by AJ Schippers
Julia smiled contentedly as her hand squeezed the soft surface of whatever was currently under her hand. It felt firm and soft at the same time. Despite being still half-asleep, her squeeze toy was her new favorite thing. She frowned when an unexpected soft moan came out of the toy, and she peeked out one eye to see what it was.
“Shit,” Julia said as she quickly withdrew her hand and placed it on her own stomach. She thanked the gods that Alexandra was still asleep. She would have skinned Julia alive otherwise.
“Hey.”
Fuck. “Hi.”
“Did you cop a feel while I was asleep?” Alexandra chuckled.
Julia burrowed her head beneath Alexandra’s chin. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
“I quite liked it.” Alexandra kissed the top of Julia’s head. “Maybe I’ll let you do that again while you’re actually awake.” She smirked and wiggled her brows when Julia looked at her. “Maybe.”
“This is not at all embarrassing.”
Alexandra pulled Julia on top of her and rubbed her back. When Julia grunted, her hands dipped lower and cupped Julia’s ass. “You’re really naked,” she said as she moved one hand and used it to pull Julia’s head closer to her. “How are you feeling?”
“Good.” Julia smiled. “That was incredible.” At that moment, Julia’s stomach loudly rumbled.
“Hungry?”
“Well, you gave me quite the workout.” Julia lowered her head and hesitantly brought their lips together. She had never initiated a kiss between them before. What if Alexandra pushed her away?
But Alexandra deepened the kiss Julia had started, and Julia rolled her hips against hers, gasping for air when Alexandra’s hand moved from her hair to slip in between their bodies.
“What are you doing?”
“Teasing you.”
Julia’s eyes closed when Alexandra’s hand cupped her sex and she slid a finger along Julia’s wetness.
“Oh my. What do we have here?”
Julia buried her face in Alexandra’s neck. “It’s your fault,” she mumbled. The embarrassment she felt quickly turned into nothing but utter desire as Alexandra flicked her finger against Julia’s clit.
“Look at me,” Alexandra said firmly and smiled when Julia slowly obeyed.
She bit her lip when Alexandra teased her entrance with a finger. “Please.”
“Please what?”
Julia groaned. “Please, Miss.”
“What do you want?” Alexandra used her thumb to rub against Julia’s clit and smiled when she moaned softly.
“Please touch me,” Julia breathed out.
“Like this?” Alexandra mockingly asked as she slipped a finger inside of Julia.
“Yes.”
Alexandra leaned in a bit and nibbled at Julia’s nose. “You know, we don’t really have time for this. I promised I would make dinner, and if I start playing with you…well, I don’t think I’ll want to leave this bed.”
Julia responded by pushing down against the finger inside of her.
“Cheeky girl,” Alexandra said with a grin. Her other hand slowly dragged up Julia’s back until Julia trembled beneath her. “I wonder,” Alexandra said as her fingernails scratched their way down again until she reached the small of Julia’s back, “what would happen,” she gave Julia a chaste kiss on her lips, “if you let me spank you.” Her thumb rubbed faster over the bundle of nerves as her other hand stroked Julia’s ass. “How would you feel about that? Do you want to give it a shot?”
“Just once?”
“Unless you ask for more, yes.”
Julia nodded, and as soon as she did, Alexandra’s hand came crashing down on her ass, and her eyes closed for a mere second as a guttural moan made its way up from deep down within. “Holy shit.” Julia gasped.
Alexandra immediately softened the impact of the blow by rubbing her hand over the stinging skin.
“I think you like it,” Alexandra teased as she bit her lip. “Do you want another one?”
Julia thought it through for a moment. “Yellow.”
Soft fingers kept gently stroking the skin in small circles. “I am proud of you for using that, and I am glad you feel comfortable enough to use it. It means the world to me,” Alexandra said.
“Thanks. I just… I don’t know. I like it, but I don’t want to like it. It still feels weird to me. Does that make sense?”
“Yes, it does, and it’s okay. We’re not going to do anything that you’re not comfortable with. If you would like to try it again, all you have to do is ask, and until then, we won’t.”
