The Devil Inside (Wolf Guard Book 1)

by Roxanne Lee

  She tensed to spring towards the moronic Alpha but was halted by the sight of an eight foot Captain already leaping at the man still unfortunately in human form. A deafening roar shook the building and several more guards poured through the heavy wooden doors at their leaders call. Charlie grabbed hold of Sam and threw him over a giant shoulder. The sight of a six and a half foot ageing man, hanging onto Charlie's back, as he ran to drop him behind my wolf's large frame would bring me happy thoughts for weeks to come.

  My wolf stood in silence watching the man that confused her so much, dig all ten of his claws into the Alpha's chest. Blood poured down the blue shirt he wore and a choking sound came from his throat as he coughed at the destruction of his lungs. His flailing body was lifted from the ground and suspended over Carver's head before the claws were retracted and he fell to the blooded mat.

  The newly arrived guards stared in calm muteness as they watched their Captain once again dig his claws into the blondes chest and return with his heart clenched firmly in his palm. They saw the dying man gasp for air trying to use lungs that no longer worked and pump a vital organ that just moments ago he had possessed but was now just empty space.

  Carver dropped the useless heart to the floor and grabbed a handful of that mop of blonde hair. Bright crimson red claws fisted around the dead man's neck and tore his throat out in a completely unnecessary display of violence. He dropped the torn flesh to join the heart on the ground and went back for more with those talons. His head was swiftly removed from his body and the Captain's raging eyes turned to my wolf, still mutely watching the scene in front of her.

  He stalked towards her, Alex's head hanging from bloody claws. She cocked her head to the side at the giant wolf approaching her and stared in bewilderment as he dropped the head at her feet, standing straight and tall, proudly waiting for acknowledgement of his gift.

  I sat dumbfounded in the maze that was the animal's mind. I had receded to a tiny space within, watching the massacre and quietly admiring the ease in which Carver had destroyed the Alpha, but I left my wolf to her own devices as he dropped the head, I had no response of my own for that.

  A moment of silence and she finally moved. She circled the grotesque present and sniffed at the blood pooling beneath it. Satisfied in its most definitely dead state, she peered at the massive wolf and chuffed a small delicate sound, almost on par with a purr. She swung her large body around the mammoth legs that stood in her way and walked towards the exiting doors, a tiny flick of her tail rubbing against the Captain's skin as she padded on heavy paws passed a small gathering of grinning guards.

  Chapter 21.

  My wolf finally gave way to human a few hours later, when the woods to the rear of the encampment were swallowed by a blanket of night, a silent cover of soot only broken every so often by scuffling night creatures. The animal population of Carver's forest had diminished quite a bit, my wolf had been thwarted twice now and she decided to take her murderous urges out on smaller prey.

  While she dined on rabbits, foxes and unseeing badgers not quick enough to bury themselves in the cold dirt, I sat in my glass box buried within her mind humming to a symphony of cracking bones and tearing flesh. I avoided watching her rather gluttonous eating habits and instead thought on Carver's actions tonight. A head. Who exactly gives you a head?

  I couldn't deny the impact it had on both myself and the animal. We were simultaneously confused, wary and oddly impressed. The gift and the man catered to my darker side, the part that appreciated his strength, power and protectiveness. That he ended an Alpha's life so easily for a slight many would shrug off, caught my interest as nothing else could. It was a show of intent; that he would never allow me to be hurt and would slaughter any that tried. It was unimaginable how that appealed to me, the feeling of safety it lent me was something I'd never felt before, not even with my father. He was a missile at my back, a sharpshooter aimed at anything in my way, an assassin that wrapped me in the soft embrace of immunity.

  I found myself trusting that overgrown Captain. Just a little, a minuscule amount that was hardly noticeable, but trust all the same. It wasn't part of my plan and I hadn't accounted for any of the people now in my life. It's a baffling moment when you realise no matter how concrete you'd made that charred heart it was never enough. Smart people don't force their way in, moment by moment they slip through all the barriers and traps that had seemed so impenetrable and snatch a part of you that you hadn't realised was free to give away.

