Towards a Dark Horizon

by Maureen Reynolds

  As we walked back I asked Jean about Miss Hood.

  ‘As far as I know, she’s still in the mental hospital but, of course, I haven’t been to visit her.’ She stopped and looked at me keenly. ‘Now promise me you’ll not go back and see her – after all, she did try and kill you.’

  I shook my head. ‘No, Jean, I’ll not go back. It’s just that I feel so sorry for her but I know I’m being stupid.’ I didn’t add that I still had nightmares about the housekeeper. Although I sympathised with her sorry life, I still recalled the heavy candlestick in her hand and the noise it had made when it missed my head and hit the wooden banister at Whitegate Lodge. ‘No, Jean, don’t worry – I won’t see her again.’

  ‘Mrs Barrie left us both our legacies so we could have some comfort in our lives so please do what she would have wanted you to do and that’s to enjoy yourself.’

  Dear, dear Mrs Barrie, I thought, as tears came into my eyes.

  After a lovely tea, we said our goodbyes to Jean and my heart felt lighter. Her advice was sound and I fully intended to stop worrying about Danny but, back home in the Hilltown, all my good intentions flew out the window.

  Maddie was waiting for me in the house. Dad and Rosie sat beside her but the atmosphere was heavy. As if conversation had been difficult. On seeing me, Dad and Rosie both jumped up. It was as if they were both being worked by identical strings.

  They took Lily’s hand. ‘Let’s go and see Granny,’ they said, almost in unison.

  Lily looked delighted. She was certainly having a busy Sunday.

  When they disappeared through the door, Maddie burst into tears. ‘Danny has called off the engagement but he won’t tell me why. Do you know?’

  I took her hands in mine. ‘No, Maddie, I can’t help you. It has to come from Danny.’

  She looked at me with bewilderment. ‘Then you do know why?’

  ‘No, Maddie. All I can say is that he’s taken Dad Ryan’s death very badly but just give him time on his own.’ I felt terrible. On the one hand, I wanted to tell her the whole sorry story because she had a right to know but, on the other, I knew I couldn’t betray Danny. He would never forgive me and I couldn’t live with that.

  Maddie wiped her eyes. ‘I offered to give him back the ring but he didn’t want it.’

  For some reason this cheered me up. ‘Well, then, Maddie, the engagement is not really broken, is it? Cheer up – it’ll all work out. Believe me.’

  ‘Do you think so, Ann?’

  How could I tell her I wasn’t a hundred per cent or even ten per cent sure? But I couldn’t let her leave without a bit of hope.

  We walked back to the infirmary together and I left her at the porter’s window. As she walked away down the long corridor, she turned and waved – a golden vision in the drab painted corridor.

  I was suddenly so angry. ‘Blast you, Danny Ryan!’ I said aloud. ‘You’re going to lose her to somebody else and it’s your own fault.’

  The porter stuck his head out of the window. ‘Did you say something, Miss?’

  Still angry, I said, ‘No, I’m just talking to a brick wall.’

  My heart wasn’t in my job next morning when Amy, Edith and Sylvia came tumbling in. They were roaring with laughter and my mood immediately picked up and even Connie was amused.

  ‘What’s causing all this hilarity?’ I asked them as I weighed out Edith’s sweeties and gave the other two their cigarettes.

  Sylvia piped up. ‘We’re just drawing lots to see who’ll write to the dishy King Edward and offer him her hand in marriage.’ They collapsed into peals of laughter.

  Connie said, ‘Oh, he’ll have somebody in his sights if I know men. They aye do, the cunning beggars.’

  The girls set off for work and, once again, I could hear their laughter as they hurried off down the hill.

  Amidst the pomp and ceremony of a state funeral that contrasted starkly with Dad Ryan’s, King George V, ruler of Great Britain and the Empire, was laid to rest the following day. It did cross my mind that maybe the royal household also had skeletons in their closet but I quickly dismissed the idea. It had been a long week.

  3

  The German army was on the march again. Dad’s friend Joe arrived at the house, waving a newspaper. ‘German troops march into the Rhineland in defiance of the treaties of Versailles and Locarno.’