“Sometimes I don’t understand how you’re possible,” Julia admitted. “It’s like you see my worst fears, and you take them away with a word here and there. You see straight through me, and it scares me to death.” Julia’s hand traced down Alexandra’s cheek. “Are you real?”
“Yes. Last time I checked I was, anyway.”
Fuck the fears. “Do it again,” Julia pleaded. There was something about the way Alexandra’s eyes seemed to darken at her request that made her stomach flutter. “Please—”
Before she could finish her sentence, Alexandra brought down her hand on Julia’s ass and then immediately rubbed the sting away.
A lip disappeared between Julia’s teeth and she bit down on it hard when Alexandra repeated the motion on the other cheek. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head when the flat surface of Alexandra’s hand was replaced by fingernails that dug into the skin. “More, please.”
Alexandra brought Julia’s mouth closer to hers and lingered for a moment. She kissed her until her lips burned, then pulled back and grinned. “Get dressed. We’re having dinner.”
“What!”
Alexandra rolled Julia on her side and got out of the bed. She extended a hand to Julia, who – with a scowl on her face—took it. Alexandra pulled her into a tight hug. “I am so very proud of you and all that you’ve done today. But right now, I’m very hungry, and I’m going to make dinner. Maybe you should take a shower, and when you’re ready, you can come join me in the kitchen.”
“Can I still sleep with you tonight?” She wrapped her arms tighter around Alexandra.
Alexandra pulled back, her face full of worry. “Why would you think otherwise?”
“Maybe you don’t want me near anymore now that you’ve touched me.”
“You couldn’t be more wrong, Julia.” She cupped Julia’s cheek. “I will be extremely disappointed if you’re not by my side tonight. I want you to curl up in my arms and have the sweetest of dreams, and maybe I’ll wake you up in the middle of the night, like you’ve woken me up so many times, and I’ll tease you some more. Or maybe I’ll let you sleep. But either way, I want you to be with me, understood?”
“Yeah.” Julia smiled.
“Good girl. Now go take that shower, and don’t keep me waiting too long.”
As Alexandra walked out of the room, Julia let herself fall on the bed and closed her eyes. She was still amazed by the progress she and Alexandra had made in the last couple of hours. Whatever she had expected or daydreamed about, Alexandra had exceeded all those things. She had been amazing and—God, Julia loved the way Alexandra teased her and played with her. There was not a moment where she hadn’t felt safe and hadn’t wanted more of it.
“So,” Alexandra drawled as she leaned back in her chair, “who’s going to do the dishes?”
“Not me,” Julia and Nicky said simultaneously, and they exchanged a smile.
“How about a card game to decide who cleans up?” Alexandra suggested.
“Fine,” said Julia. Confidence was key. Alexandra had beat her once. She wasn’t going to let that happen again. “Ella, want to be on the winning team?”
“Sure,” said Ella.
“We’ve played before, haven’t we?” Nicky said to Alexandra. “I remember you cheat, so this game won’t be fair.” She laughed loudly. “I’m in!”
Julia gasped as she looked at Alexandra. “Oh, my God! See! You do che
at. I knew it.”
“I do not,” Alexandra said with a laugh.
“I can’t believe it,” Julia said as she turned sideways in her chair. “Cheater.”
“Hush,” Alexandra said through a cough.
“Alexandra Ortega!” Julia’s voice rose in pitch to match her rising outrage. “Did you cheat when we played for our wager?”
“I did not. I won fair and square, thank you very much.”
Julia narrowed her eyes. “I don’t think I believe you. You owe me breakfast in bed!”
“I owe you nothing, dear. But it’s cute that you think I do.”
“Let’s play.” Julia grabbed the cards from the desk behind her and started shuffling them. “In addition to your little wager, I want to add this condition. If Ella and I win, you tell me the truth on whether you played fair or not.”
“I already told you I won fair and square,” Alexandra grinned. “What do I get when I win?”
“Nothing,” Julia said. “Bragging rights.”
