought out of her head. First of all, who cared if he did? Secondly, they did need a little help. The woman just lost her husband and the boy lost his father! But this was supposed to be his time with Kinley right now, and if Eric disappointed their daughter, Petra wasn't going to let it go easily.

  "I guess the doctors finally decided that my father needs a liver transplant." Eric dropped his phone in his pocket, then stuffed his hands in both pockets. "They're hoping one of the family is a match. I don't think I'll be any good, but I have to see anyway."

  Oh, his father? Guilt settled in for thinking something entirely different.

  "I didn't even know he was sick," Petra said softly. Kinley started to whine a little. "When do you need to go?"

  "Mom was hoping today. The sooner the better, in case none of us are a match. They can put him on a list if none of us are. I'm always the last to know these things." He kicked at a small pebble.

  "If you need to change your time..." Petra tousled impatient Kinley's hair. She could just take her to the park on her own.

  Eric seemed torn. He narrowed his eyes. "I don't want to change it, but I want to get this over with, too."

  Petra knew Eric's parents weren't happy with a lot of his decisions. Even though he'd slowly made it through getting sober and working through his anger, they picked at him for this or that. They never liked Petra and had blamed her for the divorce with Cheyenne, even though she'd never known a lot of the stuff until after the fact. Petra hadn't been the one to break Eric and Cheyenne up, but no matter what any of them said, she still ended up the villain.

  "Wanna go, Mama!" Kinley finally lost her patience. She folded her arms over her chest.

  Eric's phone rang again. With a sigh, he answered. He paced the front yard. Kinley scrambled to follow and Petra just waited, not really sure what was going on. Once he got off the phone, he shuffled back over to her. His cheeks were red and a deep scowl spread across his face. "I guess it won't be happening today. She was mistaken. I have to go for an appointment this week." He shook his head and scratched his head. "I didn't know it was this bad."

  "We go now?"

  "Kinley, be patient." Petra almost lost her patience. She studied Eric, waiting for his response.

  Eric nodded. "We can go now. Sorry about that."

  That seemed to satisfy her, and the three climbed in the car, park bound.

  *****

  Eric's concentration was crap, and he knew it. Petra kept eying him the entire time as he halfheartedly ran around with his daughter. His mind was on his father and the upcoming appointment to see if he was a match, and his mind was also on Gina and Evan with whatever she knew about Adrian's past. He'd had this strange feeling ever since that night.

  He spotted Kinley across the swings. She laughed and gestured for him to follow her. Just as he smiled and headed after her, something hit him hard and fast from the left. Wham! Right on the side of the head. Eric grunted and he lifted a hand to his head. Hell, what was that all about? Pain exploded all around the impacted area. He stumbled and fell. He rubbed the spot and looked around for what hit him. To his right was a football. Kinley and Petra ran toward him. His vision kind of blurred and it was very bright out all of a sudden.

  "Eric, are you okay?" Petra asked, crouching beside him.

  "Oh damn, man! I'm so sorry!" Another voice, one he didn't recognize, came from the other side of him. "I have horrible aim and I didn't mean to hit you."

  Too much chaos. The pain in his head was unbearable. Everyone kept watching him. Eric wasn't thinking and the next thing he knew, the anger surged. "Next time, watch where the hell you throw this thing!" He reached for the football and hurled it, nearly hitting the scrawny kid. The kid's eyes widened. He jumped away from Eric, grabbed the ball and took off.

  Eric huffed. Petra scrambled away from him, too. She pursed her lips together in a thin, set line. Eric knew she was disappointed.

  Damn it, he'd lost his temper. He rubbed his thumb and index finger on his forehead, wishing the pain would subside. "I probably shouldn't have done that," he muttered.

  "Daddy huwt?" Kinley's lower lip quivered.

  "Yeah, but I'll be okay," he assured her.

  Petra held out a hand and helped him to his feet. She didn't say a thing, and Eric wasn't sure what to make of it. He hated when women did that silent thing. It usually meant he was gonna hear it about soon, and it wasn't to be good.

