The Adventures of Hermes, God of Thieves

by Murielle Szac

  The fine fragrance of cabbage and lard was spreading across the air. Hermes’ mouth was watering. He quite liked the ambrosia accompanied by nectar which was served at the table of the gods, but there was hardly any variety in the menu. And so Zeus and Hermes devoured the modest meal with a hearty appetite. The two little old people watched them eat with great delight, not noticing that although Philemon had never stopped filling their guests’ glasses, his amphora of wine still remained full!

  In the end, the old people discovered what was happening and they were greatly alarmed. But Zeus got up to reassure them:

  “You have nothing to fear, I am Zeus, the god of gods, and this is my son, Hermes. We thank you for your kindness. And you shall be rewarded for it.” As he spoke, the dismal hut transformed itself little by little into a magnificent palace. Philemon and Baucis were holding hands, wide-eyed. “All this belongs to you from now on,” Zeus announced to them. “Ask me for anything you want, your wish shall be granted.” And so Baucis said with a gentle voice:

  “Most honoured lord, we are old now and we have never been apart. Our dearest wish is to die together.”

  Zeus looked fondly at the two old people in love. He agreed to grant their wish without hesitation:

  “The rest of mankind shall know soon enough the fruits of my wrath on account of their selfishness. But you, may you be happy.”

  Later, in the course of his numerous travels, Hermes frequently stopped by to give his greetings to the old couple. One day, as he was passing by to see them, he did not find them in their house. Instead, a strange tree had grown on their threshold: the trunk of an oak and that of a linden tree had intertwined to form a single trunk, while their branches intermingled. Hermes smiled and understood that Zeus had kept his promise: Philemon and Baucis were to remain together in this way for all eternity.

  To be continued…

  EPISODE 44

  IN WHICH HERMES IS INVITED TO A VERY STRANGE DINNER

  Previously: Zeus has come to realize that men are not at all hospitable towards one another. He intends to punish them.

  Zeus’ anger against men was increasing day by day. One evening, Hermes confided in his sister Athena:

  “I feel quite concerned, sister,” the young god said to her as he joined her on one of the terraces of the palace, “men are gradually forgetting all the rules they need in order to live together. Our father will not tolerate this for much longer. I fear for those whom Prometheus took under his protection…”

  Upon hearing the name of her friend Prometheus, the goddess of Wisdom let out a faint sigh. Her gaze rested on the earth far down below. She replied:

  “It is precisely ever since Prometheus has no longer been there to guide them that men have become barbarians. Human beings are weak and defenceless. I too fear for their sake.”

  Hermes and Athena stopped talking all of a sudden—there were footsteps approaching. Zeus appeared dressed as a wayfarer and ready to depart.

  “My children, I have been looking for you. You are to come with me on a short trip around the earth. I wish to give those accursed men one last chance.”

  And so it was that they went, all three of them, on a journey to the kingdom of Arcadia. They were dressed as simple wayfarers; however, the trio did not pass unnoticed. Night was falling when they arrived at the court of King Lycaon. He was an exceedingly brutal king, full of arrogance. He was only interested in war. His fifty sons spread terror across the entire kingdom and he did nothing except encourage them further. For a very long time now there were daily murders, thefts, assaults and insults in the kingdom of Arcadia. As the three visitors passed, the inhabitants would break into a murmur. Some of them would begin even to pray, as though recognizing that these were divine beings. Lycaon was informed of the arrival of the three individuals and of his people’s attitude towards them—and he was extremely annoyed. Yet he came to greet his guests himself. Lycaon’s face was red and scowling, and Hermes instantly found him loathsome. Lycaon first led his guests to their room, so they could rest before participating in a banquet in the great hall of state. The corridors of the palace were covered with litter. This squalor did not seem to bother King Lycaon. “I leave you now,” he said to his visitors. “I have orders to give to the cooks.” And he went away.

  Hermes slipped discreetly behind him. And what he saw in the palace kitchens horrified him. Lycaon had just given orders for a servant to be killed and boiled in a great cauldron so he might be served to the guests! He was slapping his thighs and laughing hard, and he was telling his cook, who had turned ashen pale: “Either these three are real gods, in which case they will realize we are serving them human flesh, or they are simple wayfarers, and in that case, what does it matter if we are making them eat man flesh?” His horrendous laughter resonated throughout the kitchen. Some of his sons laughed with him.

  Soon, it was dinner time. Yet Hermes had not had time to warn his father of what was being prepared. Lycaon had noticed Hermes in one of the corridors and had not left his side until the banquet. They proceeded to the table in a silence which had suddenly become heavy. The abhorrent dish was placed in front of Zeus. A wry smile was sketched on the faces of the royal family of Arcadia. Zeus took the dish and threw it brusquely on the floor. He had recognized the horrid food being served to him for what it was. Trembling with fury, he looked at Lycaon and yelled at him: “You are nothing but a savage beast and you shall remain one for the rest of your life from now on!”

