by Pamela Lynne
Chapter Thirty
* * *
“I do not see why you should go to London, Kitty. When Jane returns, there will be parties and balls enough. You girls are entirely qualified to recommend yourselves to society, no matter what Mr. Darcy says.”
“To Meryton society, perhaps, Mama, though we have not seen much of it lately. No one has come round for many weeks, and we receive no invitations. The only one we have received has been from Mr. Darcy.”
“For a year from now.” Lydia flopped down onto the sofa, crossing her arms across her chest. “And only if we behave properly, whatever that means.”
“Whatever it means, Lydia, do you not think we should comply? However else are we to meet eligible gentlemen? There are none here. The militia will soon depart, and we will be left with farmers and shopkeepers.”
“Your sisters married well, did they not? I suppose I had nothing to do with that? Did they not learn how to manage a house from me? Did I not tell Jane how to lure a man with a smile and a becoming look? How Lizzy managed to trap Mr. Darcy I shall never know. I suspect we will see that she is increasing while she is here. We would all have been better off if she had married Mr. Collins. At least he never looked down on the rest of us.”
“No, just down our gowns,” Lydia mumbled.
“You will not be going to London. Jane will return soon. We will live at Netherfield, and she will see that you all are introduced to other rich men. Mr. Bingley has friends whom he could invite here, I am sure. Oh, girls, such things you will have. I know Mr. Bingley will be a generous brother.”
Mrs. Bennet would not regulate her voice though she knew full well Mr. Darcy was likely within hearing range. The Darcys had been back at Longbourn for three weeks, and while Elizabeth tended her father, Darcy and Georgiana were privy to Mrs. Bennet’s ravings about Jane and Mr. Bingley’s far superior manners. She was in no doubt of her reception at Netherfield and Jane’s imminent return, though she had heard nothing confirming either.
“Miss Darcy says her brother is very generous. Indeed, she is very elegant and has lovely gowns and very fine manners.”
Lydia rolled her eyes but had nothing to say. She would never admit it, but she thought those same things about Georgiana, though the young lady made it very clear what she thought of Lydia.
“You are very vulgar,” she had said to Lydia the day she arrived. “No wonder my brother did not want to bring you to London. You would have made us a laughing stock.”
Lydia was shocked to hear those words. She had been criticized for her behavior before, but she had always been able to shrug off Elizabeth and Jane without much thought. Georgiana was different. Peer pressure can be a powerful thing and can give pause where no thought had been given before. Though doubt had begun to worm its way into her confidence, one does not shed a lifetime of practice in a few days. She still heeded her mother’s insistence that being beautiful and lively was enough. It was much easier to listen to those who flattered her vanity than to those who expected more.
“What does she know anyway? I agree with Mama. Bingley will make a much better brother and will introduce us to London society. Those snotty Darcys can keep to themselves for all I care.”
Mrs. Bennet wore a satisfied smirk while Lydia sank further in her seat and played with her sleeves while she convinced herself she was correct. Kitty was not convinced, however. She was a follower by nature. In the past, she would have adhered to her mother’s and sister’s words as if they were gospel, but she had a new superior in Georgiana and decided to follow her lead instead.
“With Uncle’s permission, I will go to London. I think you are wrong, Lydia. You and Mama are the only ones who have confidence in Jane and Mr. Bingley. Mr. Darcy and Lizzy and even our aunt and uncle do not hold him in regard. How can we be sure they will be useful to us? Do you not remember Jane’s behavior before she left for London? She had become quite cruel.”
“That was because of your father,” Mrs. Bennet spit out with much ire. “It was his actions that turned Jane cruel, if she was. He is the reason why she has not returned. Once this whole affair is over, she will come home, and all will be well.”
A maid entered then with the post and handed it to Mrs. Bennet. It was her habit to inspect the letters that came to the house, but at least she stopped short of reading them.
“Mary has another letter from her gentleman friend, I see. If she danced with a viscount, why is she being courted by a parson? Hmm and one from Kent as well.”
She flipped through the rest of the letters, most of which were for her brother or Darcy, and stopped at one that was dirtied and smudged so bad that she could not read the direction. The maid saw her questioning look and answered before she had a chance to ask.
“That one was found in the kitchen, ma’am, when they moved the hutch for cleaning.”
“Thank you, that will be all,” Mrs. Bennet said dismissively as she handed her the rest of the letters. She examined the one in her hand for a moment and then picked up the letter opener and broke the seal. Unfolding it, she saw words written in a familiar hand. My Dearest Lizzy.
********
Darcy exhaled a long breath as he leaned back in the chair and rubbed his forehead. It had been a long three weeks, filled with death, faulty ledgers, and two whiny Bennet ladies with nothing to do but complain—loudly. He leaned forward and picked up one of the records he had been studying, trying to find what was missing.
“Why are you working so hard on this, Darcy? Another day or two and this will all belong to Collins.” Mr. Gardiner had come from London a few days prior when he learned that Collins had come to Longbourn expecting to stay. Lady Catherine had dismissed him upon her return to Kent, and though she did not bother to try to rescind the living, she was able to communicate her displeasure so effectively that he left without incident.
