Red Hats

by Damon Wayans

  The hard knock at the front door startled Alma. She immediately thought Jesse had returned. She grabbed a frying pan to give him something to remember her by.

  “I told you to stay away from me, didn’t I?” Alma said, lifting the pot over her head.

  She was shocked to see Joy on the other side of the door. Joy screamed for mercy.

  “I’m sorry, Alma!” Joy said, weakly lifting her arm to protect her skull. “I need help. Is Sister Dee here?”

  Alma lowered the pan to her side, noticing the infirm look in Joy’s eyes. “I thought you were someone else. What’s wrong with you?”

  “I don’t know,” Joy said, falling into Alma’s arms. “I feel very sick.”

  Alma helped Joy into the living room, setting her gently on the couch.

  “My God, you are burning up. How long have you been like this?”

  “Two days. I don’t know what is wrong with me.”

  “Well, we are going to find out,” Alma said, picking up the phone.

  “You don’t have to do this,” Joy said weakly.

  “Oh, hush up. Just because I don’t like you don’t mean I don’t have to take care of you. Now, lay back and let me call this hospital before you change my mind.”

  “You are something else,” Joy said just before she passed out on the couch.

  The ambulance came quickly. Alma was grateful that Dee lived in such a nice neighborhood.

  James was watching from his window as the medics hoisted Joy into the back of the emergency vehicle. Alma signaled to him not to come down with a slight shake of her head. She liked how they communicated in silence. She was instantly upset with herself for being so distant from him the past few days. Now, she missed him and wished that the Joy factor wasn’t present so he could ride along with them to the hospital.

  Alma called Dee, who promised to rally the troops and meet them at the hospital. By the time the paperwork was filled out, seven Red Hats were there with flowers, balloons, and loving support. Alma was impressed most by Stacy’s presence.

  “Hello, honey. You sure are pretty,” Stacy said to Alma, giving her a wink and a smile at their inside joke.

  “What are you doing here?” Alma asked Stacy.

  “I’m a lot like you, Alma. My bark is worse than my bite. I always try to do the right thing. At my age, I’ll never know when it may be me lying up in that hospital room. I don’t want to be alone. Besides, the good Lord says that when you return kindness for evil, it’s like heaping fiery coals upon that person’s head. Plus the fact that Dee told me that you were bringing Joy to the hospital, and I thought to myself it sure would be nice to see you again.”

  Alma gave her a hug. “Aww, that’s so sweet.”

  Five hours later, a doctor approached the noisy and crowded waiting room. It felt like a wedding reception with all of the Red Hats seated and standing around chatting. Several women showed up with food and fresh coffee, understanding that the dispenser in the hospital was sure to make even the strongest of stomachs sick.

  “Which one of you ladies is Alma?” the short bespectacled doctor asked.

  “I am.”

  “May I speak with you in private, please?”

  “We’re sisters. We have no secrets,” Magdalena snapped.

  “Sorry, I’m just following the request of the patient, Miss. No offense,” the doctor politely replied.

  He escorted Alma down the hallway and into an empty room.

  “What’s wrong with her, Doctor?”

  “Mrs. Pryor has contracted hepatitis C and a mild case of gonococcus.”

  “What’s gonococcus?”

  “It’s commonly known as gonorrhea. Which can be treated with cephalosporin or quinalone. However, the hepatitis’s severity is determined by her lifestyle. The disease attacks the liver, so modifying her diet and avoiding foods that tax the liver excessively are critical. She has to exercise regularly, abstain from alcohol, and avoid anal sex and multiple partners.”

  “Hold on, Doctor. This is way too much information for me to handle. I barely know this woman,” Alma said.

  “That’s strange . . . she said you were the only woman she trusted,” the doctor replied. “However, if you would like, I can give you a list of things that she must practice and avoid in order to have a productive life. This is a very serious disease if taken lightly. Have a nice day.” He walked away as if he were a mechanic talking about an old car engine.