  The fur tried to melt away while I was still in the forest. My wolf though understood my opinion on naked and pushed hard to return to the house before I could no longer hold that giant shape. I could smell Sam on the porch as I neared, whisky and spice that smothered me in contentment, a peaceful kind of surrender began with the emergence of human pushing through animal. He threw a robe my way as my form twisted shapes in front of him and he turned his back as I dressed quickly.

  "Ya kill anythin'?"

  I snorted at him, "just small animals today."

  Sam’s little grin was as infectious as usual,"proud of ya, girlie." He held up a tumbler of whiskey and I gratefully accepted and sat next to him on white rocking chairs.

  The night had turned bitter in its lost sun and I blew out breaths that fogged on every exhale. The blood running through me warmed my skin in higher degrees than before I'd shifted, that beast burning through calories at a phenomenal rate to keep the heat constant. It would have been useful when I'd been stuck in that nightie turning numb on the concrete floor, but it was some kind of wonderful to know I'd never feel that listless chill again.

  I looked at Sam out of the corner of my eye, "so...how was your ride on Charlie?"

  Sam grimaced and I hid my smile behind the crystal tumbler. "Man needs ta learn boundaries, I have legs ya know."

  I spluttered as I tried to swallow around my smile and he sniffed in scorn."Dunno why ya so amused, ya Captain gave ya a severed head. Think I win."

  I rolled my eyes at him,"it was quite thoughtful actually."

  Sam chuckled, "Oh yeah, no' at all unbalanced. Least we know he as crazy as you are."

  I hummed in response, he might just be right about that."Where is he anyway?"

  "Had ta go smooth things over wit' those damn governors, they no' too happy he killed tha Alpha they only jus' appointed."

  "Well maybe they should stop appointing shitty Alphas."

  Sam chuckled again and clinked his glass with mine, "Yeah ain't tha righ'." He looked at me for a while and lost his smile a little, "ya know they probly goin' ta wanna meet you. He can' say no if he wanna keep tha peace 'round here."

  "What, they're here?"

  Sam nodded at me, "yeah, came in this mornin', either for tha Alpha or you no' sure which."

  I raised an eyebrow," Why me?"

  "You tha captains mate," Sam shrugged, "and they know ya killed tha first Alpha, why wouldn' they wanna meet ya?"

  I suppose he had a point, maybe I should stop drawing such attention to myself. "When?"

  "Soon, ya man be comin' back in an hour or so, he'll know."

  I huffed at him, "he's not my man."

  Sam laughed loudly and his eyes glinted with mirth," he gave ya a head girlie, tha's courtin' ta tha Captain."

  I squinted my eyes at him in distaste as he stood from his creaky chair, "Come on, picked up a barbecue grill from tha Hall, I'll make ya sum steak, migh' get tha' sour look off ya face."

  I followed him into the house, greeting the dogs at the front door. Luce sniffed at me and wandered off to follow Sam into the kitchen while Remy shoved his head into my side and batted me until I rubbed that thick skull. I left my hand on the scruff of his neck while we joined Sam and Luce in the kitchen and I silently promised him I'd leave the lock off my bedroom door later, all while shaking my head at myself at how deeply that dog had wormed his way in.

  Carver returned early, half way during Sam’s grilling and I saw him take a grateful, deep inhale at the smell dist
ributing though the house. His eyes locked with mine and his steps never once faltered as he strode confidently to the counter I was leaning on and dipped his head to breathe in my hair. His huge frame completely surrounded me and I shivered at that overwhelming atmosphere. Like being encased in a cinnamon flavoured tornado, he wrapped me in wildness and stilled the storm at my centre. I allowed him his moment before stiffening at his proximity, I'd given a lot in the last day and I needed to take a step back before moving forward.

  Sam nodded at Carver and picked up an extra paper plate from his stash of supplies next to the grill. He'd managed to steal half a dozen large steaks complete with baby potatoes that he had frying with garlic in a pan on the corner of the grill. Either he'd pulled rank using Carver's name or he'd seriously sweet talked the women in the kitchens to get that haul.

