by V. F. Mason
Opening the door quietly, I approached the bed and smiled, noticing Jake lying on his side, covered with a blanket, while Vi hugged him from the back like a mama bear, their chests moving rhythmically.
Removing my shoes, I lay down behind Vi, hugging my family close as my head hit the pillow and I exhaled freely, having them close.
“What took you so long?” she murmured, adjusting better in the crook of my arm. With a soft kiss to the back of her neck, I let sleep take me, because for now, everything was right in the world.
We would have another battle once we were in Russia.
Vivian
Entering the gates of the Bratva headquarters seemed almost like déjà vu, as nothing had changed. Some new models of cars, and slightly better taken care of grass, but that was about it. Dominic probably didn't bother much with the interior design.
Jake still slept on Radmir’s lap, although he woke up for a few hours to play some video game, but just before landing, his ears started to hurt, and although I massaged them, it didn't help, and he willed himself to sleep.
“Krasivoglazaya moya, I need to ask something of you.” His tone was serious, almost grim, and my stomach flipped.
“What?” He took my hand into his and raised it to his mouth, kissing lightly.
“We need to play a scene in front of the Bratva now.”
My brows furrowed in confusion. “I don’t understand.”
“Someone is after you, the director, the man who organized all this. I thought it was your father.”
“But it’s not?” I needed to know he had nothing to do with it, because that way someday maybe they’d be able to find common ground.
He nodded. “Yeah, but it means the director is out there ready to strike. That’s why I brought you here. We have leverage.” He shifted Jake on his shoulder as the car stopped. “Act furious with me as if I kidnapped your child. Like we are not together. If he is among my men, he will rise to protect you. He’ll use it as an opportunity to shine and get your gratitude.”
“You think he might be one of the Bratva?”
“I don’t want to think about it… but I can’t exclude it either. Follow my lead. I won’t tell you more, because your reactions should be genuine.” He got out of the car and burst inside the headquarters while I ran after them, and almost stopped, shocked at all the people watching us in surprise.
Kostya still worked as the bartender, giving food and drinks to the rest of the people who sat around the table. Dominic had his hand wrapped around some dark-haired beauty, and I assumed it was his Rose, and the blue-haired sniper girl, Konstanciya, who I’d met once while she was visiting the house.
Vitya and Michael were there too; Radmir showed me their picture so I would be familiar with members.
“How could you do this?” I shouted in a hushed tone, as he didn't give me any pointers. He ignored my words and placed sleeping Jake on the couch.
He faced Dominic and snarled, “Pakhan.” There was nothing but reserved politeness in the growl. He removed his jacket and covered Jake with it, and I was grateful for that, because the air conditioning running at a low temperature made me feel seriously cold.
“Radmir,” I hissed, bringing his attention to me so we could end this charade quickly and properly interact with everyone. I hardly wanted to make a bad impression on all the new people as that hysterical American.
“We have nothing to talk about.”
“You kidnapped my son!”
His face turned lethal, scaring me a bit. I was never on the receiving end of his fury. Even during our lovemaking after separation, his eyes stayed kind. “Our son. And if you thought just for one second I would allow him to stay with you and your husband, you are even dumber than I thought.”
A shot of pain rushed through me and probably reflected in my eyes, because I didn't know how else to react to this verbal attack. But I composed myself, showing nothing but indifference. “No law would give him to you.”
“You are in Russia. Only my law applies here. And if you think of bringing that fucker here demanding his rights just because his name is on the birth certificate—” His jaw ticked, maybe because we never discussed it before. I just assumed he had read all our files and didn't need me to spell it to him that his name was on Jake’s birth certificate. For a second, hurt flashed in his eyes, as if just the thought alone pained him.
Shaking my head, I patted Jake on the back as he stirred from all this shouting, and then replied, “His name is not on it.”
