No Shelter Trilogy (Omnibus, Books 1-3)

by T. S. Welti

  “Jesus Christ, it’s like four in the morning,” he grumbles. “I haven’t slept.”

  “Don’t worry, I won’t bother you tonight,” I reply.

  “Nada, don’t do that.”

  “I’m just trying to do you a favor.”

  “Don’t act like you’re some innocent bystander in all this.”

  “How about you do the same?” I say.

  He grabs my hand as I turn to leave. “Come here,” he says. “It’s freezing.”

  “That’s why I have to check on Isaac.”

  I jerk my hand out of his and walk away. When I turn around, Isaac is staring at me.

  “Stop worrying about me,” he says.

  He stands and hands me my jacket and his hand brushes mine. It’s like ice. I grab his hand and notice his fingernails are turning white around the edges.

  I shake my head. “This is ridiculous,” I say. “You’re not sleeping alone tonight. We’re opening up the sleeping bag and we’ll all sleep under it.”

  Isaac rolls his eyes. “Somehow, I don’t think B-boy over there will go for that.”

  “I’ll worry about that,” I say. “Let’s go find the others.”

  We search every possible shelter we stumble upon in the frozen desert, but Mary and Qiana are nowhere. I don’t want to appear too worried, but the panic is rising inside me and sapping away my heat. The desert is a white blanket laid out before me, inviting me to rest in its folds. The shivering amplifies until I can hardly think.

  “We can’t camp here,” Daedric says to me, and I realize I’ve stopped moving. “We have to find shelter.”

  “There’s nothing out here,” Isaac replies. “Look at her. She’s freezing.”

  “If we stay here we’ll die,” Daedric say. “Get her other gloves out of the backpack.”

  Isaac pulls my hunting gloves out of my backpack, which he has been carrying for me. He helps me slip them on and Daedric slips my mittens over the gloves. Daedric pulls one of his spare shirts out of his backpack and begins unzipping my jacket. I don’t know what he’s doing.

  I drop to my knees and try to lie in the snow, but Daedric pulls me up. He takes my jacket off and slips my arms into his shirt. It hangs around me like a dress. His hands are a blur as he tries to button the shirt quickly, but he keeps accidentally grazing my breasts.

  “Stop that,” I say, giggling as I push his hands away. “I can do it.”

  I reach for the first button, but my mittens get in the way.

  Daedric pushes my hands down and finishes buttoning the shirt. He helps me back into my jacket and ties the hood tightly around my face.

  “Is that better?” he asks.

  I nod and he kisses me on the lips. His lips are hot and I don’t want him to stop, but he pulls away quickly. He plants a quick kiss on my nose and I can’t help but smile.

  The shivering stops and I turn to Isaac to make sure he’s okay. His chin is tucked down and his hands are stuffed tightly inside his coat pockets. He shoots me a half-smile before he speeds up to walk ahead of us.

  A smile can mean a million things. A smile can mean I’m happy to see you. A smile can mean I’m happy for you. It can also mean I’m trying not to say something I know I’ll regret.

  CHAPTER 12

  “You gotta be kidding me,” Daedric says when I suggest we all sleep on the floor of the railroad shack with his sleeping bag over us.

  “You have to be kidding me,” Isaac corrects him.

  Daedric scowls at Isaac and just as I’m about to step between them my stomach roars with hunger.

  I throw up my hands. “Go ahead and kill each other. At least I’ll have something to eat once you’re dead.”

  “You’d better keep your hands to yourself,” Daedric warns Isaac. “I’m going to look for firewood.”

  Isaac sits on the control panel in the shack and stares at me with a knowing grin.

  “What?”

  “It’s cute how he does everything you ask,” he says. “You should capitalize on that. Oh, wait...”

  I shake my head with disbelief. “You have some nerve talking to me like that after what you did to Mary.”

  I storm out of the shack and take off in the same direction as Daedric’s footprints.

  Isaac appears at my side. “I never led you on when I was with Mary, and she knew what she was getting into. You can’t compare what I did to her to what you’re doing to me.”