  Dad had just finished his meal and was sitting with a cup of tea beside the fire. He looked at his old friend. ‘Aye, I’ve seen it, Joe, but I don’t think they’ll start anything this time – not after the carnage of the last war.’

  Joe wasn’t so sure. He said gloomily, ‘I disagree with you, Johnny, and what makes it worse is that nobody seems to be able to stop them. You mark my words – if they get off with this, then it’ll be the turn of some other country next year. You know what this lot are capable of.’

  I left them talking about this possible new war. As far as I was concerned, I was too busy worrying about the uneasy peace that had settled on us since January.

  I took Lily’s hand and we set off for the Overgate. When we arrived, it was clear that Granny hadn’t heard about this new aggression from Germany as she was too busy with Bella.

  ‘I’m telling you, Bella, that there’s nothing wrong with Hattie or Danny.’

  Bella was having none of this whitewash – or ‘twaddle’ as she called it. ‘Well, tell me this then, Nan. Why have they broken off their engagement? I mean one minute they’re both hunky-dory and then the next they’re not speaking.’

  Granny made a dismissive noise.

  Bella went on. ‘Aye and there’s Hattie – she’s going around with a face like thunder, looking like she’s lost a half a crown and found a tanner.’

  Granny knew she couldn’t escape from this cross-examination. ‘Danny and Maddie have decided to wait a wee while before they get married and Hattie is not pleased with it.’ Her voice was firm. ‘And, as far as I’m concerned, the matter’s closed.’

  Bella didn’t look convinced and I didn’t blame her. As far as excuses went, it was pretty flimsy but this was the story that Hattie had invented.

  ‘It’s nobody’s business but ours,’ was her general statement after she had recovered from that terribly traumatic night when the doctor was called out.

  It was then decided, after her return to work, that, if anyone asked, this was the answer to give. In fact, we couldn’t do much else when faced with Hattie’s firm refusal to let the Pringles know the truth. Both Granny and I had tried to reason with her but to no avail.

  ‘What will the Pringles think?’ she had said at the time.

  ‘I would just tell them the truth, Hattie, but, if you don’t want to do that, then at least tell Maddie and she can decide if she wants them to know. Then take things from there.’ Granny had tried to be tactful but it had all fallen on deaf ears so that was the story we all stuck to.

  Thankfully, as far as Hattie was concerned, Maddie had said very little except to say the engagement was off for the time being. So we all settled into this uneasy calm. I didn’t see much of Danny and even less of Maddie and, in a way, I was grateful because I didn’t know what to say to them. I was also grateful to be kept busy at the shop and looking after Lily and the house.

  Joe became a regular visitor. ‘I’m telling you, Johnny, that this Hitler guy is a dangerous wee dictator.’ He also kept referring to the last war and telling Dad about a possible new one as if Dad could do anything to stop it – as if he could wave some magic wand.

  During these visits, I normally left the two men to their cigarettes and blethers. Connie had said I could visit her at her house if I ever wanted to get away from Joe’s doom and gloom. She knew him well. Her house was in Stirling Street, in a nice block of tenement houses. It was much more posh than ours but it wasn’t better kept. The square-shaped living room held so much furniture that reaching the fireside was like tackling an obstacle course.

  ‘This is the way my father left it and I don’t have the heart
to throw out his things,’ Connie said.

  Actually, I liked it because it resembled the furniture shop on the Hilltown with its mixture of everything.

  One night in the early summer, Connie said, ‘Although it’s a secret in the British newspapers, I’ve heard through the trade that the King is seeing a married woman. Her name is Wallis Simpson and she’s American.’

  I was agog with excitement. ‘How did you find out?’

  ‘Well, it’s in the American papers but it might just be a rumour. If she does get a divorce and marry him then this will be her third marriage.’ Connie looked sad. ‘Lucky for her I say and here I am – I can’t even get one man.’

  I wanted to ask her a favour. ‘You know that Lily is going to the school this summer, Connie?’

  She nodded.

  ‘Well, I wondered if I could maybe change my hours so that I can take her to the school in the morning and pick her up in the afternoon?’

  ‘Aye, that’s no problem, Ann. If you start at six thirty, work till eight, then come back at nine and work till your usual time, will that help?’