“Fine. We’ll win anyway.”
“You seem way too sure about that.”
“Because we will.” Nicky held out her hand for Alexandra to high-five. “You can’t lose with Alexandra on your team. I’m definitely in.”
“Ella,” Julia said as she eyed her teammate, “how good are you with card games?”
“I have the worst poker face, but I can play well.”
“I think we need rules,” Julia said as she dealt the cards. “First, Alexandra is not allowed to cheat.”
Alexandra snorted. “I told you. I don’t cheat.”
“Also,” Julia slapped away the hand that squeezed her knee, “no distracting me and Ella while we play.”
“I would never,” said Alexandra, returning her hand to her lap.
Nicky wiggled her brows. “I make no promises.”
“Hands above the table at all times!” Julia exclaimed. “That’ll keep you from cheating.” She glanced sideways at Alexandra.
“Sure thing,” Alexandra grabbed her cards and arranged them in an order to her satisfaction in her hand. “So we’re all agreed on the wager?”
Everyone nodded, and Nicky laughed loudly when Alexandra casually ran a hand through her hair before discreetly pulling on an earlobe, then tried to keep a straight face.
“Sheesh, you’ve already started, haven’t you?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Julia.” Alexandra grinned as she put a card on the table. It was immediately followed by another one and another, and Julia sighed deeply.
Julia leaned back in her chair as she sneakily tried to glance at Alexandra’s cards. “So,” she put down a card and waited for Ella to make a move, “queens still beat kings?”
“Always,” Alexandra said.
“Then how the hell did you end up with three queens in your hands already?”
“Julia,” Alexandra said, “no cheating and no glancing at my cards, or I will blindfold you, and trust me, it’s a whole lot more difficult to play when you can’t see a thing.”
Julia tried to come up with a retort, but her mouth was unwilling to produce any words. She snapped her lips shut and just glared at Alexandra.
“Cheater,” she said as Nicky put down two queens on the table and Alexandra added her two queens.
“Call me a cheater one more time, and I will make my threat a reality,” Alexandra said.
“Magic,” Julia said almost inaudibly, and she blushed when Alexandra laughed loudly.
“Oh no, dear. We don’t use that when playing a simple card game.”
“Why not?”
“That’s not how it works.” Alexandra grinned.
Julia was utterly frustrated when an hour later, Nicky and Alexandra had won all their games. She and Ella sighed simultaneously. Julia looked at Nicky and narrowed her eyes, “Did you guys cheat?”
“I’ll never tell, but you may want to strip search Alexandra later.”
“Yes, Julia. You may want to strip search me later.”
Julia licked her dry lips. “Can I?”
“Maybe.”
“Lots of maybes today.” Julia grinned.
“Well,” Alexandra said as she clasped her hands together, “I think Nicky and I have some discussing to do. You two should load the dishwasher while we come up with a plan.”
“But—”
Alexandra held up her hand. “It’s not up for discussion, Julia. Go finish up, and when we’re ready we’ll call for you.” She beckoned Julia closer and whispered in her ear, “Do you trust me?” At Julia’s nod she added, “Good. Go finish up.”
“Are you scared?” Ella asked as she handed Julia a plate to dry. Neither of them could figure out how the dishwasher worked, and neither of them wanted to interrupt the women in the living room who were plotting God knew what.
“Utterly terrified,” Julia admitted as she dried the plate and put it in the cupboard. “I’ve fought this for so long it’s a little bit scary to think of what they might be discussing right now.”
Ella smiled. “You fought what for so long?”
“Admitting that I may like the BDSM stuff. When I first arrived here, I wanted nothing to do with it. I hated how it seemed like everything that came out of Alexandra’s mouth was a reference to the lifestyle, but now… I don’t know. I can’t deny anymore that I do like it. But it still terrifies me.”
Ella nodded. “I was like that when my boyfriend suggested it.” At Julia’s quizzical look, Ella smiled. “I should say my ex-boyfriend. I’m bisexual, not polyamorous. He was the one who introduced me to the kink aspect within a relationship. Us both being new to it, we both made mistakes. I see that now that I’m with Nicky. Having Alexandra’s expertise makes me excited about our future, though. I think exploring this together really helps.”