  Alma felt sorry for Joy as she sat in the room with her. The tubes of liquids snaking their way into her veins made her look like a science project.

  “Alma?”

  “Yes, Joy, I’m here.”

  “Please don’t tell the girls about my condition,” Joy begged.

  “Your business is your business as far as I’m concerned. If you don’t tell them, they won’t hear it from me.”

  “Promise?”

  “I promise.”

  “I feel so bad,” Joy said as tears rolled down her face onto the pillow propping up her head.

  “They gave you antibiotics. You should be feeling better in a few days.”

  “No, I feel bad about how I’ve treated you. I guess I’m just jealous. I felt it the day we found you laying there in that gorgeous red dress with all those pretty flowers surrounding you. I swear you looked like something out of a fairy tale. So beautiful, and even though there was a cut on your head, you looked confident, like royalty. It was obvious that it was your choice to leave this world. Everybody wishes they were more like you. We talk about it all the time.”

  “Why would anyone want to be like me?” Alma asked.

  “Because we know you don’t need us. You don’t need anyone. You’re not afraid like the rest of us.”

  “That’s not true,” Alma confessed after a brief moment of reflection. “I’m just as afraid and insecure as the next woman. Maybe I don’t let it show as much, but trust me, God, I’m scared to death every day I wake up. But I ask myself, ‘Alma, is today the day you throw in the towel, or are you ready to fight to enjoy this day?’ That’s what you need to do, Joy. You have a hard fight ahead of you.”

  “I know.”

  “Don’t worry, I’ve got your back.”

  Knowing the security that came with that commitment, Joy smiled, then reached out, and Alma slowly took her hand. “Thank you,” Joy said.

  * * *

  Alma sat at the kitchen table, thinking about poor Joy and the recompense of her actions. Her life changed in a night of lust. Had it been true love, it still wouldn’t be worth the consequences. Depression, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, insomnia, itching, rashes, stomach upsets, headaches, fevers, and body ache were all symptoms of the disease. Joy was experiencing them all. Alma wished she didn’t have to keep this secret, especially since Joy needed so much care while she recovered. Her life would never be the same, although the doctor promised the infection would subside after seven days of the ten-day antibiotic cycle.

  Alma was physically exhausted from running back and forth to Joy’s place in Brooklyn to cook and make sure she took her medication. Alma felt Dee’s stare from across the dining table.

  “Alma, I know you don’t like people to get into your business, but I wouldn’t be a friend to you if I didn’t say that I can’t see for the life of me how you can give so much time and care to a woman you don’t like and yet turn away your own son, who obviously needs you right now,” Dee blurted out.

  The look on her face confirmed to Alma that this was something Dee had been keeping inside for the past week. Dee backed up in her wheelchair as Alma rose from her seat. It wasn’t until she dropped the knife and fork onto the table that Dee stopped seeing her life flash before her eyes. She braced herself for the blow she suspected would come as Alma walked toward her. It never came. The front door opened and then closed behind Alma.

  James was surprised to see Alma at his door so early in the morning. She wasn’t wearing makeup and had on a housecoat, so he dismissed the thought of an
early-morning booty call. The tears that welled up in her eyes said she needed a friend. James took her into his arms, then into his house. He made her a pot of Folgers. She’d turned him on to it and he hadn’t been able to drink anything else.

  “I want to help—I need to help my son, but I don’t know where to start.”

  “We’ll find him, and you tell him that. Tell him you love him and believe that he was put here to be extraordinary. Let Jesse feel your love and support, and he will have no choice but to get the help he needs.”

  “What if he doesn’t?”

  “What if he does?”

  Alma smiled, acknowledging the concept that positive thinking was going to be the key to success.

  The smell of urine and feces was enough to make a garbage man sick in what was the third crack house she and James searched through looking for Jesse. Shadows of crackheads, both young and old, moved in the darkness. Alma felt as if she was in a horror movie, and if James hadn’t been at her side, she knew for sure that there was no way she’d be there.