  I thought it was great and I said so. That would give me time to pick Lily up from the Overgate and get her to the school gate in time for her classes and the afternoons were nearly always free anyway. Thank goodness that was settled, I thought. Granny was right when she said it would all work out. If Danny and Maddie’s lives were sailing on choppy seas well at least mine seemed to be on an even course.

  Then the two letters arrived on the same day – a lovely hot day in August. The first one came from Greg, which wasn’t unexpected, and the other one came from Mrs Pringle. Greg’s said he was coming to Dundee on the Sunday and he asked if I could meet him while Mrs Pringle invited me to her house on the Saturday.

  ‘Bring Lily with you, Ann, as she’ll be good company for Joy,’ she wrote.

  On the Saturday afternoon we both set off for the Perth Road. Lily seemed strangely quiet and not like herself while I felt wary at the thought of Maddie’s mother and I wondered who else would be there, dreading the thought of Hattie and Maddie in the house also. Then I felt guilty by these thoughts – some friend I was turning out to be.

  With its smooth green lawns surrounded by banks of colourful flowers, the garden at Perth Road was a delight. The flowers’ perfume lay heavy on the warm sunny breeze. The garden sloped down towards the river and, although it was sheltered by a long green hedge, it was possible to see the Tay’s silver sheen through the greenery.

  Mr Pringle was weeding. Dressed in an old short-sleeved shirt and a battered straw hat, he looked the picture of a country gardener – except that this garden lay not far from a busy road and the noisy bustle of the city. He waved.

  Mrs Pringle was sitting by the open French window. She called out, ‘Come in, both of you, and have something to drink.’

  We went into her lounge. On my last visit, about a year ago, her settees and chairs had been covered with lovely rose-patterned covers but today they were covered in plain cream linen. It made the room seem cool and uncluttered.

  I thought of Connie’s house with its collection of possessions. If I owned a house like this, would I go for this quiet look because it was so elegant or would I choose the cosy clutter?

  Joy was sitting on the rose-coloured carpet with a pile of books. She gazed at us when we entered and she rose to her feet when she saw Lily. Normally Lily would have gone over to her and the books but not today. She clung to my skirt with her chubby hand.

  Mrs Pringle said, ‘Do you want to go to Joy’s room and play with her toys, Lily?’

  To my amazement she shook her head.

  Mrs Pringle glanced at me but I could only shrug my shoulders.

  ‘Do you both want to go outside and help in the garden?’

  Lily didn’t answer and she hid her face against my skirt. This was so unlike her.

  I bent down. ‘Lily, go and play with Joy. After all that’s why we’re here.’

  She gave me such a strange look but, after a moment’s hesitation, she let Joy lead her upstairs towards the bedroom.

  ‘I’ve no idea why she’s like this, Mrs Pringle,’ I said.

  She smiled and handed me a lovely china cup and saucer. It held a fragrant-smelling tea.

  ‘It’s Earl Grey tea,’ she explained. ‘Hattie and I just love it.’

  I memorised the name. Earl Grey. Granny would want to know everything about this unexpected visit.

  Mrs Pringle stirred her tea for a long time, as if getting up the courage to ask me the one question I dreaded. I sat in silence and let the perfume from the fragrant roses that framed the window waft towards me. It was so peaceful sitting in this lovely room but I knew what was coming.

  She put her cup down without tasting it. ‘Ann, I have to be honest with you when I say that Mr Pringle and I don’t understand about Maddie and Danny breaking off their engagement.’ She looked me straight in the eye. ‘Do you know why?’

  I didn’t know what to say. There was no way I could tell her the truth but, on the other hand, Maddie’s parents had been so good to us. She had got me my job with Mrs Barrie at Whitegate Lodge and Mr Pringle’s brother had given Dad the job at his warehouse. I didn’t want to lie to her but what could I say? I looked around to see if Hattie was in the house.

  As if guessing this, Mrs Pringle said, ‘Hattie is off today, Ann. That’s why I asked you to come. I’ve asked her and she says she doesn’t know. She says that Maddie wants to wait till her final exams are over before committing herself.’

  ‘What does Maddie say?’