When he arrived at Longbourn, the residents there barely recognized him. Over the weeks since they last saw him, he had lost a great deal of weight, due mostly to the broken jaw he acquired in London. He was refused admittance, and he recoiled quickly at the sight of Darcy, who had Remy follow him to see where he went. The footman reported back that Collins had received a warm welcome from the Lucas family and would remain there until it was time for him to take over Longbourn.
“Yes, but until then, it is Elizabeth’s. Her blood is in this place, and I cannot stand that it has been left in this condition. As long as it remains hers, I will work to make it better. It may be that we find something they can take with them, even if it is only a few pounds. If it is owed them, they should have it.”
Mr. Gardiner studied the young man sitting across from him and marveled at how life had somehow brought him to Elizabeth. He was so different from Mr. Bennet and even himself. He was happy for his niece and grateful that she loved a man who was far better than the ones who raised her.
“Uncle?”
“Forgive me, Darcy. I was lost in thought. Lizzy may not have had a father who was worthy of respect or admiration, but I am glad to know that her children will. Can we leave the ledgers for a bit and discuss what will happen with the girls?”
Darcy cleared his throat, thankful Mr. Gardiner gave him something to focus on rather than the emotions that his praise had brought forth.
“Mary insists on staying with her mother for some reason, and Mrs. Bennet refuses to consider anywhere other than Netherfield.” He picked up a letter from the desk and handed it to his uncle.
“Bingley responded to my letter and said she is welcome to stay as long as she likes, though they do not plan on being in residence for quite some time.”
“Why lease an estate if he has no plans to live there?”
“If I had to guess, I would say he is avoiding his sister. She is not on good terms with their relations, so as long as he stays with them, he is safe.”
“While I can understand wanting to avoid bothersome sisters, at some point he will have to be a man. If he wants to make Jane happy, tha
t is.”
“I doubt he has it in him, Uncle. What about Catherine? Will she go back with you to London?”
“Yes, if she wishes. Did Georgiana speak to you about her plans?”
Darcy sighed. His sister approached him earlier that day expressing a desire to return to London instead of Pemberley as they had planned. She felt she could be of use to Kitty and perhaps even Lydia if they went to live with the Gardiners. He suspected she also wished to give him and Elizabeth time alone.
“I have spent so much time away from her. I was looking forward to finally being a family. I will allow her to go, but only for a little while. Perhaps after Aunt Maddy has worked her magic on the girls, they can stay with us until the next season begins.”
“The girls? Does that include Lydia?”
Darcy looked down to another letter sitting on the desk. He looked back up, and the corners of his mouth raised slightly.
“Actually, I have something else in mind.”
********
Elizabeth wrung the excess water out of a cloth and placed it on her father’s head. He did not have a fever, near as she could tell, but the cold cloth on his skin seemed to calm him. As she ran the cloth over his face, she remembered him as he was—or rather, how she perceived him before all that happened last autumn. The body that lay before her was one of a stranger. Rather than regret what he truly was, she chose to be grateful for all he had given her. She had grown up in a safe environment with a roof over her head and food in her stomach. She was made to feel important and was educated in a way that most girls were not, helping to create the person whom would eventually become: Mrs. Darcy.
He remained in a deep sleep most of the time and awakened only enough to occasionally call for his wife. She would not come, and Elizabeth would not attempt to persuade her. As much as she wished her mother would be better and rise above her disappointments, she could allow this bit of resentment. Her bruises had healed, but the humiliation could not be overcome in such a short time, and not for a connection that had always been weak.
As she brought the cloth down to his neck and then his arms, she noticed a change in his breathing. She watched his chest rise only slightly, taking in a shallow breath, and then fall. She continued to watch for several moments, holding her own breath as she realized her father had just taken his last. That was it. There was no apology, no great declaration of love or regret, just a gradual fading. She closed her eyes, and as the tears came, she said a silent prayer of thanks, grateful that his suffering had ended. She left her seat and raised the sheet over his head. She then turned to exit the room and find her husband.
********
“Are you sure you will not come to London with us, Mary?” Georgiana had asked her this several times over the last hour, believing, if she were persistent enough, her friend would acquiesce. “I do hate the idea of you staying here.”
The three younger Bennet girls and Georgiana sat in the drawing room, waiting for the men to return from the funeral. Elizabeth had taken tea to her mother, who had not been downstairs since just before Mr. Bennet’s death. She was unusually quiet and, for the first time they could all remember, preferred solitude. The girls were suitably solemn, but each was anxious for the next chapter of her life to begin.
“No, Georgie, I have no desire to be in London at present, nor do I wish to be in Kent. Richard and Anne will travel to town soon in any case. There is no point in making such a short trip.”
Darcy and Anne had been sensitive enough not to mention it, but Mary had learned through a letter from Lady Catherine that Sebastian was to marry within a month. She reached for her friend’s hand to silence her before she could protest further.
“I want to be here, Georgie. I will be fine.”
“Tell us about your beau, Mary. Is he very handsome?” Kitty asked.
