His Little Problem

by Melinda Barron

  She knew he was right, but she didn’t want to admit it. “Very well,” she said. “I’ll go out the back way and pretend to arrive at the front door.”

  “Balderdash,” he said. “They know you’re here, and frankly they don’t care. Trust me when I tell you they don’t give a flying fig whom I bed, or what we do in said bed.”

  “Of course not,” Alice said. “But that is why someone is blackmailing you, right? About your Club, as the letter stated.”

  “A discussion for a later time,” he said. He stood and Alice’s breath caught in her throat. In the firelight last night she’d thought his body to be absolutely perfect. In the full light of day she realized she’d been wrong. He was more than perfect, he was like the statue of David, muscular and oh, so sexual. Damn his friends for arriving now.

  “Go downstairs and have some tea,” he said. “I’ll be down momentarily.”

  “No, I won’t show up without you,” she said.

  He was washing with the basin of water on the stand. She watched as he dried off and then started to dress.

  “Don’t you have a valet for that type of thing?” she asked.

  “Are you offering to help?” He was securing his breeches.

  Alice looked away and shook her head. “Just hurry, please.”

  He put on a shirt but left it untucked. Then he indicated the door. “After you,” he said.

  She pushed past him quickly and he fell into step behind her, his silence making her very uneasy.

  They found Ellington and Essex in the library. There was a fully loaded tea tray on the table, and Alice wondered how often Buxton received unannounced visitors first thing in the morning.

  “Mrs. Hamilton,” Essex said as the two rose quickly. “A pleasure to meet you. May I offer my appreciation for your help in this delicate matter.”

  Alice nodded her assent. She took a seat and watched as a maid poured them each a cup of tea. When she was done, Buxton told her to have cook load the sideboard with breakfast items and to let him know when it was ready. The girl nodded and left.

  “I assume our tormentor has made contact again?” Buxton stared at his two friends and Ellington nodded, passing a sheet of foolscap to him.

  “This was delivered to my house this morning. It came in the same manner as the other notes were delivered.”

  Did you think I would just go away? I want my money. To prove my point I suggest you read the gossip sheets tomorrow morning. And the price has now doubled. Ignore me again and your secret will be on the front page of the newspapers.

  “May I?” Alice took the sheet from Buxton and examined it. Then she frowned. “I don’t believe this writing is that of a woman. The strokes are too firm, too deep on the paper. This note was written by a man.”

  “I agree,” Buxton said. “And I think we need to make the next move. We need to let Mrs. Howell know that we are on to her. Fancy a matinee today, my sweet?”

  Alice blushed at the endearment. She wondered what Essex and Ellington now knew about her relationship with Julian. Then she mentally slapped herself. Whatever “Club” was in danger of being exposed they were all part of it, therefore they probably already knew Buxton had taken her to his bed last night.

  “Don’t worry, Mrs. Hamilton, how you spend your evenings is none of our affair,” Essex said softly.

  Her face heated as if it were in the middle of a fire. She glared at Buxton, who shook his head slightly. He had kept his word. His friends may know they were intimate but they didn’t know she was a virgin.

  She sighed with relief and then gave them all a shy smile.

  Ellington broke the silence. “I think we should all go today. Show a united front. I’m sure Carin would enjoy the adventure.”

  “As will Charlotte,” Essex said as he rose. “She’s been itching to get out of the house since young Dalton was born. She’s been to one party and it only whetted her appetite for more.”

  “How is your son?” Alice noticed the interest in Buxton’s voice. She wondered if it was because he wanted a child.

  “Healthy and happy,” Essex replied with a grin. “And very good at waking up his parents in the middle of the night.”

  Ellington laughed. “It’s been years since I was a young father but I do remember it gets better. You’ll get some sleep soon.”

  The maid reappeared to say that breakfast was ready. The four of them rose, but Essex and Ellington begged off.

  “I’ll check with Charlotte and see where our actress is currently performing,” Essex said. “I’ll send word when and where.”

  When they were gone, Alice and Buxton went into the dining room. There was a wide variety of food and Alice didn’t wait for an invitation. She loaded her plate with eggs, sausages, toast and kippers. When she was seated, she watched as Buxton did the same thing.

  When he was seated they both began to eat. The silence between them was comfortable, and it surprised her. As she ate, though, something inside her told her she wanted to know more about hm.

  “Have you no children?” she asked. “I only pose the question because you seemed eager to hear about Essex’s new son.”

  Buxton shook his head. When his mouth was empty, he said, “My wife and unborn son died in childbirth. I never remarried. It never really occurred to me to take another wife.”

  She cleared her throat. “You realize if we go to the theater together people will talk.”

  “Is the idea so repulsive to you, to be seen with me?”

  “No, not at all,” Alice replied softly. “But surely you should escort a woman far above my station.”

  “Why should I not spend time with a respectable, young widow who could give me heirs?”

  The anger and resolve she’d felt upstairs were gone. “Damn you,” she said, and then she got up, crossed to his seat and kissed him. He laughed against her lips, pushing her back to look into her eyes.

