Princess Rescue Inc

by Chris Hechtl

  “Yeah, but they lost an asset to do it,” Perry grimaced. They'd listened as the village elder had moaned about the loss of the draft animal. Nothing had been said about the dead or the destroyed buildings, fences, or the vehicle. Apparently those could be replaced a lot easier than the damn titan. “Not that I'm complaining. Those damn things are scary.”

  “Just be glad it wasn't a rhinotrike packing armor and weapons,” the Gunny grunted.

  “Yeah, there's that,” the lieutenant sighed rubbing the bandage on his scalp. “There is that,” he sighed again.

  <==={}------------>

  Ryans and Deidra smiled at one another as they walked along the road. They had a growing crowd, both in guards and in fans.

  “I see the fans still adore you,” Ryans said smiling to her. She had her hand in his. She turned to smile politely at the crowd and then waved. She tugged his hand to move on. “This isn't another parade is it?” he asked kicking at the snow. She grimaced and shook her head.

  “Come on, we've got to get to the city hall,” she urged. “Honestly, why we couldn't ride in a carriage...” She was wearing a forest green fleece overcoat with a bright blue and yellow spider silk scarf. He could just make out her simple circlet crown in her blond locks.

  He chuckled. “You're looking more and more Terran every day you know that?” he teased, referring to the design of her outfit. It was for winter of course, thick and well designed, but clearly a modern gaijin design. A woman was behind them sketching it on a slate. He smiled at her as he playfully swung their connected arms back and forth. “I needed the exercise you said. We seem to not be getting enough in other ways,” he said, leering as she peeked at him. She ducked, blushing and dimpling and then punched his arm. He chuckled softly. “Besides it's good for your people to see you. Although the security situation isn't ideal,” he smiled a little toward a nearby guard who frowned, looking left and right. Waters and Maximus had trained them well.

  They made it to the garage area just in time for a group of students to come out. Scooter was with them, talking animatedly with a pair of students. He was gesturing about something as he spoke. His charges, young and old watched, fascinated.

  “Is that Zara?” Ryans asked amused. “Yup,” he said, answering his own question as he took in the sight of the protective guards by the door. He had to smile at that. “That explains where she's been getting off too...and in whose company no less,” he said. He smiled.

  “So this is where you've been going off to sister?” Deidra demanded, hands on her hips, lips pursed. Ryans gave her an amused look as she let his hand go.

  Zara's shoulders hunched and she turned. Ryans noticed she had her reddish honey hair up in a ponytail for convenience, and had smudges of grease and grime on her cheek and hands.

  “Enjoying a new trade?” Ryans asked. “I see you've got quite a fan club Scooter,” Ryans said nodding to the mechanic. He smiled at the mechanic.

  “You? You dare come around here? I... you...” Scooter made throttling motions with his hands. “I just got that baby dialed in perfectly after her dents from the battle were hammered out then you had to play chicken with one of those titan thingies?”

  Ryans chuckled. “Wasn't me remember? That was Perry and Paris so talk to them. Believe me, we would have preferred not to. Shit happens Scooter; you of all people know that. Besides, it gives you a chance to dig out your tools and show off and play.” He grinned as Scooter snorted.

  “Are you really mad at them Scooter?” a boy asked looking upset.

  “No son, he's just yanking my chain,” Ryans said. The kid looked at him confused then straightened, shoulders back. “It means he's giving me a hard time for fun,” Ryans explained.

  “I'll have you know sirrah, I am Sir Siegfried, Lord of Appleworthy,” he said, eyes flashing. “And you are?”

  Scooter's hand rested on the kids shoulder. “That's my boss kid so ease up. That is Eugene Ryans. And his boss is his wife the Queen standing right there next to him.”

  The boy's eyes widened in sudden startled appreciation before he bent his head flushing and bowed. “I meant no disrespect my lieges.”

  “Appleworthy?” Ryans asked looking confused to Deidra. “I don't remember that on the map.”

  “That's because it's a part of Duluth... and now part of our Imperium. You seem young and quite... vigorous for your rank and title Sir Siegfried,” she said politely, nodding to the boy. She treated him as an adult and near equal Ryans realized.