  Once on his feet, he waited for the dizziness to ease. The side of his head throbbed.

  "I hope you don't have a concussion," she finally said, moving to take a peek. "Let me see. Oooh, you have a nice bump there."

  "Doesn't feel so nice," Eric muttered.

  Petra stopped. "I didn't mean it like that. Come on, how about I drive us back. We'll get you some ice and painkillers."

  Eric nodded. "Sounds good." He fished in his pocket for the car keys, easily willing to hand them over to her. No way could he drive right now.

  "Let's just hope it's not a concussion."

  He doubted the kid had that good a throw, but he wasn't going to rule it out. Taking a step forward and realizing the dizziness never faded, Eric wondered how he was going to make this short trip back to the car without tumbling to the ground again. He looked and felt like a fool. Today wasn't turning out all that well.

  Eric vaguely recalled the car ride to Petra's. He leaned back on the headrest and waited for the pain to dull. Kinley was quiet until they made it inside. She climbed up on the couch next to Eric and asked him a ton of questions. His patience wore thin, but he tried to keep calm. It wasn't his little girl's fault the pain was so bad. She didn't know any better. Still, the constant questions of why, what, who, and all that, jabbed on his last nerves a little.

  "Kinley, let your daddy have a little quiet. His head hurts, okay?" Petra said softly as she walked in the living room with an ice pack, a bottle of water, and some aspirin, which she promptly handed to Eric.

  He guzzled down the water with two of the aspirin, then held the ice pack to his aching head.

  About a half hour later, Kinley went down for a nap. Eric only half paid attention to what was going on around him. His eyes closed, he heard the sound of footsteps, and then there was a shift on the couch beside him. He cracked open an eyelid and stared at Petra. Her eyes held plenty of concern.

  "Pain any better?" she asked.

  He shook his head. "Not really."

  "Are you tired?"

  "A little." Why was she asking this?

  "I'd say get some rest, but if you do happen to have a concussion, the best thing to do is keep you awake."

  "I doubt I have a concussion from a stupid football!" Eric snapped, immediately regretting it. Chill man. She was only trying to help. What a grouch he was being today.

  She held up her hands as if defeated. "Okay, okay. Sorry." Without another word, Petra jumped up and busied herself picking up a stack of magazines.

  Eric wanted to kick himself physically and not just mentally. "Petra. I'm sorry. I know I'm not a bright ray of sunshine today."

  "As opposed to any other day?" she shot back, then covered her mouth. "Boy, am I full of maturity."

  Eric couldn't help himself. He laughed. Then he winced in pain.

  "Serves you right for laughing," she teased. A smile grew. "I know you have a lot on your mind, and you're in a lot of pain. I guess I can let your snappy comments slide today. I just wanted to make sure you're okay."

  "I know," Eric replied. What else could he say? He was being a jerk, even
if he did have pain and a lot on his mind. Petra was just being too nice again, but he appreciated her thoughtfulness. "I'm not looking forward to the appointment and having to face Dad," he blurted, finally relieved to say it out loud.

  "He's still upset with you over things?" Petra moved to sit beside him again.

  "Understatement," Eric mumbled with a bitter edge. His father pretty much disowned him. In his eyes, he wasn't good enough. Dad had always been hard on him, and things got worse as time went on.

  "Want some company? I'll go with you." She lowered her gaze. "If you want that, anyway."

  She'd go with him? Face his parents when they both knew how they felt about her? Neither of his parents were happy when Eric ended up with Petra. They'd wanted him to get his shit together and work it out with Cheyenne. They adored Cheyenne.

  "You'd do that for me?"

  "Why do you find it so surprising that someone would be nice?" Petra frowned.

  "Because it's being nice to me. I'm not the nicest person." The awkwardness returned. Yuck. Why did he have to open his big mouth? He should just learn to accept someone's help instead of saying something.

