Chaotic (Imperfect Perfection)

by Williams, C. A.

  “See you then, Della.”

  I practically skipped to the bus stop in glee after leaving Shorty’s. Sure, I was going to be kept pretty busy with school, studying, and now a job, but I think I could handle it.

  “Well, don’t you look happy? I’m sure it doesn’t have anything to do with going to visit my boyfriend.” I stopped abruptly when I heard that icy tone directed at me and turned to see Mariah glaring at me with both hands placed on her hips.

  “Um…well…I just-”

  “Don’t try to deny it. I know all about your little ‘hang out session’ tonight. Nash might be excited that you’re back in town, but he still tells me everything.” I was just about to argue that he didn’t mention who he was meeting up with the other night, but I decided to keep my lips sealed. No need to get Nash in trouble for no reason.

  “You’re more than welcome to come. I was actually just heading over that way.” She looked like she was really considering just that, before she sharply shook her head.

  “I think I’ll pass, but trust me, if I wanted to be there, I would, I don’t need an invitation from you. So how much catching up have you and Nash done? Has he learned about your dirty little secret yet?”

  My stomach rolled at her words, and by the evil smile she was giving me I knew, I just knew that somehow she had found out about my past. “Excuse me?”

  “Oh, I know all about you, Della,” she replied leaning in to whisper in my ear. “And I don’t think Nash would like how much you’ve really changed. You do know about his little sis getting knocked up when she was sixteen, right? It was a little bit of a family secret, but Nash never acted that way. When she wanted to get an abortion, Nash did everything in his power to make her change her mind and she did. He’s now a proud uncle,” she added in a spiteful tone, leading me to believe she wasn’t exactly happy about having to share Nash’s attention.

  “Look, Mariah, I don’t know what you think you know but it’s really none of your business. Everyone makes mistakes, and unfortunately I have a few of those. I don’t see why you had to go and stick your nose in my business. That really just makes you a little pathetic.”

  The bus pulled up and I moved to get on, but she stopped me, pulling on my elbow so I couldn’t go any further. “I know everything, Della. Social media is a real bitch, you know? And I’m making it my business because you just had to involve yourself with my boyfriend. If you try anything with him, I guess I’ll just have to tell him what a bad, bad girl his perfect Della is. We wouldn’t want that to happen, would we?”

  I didn’t reply, just yanked my arm out of her claws and jumped onto the bus before it took off. I watched her stand there through the window until the bus started up, and she disappeared out of sight. I wasn’t proud of what I had done in the past and now knowing about Nash’s stance, I’m sure he wouldn’t be so welcoming if he found out, but I wasn’t about to let Mariah spill my story to him. Sooner or later, I would have to relive my past whether I wanted to or not.

  I got off at the stop Nash had instructed me to. It was an older neighborhood with giant houses that looked to be occupied by mostly fraternities. I checked the address again when I reached a large brick house with a small front porch. The outside was littered with beer cans and food wrappers and it made me cringe at the thought of the inside.

  Before I could even knock on the door, it was whipped open, and Nash came out in nothing but a pair of blue athletic shorts, pulling me into a hug. I let myself get lost in his comforting soapy scent for just a few seconds before I pulled away, placing my hands against his hard chest to push back. That was a mistake because the contact just made me tingly all over, but Nash didn’t seem to even notice.

  “I’m glad you could make it, Della. Let me show you around.” I walked cautiously behind him as he tugged on my hand, pulling me through a wide space that made up the living room and kitchen. Well, I guess that’s what you could call it.

  There was a large flat screen centered above a fireplace, with at least three different gaming systems set out on the mantle. Two overstuffed and overused chairs were set right in front of the TV and right behind it was a pool table and a ping-pong table.

  A pin ball machine stuffed in the corner completed the living room/ game room and then he pulled me into the kitchen which about made me hurl. Dirty dishes were everywhere, the counter was pretty much nonexistent and something resembling spaghetti sat in a pot on top of the stove.