Radmir paused at this information, and then muttered, “Fuck it,” and grabbed me by the neck—as someone gasped—while holding my face close to his. “You want our kid back?” I nodded, and he gave me a sinister smile. “Then you’ll learn to obey.” He addressed Kostya. “Watch my kid.” He scooped me up in his arms, and since I was the helpless victim here, I screamed my lungs out.
“Let me go, you freaking barbarian!” But he just moved in the direction of his wing, barely stifling a laugh at my outburst.
When we finally reached his room, he took us inside and pressed me against the door, kissing me deeply. “You were amazing.”
“Had to play blind.”
He chuckled, and I pushed him aside to swipe my gaze around his wing and noted nothing changed.
Did life stop at the freaking headquarters?
“No design change?”
“Krasivoglazaya, seriously? When would I have time for it?”
Grabbing a bottle of water on the table, I drank it rapidly, but then I didn't miss how there was not even a speck of dust.
“Who cleans your room?” Even I could hear loud and clear the jealousy in my voice, and his brows rose in amusement.
“You’re cute when you’re jealous.”
Not in the mood for his jokes, I folded my arms and tapped my foot. “It’s not an answer to my question.”
“It's not?” Suddenly, all the humor vanished from his eyes as he traced my chin, raising it. “I haven't touched another woman since the first time my eyes landed on you. I thought I made that clear.” Butterflies erupted inside me as happiness slipped into my bones at the idea he had stayed faithful through all this time. Even though he said as much during sex, I didn't know if I should believe him. Just the idea of someone else touching him killed me, and even though it was unrealistic to expect fidelity from him during the last five months’ separation, I did.
A hard knock on the door burst the bubble around us, as Kostya yelled, “Your kid woke up and is asking for his parents.”
“Oh no, he is probably scared.” Without thinking about the whole plan thing, I rushed outside and hugged Kostya. “Hey, man, long time no see.”
He stood there stunned and then muttered, “Hey, Vi.” Then he asked Radmir, “What’s going on?” I dashed back downstairs and found Jake with trembling lips and hugged him close. “Shh, honey. Mama’s here.”
“I woke up alone.”
Wiping the tears away, I kissed his forehead. “I’m sorry, honey. We thought you would sleep longer.” No more of those plans if they stressed my child like that. I should have thought about it before.
“Vivian, can we have a minute?” Radmir joined us and ruffled Jake’s hair. “One second, little buddy.” Then he grabbed my elbow, moving me to the far corner, and hissed, “I told you to stay put.”
“Jake was crying. I won’t just blindly follow some plan when my child is alone.”
“He wasn't alone, damn it!” He tugged his hair. “He is a boy, not a girl. He can handle it. You are babying him too much.”
Too shocked to even say anything, I opened and closed my mouth a few times before taking a deep breath.
But fuck it.
“Are you out of your freaking mind?” Some members stopped what they were doing as I shouted at him.
“We need to find him, Vi. Or he will hurt Jake.”
“Why would he hurt him?”
“Because he binds us together forever.” Now this psycho was after
my son? “Rosa is going ice-skating at the Kremlin. Let him go with them. It’ll give me enough time to see everyone's reaction.”
“Absolutely not! She is a stranger. And besides that, it’s a new country for him, and you want to send my baby God knows where?”
“Please trust me, Vi,” he asked and then took the decision from me as he addressed Rosa, who had Jake plastered against her leg, and asked if he could go with her. “Could you please do it? I don’t want him to hear all this.”
Rose glared at him, but without another word, she urged Jake outside as the car waited for them while he waved at me.
As they left, worry didn't leave my gut as I rubbed my hand above my heart. I hoped Radmir was not mistaken and nothing would happen to my baby.
I wasn't sure I would forgive him if Jake became collateral damage in this.
“Better be right, Radmir.” I hit him in the chest and sat on the couch, hoping this worry would fade away into nothing.
But life had a funny way of proving me wrong.