  “A young widow who is very forward.” He pulled her across his lap and stroked her thigh through her skirts.

  “Julian? This Club of yours, what is it called?”

  Buxton grinned at her. “We are known as the Rakes of Mayfair.”

  “The title sounds like it fits you all,” Alice said. She tried to stand but he held her close.

  “You have no idea.” He kissed her gently. “If we are going to the theater then we need to get you a dress.”

  The pleasure she’d been feeling disappeared. “You see, that is just a tip of the problems we will have being seen together. In my world, I have a dress at home that I can change into and wear to the theater. You automatically assume I don’t have a proper dress to be seen with Lord Buxton and his high and mighty friends.”

  He looked as if she’d slapped him. “I’m thinking nothing of the sort. It’s just if you show up wearing the trousers you had on last night I think people would talk, but not about me attending the theater with you, Alice.”

  She pushed away from him and sat down in her chair. “Of course.”

  “Is this something we should talk about?” he asked.

  “Is it?” Alice took a sip from her tea and said, “I’m not of your sort. People know me around town because Joseph did a lot of work for people. He was not really a laborer, but he was an employee, so to speak. Which means I was thought of as nothing more than a worker’s wife. If people see me with you…”

  She let her words trail off and gave him a pointed stare.

  “Are you waiting for me to finish your thought?” he asked.

  “I think you know what I’m talking about,” she said. “Your reputation will be ruined.”

  “Who gives a fuck?”

  Her mouth fell open.

  “You said fuck several times last night if I recall.” He lounged back in his chair. “Surely hearing it in the dining room is not worse than hearing it in the bedroom?”

  “It just seems different,” she said. “In the bedroom it was naughty and, I have to admit, somewhat erotic. Here it’s just—well, jus
t wrong.”

  “As you wish,” he said. “I’ll only say that word when I’m planning on putting my cock in your body. In the meantime, we need to go to your house and find you a dress.”

  “If you’re trying to shock me it won’t work,” she said. “I help people solve problems and they sometimes are nasty. But on the other issue, yes, I need to go to my house and get a dress for the play.”

  “I’ll go with you,” he said. “I’d love to watch you change.”

  “Change my clothes, or change me in other ways?” she asked.

  “Isn’t that why you’re here, to be changed in other ways?” He made other ways sound like it was something devious.

  “I’m here to be, wait, I can’t say fuck.” She sighed heavily and looked around the room. “I’m here to have my romantic situation changed. How will that work?”

  He chuckled. “I’ll go with you to change. Give me a moment and I’ll call for my carriage. We can have a nice chat about the blackmail scheme.”

  When they were settled in the carriage, Alice kept her gaze trained on him. “What is your plan? Are you going to do nothing until the gossip sheets come out tomorrow, or are you going to Celia Howell and demand answers? You might get some if you catch her off guard.”

  “It’s a possibility,” he said. “I was thinking more along the lines of checking with someone who runs a gossip sheet.”

  “Trying to get the person to keep it from appearing?” she asked. She wondered what he was getting at. She wondered if he knew someone who worked with the sheets; she did, and she was fairly certain that he knew.

  “It’s best to get a heads up,” he said. “We need to change your clothing, but we also need to find someone who can deliver a message from us. The question is who should the message go to? I’m sure someone who solves problems would know were to go for information.”

  He cocked his head and stared at her, and Alice cleared her throat.

  “Perhaps.”

  “Perhaps my Aunt Fanny,” he said. “You know people who provide information to the scandal sheets. Where should we go to check? Do you have a favorite?”

  “Perhaps.”

  “Will that information cost additional payment?” he asked. “Is that why you’re being hesitant? Is there some particular act, besides fu—I mean intercourse—that you are interested in?”

  “You haven’t paid for the first incident.”

  He lifted his left leg so that his ankle rested on his right knee.

  “Are you complaining about the orgasm I gave you last night?”

  Why were her cheeks heating? He’d given her something she’d never thought to experience, and her body still tingled at the idea. It had felt wonderful, and truly, she wanted another. Would he give her one?

  “I would never complain about that,” she said. “And I don’t want additional payment. But I do worry about giving away the identity of my source. She might become upset at being, shall we say, exposed.”

  “You can vouch for me,” he said. “Should I offer her money?”

  Alice licked her lips. “This is going to cut into my time at my house, which is quite a ways from here. I don’t think we have time to run both errands.”

  “Ellington’s wife, Carin, has a ton of dresses.” He looked out the window and then back at her. “She used to be a dressmaker’s assistant. Ellington told me once he had to purchase extra wardrobes to store all her clothes, and they had to store all the hat boxes in the attic.”

  Alice laughed. “I would love to have that problem.”

  “She’s about your size,” he said. “I would say we meet your friend, and then we go see Carin. You’ll like her. She laughs a lot when she’s around her husband, which is all the time.”

  That was something else she would like, but she kept her mouth shut. She’d long given in to the fact that it would take her a while to find a husband; after her last experience she wondered if the man would make her smile or not.

  “Will she care if we just show up?” Alice asked.