  Siegfried kept his eyes downcast but nodded. “I was but a squire when the, ah...”

  “When the campaign began?” Ryans asked politely, keeping it neutral.

  Siegfried nodded. “Yes my liege.”

  “And you were elevated in combat?” Deidra asked. Zara looked at her challengingly. Deidra pulled a hanky out of a vest pocket and tossed it to her sister. Zara looked at it questioningly until Deidra motioned to her face.

  The princess flushed and turned away wiping at the smudges.

  “Ah...” The boy turned to see Zara, then back. “Yes my lady,” he admitted. He nodded.

  Deidra nodded. “Very well. You're here to learn the new gaijin skills to better your people?”

  “Ah...”

  “Just say yes Dominus,” Ryans said amused. “And you can look up. You don't need to study your shoes,” he said wryly. The boy looked up slowly. “That's better. Now, I'm glad you’re taking the time to learn this. Do you enjoy mechanics?” he asked. He revised the kid's age at around fourteen. He was short, and from the voice he hadn't quite hit full puberty yet. He did have the beginning stages of the usual acne though.

  The boy nodded. “It's so amazing to see the wheels turning, the parts...” He motioned with his hands.

  “Good. Glad you've got a worthy apprentice then Scooter,” Ryans said nodding to the burly mechanic. “Appleworthy... is it named because it has Terran apples?” he asked. “Your land I mean.”

  “Yes my liege,” the boy smiled.

  “Good to know. I'll have to buy some. I've got a couple of family recipes for pies and treats that have apples as the main ingredients,” Ryans said smiling. The boy blinked at him then smiled tentatively. “Are you just learning vehicle mechanics or general mechanics?” he asked the teenager.

  “Ah...”

  “Both. We're going to work on the hydroelectric water wheels along the river later today,” Scooter said. “You'll get a kick out of that guys and gals, think of the alternator in the truck but very big and powered by the water wheel,” he explained. He used his hands to show the size difference. “With of course a lot more power and low in torque. It's got enough power to power this here garage plus a couple of blocks of businesses and houses around here,” he said and then grinned. “That is when the river's not froze over like now.”

  “Are you coming?” he asked them after a moment.

  “Um no,” Ryans gave his wife a look. She gave a firm shake of her head. He rolled his eyes a little. “We've got a prior appointment or I'd gladly help,” he said pointedly. He nodded to Zara. “I'm glad you're getting a look though princess, it should help you later in life,” he smiled to her. She nodded and murmured thanks.

  “All right you grimy lot, let’s get cleaned up a bit then go get some lunch, then we've got a turbine to put together,” Scooter waved to the outdoor sinks nearby. Ryans waved as he turned with Deidra and left.

  “Interesting,” he murmured.

  “Is she interested in the mechanical contraptions or the company?” Deidra asked amused. Her lips puckered in a not quite smile.

  “Probably a bit of both,” he answered, glancing back to see her cleaning up. The boys were glancing her way. She was one of only three girls in the group. He caught Deidra peeking as well. “But probably a bit more of the company right now,” he chuckled, catching Zara's smile and girlish giggle as a boy rubbed at her hand. Good, he thought, the girl was settling in and seemed more... relaxed around men. And to think she actually liked a k
id from Duluth after what happened to her? He thought with a mental shake of his head. He felt Deidra poke him. “Huh? Oh sorry, woolgathering again,” he said smiling politely at his spouse. “Where next?” he asked.

  <==={}------------>

  They looked out across the crowd. They were near the entrance to Market Street, one of four markets in the capital. Obviously they weren't the only ones out enjoying the freakishly warm spell. It was a balmy seventy, nice enough for midday but in a couple of hours, when the suns went down it would cool fast. “Why is it that you didn't fight my lord? My lady?” a voice in the crowd asked. Ryans sighed.

  “This again? Can we get off this broken record?” he grumbled. Deidra touched his hand with hers while her unseen foot stamped on his toe.

  “Ow! Oh ah...” He sighed. “Look part of it was sound military strategy, the second part was orders.” He shrugged.

  “Orders?” Duke Pryor rumbled, coming through the parting crowd.