“Were you ever ashamed of it?”
“I think I was in the beginning. We’re not supposed to be like this, but then again, why shouldn’t we be? It’s not like we’re doing anything wrong. Everyone has a thing that they enjoy that others frown upon. For us, it’s BDSM. For someone else, it’s chewing gum all day.”
Julia put the last plate away and closed the cupboard door. She gave Ella a grin. “That’s a weird comparison, but I get what you mean. I just don’t think I’m ready to show this to the outside world.”
“You don’t have to,” Ella said as she gently touched Julia’s arm. “You don’t owe anyone an explanation. If you want to keep this between you and Alexandra, then it’s your right to do so. I would never ‘out’ you to anyone. That’s not how this world works, and I know Nicky would never do it either.”
“Thank you. I guess I just wonder how it all works once I leave. I mean, Alexandra does this for a living.” Julia fell quiet as her smile faltered. Alexandra did do this for a living. Would she keep doing this once Julia left? Would Julia ever see Alexandra again?
Ella smiled sadly when she saw Julia’s face. “I think you and I have the same fears. All I can tell you is that communicating is extremely important. Talk about your fears with Alexandra, and everything will be okay. Trouble comes when you stop communicating. That is when misunderstandings happen, and those are a whole lot more difficult to deal with than any conversation that you may be too scared to bring up.”
“Right, that makes sense. I guess I shouldn’t overthink it too much. I know we have all the time in the world before I eventually have to go back. I guess…I’m just not ready to leave yet. I feel like we’re an hour into this journey, and the thought of having to leave physically hurts me.”
Ella’s smile was full of empathy. “From what little I see, I don’t think Alexandra wants you to leave either. Just take it one day at a time and keep talking to her. You two will find a solution to any problem you may encounter. I’m sure of it.”
Julia leaned in closer and blushed as she whispered. “So, does Nicky let you touch her?”
“Pretty much since the first time we met,” Ella said with a little la
ugh. “But Nicolette and Alexandra are two completely different people. I mean, that goes for people in general, doesn’t it? We all come with different instructions. What seems right in one relationship doesn’t have to be right for your own relationship. Nicky and I are still learning so much about BDSM and Shibari, and our first encounter wasn’t very BDSM-like. I think we’re in a different situation than you and Alexandra are. Alexandra seems like a person who has been in control over every aspect of her life, and to let someone in like that may take some time.”
“We actually did talk about that briefly. It’s just incredibly hard sometimes to not reach out and touch her, because I really want to.”
“I imagine that’s probably why she won’t let you yet. She enjoys teasing you, so I know she’s incredibly attracted to you. I imagine that once you do get to touch her, you’re in for quite the ride.”
Julia grinned. “I hope so. I know she said she needs time, and I will give it to her, I just really hope she knows that I really want to touch her.” She blushed at her own statement and lightly shook her head. “I can’t believe I’m telling you all this. Alexandra would probably kill me.”
“I think Alexandra would be very proud of you for opening yourself up and talking about your fears and desires. I know how hard that can be, and I know we’re practically strangers, so opening up to me is a good thing. If you would like, we can keep in touch once Nicky and I leave. Sometimes it’s good to have someone to talk to about your fears, especially if that someone knows what you are going through.”
“I would like that.”
Ella returned the smile and rolled her eyes when Nicky called them over. “That’s her ‘I’m luring you into a trap’ voice,” she told Julia.
“Wonderful.” A little nervous as they made their way to the living room, Julia sat down next to Alexandra on the couch and tugged her feet beneath her legs. “So, what have you guys cooked up for us?”
“Nicky is going to explain it to Ella in another room.”
Julia gulped. Nicky took Ella’s hand, and they walked away.
Alexandra smiled as she patted her lap. “Come here.”
With her head on Alexandra’s lap, Julia sighed contently as her fingers starting playing with Julia’s hair.