Through the Window 2

by Mary Jane Ballew

  Elizabeth sighed again, “I suppose it really is not such a surprise, given how very wild her behavior has always been,” she told her.

  Relief washed over Kitty's face, “Then you are not angry with me for keeping my suspicions from you?” she asked her.

  “No,” Elizabeth told her, “It would do neither of us any good to be angry with you now.”

  Kitty lowered her eyes, “I have been hoping against hope that she was only so big because she was eating all the time. My worst fear came to be when she had little Ben. I just know there are those in the neighborhood who will talk endlessly about her behavior.”

  Elizabeth knew she was right, but did her best to calm her sister’s worries, “It is possible the worst of the gossip will have subsided by the time you return to Longbourn in the new year,” she suggested.

  “I thank you for saying so, Lizzy, but I think we both know that with Lydia remaining at Longbourn, that probably will not be the case,” Kitty admitted reluctantly.

  Elizabeth smiled, “Well then, we shall just have to find you a suitable match before you are to return to Longbourn,” she encouraged her.

  Kitty sighed, “I do hope that will be the case,” she told her as they made their way back up towards the house.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  It was late by the time Darcy and Elizabeth returned to Windham House. It had been a long day, and Elizabeth was feeling tired. “I think I will go up and check on Georgiana,” she told him.

  Darcy grabbed hold of her hand as she began to walk away. “Elizabeth, I wonder if you have spoken with Georgiana about some of my concerns over her recent behavior?” he asked as she turned back to face him.

  “Yes, I have talked with her,” she told him.

  “And she seemed fine, nothing was upsetting her?” he asked.

  “I do not believe so,” she told him.

  Darcy pulled her into his arms, “I must admit, I have been worried about her of late,” he told her. “I just want to ensure my sister is all right. I know she is not a child any longer, but she is still very fragile and not at all wise to the ways of the world. I was thinking she might be feeling upset over Lydia’s giving birth to Wickham’s child so soon. I thought perhaps she might have said something to you?”

  “William, Georgiana is not so frail as you think she is. I have discussed everything with her concerning the circumstances surrounding the birth of little Ben, and she was not distressed by the news. She was understandably upset for my sister Lydia being abandoned by Wickham, but otherwise, she was perfectly fine.”

  “Are you very sure?” he asked her. “I find it strange that she has been so moody and withdrawn. Her leaving as she did today is not at all like her. Her behavior seems to me to suggest something more is bothering her. There is not more going on than you are telling me, is there?”

  Elizabeth hesitated for a moment. She still had not told him of Georgiana’s regard for Colonel Fitzwilliam and was not sure that she should. “William, I promise you, she is well,” she told him as she leaned up and kissed him softly on the cheek. “Now, if you do not mind, I will go and check on her,” she told him.

  Darcy pulled her back into his arms and held her tight, “Thank you, darling,” he whispered softly. “Thank you for being patient with me as I work my way through this business of my sister growing into a young woman.”

  Elizabeth kissed him again, “You are very welcome, my darling,” she told him as he released her.

  Darcy stood there for a moment and watched her as she walked away. He thought about his sister and sighed. He really did hope she was all right as Elizabeth had said.

  Georgiana sat at her window looking out over the gardens below. The skies grew darker as the clouds moved in and it began to storm. Georgiana’s eyes filled with fresh tears as the wind picked up and began blowing the leaves across the way. She shivered just a little from the cold as she pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders. Her heart ached as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Knowing that the man she loved was in love with another was truly the worst pain she had ever felt. She thought about the disappointment she felt over Wickham’s betrayal. It was nothing compared to the real heartbreak she now felt; Georgiana could think of nothing that would console her. She was just about to go to bed and cry herself to sleep when she heard Elizabeth at her door. “Just a moment, Lizzy...” she called out as she blew her nose and wiped the tears from her eyes. “Come in.”

  Elizabeth opened the door and stepped inside. She could see at once that her sister-in-law had been crying. “Georgiana, what is it?” she asked her as she rushed over to her side.

  Georgiana did her best to compose herself, but it was of little use, “Oh Lizzy,” she cried. “I do love him,” she said between sobs. “I realized after the last time we talked that I love him very much.”

  Elizabeth wrapped her arm around her shoulder, “Georgie, please do not cry,” she said, trying to calm her. “Tell me, what happened that has upset you so?”

  “Today,” she said as her voice broke a little. “Today at Mr. and Mrs. Godwin’s house, Richard came and asked to speak with Kitty alone. I am sure he is in love with her and has asked her to marry him.”

  Elizabeth shook her head, “No, dearest,” she told her. “I have talked with Kitty, and she made no mention at all of Colonel Fitzwilliam having made her an offer of marriage. Nor did she say he professed his love for her,” she assured her.

  Georgiana sniffled in and dried her eyes, “But I saw the two of them together, and Miss Lucas was so very sure that Richard is in love with Kitty,” she told her.

  Elizabeth smiled, “Oh Georgie, you have allowed your imagination to run wild,” she told her as she helped brush her hair from her face. “Colonel Fitzwilliam may have talked with Kitty, but I am sure there is no understanding between them.”