  “What am I doing, Isaac?”

  “You want it all,” he says. “And I don’t blame you, but I never thought you, of all people, would string me along. After what we’ve been through.”

  “You make it seem like I’m sitting around hatching a master plan to break your heart,” I say.

  Daedric’s footprints have disappeared. The snow swirls around me in gusts threatening to erase me, as well.

  Isaac grabs my hand to stop me. “I know you’re not doing it on purpose, but I don’t think you understand what it’s like watching you with him.”

  “You’d be surprised at what I understand,” I reply.

  He narrows his eyes. “How long are you going to keep punishing me for what happened with Mary? It’s been more than three months.”

  “I’m not trying to punish you,” I say.

  “You love me,” he whispers, brushing a cluster of snowflakes off my cheek. “I just hope I’m still alive when you figure it out.”

  He takes my hand and pulls me toward the shack. I let him take me because I’m tired of arguing. Isaac is not the one I should be fighting. I’m the one who needs to straighten myself out. And I need to do it tonight.

  We sit around the fire with the railroad shack behind us like a chaperone in the shadows waiting to discipline me if I make a wrong move—or the wrong choice.

  “Two days with no food,” I say to break the silence.

  “I’ll help you hunt tomorrow,” Daedric replies.

  Isaac doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t have to. I know what he’s thinking.

  “I don’t need help,” I say, as I throw a few twigs into the fire. “I hunt better alone.”

  Isaac stands and walks into the shack. Daedric looks at me. His blonde hair is sticking out in all directions from the bottom of his knit cap, but his face still has that smoldering model look. I turn away because I can’t bear to look at him and think what I’m thinking.

  “We should get some sleep,” I say, before I make my way to the shack.

  Isaac is sitting on the control panel when I enter. I don’t know what to say so I start clearing some debris from the floor of the shack to make room for us.

  “We can lay our coats down on the floor and pull the sleeping bag over us,” I say, as I kick aside an old metal lunchbox and an empty water bottle.

  “You can use my jacket for a pillow,” Isaac says, as Daedric walks in.

  Daedric begins unrolling his sleeping bag making no effort to hide the grimace on his face. Isaac jumps down as I sit on the dirty wooden floor and start removing my jacket. He helps me pull it off then he lays it on the floor behind me.

  I have to say something.

  Daedric narrows his eyes at us. Just two nights ago I was ready to completely give myself to Daedric. He knows something has shifted.

  I lie back on my jacket and stare at the cobwebs on the ceiling. Isaac and Daedric both wait to see which of them will lie down first.

  “After you,” Isaac says and Daedric lies down on my left.

  Isaac lies down on my right and they pull the sleeping bag over us. The fuzzy flannel interior of the sleeping bag covers my face and I lie silently in the darkness for a moment before I scoot up. My head is level with theirs now. I glance at Daedric. He’s staring at the ceiling. I glance at Isaac and he’s staring straight at me through the darkness.

  I take a deep breath and close my eyes. “Good night,” I whisper.

  “Good night, beautiful,” Isaac whispers in my ear.

  “Good night, Nada,” Daedric says before he turns
away from me.

  In a situation like this my mom would tell me to follow my heart.

  I lay in silence with my hands clasped over my heart trying to grasp at the longest string, but they’re all tangled. Isaac puts his hand on mine and I turn to him. He lifts my head gently to slide his rolled up jacket underneath my neck. I look in his eyes and I know.

  CHAPTER 13

  There’s no way the universe was created in seven days. It took me over a week to create a Styrofoam universe for a science project. It once took me a week just to clean my room.

  And it took two and a half years to realize I’m in love with Isaac.

  I wake to find my arms wrapped around Isaac’s arm like a ribbon around a maypole. I extract myself and he wakes instantly. He smiles at me, his eyes filled with relief.

  He leans over to kiss me and I place my hand on his chest to stop him. “Wait,” I whisper.