  Petra sat up straight and looked him in the eye. "I need to correct you. You weren't the nicest person. Lately, you're trying to be. I can see you making the changes to be better, so why can't you accept that you are more than just a tormented person? I don't know what you were like as a child, or even in your teen years. Maybe you were nice then. Maybe something happened which changed you into that man you'd become for years, but you can let him go. Be the man you're trying to be now."

  Could it be that easy? Let go?

  There were plenty of old hurts and ghosts to let go, and he didn't know the first thing about how. Even through the anger management and counseling and all the other crap he'd had to do, there was one major ghost in his past that he didn't know how to lay to rest.

  Chapter Eight

  Eric happened to pass by the school Ben went to at the time classes let out. On his way home from work early, he'd taken a detour to get away from some construction. All was going well until he noticed Evan surrounded by a bunch of kids. He didn't even know Evan attended the same school, but he should have figured.

  In the corner of his vision he saw a kid push Evan. Without hesitation, Eric parked the car. What was he doing? He had no business stopping to get involved.

  But he did.

  "Evan? Everything okay?" He hurried to get to him. Ben stepped out from behind the crowd. A bad feeling churned in his gut. He hoped like hell Ben wasn't involved with the fight.

  Evan was on the ground yelling. Eric crouched down and helped him up. Other kids were still shouting at him, and one got pretty close.

  "Wimpy kid," a tall, chubby boy snarled.

  "Mr. Eric? What are you doing here?" Evan asked. He sat up and Eric's heart raced when he noticed blood dripping from his nose.

  "Yeah, what are you doing here?" Ben was by his side now, glaring at Eric.

  "Checking on Evan." Wrong thing to say to a child that was his flesh and blood. Ben's scowl deepened.

  "Nice to know you can care about other people's kids," he snapped, then held out a hand to Evan. "Come on. Let's get away from these bullies."

  "You know Mr. Eric, too?" Evan asked once he was on his feet.

  Ben nodded. "Yeah, I know him all right. How do you know him?" Shooting another scathing look at Eric, Ben put a hand on Evan's shoulder. Then he yelled at the group of kids. "Get out of here and quit watching! Quit bullying him!"

  Eric should have known better. Ben was a good kid. Even with his upset outbursts at him, Ben would never have bullied a kid. He'd been looking out for Evan.

  "And you! Go away and mind your own damn business!" Ben yelled at Eric. He stepped closer and pushed him away.

  "Benjamin William Winston! I don't ever want to hear you say that again!" Eric turned around at the sound of Jacob's voice. He stalked over to them, surprised to see Eric standing there and marched around him. "What is going on here?"

  "Eric? Why are you here?" There was Gina, coming up from behind him. Then she gasped. "Evan! What happened?"

  Ben pointed at the tall bully. "He hit Evan."

  "Tattletale!" The boy was all about to run, the fear evident in his eyes.

  "I don't think you'll be going anywhere but the principal's office, young man." Another voice, a male that Eric didn't recognize, said from the other side.

  Everyone involved, including the parents and Eric, shuffled to the office to sort this out. Eric felt out of place and realized he never should have stopped. This wasn't his place, no matter how much he wanted to help Evan. All the curious and angry glares he got weren't helping, either.

  Jacob waited with Eric. They sat in silence for a while until Jacob turned to him. "So, I'm guessing it was you Ben swore at and pushed."

  Eric nodded and heaved a long sigh. "Yep."

  "Why? What were you doing here?"

  "The boy, Evan? He's my best friend's son. I told him the day of his dad's funeral that he could call me if he needed anything. Anyway, I happened to drive this way to avoid construction and saw some kids push him. I just acted. Ben ... well, I don't know. He's probably pissed because I was there for this kid and not him."

  Jacob nodded. The expression on his face was neutral. Eric wasn't sure what he was thinking, but he wanted to know. He squirmed in his seat. "Guess I can't blame him, but I'll talk to him about speaking to you that way."

  Eric's very first thought and reaction was to be sarcastic, but he bit his tongue. He didn't have any rights to say anything to Ben any more. Jacob did. And it wasn't anyone's damn fault but his own.