  “Never,” Buxton said. “Now, where are we going?”

  “Trafalgar Square,” she said. “And there is no guarantee she’ll be there.”

  “Understood,” Buxton said. He tapped on the carriage and yelled out the change of direction. The carriage made a few turns and as they traveled along, Alice decided now was the time for a few answers.

  “Tell me about your Club.”

  “The Club?”

  Their gazes locked for a few moments. “You called it The Rakes of Mayfair. And when you said The Club, you made it sound like it was capitalized, almost like it’s a proper name as if it’s Alice, or Julian. I want to know more about it.”

  “Very well,” he said. “The Rakes of Mayfair include a group of people who enjoy, shall we say, sexual activities that most people would consider different.”

  He paused between the word consider and different. “Are you not going to be more specific?”

  “What would you like to hear?”

  His voice had turned low and seductive, and Alice felt her heart quicken. “The truth.”

  “It’s much more fun to play in bed than to do one’s duty,” he said. “So many people think love making should be nothing more than intercourse. Boring. Entertaining activities can strengthen the bond between a couple. A lot of people would think us the worse for all of it. I am not ashamed of our Club.”

  “Yet you keep it secret,” she said. “Is it like The Hell Fire club? Do you worship the Devil and make sacrifices?”

  “No, we have orgies and fuck like bunnies.”

  The carriage jolted to a stop and Alice was thrust forward. She barely caught herself before she went falling to the floor.

  “I think we’re here,” he said. “I also think we need to postpone the rest of this conversation until after the afternoon’s play.”

  “Play has such a different meaning when you’re talking about a matinee or your little Club.”

  “We’ll work on your definitions later,” he said. “Right now, we need to find your friend, get our information and get ourselves to Ellington’s so we can make it to the theater on time and rattle our actress.”

  “I like the sounds of that,” Alice said. He got out first and helped her to alight. They headed into the square, making their way toward the fountain. Alice stopped and looked around, and then turned to the right.

  “What are we looking for?” he asked.

  “Nothing,” she said. “My friend is here. She provides me with great information at times. I know her only as Fiona. Now, don’t turn this into an interrogation. Please let me talk to her.”

  “Is she an old wizened woman begging for alms?” he asked.

  “Hardly,” Alice answered.

  She started toward a flower stall and Buxton fell into step behind her. She hoped he would follow her instructions, keep quiet and not make Fiona angry. The woman had quite a temper, and if she felt she was being used she would close up like a clam protecting its pearl.

  Fiona was selling flowers to a man, and Alice stopped and watched the transaction. When it was over she waved a finger at Buxton and mouthed, “Let me talk.”

  He nodded and they approached the stall together.

  “Fiona.” Alice smiled at her, and the younger woman, who was barely thirty, smiled back.

  “Fancy this, you being here today,” Fiona said. She looked over Alice’s shoulder at Buxton. “And in such company as a Lord. My, my, you’re moving up in the world, but I’ve already heard about that.”

  “What?” Alice’s throat seized.

  “Oh, yes, a woman dressed as a man, sort of like you are now except you don’t have any of that facial hair stuck on your face like they do in the theater.”

  “May I ask what this person said?” Alice wanted to glare at him for talking, when she’d asked him to let her take charge of the situation.

  “Well, to be quite blunt, Lord Buxton, she told me that you were lowering yourself to have sex with
my friend here.” Fiona winked at Alice. “I listened, gave her three pounds for the information, which is much lower than what I usually give to people who provide me with gossip. She didn’t haggle with me, which was a large problem to me. It meant she was trying to get my friend, Alice in trouble, and I don’t like that idea.”

  “Thank you,” Alice said.

  “You can thank me, but I’m not the only person who provides information to the rags.” Fiona picked up a flower and handed it to Alice. “Buy a flower for your lady, Lord Buxton?”

  A chill ran up Alice’s spine. Something told her someone was watching them. She wondered if the person had followed them from Buxton’s house, or if they’d been waiting to see if they would come and visit Fiona.

  Buxton stepped forward and took the flower. He took a few coins from his pocket and handed them to Fiona. He didn’t hand the flower to Alice, who was, of course, still dressed as a man.

  “Are you in danger?” he asked.

  “I’m always in a bit of rough,” she said. “I give people information that some people don’t want to be heard. That means some people, if they knew where it came from, would come after me. I live with that everyday, and I assure you I am careful about what I pass on. Some people are not as careful. I’m sure our made-up man gave the information to others. I can’t vouch for what they would do with it, so you should be careful, Alice.”

  “This person who contacted you is trying to extort money from myself and a few friends,” Buxton said.

  “Yes, I’ve heard about your gatherings,” Fiona said. Alice couldn’t help but see that her friend was smiling. “Really, I don’t care who lies with whom. But others do. I have a feeling your so-called friend found someone to take their information and feed it to the rags, and there is nothing I can do about it.”

  “But you did help us,” Alice said. “I can’t tell you how much we appreciate it.”

  “Just invite me to the wedding,” Fiona said with a laugh. “I have a new dress that I would love to be able to wear someplace fancy.”