  I have to find a way to tell Daedric without causing spontaneous combustion. Openly kissing Isaac doesn’t seem like a very tactful approach . I turn to Daedric and he’s gone.

  “Where is he?” I say, as I spring to my feet.

  “I don’t know,” Isaac mutters, as he stands and unrolls the jacket I’ve been using as a pillow.

  He peels my jacket off the floor and holds it up for me to get inside. I pull it on quickly as my eyes comb the shack for Daedric’s backpack. It’s gone too.

  “I guess B-boy’s a bit of a sore loser,” Isaac remarks.

  “That’s not helping,” I say, as I push him out of the way and step outside.

  The fire is dead. The storm has passed and the sun is rising behind the shack. I search the glaring snow for footprints, but the snow holds tightly to any knowledge of Daedric’s whereabouts.

  Daedric wouldn’t waste his time searching for firewood in the morning. If we want any chance of eating today, we have to get an early start toward the mountains. Not to mention we still have to search for Mary and Qiana on the way. We can’t sit around singing campfire songs with empty bellies.

  “He disappeared,” I say.

  “He can’t be too far,” Isaac says, handing me my mittens. “We’ll catch up to him.”

  “Is that supposed to make me feel better?” I say. “You know we can’t catch up to him. He’s a better hiker than both of us!”

  “Why are you getting mad at me? He’s the one who ditched us.”

  “I can’t believe this,” I whisper.

  “Just three days ago you were ready to leave him behind to come with me.”

  “That’s when I knew they were all safe! Mary and Qiana could be dead for all we know. Does that mean nothing to you?”

  Isaac looks at me as if I’ve accused him of being the devil. “It means more to me than it does to you.”

  A soft chuckle escapes my lips. “Was that supposed to be an insult or a confession? I guess that depends on whether we’re talking about Mary or Qiana, right?”

  Isaac shakes his head and storms off toward the mountains. I charge after him and pass him up easily. He speeds up to keep pace with me and ends up passing me up.

  I’m so tempted to pass him up again, but I don’t want to tire myself out too quickly. I can barely lift my arms as it is from the lack of food.

  He slows so he’s next to me. “I thought we were racing.”

  “Racing who?” Each other? The next storm? Daedric?

  Isaac grabs my hand and pulls off my mitten. He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it softly then he puts my mitten back on and lowers my hand as we continue walking.

  I roll my eyes at his attempt at chivalry.

  “Nada is not impressed,” he says. “Just wait till I find your boyfriend. Then you’ll be showering me with gratitude.”

  We’re torn between searching potential shelters for Mary and Qiana and trying to catch up with Daedric. I offer to go ahead while Isaac searches, but he refuses to split up. After four hours of full-steam hiking, we stop to search the old Air Force base.

  We search the fire station first. The rusted red fire engine sits abandoned in the station, but all the equipment on the truck and in the station is gone. Everywhere we walk we become entangled in spider webs. The red firefighter lockers lay empty in the corner, ripped from the floor and turned on their side to shake out every possible prize. A chill passes through me.

  “Mary?” I call out toward the second level of the station.

  “They’re not here,” Isaac says, glancing warily around the station as if he expects the Guardians to jump out at any moment. “This base is too big. Let’s just search for some sign of fire.”

  “Isaac?” I whisper, as we make our way out of the station. “How do you know the Guardians are after all of us now?”

  Isaac bites his lip as he thinks. “Because they told me if I didn’t go back they would kill you all. I think….”

  “You think what?”

  “Nothing,” Isaac says, as we make it onto a street where we pass more empty buildings in our search for some sign of fire.

  “You can’t tell me they want to kill us all then refuse to say anything else,” I say. “What are you thinking?”

  “Okay, try not to freak out when I tell you this.”

  “Go on…”

  “I think they’ve been following you all since you left the Salton Sea.”

  I stop in the middle of the street and Eve’s face flashes before me. Her last words to me sound clearly in my mind.

  Don’t promise me you’ll come back. Just promise you won’t let them take any more pieces of you.

  Eve is a piece of me.