  Georgiana sniffled in again, “How can you be sure?” she asked her softly.

  “Well, let us examine the facts; first of all, I truly do not believe Colonel Fitzwilliam would choose Mrs. Godwin’s drawing room to make known his regard for my sister. With so many people about, it would hardly be very romantic or private,” she told her.

  Georgiana wiped her eyes. “I had not thought of that,” she admitted.

  Elizabeth laughed just a little, “Besides, if Colonel Fitzwilliam had made known his feelings for my sister, she would have told me. I have spoken with Kitty already on three separate occasions since you left the Godwin’s, and she made no mention of an understanding between herself and your cousin.”

  Georgiana sniffled in again as she considered what Elizabeth said. “Lizzy, now I feel very silly,” she told her. “I did allow my imagination to run wild. It was just so odd that he would come and wish to speak with Kitty as he did,” she told her.

  Elizabeth furrowed her brow, “Perhaps he only wanted to inquire something of her. The three of you are to attend the concert tomorrow evening with William and I. Perhaps he wanted to speak with her about that?” she suggested.

  “I suppose that is one explanation,” she said, somewhat doubtful. “Lizzy, I do not mean to allow my thoughts to run wild again,” she began to say. “However, you must tell me the truth; is it equally possible that my cousin did speak with Kitty and tell her of his regard, but insisted they keep their engagement hidden because of my Aunt Abigail?”

  Elizabeth shook her head and laughed. “Oh Georgie, my dear girl, I promise you it is not possible,” she assured her. “Truly, you must take control of your thoughts!”

  Georgiana fidgeted with the handkerchief in her hand. She looked up at Elizabeth, “But how can you be so sure?” she asked her.

  “Because, Kitty would tell me if it were so,” Elizabeth assured her. “With all that has happened with my sister Lydia, Kitty would never agree to keep such a secret. Besides, you know your cousin well enough to know he would never do something so devious. He is an honorable man, do not forget that. No, Colonel Fitzwilliam would never propose marriage to someone
in a crowded room full of people right under his mother’s nose and then attempt to keep it all a secret,” she said as she got up and walked over to sit on the bed. “Truly, if you think about it, you will see you have imagined things that are not there.”

  Georgiana grew very quiet for a moment and considered what Elizabeth said. She took in a deep, cleansing breath and shook her head. “Oh Lizzy, I have been very foolish,” she admitted. “Now as I talk with you, I see how silly I have been to think these things. Before, when I was speaking with Miss Lucas, it all seemed so possible, but now…”

  Elizabeth laughed again, “Oh goodness, Georgie, do not ever let Miss Lucas be your guide in such matters. She is a very dramatic young lady who is always thinking all kinds of silly things. She is a very lovely girl, truly, but do not let what she has said upset you so.”

  Georgiana blew her nose and furrowed her brow, “Lizzy, will you forgive me for behaving so childishly?” she asked her.

  Elizabeth smiled, “Georgie, you are not behaving childishly,” she assured her. “I am sure realizing how you feel about Colonel Fitzwilliam has been very difficult for you.”

  Georgiana sighed, “In some ways, it has; but in others, it seems so very natural that I wonder how I did not realize it sooner,” she admitted. “Richard had always been there for me. In my most difficult of times, he has been my constant comfort and strength. He has always been the one to cheer me up when I was downcast. He often goes out of his way to make me smile. I am always eager to see him. I always look forward to hearing his thoughts and sharing in conversation with him,” she said as she turned and looked out the window for a moment. “When he is away, I miss him. I miss his laugh, and his silly stories he is always telling me about the men in his regiment. I admire the way he cares for others, and the concern he has for the men in his command,” she explained. “That is why when I thought he was proposing to Kitty, I became so upset. The thought of him being in love with her just hurt so much that I felt I could not breathe.”

  Elizabeth understood, “Georgie, I know how hard this all must be for you right now. For a time after I left Pemberley and returned to Longbourn, I was certain William would want nothing more to do with me. I was so very sure that any feeling he had for me would be lost because of my sister’s elopement with Mr. Wickham,” she told her. “I remember very well how sick inside I felt when he first came to Longbourn after Lydia and Wickham were married. It was just before Mr. Bingley proposed to Jane. He called on us with Mr. Bingley but said nothing of his regard for me. I had no way of knowing how he truly felt and my heart ached so very much. I wanted to tell him how grateful I was for all that he had done and how very much I loved and adore him, but I had to wait and keep my feelings to myself.”

  “Oh Lizzy, how did you bear it?” she asked, her voice filled with desperation.

  “I had to, Georgie,” she told her. “I had to wait and let his actions be my guide, and that is what you must do as well. If the Colonel does have feelings for you, then when he is ready, he will make them known.”

  Georgiana looked down at her hands, “And if he should not have feelings for me, then what shall I do?” she asked her, trying to keep her emotions in check.

  Elizabeth considered what to say, “Then you shall have to do your best to let him go,” she told her honestly. “Georgie, it is all very romantic to say things like you love him so much you could die, or that you are desperate to be with him,” she told her. “But that kind of emotion is fleeting. Truly, if you think about it, were those not some of the very same things you said about Wickham at one time?”