  Carver backed up a few inches but remained close enough to touch. I felt his gaze constantly on me and it warmed every spot he settled on. I was afraid to look at him too much, it seemed his wolf was invariably just beneath the surface and it only made his dark look even more so. Shadows under his cheekbones highlighted the stark beauty of his face and I found myself too often caught up in following every precise line.

  His husky voice fluttered over my skin, "You okay, cherry?"

  I peered at him making sure to look at his eyes so that I wasn't tempted to look at the rest of him, "yes thank you, I'm fine."

  He rumbled at me and sniffed the air around me,"you smell good."

  I raised an eyebrow,"what?"

  He gave a little half grin and tilted his head, "did I tell you that you smell like cherries to me? Matches your hair."

  I frowned at him and let the subject drop, I was more interested in the food that Sam was cooking, an ache had started that hollowed my stomach until I felt ill. I guess that long shift had burned more than I'd eaten today, small woodland creatures included. Carver walked to the grill and stood behind Sam as he turned the cooking meat. I knew what that presence behind you felt like and I wasn't surprised when Sam turned to look at him in question.

  "She's hungry." Carver grunted at him in answer.

  Sam chuckled that deep laugh, "'Cause you standin' ova' my shoulder goin' ta make them steaks cook quicker righ'?"

  Carver grunted again and moved back a step, he was the epitome of a caveman at the moment, I could only assume his meeting had been frustrating enough to leave the wolf skimming under his skin, pushing and probing for release.

  Sam asked my question for me, "how'd tha meetin' go?"

  Carver grimaced, "they want to meet you Arya, I told them they'd have to wait on you but they’re holding Lane's appointment over me."

  I stared at Carver,"Lane? They're appointing Lane?"

  Carver looked at me completely seriously, "yes I put him forward, he'll make one hell of an Alpha and he'll certainly sort that pack out."

  I stared at him some more,"but seriously, Lane?"

  Carver grinned, "he's one of my best guards and the responsibility will be good for him, that wolf enjoys pain a little too much."

  I frowned at his answer, people who said they liked pain rarely knew what real pain was.

  I took a plate from Sam as he dished up the food and we all stood at the counter eating with plastic forks while the dogs got paper plates of their own. Sam’s cooking had quickly become a favourite of mine and I'd already gained quite a bit of the lost weight back, I felt healthier, stronger and I enjoyed the feeling that I was rubbishing Daniel's rules on my size, a little bit of rebellion even if it was just in my head.

  I looked up at Carver as I finished eating, his eyes were infrequently away from me, as if he couldn't force them away in case I wasn't there when they returned. "I'll go, to meet the governors. How bad can they be right?"

  Carver growled low in his throat, "they won't come near you."

  I smiled at him, a completely sincere expression that seemed to have him lost for words,

  "I know they won't; you'll be there."

  Chapter 22.

  That night I dreamed. A remarkable construction of subconscious thought. Fireflies dancing in the deepest chasm, knitting together strands of broken light, crossing wires until all that remains is some contorted version of reality. I dreamed of Carver, a faceless group of robed old men holding down the man that should have been powerful enough to break free. I dreamed of my wolf, caged within a broken body, my jade eyes watching the scene without remorse. I dreamed of knives cutting into creamy skin, muscles and tendons straining in agony. I dreamed of bottomless, ebony eyes staring into mine filled with guilt and accusation.

  When I woke I sat in the huge bed that was now mine, a black snoring beast beside me. Birds called out in dawn's fresh day and I watched as the world restarted once more. The day was starting out perfect, the weather perfect for the season, the lazy wakening world perfect. It was with almost panic that I realised exactly what I was being given on a plate. A moment of full alertness in understanding this perfect life I was being sucked into, how easily it could all be taken away, stolen from right beneath my fingertips.