  “We have to check the back. The lady said he was inside this building,” James said.

  “Well, I don’t see him. All I see is a stack of clothes back here.”

  Suddenly, the clothing moved, and the gaunt face of Jesse turned to look up at her.

  “Momma. Is that you?” he cried.

  “Oh, dear God!” Alma exclaimed at the sight of his frail body.

  As James lifted Jesse from the floor, something fell from his pocket and made a muted thud on the concrete ground. Alma bent down and picked up a mouthpiece for a trumpet. She followed James as he carried her son to the waiting taxi. Alma stroked his head as he lay on her lap, moaning softly.

  “My poor baby. My poor, sweet baby.”

  chapter seventeen

  Alma was surprised when James asked the cab driver to stop in front of his building. She had already made up her mind that she would not beg Dee to let Jesse stay with them. Alma knew of a motel up in Harlem she could afford until she found a treatment center that fit her budget.

  “James, you really don’t have to do this.”

  “What if I really want to?” he replied while handing her the keys to open his apartment. “I don’t think you want to impose on Sister Dee any more than you probably feel you are. I have plenty of room, and it’s a great excuse to keep you close to me.”

  “His skin looks so dry. I think he’s dehydrated.”

  “I have a bottle of Gatorade in the fridge. Why don’t you pour him some, and I’ll make you something to calm your nerves.”

  The sherry that James gave Alma took effect in just three sips. Warmth came over her as James closed the guest-bedroom door quietly behind him.

  “He’s sleeping now, but we need to find him a detox center before he makes up his mind that it will be too hard. Crack wasn’t designed to let you quit by your own free will.”

  Alma got up enough courage to ask Dee humbly for her contact.

  “Her name is Dr. Nadiv Winters. She runs the June Retreat in upstate New York. She said there was a bed available for Jesse. Forgive me for making the call without your permission, but I figured since you didn’t hit me, you would be back to take me up on my offer,” Dee said as she handed Alma the notepaper with the address and phone number.

  “This place sounds expensive.”

  “It is, but Nadiv is a Red Hat and promised that you would be able to use your insurance.”

  “How am I going to be able to do that?”

  “Alma, don’t ask so many questions. Just take her up on the offer.”

  “I don’t know how to thank you, Dee.”

  “You don’t have to. It’s what our sisterhood is all about.”

  Alma leaned down and kissed Dee on the cheek, thanking her.

  James had rented a car to drive them upstate. Halfway there, Jesse woke up in the backseat, and he was angry.

  “Where are you taking me? Stop this car, man. I’ve got to get back out there.”

  “Out there where, Jesse?” Alma asked. “I’m taking you to get some help.”

  Jesse attempted to open the door and jump out.

  “I swear to God, if you jump out this car, boy, I will get behind that wheel and run you over myself. Now, for the last time, sit back and shut your mouth!” Alma yelled.

  Jesse saw the venom in her eyes and closed the door. He feared her more than he did falling out of a speeding car. When they reached the June Retreat, Jesse was sleeping again. Two orderlies wheeled him inside on a gurney after Alma filled out the paperwork. Nadiv Winters was a pretty, plump East Indian woman with long black hair pulled back into a perfect bun on top of her head. Her reading glasses hung by a beautiful eighteen-karat-gold necklace that caught Alma’s attention as they shook hands.

  “I am happy to meet you,” she said in a thick Indian accent. “Don’t worry about Jesse at all. He will be fine. In a few weeks, you won’t even recognize him. One thing you have to promise me, and I make everyone promise this, do not under any circumstance allow him to convince you that he is cured. It is an addict’s con game to get out before the treatment is finished.”

  “Trust me, I’m not a pushover,” Alma said cockily.

  “The other thing that I ask is to make yourself available for some group-therapy sessions with him in the near future.”