Radmir, 10 years old, October
The blazing fire spread around me as the flames ignited everything they touched. Curtains, carpet, and my bed. My scream tore from my mouth right at the moment my dad entered the room. The door banged against the wall as it opened wide. “Radmir, son!” he shouted and then ordered, “Jump into my arms.” Too shocked to even think, I rose on my bed and, grabbing my favorite stuffed animal, I did as he commanded. He caught me just before the fire touched my pajamas.
He hugged me close, pressing my face into his neck. “Shh, don’t be afraid, honey. Just don’t look anywhere, and Daddy will get you out of here.” I felt his chest move and heard the sounds of various objects crashing while my lungs filled with smoke. I tried to breathe in the smell of my daddy as much as possible.
“Ludmila!” he shouted for Mommy. “Ludmila, where are you?” She hadn't replied and fear ran through me, knotting my stomach while I desperately wanted to hear my mother’s voice.
“In here,” she answered weakly. I covered my nose with my hand as Dad moved in the direction of the kitchen, where my mom lay on the floor under the massive kitchen counter, which had fallen on her and trapped her in place. She wiggled and tried to push it away, but it wouldn’t budge. So far, the smoke wasn't as strong here, maybe due to the window being open, which allowed a bit of fresh air.
Dad put me down on the tiles, and then tore the end of his shirt and covered my mouth with it. “Keep it like that, son. Let me save Mommy.” He kneeled in front of her, sliding his palm under the heavy wood, and tried with all his strength to lift it, but all it did was rise a bit. “Ludmila, try to slide from under it.” He again repeated his action, but she couldn't do anything. “Ludmila!” he snapped, but she shook her face as a single tear ran down her cheek as my dad gazed at her confusedly.
“I can’t, Jake,” she whispered. “I don’t feel my legs.” Soon the fire reached the kitchen, torching the wooden baskets scattered around the floor, the curtains, and wooden chairs. We had no time; we needed to escape.
“Daddy, Mommy?” I came closer to them while they gazed at each other with weird looks on their faces I couldn't name. He leaned down and they rested their foreheads against each other, as if coming to some kind of decision.
“Radmir.” I quickly joined them. She gave me a kiss on the head and said hurriedly, “Go, run to the window. Daddy will help you.” Then she let me go as Dad picked me up, holding me so tightly for a second and whispering in my ear, “We love you, buddy.” He helped me get through the window. I held on to the windowsill then dropped the short distance to the ground.
“Go to the street,” Dad shouted, and I frowned but listened to him. Wouldn't he want me to open the door for them so they could escape? Or ask for help? With all my might, as fast as my legs would take me, I dashed toward the sidewalk where everyone already stood. As sirens rang loudly at the far end of the street, Daddy’s friends brought water and tried pouring it on. The main door was completely blocked.
Should I help them?
But Daddy’s voice rang in my ears. “Go to the street!” A few seconds after I reached the street, the house crashed and exploded. As an agonized scream left me, a man pushed me down on the ground, blocking me from the explosion. My head got dizzy, and in a second, everything went blank.
Radmir, 11 years old, November
“Child, come with me,” Vasya Konstantinov said gently as he squeezed my shoulder and we entered the gates of some weird place he called home. “The Bratva headquarters,” he announced as the view of the mansion and its surroundings came into view, immediately creating uneasiness inside me. Nothing about it reminded me of our beautiful house in the suburbs, where Mama grew roses that bloomed every spring.
Burrowing my face deeper into the scarf around my neck to protect myself from the cold, I asked, “Will I live here?”
Vasya nodded, and then unexpectedly crouched next to me, raising my chin so he’d have my whole attention. “You are a Bratva member now,” he said, and I frowned.
“What is that?” He chuckled, ruffling my hair. “You’ll learn.” Then he grabbed both of my shoulders. “My nephew will be one of the greatest members.”
Back then, I didn't understand his words. I didn't understand the Bratva wasn’t just a family. It was a brotherhood that dictated your life, and in a way, Vasya chose my destiny for me.