  As I calmed my racing brain in its disaster predictions, I was left with niggling thoughts that I could not shake. I had spent two weeks in this new life, two weeks. How had I fallen so easily? Maybe fate had just been waiting for my release to drop all these people on me. Or maybe, what I thought had been anger and distrust was simply just a mask. Was I in fact so desperate for companionship that I'd thrown my trust at the first people that crossed my path?

  Sam. Did he just find me? I had fallen right into his grasp. He took me to his cabin, lay a pretty story at my feet and gave me what I'd been missing; a home. Was it a deep seated need to belong? Had I been taken in so easily because under layers of hate and soul burning resentment I was just the girl I'd always been, one who'd had her life stolen for a moment and only begged to have it returned. I was turning everything over, sifting through events that led up to me being here, with an appointment to meet governors in a few days that I'd never before had the intention of seeing.

  And Carver, I think I can trust that he is supposed to be mine. After all I doubt my wolf would be so hesitant to kill the man otherwise. But Sam knew him, had met him before. He'd known the guards I'd been introduced to, Charlie and Duncan and Lane. I killed the Alpha and Carver killed the next and now Lane is perfectly placed to be the next appointment. Carver now has his hand in another pie, how many packs does he control?

  Sam has secrets, ones he doesn’t want known. Have I placed myself in the middle of someone else's plan, only to be a pawn in a larger game? I felt as though I were juggling, possibilities thrown in the air, turning and spinning until all sides are shown. I didn’t want to doubt Sam. He's been a constant in my new world, him and the two brutes he owns. Having spent four years inside my head; pain, then grief, then anger, then acceptance and finally a twisted adaptation of who I once was. I believe I'm smarter then what I began as. Living with only thoughts and planning tends to focus the mind, but am I smart enough?

  Was such carefully laid trust my greatest mistake?

  I forced myself to move, I wasn't finding answers sat in this room and I now had a training plan, starting this morning with Charlie. I would play the game, I would train with the guards and talk with Carver and see how this all panned out, I'll watch the people planted before me and take what they give me; enough tutelage to revisit Daniel, to satisfy the bloodthirsty yearning entombed in precarious feelings of safety.

  I made my way to the kitchen, Sam’s movements slow and methodical as they reached my sensitive ears. I heard Carver in his shower and picked up marching footsteps from the crushed gravel surrounding the house, guards on first watch. I followed Remy as he ambled towards the aroma of Sam making breakfast. More sweet talking kitchen staff for supplies I presumed. I stood in the doorway for long moments spying on the old man I'd come to share so much with. It produced an ache deep within, a torturous tearing of an organ only just rebuilding. If Sam wasn't w
ho I thought he was, I think it would accomplish what four years with Daniel had not; a broken, decimated girl.

  "You goin' ta stand there all day, girlie?"

  I sighed at that accent full of lilts and fractured words, "No. I'm coming."

  *************

  Carver dropped me off at the training room an hour after breakfast. He had meetings all morning with men I hadn't met. On the way over he'd informed me there were forty guards in this enclosure, ten of them mated and living in the separate houses we'd passed on the way in and the rest in a large barrack behind the dining hall. There was another site just behind this one, accessed by a break in the wall somewhere near the guard's quarters, that held another hundred or so men. The forty in this community were Carver's own personal team, membership of which was hard fought for and won in matches based on brute strength, cunning and loyalty. I was impressed with the stringent rules he placed on those under his command, when Sam said the Captain ruled with iron, he hadn't been exaggerating. Not a single action happened without Carver's express permission and I understood the commitment placed on those who pledged to his leadership. It really was living and dying by the sword, there was no room for manoeuvring his commands.

  The governors I was due to meet were not permitted to stay within the walls of Carver's site and as such were currently housed in the tourist hotels of Colwyn Bay, some five miles away from here. I was pleased with his sharing of information, it made my doubt lessen slightly and my thoughts less troubled. He left me with a look inside to ensure Charlie was taking over my security detail and a whispering kiss to the side of my head, again fast enough that he was already striding away before I realised he'd gotten under my defences. I scowled at his retreating back, promising myself I'd pay more attention to where his mouth was going in future and stepped into the training room.