  It took a while, but the school principal finally got the story from everyone about what happened. Ben and Jacob left about ten minutes later, and with nothing left to do, Eric started for his car until a female voice called his name from behind. He turned around. Gina and Evan were heading his way.

  "I just wanted to thank you. I know it got a little messy, but it's nice to know someone's looking out for Evan. I umm-" She fiddled with her purse strap. "I'm sorry if it got you in trouble with Ben and his father."

  Eric blanched, totally not expecting that. He didn't even know she knew Ben or Jacob. And the his father comment ... damn it! "Jacob might have adopted Ben, but he's still my own flesh and blood!" The look on Gina's face was one of shock. He didn't even give her time to respond. He had to get the hell out of here. He grunted, stormed off to his car, and drove away, his heart heavy and full of hurt and anger.

  *****

  Petra shivered for the third time in five minutes. She just couldn't get warm! She checked the thermostat. The temperature in here was sixty one degrees! Well no wonder she was so cold! The heater didn't seem to be working. "Great. Another thing to fix," she muttered, holding back the urge to punch the stupid thermostat. It wasn't to blame for the problem, the lack of a good landlord was. She sighed. There was a chance for snow tonight. How the hell was she going to keep herself and Kinley warm without a damn heater? She could always hit Walmart and pick up a space heater, then keep Kinley in her room tonight so they could both share it.

  But for now, the mall. She'd promised Kinley they'd go to the Santa workshop. Jacob and Jonas had helped set up a new fun event this year since they enjoyed playing Santa at the mall.

  Kinley ran to her, bundled up in her coat and gloves. "Cold, Mommy."

  "Yeah, me too, baby. We'll go warm up in the car and grab a heater from the store."

  "Kay."

  Petra grabbed everything, turned off the heater, since the blasted thing wasn't working anyway, and they piled in the car. Once the warm air finally kicked in, Petra was instantly satisfied. She held her hands in front of the vents for a few minutes, even though she had her own pair of gloves on, then drove to the mall.

  As already anticipated, the mall was busy. She scanned the crowd for Eric, since he said he'd be here, but Petra hadn't talked to him much since the day at the park and
the football to the head incident. Was he going to skip out tonight?

  No, there he was. She spotted him by the food court, sitting at a table alone.

  "Thewe's Daddy!" Kinley waved and ran ahead to greet him.

  The expression on his face came as a surprise to Petra, At first, he had a deep haunted look in his eyes, but once he saw Kinley running toward him, it changed to ... relief?

  What was that about?

  "Hey," she said casually. "Glad you made it. How are you?"

  "Been better." So, back to the one or two word responses. What was he upset about this time? She decided to brush it off. Eric was a tough case to crack sometimes.

  "I have to leave a little earlier than anticipated tonight. The heater stopped working and I'll need to get a space heater for Kinley and I tonight."

  Eric jumped to his feet. "No heater? Even with a space heater, it's going to freeze tonight! You two can't stay there like that."

  "I don't-"

  "Stay at my apartment. My heat works. I don't know much about heaters, but we can at least call someone tomorrow."

  "Eric-" Once again, he didn't let her finish.

  "Come on, Petra. You can't seriously want to argue with me about this." He narrowed his eyes.

  "No, actually. I wanted to thank you." She held back her frustration with his jump-all-over-her attitude.

  His stance softened. "Oh," he mumbled.

  Petra patted his shoulder. "Come on, let's go take Kinley to the fun."

  On the way to the part of the mall where the festivities were happening, Jacob ran up to them. "Eric, I have the biggest favor to ask you. I have to run. My niece is in the emergency room and Jonas isn't here to take my place and-"

  "Hold on, slow down," Eric said, stopping in his tracks.

  "I need you to play Santa. I'm begging you. I can't find anyone else I know that can do this. It's just for an hour or so until Jonas gets here. He can't get out of his commitment, so he'll be here later."