  The king tried to reply, yet a long howl came out of his mouth instead. He fell on his knees, his arms changed into forepaws, his head became elongated and his nose became a muzzle. And long, dirty grey hair covered his entire body. Lycaon made one more attempt to speak, and from his jaws now came a howling full of doom. Lycaon had been transformed into a savage wolf! His fifty sons became wolves in their turn. Furious, Zeus hurled his thunderbolt and set the palace ablaze. Then he hounded the pack of wolves right into the heart of the deepest forest of the kingdom.

  The three gods resumed their way back to Olympus, yet the more they advanced, the more Zeus’ anger increased.

  “Dogs!” he cried. “Savage beasts, this is what men have become! They no longer respect anything; they don’t even have any respect for us. Their punishment must be terrible!”

  Athena and Hermes did not know what to do. Hermes mustered all his courage and said:

  “Father, perhaps they are not all of them as bad… Allow them one last chance.” Zeus cut him short:

  “Enough! This was their last chance!” And this threat made Hermes tremble. What was to become of men?

  To be continued…

  EPISODE 45

  IN THE COURSE OF WHICH A GREAT FLOOD COVERS THE EARTH

  Previously: Zeus has allowed men one last chance. Yet he came upon the palace of Lycaon, a savage king who tried to make him eat human flesh! He is preparing a terrible revenge.

  A voice is calling in the night. It is the voice of Prometheus, chained upon his rock. He calls, groans, he knows that men, his children, are under threat. He has given them life; he cannot bear to see them disappear. For he has guessed that Zeus intends to eliminate them all from the face of the earth. And this is why the chained Titan cries out for the very first time.

  “Deucalion! Deucalion!” He is calling his favourite son. And his voice steals through the night, it reaches the ears of the sleeping Deucalion. “Deucalion, my son, wake up,” says the voice. “Build a great wooden crate, pile up in that crate as many provisions as possible, get your wife on board, and sit next to her yourself. Do as I tell you and you shall be saved. But above all, make haste!”

  Deucalion peered wide-eyed into the darkness.

  “Father? Is that you?”

  He had of course recognized Prometheus’ voice. Yet Prometheus no longer answered. There was nothing around him except the silence of the night. The words of Prometheus’ message were still ringing in Deucalion’s head. He got out of bed, woke up his wife Pyrrha and
immediately began to obey his father’s voice. He cut wood, sawed and hammered nails all night long, while Pyrrha prepared bags of food. At daybreak the crate was finished. Deucalion and Pyrrha climbed inside, then they waited.

  As soon as he was back on Mount Olympus, Zeus had summoned his brother Poseidon, the god of the Seas. Since that time they had been closeted together in the council hall of the gods. Hermes wandered around the palace passageways, trying to guess what was being prepared. At last, the two great gods came stern-faced out of the hall. They advanced towards the palace terrace and observed the earth in silence. Zeus then said to Poseidon:

  “Come, you go first!”

  And so the god of the Seas raised his arms and began to command the tides:

  “O sea, oceans and lakes, overflow and spread across the earth! And you rivers and streams, come out of your beds!”

  Hermes shuddered as he listened to his uncle’s cavernous voice. He craned his neck down towards the earth and he was left aghast by what he saw. A flowing tide was sprawling everywhere. The seaside villages, the hamlets which had been built along a river, all these had already been drowned under great masses of water. Driven mad with fear, human beings were trying to escape the tidal wave. They ran and ran till they were out of breath. Some climbed on trees, others tried to seek refuge on the mountain tops. Terror and dismay reigned on earth.

  At that instant, Zeus seized his thunderbolt and made it crack several times in the sky. He cried: “Now, black clouds, burst and empty yourselves upon the earth!” Immediately, a terrible thunderstorm broke out. The sky was streaked with violent flashes of lightning and torrential rain came crashing down on the earth—a continuous rain, which fell brutally and joined the tidal wave already engulfing everything. Before this raging sky, Zeus’ face remained immobile. The blinding flashes of lightning did not even make him blink. Hermes watched in turn this unleashing of violence in the sky and his father’s impassive face. He admired his father’s power. The punishment meted out to mankind was terrible, but their crime had been immense. They had forgotten the laws of the gods, they no longer knew how to welcome strangers. They had no respect for one another, they had become barbarians. Satisfied with the flood they had unleashed, Zeus and Poseidon separated. The rain continued to fall incessantly in this way for nine days and nine nights. By the end of the ninth day, when the water stopped trickling down the sky, it had engulfed the entire earth. There was nothing left except a vast area of water. Hermes looked down with sadness and observed this boundless sea, which by now covered the entire earth. His eyes searched desperately for some sign of the presence of a living creature. Everything seemed dead down below. The messenger of the gods could not believe that this was the end of mankind. He descended from Olympus and flew above the liquid mass, still hoping to find some sign of life. Yet nothing troubled the smooth surface of the water. “Have all men drowned, then?” Hermes asked himself, devastated.

  To be continued…

  EPISODE 46

  IN WHICH DEUCALION AND PYRRHA ARE RESCUED FROM THE WATERS

  Previously: To avenge himself against men, Zeus, aided by his brother Poseidon, has sent a vast deluge upon the earth. Everything has drowned under the waters. Hermes is afraid that the human race may have totally perished.