  ‘That’s the point – she hasn’t said anything. She just told us that the engagement is off for the time being and that’s all.’ She looked so concerned that I suddenly wished I could tell her the whole story and the truth. Blast Hattie for being such a snob or Danny for being an idiot. I had hoped that Danny, once he had got over his initial shock, would perhaps see sense but now his mother had made it much worse by getting him to promise to say nothing.

  Mrs Pringle asked, ‘Well, Ann?’

  ‘The only thing I know, Mrs Pringle, is that Danny was so upset after Dad Ryan’s death that it’s put him a bit wrong. His dad died when he was a baby and the Ryans have aye been his family. Ma and Dad were more like his parents …’ I stopped. What was I saying? If Hattie heard this she would be mad. ‘Well, not like his parents but more like …’ I shook my head. ‘I don’t know what I’m saying, Mrs Pringle.’

  She looked at me, a shrewd expression on her face. ‘I do know what you’re saying, Ann. I think you do know what caused this break-up but you’re a very loyal girl and now I’ve put you on the spot. I’m so very sorry.’

  I was mortified. ‘It’s me that should be sorry, Mrs Pringle. I just hope that, given time, things will work out for them both.’

  She raised her cup. ‘Then let’s drink to that, Ann.’

  I don’t remember much about the homeward journey. On all my previous visits to Maddie’s house, I was always so entranced by all the lovely things that I relayed them to Granny as soon as I got home. Today, however, after my visit, I was oblivious to the warm sun and the flowery perfumes from the gardens and it was as if I walked home with my own personal black cloud over my head. I was also worried about Lily. Was she sickening for something? I hoped not as she would soon be going to school.

  Dad and Rosie were both in the house when we got back. ‘What did Mrs Pringle want to see you about, Ann?’ he asked.

  Rosie didn’t know the full story so I didn’t want to mention it in front of her.

  I smiled. ‘Och, she just wanted Lily to come over and see Joy.’

  Rosie took Lily’s hand. ‘You’ll be staying with us tomorrow when Ann goes to see Greg.’

  Lily snatched her hand away and burst into a flood of tears. ‘No, no, no. I want to go with Ann. I don’t want to stay here.’ She threw herself down on the chair and fresh tears erupted.

  We all looked at one another in amazement.


  I went over to her. ‘I’m just meeting Greg for a wee while, Lily, and then I’ll be home to see you.’

  She flung her arms around my neck. ‘I want to come as well. I want to come.’

  I looked at Rosie who seemed stunned. She was so good to Lily and now she couldn’t understand this outburst. And neither could I.

  Dad decided to be firm with her. ‘Now look here, Lily, your sister is due a day out on her own and that is that.’

  Lily began to cry again and I couldn’t bear the sight of her pathetic sobbing. Her cotton frock was wet with teardrops and her face was red with crying. I picked her up and sat her on my knee. ‘All right, Lily, you can come with me to the train station.’

  Dad looked as if he wanted to say something but instead he put on his jacket and he and Rosie left.

  After they had gone, I spoke to Lily. ‘Now, Lily, what’s brought this on? You’ve stayed with Rosie before and never had this carryon. What’s the matter?’

  ‘I don’t want you to leave me, Ann. I want to go with you.’

  I looked at her crumpled face. ‘Don’t be stupid, Lily, I’ll never leave you. You can come and meet Greg tomorrow and you can even decide where we’ll go for the day.’

  This cheered her up. We decided to have fish and chips for tea and we made a quick trip to the chip shop at the top of the Wellgate. By the time we got back and laid the table she seemed to be back to normal.

  The next day was as hot as the Saturday. Lily, dressed in her summer frock and sandals, was ready long before I was. I hadn’t seen Greg for a couple of months and I wanted to look my best.

  For some reason Lily was agitated. ‘Hurry up or we’ll miss the train, Ann.’

  I didn’t own a large wardrobe of clothes but I chose the best of what I had – a full-skirted cotton dress and white sandals. I brushed my short dark hair until it gleamed then I joined Lily at the door. She was hopping from foot to foot.

  ‘Right then, Lily, off we go.’ I knew we were far too early for Greg’s train but I didn’t want to upset my sister. For the life of me, I couldn’t understand her strange behaviour.