  Deidra sighed and then straightened, jutting her chin out. “Mother's. As ruling Queen she ruled that we were too important to risk. She ordered us to remain out of the battle.”

  “It's luck that Deidra is trained to obey. She's quite the warrior woman and I know she was disappointed at not being in the thick of things until the end,” Ryans teased. They both knew very well she had been in the thick of things.

  “And you? You were not her subject. You could have disobeyed,” Duke Pryor asked. Apparently he wasn't quite ready to let this go just yet. “Were you not called to battle?”

  “Of course. But the order made sense. And besides, I had another reason. Strategic,” Ryans explained and then he shrugged. “I needed to be where I could see the battle to help direct it. Perry, the general...” He nodded to the general standing near, seemingly bartering for something. “And I had to be where we could see as much as possible. It's nice to have a map and reports... but well, the human experience is defined in what we see and experience ourselves... we had to see it for ourselves.”

  “In other words you had to see it for yourself to believe it?” Pryor asked amused.

  “Exactly,” Ryans chuckled. “I've played war games since I was a child. I know about disconnect in strategic and tactical applications and I wanted to minimize that,” he shrugged. “It worked, we're here.” He waved to them all.

  Duchess Pryor nodded. “Indeed we are. Now as to more important matters, I believe we were discussing the upcoming trade delegation with the grand Duke?”

  “Actually, no, we were shopping, but if you want to talk a bit as we go...” Ryans said smiling politely. The Duke nodded, joining them.

  <==={}------------>

  It took a while, but finally the Duke had got his fill of discussing the grand Duke's visit and then politely made his excuses and departed. The royal couple walked through the market hand in hand, smiling and nodding politely to those who saw and bowed to them. They moved on quickly, pausing once in a while to look at an interesting trinket. Today was a day to be treasured, a rare, brief warm spell, the last gasp before winter, the cold hard winter. Apparently the weather played tricks on them, Ryans wasn't certain if the gas giant had anything to do with it, reflecting light onto the moon to warm it.

  He enjoyed the sights around them. The trees planted in rows along the walk and around the perimeter of the park were quite beautiful, the leaves and needles were startling shades of blues and purples along with the usual browns, reds, and yellows. The leaves were falling with every gusty windstorm now. Apparently the serfs collected them for kindling and fire starting material.

  In their discussion with the Duke Zara had somehow found her way to them. He was amused by it, though Deidra seemed a little put out by the third wheel her sister represented.

  Ryans paused near a pet stall, watching with amusement as Zara looked at each of them and Deidra looked amused but more interested in the jewels next door. She looked them over, eyes gleaming a little. He heard a giggle and turned to what Zara was looking at.

  The cages hanging from the top door were wire and wood, with different alien critters in them. A pair of them held cowering creatures. Zara was fascinated.

  She squeaked when she felt something tug at her skirt. looking down she saw a wide eyed critter pawing at her. She petted it and then went back to looking up into the cages above.

  “What's in there?” Ryans asked, and then froze as a tiny hand grasped the cage bar. It had an opposable thumb he thought dumbly as the seller came over.

  “Ympes great Dominus,” the seller said, bowing. His jowls danced as his chin quivered in anxiety.

  Ryans puzzled over that word for a moment. He looked it up with a fast search on his phone. It came back as a Scandinavian word meaning young tree or imp. “It translates to Imp,” he said looking up.

  Zara's fingers traced the imp’s tiny fingers on the bars. She turned to the seller with a glare. “Father banned them. No one in the Kingdom is supposed to have them as pets.”

  The seller squirmed. “Ah... I realize that my lady...But they were orphaned and I couldn't just leave them...”

  “Princess...” a lady said quietly, coming over to her. Zara nodded politely to her. The seller's eyes were wide. He went pale.

  “Can we get a better look at them?” Ryans asked.

  Zara frowned. “They live in the trees in the royal forests and much prefer heights. A few in the hills live in dens.” She turned to glare at the hapless seller.

  Sensing a tiff and the lack of her husband's presence, Deidra stopped window shopping and came over to see what was going on. Zara pointed to the cages wordlessly. Deidra tried to look, standing on her tip toes but couldn't.