Radmir, 15 years old
Stepping to the side, I avoided Vasya’s fist aimed right at my face and dug down to deliver my blow to his stomach. He grunted painfully, which allowed me to move to his back and hit it with my elbow. He doubled over, but before I could catch his neck in a tight grip, he kicked me below the knees and I lost my balance, crashing onto the leather mat painfully, hitting my lower back.
He loomed above me, wiping the sweat away from his face. “Never underestimate your enemy and act victorious. The first mistake you can do is think no one out there is better than you are.”
“I didn’t—”
He shut me up pretty quick. “Silence! I’m not chitchatting here with you. Follow my words religiously. And enough of this virginity bullshit. Alicia will help you with that problem tonight.” He then helped me get up, ignoring my wince of pain from the black eye he’d given me and the limp, because his kick had a bit more force to it than what I was used to. “From now on, you will train with me. Everyone else seems to be babying you here.” Then he hopped down from the ring, while everyone else pretended not to hear a thing, although I didn't miss the pity in their eyes.
Vasya had turned my life into hell in this fucking place, demanding more than usual. I had to have the best grades, learn three languages instead of two, drive a car, shoot like no one’s business, and be the best fighter.
Even sex had to be under his strict supervision, since the Bratva members ran their mouths about my hesitation, and it wouldn't do for the pakhan's nephew. We needed to show our virility.
In the corners of my mind, my heart, there still lived a hope to have a love like my parents. They used to come alive in each other’s company, and I longed for it.
I almost laughed self-mockingly, because it was such a sappy thing to do.
The future sovietnik should be devoid of any emotions and be impersonal, right? It was time I accepted dreams had no place in this world.
Who cared who’d be my first?
Might as well be Alicia; she wouldn't matter.
No one would matter.
Radmir, 17 years old
His nose bleeding, the man sank to his knees on the concrete floor of the warehouse as he pleaded, “Please, mercy.”
Vasya just chuckled, lighting up his cigar while studying his fingernails. “You stole from the Bratva, Pasha. Surely you understood the repercussions?”
I grabbed the nearby towel, wiping my hands on it, as the fist fighting and “teaching a lesson” had ended, as Vasya called it. Although I was still considered young and a recruit in the brotherhood, he had started taki
ng me to such meetings so my fists could deliver the much-needed blows to make the victims or traitors talk.
“I won’t kill you though,” Vasya mused, and the man exhaled in relief, running his fingers through his hair and my brows rose. Since when had the pakhan showed mercy to anyone? If there was one thing Vasya hated more than coffee, it was disloyalty. You could steal a fucking candy from him, and he’d hang your ass. Those were the sacred rules.
“Thank you, pakhan… I promise I’ll give back the money to our kaznachei in no time—”
Vasya raised his hand and the man shut up. “Radmir here will do it for me.” The warehouse grew quiet as the members looked at Vasya with their eyes wide and displeasure written all over their faces, but none of them said anything.
How could he ask this of me? Fear ran through every bone as acid filled my mouth, and I had a deep need to gag, but I couldn't do it here.
“He is too young, Vasya. Not yet nineteen,” Vladimir said, coming closer to us, as he was Vasya’s head enforcer and best friend. “The kid is not ready.” We shared a look, but I turned away to focus my attention on the wall behind him so he wouldn't read me.
No one needed to know how much I hated the fucking brotherhood, where life had placed me and essentially took away every chance of being happy.
“He is ready,” Vasya replied coldly, and extended his hand with a Beretta 92 toward me. “Kill him, boy.”
It would have happened eventually. Might as well be now.
Taking the gun from him, I removed the safety and pointed it right between Pasha’s brows. His scared, brown eyes would forever haunt me, because a person never forgot the first person he or she killed.
Before I fired, an image of my parents appeared in my mind, where they would travel around the world and help people as part of a charity organization. What would have happened to my mother if she knew that her brother, the one she ran away from, raised her son to be a killer?