  Hermes had been flying for hours without being able to locate the slightest sign of life, when his gaze was suddenly drawn to an object floating on the water’s surface. This object was whirling round and was being tossed about by the currents. The messenger of the gods decided to go near it. When he was a few feet away from the object, Hermes realized that it was a crate. And inside that crate there was a man and a woman! Hermes immediately recognized Deucalion, the son of Prometheus, and Pyrrha, the daughter of Epimetheus and Pandora. The couple had not yet seen Hermes. They were curled up inside the crate, nestling in each other’s arms.

  Hermes was moved to see them like this. But what was to become of these two human beings floating adrift? He decided to go and persuade Zeus to save them.

  When he found Zeus, Hermes discovered with relief that the master of the gods had regained his usual good-natured mien. His anger was visibly gone, washed off by the deluge inflicted upon men.

  “Father,” said Hermes, drawing very close to Zeus, “men have now been punished enough for their barbarity. But do you remember Deucalion, the son of Prometheus, and his wife Pyrrha?”

  Rather startled, Zeus replied: “Yes, my son, I remember them, why?”

  “Well, were they guilty too? Did they deserve the same punishment?” asked the canny Hermes.

  Zeus sighed: “These two were innocent. They were honest people and just, they respected both men and the gods. It is a great pity that they were not spared, but what could I do?” And he let his hand fall back on his thigh dejectedly.

  “Father, you can still save them!” cried Hermes. And he knelt on one knee, the better to beseech Zeus.

  “How is that possible?” Zeus asked, astonished. “All men were drowned under my divine wrath.”

  “They are the only ones left on earth. I beseech you, father, save them. Let there be a new human race. I promise you that they shall be honourable and proud and that they shall not fall back either into wickedness or violence. I promise you that they shall honour the gods!”

  Zeus was observing Hermes with astonishment. He was a little vexed to see him put so much passion into his defence of the creatures of Prometheus, yet he loved his son. He loved to please him. And besides, his anger had subsided and he now wondered whether it was in fact quite fair that, through his own fault, the innocent should have died together with the guilty.

  Zeus rose from his seat and smiled. Then he said: “All right, then, Hermes, your words have managed to convince me. I grant you their survival.” The young god leapt to his feet and, unable to restrain himself, placed a sonorous kiss on his father’s cheek before darting out of the room.

  Far down below in the flowing vastness, the wooden crate was still drifting afloat. Suddenly, Deucalion caught sight of a hillock of earth, which protruded from the waters. “Look, Pyrrha,” he cried, “there is a mountain that the deluge did not enshroud with its waters. It looks like Mount Parnassus, the mountain where the nursemaids of the gods live! The gods must certainly have spared it in order to save the three nurses of their babies!” Aiding himself with a branch, Deucalion steered the crate towards Mount Parnassus. They made landfall and set foot at last on a stretch of firm ground. Deucalion gathered up a handful of earth and, turning towards the sky, he said: “Thank you Zeus, thank you.” At that moment the waters slowly began to recede. At Zeus’ request, Poseidon had just commanded the rivers and the streams to return to their beds, and ordered the seas to regain their shores. Yet the two human beings found themselves all alone in a deserted world. And Hermes wondered whether they would be able to cope, and what new trials might still be in store for them.

  To be continued…

  EPISODE 47

  WHEREUPON A NEW RACE OF MEN IS BORN, THE MEN OF STONE

  Previously: Hermes has managed to obtain Zeus’ consent to save Deucalion and Pyrrha, the sole survivors of the deluge. Yet they are not out of all danger yet.

  Trembling with happiness, Deucalion and Pyrrha looked at the receding waters. Hermes, who had descended from Olympus, was observing his little protégés with tenderness. The young couple held hands and walked slowly onwards, happy to see the devoured landscapes re-emerge. And so they descended from Mount Parnassus. Soon, they came near a temple. It was covered with seaweed and mosses after its long stay underwater. The building was almost falling to ruin. Deucalion and Pyrrha went inside the temple and decided to offer thanks one more time to the gods for having spared their lives.

  “It seems to me that the statues of the gods are looking at us benevolently,” whispered Pyrrha in Deucalion’s ear.

  “You are right,” murmured Deucalion, and walked to the centre of the temple. Then in a loud voice he beseeched the gods: “O gods, who ha
ve saved our lives, help us! We are alone in the world; we cannot survive in this solitude. Help us! Protect us!”

  Hidden behind a pillar, Hermes was waiting. He was hoping wholeheartedly that the other gods would be listening to this prayer as well. Yet he could never have imagined the odd response that the couple would receive.

  It was dark and damp in the temple Deucalion and Pyrrha had just entered. The young woman shivered from the cold. Yet she kept her face turned towards the statues of the gods from whom she hoped to receive help. Deucalion had managed to light a fire and he was looking round the temple. All of a sudden, a voice was heard coming from nowhere. The voice said:

  “Hide your faces, leave the temple and throw behind you your mother’s bones but do not turn around to look.”