  “The scavengers,” I whisper, thinking of the day our campsite was ransacked by the scavengers who stole all our food.

  It wasn’t scavengers.

  “Why?” I say, shaking my head. “Why does it keep getting worse? It was supposed to get better.”

  I crouch in the middle of the street and put my hand on the asphalt to steady myself. I need food. I need sleep. Most of all, I need to know Eve is all right, but she’s three hundred miles away.

  Isaac crouches in front of me. “Nada, this was always going to happen,” he says. “The Guardians raided the cave twice before Daedric even came along. It was just a matter of time before they told Vic where we were hiding out. He was coming for us whether we went to the Salton Sea or not.”

  Wherever Daedric is, he is freezing. He left his sleeping bag draped over Isaac and me as we slept this morning. This was Daedric’s final gift. If he makes it to the cabin, he’s going to discover he made a huge mistake offering to help me find Isaac. That’s a big if.

  I lie down in the sleeping bag Isaac has laid out on the floor of the old commissary. Isaac slides in after me. He zips the bag up behind him and immediately wraps his arms around my waist. He buries his head in my hair. The trembling in my chest subsides as my body warms up.

  My world has changed so much in the last ten years; sometimes I forget I’m still human. What would a normal human do if they were facing death? Ten years ago I probably would have said I wanted to go to Disneyland or go skydiving.

  I turn around to face Isaac. “I want to do it.”

  “Do what?” he asks, his eyes still closed.

  The shiver in my chest returns with my nerves. “If we die tomorrow... I don’t want to die a virgin.”

  Isaac opens his eyes but he doesn’t speak.

  I grab the back of his neck and pull his face toward me. I start to kiss him, but he pulls away.

  “We’re not dying tomorrow, Nada.”

  “Well, we’re going to die soon.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Are you rejecting me?” I ask.

  He chuckles. “I just don’t want you to do something you’re going to regret.”

  “Why would I regret it?”

  He holds my chin between his thumb and forefinger as he stares at my face. “I don’t know if you’re ready and I don’t know if you’ll regret it, and I don’t want to take that chance
.”

  “I am ready,” I insist. “I’m eighteen. I was sixteen when... when we slept in the snow.”

  A long pause follows this statement. Finally, he reaches up and brushes my cheek with his fingertips.

  “Are you sure?” he whispers.

  “Yes.”

  Isaac leans forward and kisses me. His lips are so soft and his tongue moves slowly in and out of my mouth like a violinist's bow, playing every note in my body. His hands move over my back lightly tracing the curve of my spine. He brushes the sensitive area over my ribs and I gasp.

  His lips move over my jaw and down to my neck as his hands undo the clasp on my bra. He easily unhooks the final clasp and I peel off my shirt and bra in record time.

  “It’s too cold,” he whispers, as he stares at my bare breasts.

  I shake my head and he hastily pulls his shirt off. He’s thinner than the last time I saw him without a shirt, but he still has the kind of body they printed on billboards before the storm. I run my fingers over his belly and he shudders. He lies on top of me, supporting his weight on his elbows, and kisses me deeply. My breasts graze his chest every time he moves and it feels so natural; like this is what Isaac and I are made for.

  He moves down slowly, lightly kissing my neck and collarbone before he reaches my chest. His tongue traces a circle around my nipple then he kisses it softly. His lips move gently down to my belly button. He undoes my belt and pants and I lift my pelvis so he can slide my pants off. He tosses them aside and moves down on me.

  His hands caress the insides of my thighs as he kisses me where I’ve never been kissed. My back arches as my entire body begins to tremble. I want to squirm away, but it feels too good. He holds me tightly as my body releases one final shudder.

  I look down and glimpse a smile on his face as he kisses my belly.

  “Wow,” I whisper.

  He slides all the way up so we’re facing each other and I can feel him stiff against my thigh.

  He plants a soft kiss on my lips and looks me in the eye. “I love you, Nada.”

  “I know.”

  I shift my hips a little and he holds my gaze as he slides into me. I close my eyes and bite my lip to distract me from the pain.