Mary looked at the letter she had just received from Mr. Elliot. It was the third he had written so far, and she felt she was getting to know him very well. He was not trying to hide anything and wrote freely of his life and his love for his wife and grief for their child. He knew what it was to long for a life that could never be yet had managed to carry on and live a life of purpose. She felt after his first letter that they would get along well, and by the time she finished his third, she knew they would be good partners. It was nice to have his letters, to be able to take them out during moments of doubt. She had an ending, a calm after the storm; she just had to heal before she could get there.
“He is very kind and wise. You will like him, I think, Kitty.” Mary said no more, leaving her sisters frustrated with her reticence. Kitty then turned to her other sister who was also being uncharacteristically quiet.
“Lydia, what did you and Mr. Darcy talk about this morning? Are they allowing you to go to London?”
Lydia stared at her for a moment then rose from her chair and stomped to the window. She drew her shoulders back and raised her chin before turning back to the others.
“No, they are not. They are sending me to Kent.”
Mary and Georgiana looked at each other in bewilderment. Mary very kindly bit her lip and looked away, but Georgia gave no such consideration. She laughed out loud then looked to an astonished Lydia.
“Oh, my brother has proven himself to be brilliant indeed. You may be uneducated and vulgar now, dear Lydia, but you will be something else altogether after a few weeks with Lady Catherine.”
Lydia watched in confused horror as Georgiana rose and embraced her tightly before quitting the room with her laughter trailing behind.
********
The next day, Fanny Bennet sat in her chamber and stared into the space, deep in thought. Her life at Longbourn was now over. Mr. Collins was wasting no time in claiming his inheritance, and it was now time to become a guest at Netherfield. She had no choice; she had made sure of that. She had been so vocal in her declarations of Jane’s goodness and her desire to have her mother near that even though she now had proof to the contrary, she could not take it all back.
She looked once more at the letter Jane had written to Elizabeth and compared it to the one she had received from Scotland. Elizabeth’s was full of love and remorse while hers held only a cool civility. Mrs. Bennet was not one to pick up on subtleties or tone, but those were unnecessary. The words Jane had written spoke her sentiments openly. As you well know, our household has never been calm or very dignified, as our mother has free rein to do as she pleases . . .we all have different ways to cope with her madness . . . our mother embarrasses us at every social function . . . her shrill voice . . . filling the air with meanness. Her daughter hated her, and she must now be a guest in her home. How was she to face her knowing this, and how was she ever to look her other children in the eyes again?
She folded the letter and placed it in her bag. She looked around the room she had occupied for nearly five and twenty years one last time. Her heart filled with guilt and apprehension as she walked through the door to face her regrets. She hoped she could be better but felt no confidence that she could ever be more than what she was at that moment: broken.
********
“Tell me, Mr. Darcy, how have you reconciled your great pride to your actions of bringing someone barely tolerable to your home to be its mistress?”
“You are never going to let me forget that, are you?” He smiled down at his wife, who rested comfortably in the crook of his arm. She had been quiet and reflective when they first left Longbourn, but the closer they got to home, the more like herself she became.
“I promise, sir, that you will be allowed to forget it the instant that I do.” She smiled impishly, and he could not resist the temptation her lips held at that moment.
“I would not want to forget a single thing, my love, even if the memory brings me pain or embarrassment. Every moment of my life has led me to this one—when I bring my very tempting bride home.”
“You believe we were destined for each other then? We were meant to be together even when you were f
ar more arrogant than gallant and I was steeping in my own prejudice and wounded vanity?”
“Of course,” he stated matter-of-factly. “You cannot deny the connection that was there from the very beginning. No matter how hard we fought it, it was there and was strong, and it was what brought us together again. It was not coincidence that brought us both to the bookstore that day, but fate.”
Elizabeth looked at him intently. He was always so confident, so sure of everything he thought and did. It could be intimidating, even now that they had shared such emotional and physical intimacies. She wanted to be worthy of him and all that he had given her, but there were still times that she had considerable doubts.
There was a slight shift in the road, and Darcy’s smile grew into a broad grin that made her heart soar. She could not keep a sigh from escaping as he looked upon her with tenderness and great joy.
“We are here, Elizabeth. We are at Pemberley.”
Some minutes later, the carriage stopped. Darcy helped his wife descend and took her around to the other side so she could take her first glimpse of the manor house. She gasped as she stepped forward. She had never seen a place for which nature had done more or where natural beauty had been so little counteracted by man.
Her bonnet had been discarded in the carriage, and her hair had come loose from its pins and was blowing slightly in the wind. The connection was there. She felt it strongly then as the wind caressed her, welcoming her home. Her husband was right to be confident in his assertions. You were never meant for Longbourn, she remembered him saying. This was meant to be. This was where she had always belonged.
Darcy looked down upon her at that same time and felt she had never looked more beautiful. He knew what she was feeling, for he had felt it himself every time he went away and came back. He had never realized before, though, that there had been a piece missing. Now that she was there, Pemberley was complete. He was complete. He wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his head on hers as they continued to look upon their home.