  “Why do I need therapy?” Alma asked.

  “A lot of times, the underlying causes for addiction stem from issues of resentment and anger fostered in childhood. We need to attack those issues in order to free him of his need to escape. That is the only cure to his addictions.”

  For the next few weeks, James was a great camp counselor for Alma. He could feel her inner turmoil as a concerned mother and was determined not to let her sink into the depression that beckoned her.

  Every time the phone rang, Alma’s heart dropped. Most times, it was Jesse begging for her to come get him.

  “I’m cured, Momma. I don’t need to be up here with all these white people. Most of them are alcoholics, anyway. They need the extra time to heal. I don’t want to do crack anymore. It’s out of my system. Please come get me.”

  “Dr. Winters told me that you must complete the entire six weeks. I promised her I wouldn’t help you escape until she said you were cured, Jesse.”

  “I hate it here. These people are weird. They keep talking about God and sponsors. They get off the drugs and alcohol and get addicted to God and sponsors!” he cried.

  “An addiction to God is a good thing, son. Turn your life over to him, and everything will work out fine.”

  “You turned your life over to him, and what did it get you, Momma? You’re still just as mean and angry as you were when Daddy was alive,” he shot back.

  “I have to go, Jesse. I will not let you take your anger out on me!”

  Alma’s hands shook as she hung up the phone. Where had that come from? How could he be so disrespectful of his own mother? I’ll bet Kenny never said such hurtful things to Stacy. I’m ashamed to be his mother, she thought.

  “Are you all right?” James asked from the seat next to her in the movie theater.

  “Yes.”

  “You need to turn the volume down on your thinking, Miss Alma. I can hear your thoughts over here,” James joked. “I’ll bet you don’t even know what this movie is about.”

  “I’m sorry, baby. My head is somewhere else.”

  “Do you want to take a walk?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’ve never been mad while walking,” James said as they crossed the street and headed for their spot by the water.

  “I love it down here.” Alma sighed. “The water is so peaceful. Even though it’s so dirty it looks like an oil spill, it still calms the soul.”

  “You calm my soul, Alma,” James confessed, holding her from behind. He softly hummed “Trust in Me” into her ear.

  Alma turned to face him. His eyes smiled with sincerity, and she could feel their hearts beating in perfect
rhythm as they leaned against each other on the railing.

  “Can I kiss you?” she asked.

  James nodded as he gently pulled her toward his waiting lips. Their tongues danced slowly and both of them kept their eyes open, gazing at the lust reflected in the mirrors to their souls. The kiss was so passionate that another younger couple walking by actually stopped in their tracks and took pictures, admiring what they didn’t believe was possible for older couples.

  “We’re causing a scene here,” James commented.

  “Good,” she replied. This was a pleasant distraction for her. “I can do this all day.”

  “Me too.”

  “May I kiss you again?” she asked.

  “Only if you promise to do it for an eternity.”

  “I can’t promise you that.”

  “Of course you can,” he said, dropping to one knee before her, with the young couple as witnesses.

  “James, what are you doing?”

  Looking down at him, she knew that this kind of perfect moment only happened in the movies. In fact, it had happened in the movie she just saw, but she hadn’t been paying attention the way she was right now.

  “Alma, I’ve only known you for several months, and yet I feel like I’ve known you a lifetime. Your kiss, touch, and smile are all I think about. I want to make love to you. I want to see you when I wake up and hold you when I go to sleep at night. I can’t stand to be away from you. I love you, and most important, I respect you. If you would say yes to be my wife, I swear I will treat you like a queen, and I will make you the happiest woman in the world. Will you marry me?” He held open a jewelry box, revealing the most beautiful, elegant antique diamond engagement ring Alma had ever seen.

  She looked over to the young woman, who had tears rolling down her cheeks. This was the proposal she had always dreamed about as a little girl.

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  “Say yes!” the young woman yelled as her camera flashed.