  “Sorry,” he said sheepishly. “Really, I clean up after myself, but Nick and Steve tend to be a little messy. C’mon, I’ll show you my room just to prove it.” He led me up a winding staircase, pushing open the door at the end of the hallway to reveal a room that surprisingly was clean, I mean like overly clean.

  Nothing was out of place and it looked like he even dusted around the picture frames that were organized on his shelves. I walked over, looking at each one, most of which contained him and Mariah. I noticed a little girl with him and a girl, who looked like his younger sister, Serena.

  Serena had never really hung out with Nash and me much when we were younger. She was a little too girly for playing in the mud or trying to catch tadpoles; instead she would stay inside playing with dolls. It was weird to see her all grown up and with a kid.

  I turned around, finding Nash sprawled out on his bed, one hand resting on his flat, tan stomach and the other tucked behind his head as he watched me with a grin. I stood there awkwardly until he patted the empty spot next to him, and I hesitantly sat down, closest to the edge as possible.

  “What’s the matter, Della? You look extremely nervous. I know this is a different room, but don’t you remember we used to have sleepovers all the time? Nothing to be nervous about, I promise I won’t bite.”

  I kicked off my shoes, easing myself in next to him. “I know, Nash, but we’re a little bit older now. You have a girlfriend, and I just don’t want things to be awkward. Things change, you know?”

  “Sorry, Della. I guess I never thought of it that way, I just see you as my best friend.” He reached over to pat my arm and I felt my stomach drop just a little. All he saw me as was his best friend? I guess I should feel better that he didn’t have any feelings for me so I didn’t have to worry about Mariah, but the years we had spent apart seemed to change both of us.

  I was now looking at Nash in a different light; if he weren’t taken I would practically be head over heels in love with him by now. I shook my head clearing those kinds of thoughts. “So weren’t you going to challenge me to a game of pool or something? I think you really need a good ass kicking.” He jumped up quickly, rolling over my body to stand up and tug me along with him. “How could I forget?”

  I followed him down stairs where two boys were now occupying the chairs in the living room. “Hey guys, this is Della. Della, Nick and Steve. They’re the causes for the mess around here.” He picked up a pool stick, handing it to me before pulling out the rack to set the balls up.

  “This is the famous Della?” The one Nash had pointed out as Nick, stood up, studying me with his eyes. “No wonder you talked about her all the time. I wish I had grown up with someone like you.” He gave me a big wink as he grabbed a pool stick. “How ‘bout we play against you?”

  I shrugged my shoulders even though Nash was giving him some kind of look that I couldn’t quite figure out. “Sure, just be prepared to get your ass kicked.” The guys let me break, and the balls only scattered slightly. I was a little rusty since the last time I had played had probably been with Nash.

  “Think we should have done a practice game first,” Nash whispered in my ear as I leaned over the table, looking for my shot. I jumped at the warmth of his breath that tickled my ear, which only caused me to run into him, our bodies colliding.

  “Here, let me help.” He positioned himself behind me, wrapping one arm around my waist and the other around to help me position the stick. My hands were shaky as his covered mine at the closeness of our bodies, but somehow I managed to actual
ly hit a ball this time with his guidance and made it into one of the pockets.

  “There you go, just needed some of my magic touch to get you all straightened out.” He pulled away, our bodies losing contact, and I instantly missed it. I stood up straight and looked up only to find Nick and Steve staring at me with a look of shock on both of their faces. We managed to finish out the rest of the game without any more help from Nash but ended up getting beat in the end.

  “Hey, Della since we won and all, I think you owe me something.” Nick, the flirtier of the two, commented as I was gathering up my stuff to leave.

  “Oh, really?” I replied casually, even though I really didn’t care that he thought I owed him something. He reminded me of the guys I went to high school with, and those were definitely the kind to avoid.

  “Yeah, I could take you out tomorrow night. Best date of your life.”