  “Nate I need you in the market,” Ryans said quietly, turning to the side for a little semblance of privacy as he tapped the radio network.

  “I've got a lot of cataloging...” Nate said as he picked up. “We're leaving soon and...”

  “Nate, arboreals. With thumbs,” Ryans replied, hiding his exasperation. He turned back to see the seller had used a hook to get one of the cages down. A trio of hand sized creatures peered out in terror from under a rag. Their eyes shone. One plucked at the cloth. Another chittered. The third curled up into a ball, eyes and ears closed. It shivered in misery.

  Zara felt the tug on her skirt and looked down once again. Her eyes widened as she saw the hand. “And these two were orphaned I suppose?” she accused, touching the bare hand.

  “I... ah...” The man's hand shook. Deidra caught the cage before it fell. The imps chittered at her. One came to the bars and then caressed her hand. It plucked at the ring on her finger. “They like shiny things my lady,” the dealer said.

  “Magpies,” a guard said with a sniff. “Trouble in a cage. Best get rid of them quick my liege; if they get loose they'll cause no end of trouble.”

  “You know of them?” Ryans asked still ignoring Nate's incoherent sputters from the radio net.

  “Yes my lord. Some call the ones that become nuisances’ gremlins. Women who cannot bear children or who are spinsters have them. They call them mannequins or changelings. Cute when they're young, but a terror as they get older. Smart too,” he explained and then grimaced. “Some of the pickpockets have trained them to steal... not that it was that hard. They all love shiny things,” he said and then grimaced once more. “A few oldsters have trained them to fetch and do things for them when their hands go bad but they usually turn on their owners after a time.” He shook his head. “Trouble, pure and simple.”

  “Can they use tools?” Ryans asked, eyes intent. He looked at each of the creatures. They were bipedal; their upper four arms were... he paused. “Are they wearing diapers?” he asked looking to the shopkeeper.

  The man gulped. “Ah. Yes my lord. They tend to fling their... unpleasantness at passers when disturbed.” He watched as one licked Deidra's finger. “Careful my lady, they have sharp teeth.”

  “I should think so. This one is still a pup,” she said stroking it with a finger.
The animal cooed. It plucked at her ring on her finger then stroked it. It went to the back of the cage and picked up a twig and then came back. Carefully it tried to pry the ring off. Deidra giggled.

  “Nate. Nate,” Ryans sighed. “Earth to Doctor Billings...”

  “I really can't...”

  “Tool users Nate.”

  “...” The pause of stunned silence made him smile. “Did you just say...? I'll be there, ah...”

  “Third row, fourth stall if you’re coming from the direction of the palace. Near the center of the market.”

  “Right. I'm...” Ryans winced as he heard a crash and groan. “I'll...”

  “Just don't kill yourself getting here.” He smiled shaking his head as the signal terminated with a click.

  “You know the law,” Deidra said icily as she turned her eyes to the shopkeeper. The man gulped and fell to his knees. His head was on the ground.

  “Please your majesty, have mercy...”

  Zara was bent down, petting another of the creatures. This one had short brown and white speckled fur. Like the arboreals it had long pointed ears and a long tail. The one she was petting was larger, wearing a jeweled collar it tugged at with its upper arms. The collar had a tiny lock and chain attaching it to the back of a cage.

  “I'd say that you’re in deep pucky,” Ryans sighed, noting his wife in a temper. “I take it imps are a protected species?” he asked. She nodded, eyes on him then on the shopkeeper. He was surprised by that, surprised someone would think of protecting species in this culture. Every day he learned something new.

  “I didn't know, I didn't know!” the shopkeeper gibbered.

  “Won’t wash, you already admitted you did,” Ryans sighed shaking his head. “I'd say you lost your products...and you’re going to get punished.” He gave his wife a look. Her lips pursed.

  Nate came up at a run, guards with him. Ryans shook his head. “Calmly Nate, don't spook them,” he called motioning him to slow. Nate slowed down and nodded. The market crowd was turning toward them, noting a scene. Ryans frowned. “Perhaps we should wrap this up and get moving soon, we're making a scene and drawing a crowd,” he said. A nearby guard looked over and nodded.