  Georgiana narrowed her eyes, “Yes, I suppose they were,” she said as she thought about it. “But I was a foolish girl then. My feelings for Richard are so very different.”

  Elizabeth smiled, “I believe they are,” she assured her. “But you must show that now with how you conduct yourself. Georgie, if you truly do love Colonel Fitzwilliam, then do not be so anxious. Do not let your emotions rule you so. Demonstrate that love for him by doing as you have always done. Be his friend and companion first and care for him regardless if he should ever return that love for you,” Elizabeth told her. “Do you believe you can do that?”

  Georgiana sighed just a little as she thought about what Elizabeth said. “I believe I can, yes,” she said finally. “Lizzy, for now, would you please promise not to tell anyone about how I feel in regard to Richard?”

  “You do not wish me to tell William how your feelings have changed, is that it?” Elizabeth guessed.

  Georgiana shook her head, “No, I do not,” she told her. “If Richard is in love with Kitty and has no feelings for me, then I would not want to cause any strife between him and my brother. If William knew how I felt for my cousin, it might cause him to see Richard differently, and I do not wish for that to happen,” she explained. “Until such a time when either Richard makes his feelings for Kitty known…”

  “Or his feelings for you are made known,” Elizabeth interrupted.

  Georgiana smiled, “Yes, or until his feelings for me are made known, I would like very much to keep this between you and me,” she told her. “I will do my best to do as you have said. I will let Richard be my guide and see what comes of it. If he should give me some understanding of how he truly feels, then I will respond accordingly. If he is in love with Kitty, then I will do my best to wish him joy, and let him go,” she said softly.

  Elizabeth stood up and walked over to her sister-in-law, hugging her close for a moment. “Oh Georgie, I do not believe he loves Kitty,” she told her again. “In fact, I think before too long, you will see for yourself that he does not. It is very possible that Colonel Fitzwilliam and Kitty are nothing more than friends,” she told her. “Truly, I have not seen my sister show any regard for the Colonel beyond that of a friend.”

  Georgiana’s spirits seem to brighten just a little, “Really, Lizzy, do you mean that?” she asked her.

  Elizabeth nodded her head, “Yes,” she assured her. “In fact, the only man I have heard Kitty mention is Captain Hathaway,” she laughed.

  Georgiana’s smile widened, “Lizzy, if that be the case and it is not too late, then there is one more name I should very much like to add to the guest list for my ball; that of Captain John Hathaway.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Elizabeth sat in the parlor with her Aunt Gardiner, mother and sisters. She sipped her tea as she listened to her mother carry on about having to return to Longbourn. “I think it is very unkind to take us away to Longbourn so soon after Mary has married. Why it has only been a day since Mary has gone away to Lyme. Now we will not be here when she returns, and I have no way of knowing when I will get to see my dear girl again.”

  Elizabeth set her teacup aside. “I believe you will see Mary again very soon, Mama,” she told her. “For Mr. Godwin mentioned several times that he and Mary would call at Longbourn before Christmas time to see you and Papa when he is to visit with Mr. Hawkins,”

  Mrs. Bennet heaved a rather frustrated sigh, “Yes, yes…” she commented, sounding somewhat annoyed. “That may well be,” she said. After thinking for a moment, she began again, this time attempting a new approach. “But if we leave today, we will be unable to attend Miss Darcy’s coming out ball, and I so longed to go to the ball. I am sure it will be so very beautiful, and poor Lydia shall miss it as well. Perhaps, Lizzy, you could speak with your father?”

  Elizabeth knew what her mother was up to, “No Mama, I cannot speak to father. Can you not see, even if you were to remain in London, Lydia could not possibly attend Georgiana’s ball? I know she is not happy about it, but truly, it would be imprudent for her to appear in public so soon after having little Ben.”

  “Mama, Lizzy is right,” Jane told her. “Society demands that Lydia remain indoors and at home as much as possible for her lying-in. It is only for Lydia’s comfort that she is being removed to Longbourn so soon after giving birth. She will do better at home away from the noise and distraction of Lond
on,” she said as tactfully as she could.

  Mrs. Bennet rolled her eyes, “I suppose if it must be so, then it must,” she complained. “Oh, but now Kitty and Lizzy are to stay here and attend the ball, and then they are to return to Pemberley for how long…I am certain we will not see one another for Christmas time…”

  Jane glanced over at Elizabeth, “Yes, but Mama, I have already told you; Mr. Bingley and I will come to Netherfield soon after Miss Darcy has her coming out, and then we will have you and father come to stay with us at Netherfield.”

  Kitty chimed in, “After all, Mama, you do want me to find someone to marry, I think. I will hardly do so in Meryton with the officers all gone away and no eligible bachelors in the neighborhood.”

  Mrs. Bennet furrowed her brow, “Oh, yes! Lizzy, you must find our dear Kitty someone very soon!” she reminded her.

  Mrs. Gardiner sipped her tea, “I am sure both Lizzy and Jane will do their best in helping Kitty. I will be there and offer whatever assistance I can.”