  “That is not going to happen,” Nash interrupted, putting his hand at the small of my back to guide me towards the front door. “Della all ready has plans with me, and even if she didn’t, she’s too good for you.”

  He opened the door for me, and I looked back at Nick who had a dumbfounded expression on his face. “Dude, not cool.”

  I laughed as I followed Nash out to the driveway, and he helped me into his truck. “What was that all about? I didn’t know we had any plans tomorrow night.”

  “Well we do, that is, if you want. Plus, you need to stay away from guys like Nick. Trust me, he has a different girl over almost every night. I have to hear that shit all the time.” His hand landed on my thigh as he backed out of the driveway and turned down the road back towards the dorms. It remained there the short drive back and even when he pulled the truck into park outside of my dorm I had directed him to.

  “So if I was looking for a guy and since you think all of them are too big of assholes for me, who exactly would you recommend,” I asked through the darkness, the glint of the overhead light reflecting off of his glimmering eyes as he stared back at me.

  “Della…” All he said was my name before he slid across the seat, bringing one hand up to cup my chin as he stared back into my eyes. “I don’t want to see you with any of those guys, because I wish it was me.”

  I sucked in a deep breath at his admission, never breaking the intense stare he was giving me. I could tell he was going to kiss me and I did nothing to stop it. Kissing Nash was like nothing I had ever experienced before. It was like time stopped the moment he gently touched his lips to mine. Nothing else mattered except for the two of us.

  I threaded my hands around the back of his neck, pulling him closer as he gently pried my mouth open, and I sighed when our tongues met. It was like this explosion of stars when it happened, and I reveled in the sweet taste of him as we explored each other’s mouth. He grabbed my waist with both hands, never breaking our kiss, as he pulled me on top of him to straddle him. Our groans filled the small cab of the truck and when I felt a hardness beneath me, I began to rock back and forth slowly.

  “Whoa.” We both pulled back abruptly when we realized exactly what was happening. All that was separating us from going any further was the thin leggings I had on and Nash’s athletic shorts. “Nash, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get so carried away.”

  “No, Della. It’s not your fault, its mine. That shouldn’t have happened.” His hands gripped my waist again but this time to set me back down gingerly onto the passenger seat. I instantly missed the feel of his body beneath mine. “And It won’t happen ever again,” he said, staring straight ahead out the front window.

  “Okay,” I replied quietly, feeling rejected, even though I knew I shouldn’t feel that way. What we had done was wrong. Nash had a girlfriend and although I thought she was a royal B, did not mean it was all right for Nash and me to mess around behind her back.

  I moved to open the door but Nash covered my hand quickly with his. “Della, I don’t want this to change things between us. I still want us to be friends even if we…have these feelings for each other. Do you think we can do that?”

  I looked back at those big brown eyes that were pleading with me. I knew I should just tell him to forget it but I couldn’t. “Sure, Nash,” I answered weakly. “I’ll see you later.” He finally dropped his hand, and I made my way out of his truck. My mind was numb as I pulled my keys out of my purse and pushed open the door to my dorm.

  “Hey, Della, have a nice time with -” Callie’s perky voice caught off abruptly as I kicked my heeled boots off and dropped down onto the couch. “Oh no, something happened between the two of you didn’t it?”

  She sat down cross-legged next to me and gave me a concerned look. “I knew this was going to happen, I could just tell Nash had more than just friends feelings towards you. And you do too, right?” She reached over to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear that had escaped my high ponytail.

  I quickly shook my head, not even wanting to think about it “You know what? It really doesn’t matter. Nash spelled it out pretty clearly tonight that we would only be friends, so I’m not going to waste my time dwelling on the what-ifs.” Callie opened her mouth like she was going to argue with me but quickly shut it, jumping up to clap her hands.

  “All right then, well I hope you’re starving because Zoey practically ordered everything off the Chinese menu and should be on her way back by now. We are in need of some major pigging out.” I smiled at her enthusiasm and let her pull me up and into the kitchen. At least I had these two girls that seemed to always be there for me, even in the short time we had known each other, more than pretty much anyone in my life ever had.

  Chapter 10

  My enthusiasm for my new job was quickly dwindling when I showed up Thursday afternoon and saw the ‘uniform’ that was required. All Brian had told me when he hired me was to wear a pair of black shorts or a skirt, and he would give me my work shirt when I got there to train.

  This could most definitely not be considered a shirt.

  I pulled at the black halter top that basically ended right below my ribs, hoping it would somehow magically grow in length, but that unfortunately didn’t happen. Oh well, at least my stomach was flat and I still had most of my tan leftover for the summer. Tips should be rolling in my way.

  I walked out of the employee only bathroom and heard a sharp whistle the second I turned into the kitchen. “Damn, I didn’t know we had a new waitress.” I sucked in a breath when that familiar cocky voice reached my ears and I looked up, meeting those gray eyes that I had been avoiding pretty well for the most part.

  Judging by his tight fitting white t-shirt with the words Shorty’s scrawled across it, I was guessing that was going to be pretty hard. It was just my luck that I would get a job and he would work here.

  I pursed my lips at him, considering what exactly to say to him. I really didn’t want to start off my first day on the job being known as the bitch, but I also knew if I was nice to him he would consider that flirting. Justin stepped an inch closer, smirking at me while reaching out to flick the dangling belly button ring I had on today.

  “Brian, I thought I told you I was supposed to be interviewing all new potential employees,” he yelled out to the front. “Doesn’t matter anyway, I would have definitely hired you,” he whispered into my ear. “How could I resist seeing this almost every day?” He outlined my body with his hands and I pushed into his chest quickly. “Ugh, please tell me this is your last day of working here, because if it isn’t, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with this.”

  “Sorry to deliver the bad news, sweetheart, but I’m Brian’s favorite. I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. I’m sure we can figure out a way to…work together.” That twisted smirk remained on his face, and it really made me want to hurl. I had no idea how he and his ego both even fit through the front door.

  “Justin, are you bothering Della all ready? You know the rules around here since the last situation we had to deal with. Do I need to remind you?” Brian gave Justin a sharp look, and I coul
dn’t help but giggle at the sheepish look on his face as his eyes finally cast downwards away from my body. I could only imagine what the ‘situation’ was that Justin had been involved in.

  “So, Della, Kassie’s out front, she’ll help you out for the day. Learn the menu, learn the cash register, and be quick on your feet. If you can get those three by the end of the day, you should be good to go for the weekend. Think you can manage?”

  “Of course,” I answered quickly, even though I was suddenly really nervous. I introduced myself to Kassie who was a petite Asian girl with sleek black hair and almond shaped eyes. Her size definitely didn’t stunt her speed though; I had to work quickly to keep my long legs up with hers.

  She explained to me that the place got pretty busy on Thursdays night because of the fifty cent boneless wing special they had, but she handled it all effortlessly. I wasn’t sure I could do it by myself, but by the end of the night she had given me a few of my own tables, and I had a feeling I all ready had a few repeat customers in my favor. I couldn’t believe the tips I had stuffed in my pockets for basically working an hour on my own.

  I stepped out of the restaurant just after midnight, exhausted, but feeling good about myself for finally having earned my own money. “And where do you think you’re going?” I stiffened immediately when I heard a voice behind me, but relaxed just a little when I saw that it was Justin and watched as he snubbed his cigarette out with the tip of his boot.

  “Well, I figured I would go work the street corners for awhile,” I replied with a roll of my eyes, crossing my arms over my bare stomach. For some reason, I hadn’t thought to switch out shirts before Brian locked up for the night, and I was now paying for it.

  “Really? Which one? I’ll be sure to be your only customer.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, following me down the sidewalk as I made my way back towards the direction of the dorms.

  “Funny. I’m just heading back home for the night, you can leave me alone now.”