Rory

by Jordan Marie

  Maybe someday.

  “Sleep, Gorgeous. Just close those beautiful green eyes and rest. I’ll keep you safe. You rest and let it all go. Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow,” I tell her, deciding to follow my own advice.

  “Noah?”

  “Yeah, Baby?”

  “You were wrong.”

  “About what?” I murmur, letting my fingers paint imaginary lines over her arm.

  “I’m not everything. There’s Ryan and he’s everything. You may not have gotten him with the dream you wanted, but he’s everything good and beautiful. He’s his own kind of dream,” she whispers. I think over her words and I do it smiling.

  “He is, but Rory, you have him too. You love Ryan and he loves you too. He belongs to you too, now.”

  She goes still in my arms, but she doesn’t reply. Eventually her breathing evens out and I figure she’s finally let sleep claim her. I close my eyes, my arms full of the woman I love and I send up a prayer to the man upstairs to help me find a way to prove to her that I mean what I say. I don’t know if he listens to me, but I figure it can’t hurt.

  “Sweet dreams, Gorgeous. I promise no one will ever hurt you again. I’m going to make sure you’re surrounded by nothing but family and good from here out. Even if you decide you can never forgive me, I’ll make sure you always have good in your life,” I vow, kissing the top of her head.

  Only then do I let myself fall to sleep too.

  40

  Rory

  When it comes to you, I’ll never be done.

  I’ll always keep trying, I don’t have a choice. Without you, nothing else matters...

  * * *

  It’s barely daylight outside. The morning sun is pale and just starting to peek through the curtains. A glance at the clock on the nightstand tells me it’s barely five in the morning. Sometime during the night our positions shifted and Noah is on his back and I’m on my side, my head resting on his chest, my leg draped over one of his. His warm body fighting away the morning chill. I look up to find his eyes are closed and he’s still sleeping.

  His words woke me up, however. They just keep replaying over and over in my head.

  * * *

  You’re not a fence I’m trying to mend.

  You’re the reason I’m still breathing.

  You’re everything, Gorgeous. Every. Fucking. Thing.

  * * *

  More keep coming. All words he gave me last night. All words I listened to, but words I was too hurt to truly listen to. I don’t have a choice this morning. They’re all swirling in my head like a broken melody, looking for someone to sing them.

  * * *

  You love Ryan and he loves you too. He belongs to you too, now.

  * * *

  Did he mean that? Does he have any idea what that means to me?

  * * *

  I wanted my child to always have the influence of a good woman’s touch, because I had never known that and I knew it was important.

  If you let me in—if you let me just get my foot in the door, I swear that I will work my ass into the ground so that you never have a reason to regret it. I swear to Christ, Rory. I’ll never give you a reason to regret it.

  * * *

  The words keep coming and my body trembles. I slide away from Noah—just enough so I don’t disturb him. I try to shut them down, but all of it just keeps going around and around in my brain until I get to the one, that last night I didn’t take in at all. The one thing he said that I didn’t pay attention to at all.

  * * *

  I’m a fucking asshole, but I love you...

  I loved you then, Rory. I love you more now.

  * * *

  Those words stick in my head now, and they don’t let me go.

  Noah hurt me. He hurt me more than I thought was possible, more than King ever could—just because I never gave anyone what I gave Noah. But, can I really blame him for reacting the way he did? What man wouldn’t if he thought he took steps to prevent pregnancy—especially if women like Vicki were what he was exposed to? It doesn’t fix everything, but it goes a long way toward soothing the hurt.

  I tilt my head so I can see Noah. He’s still asleep; his face, much paler than it was back in Montana, is at least peaceful. His dark lashes are fanned out, his hair still pulled back, but sleep has let some of it break free from its hold.

  I love Noah. I’m pretty sure I will always love him. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. If King ever gets a hold of me again, I won’t have a tomorrow. He’ll kill me for taking Ryan away. Which is fair, because if I see him again, I’m going to try and kill him. He deserves to die and if I’m the one that sends him to hell… I won’t lose a minute of sleep over it.

  I make up my mind. Maybe I’m doing something that is a huge mistake. Maybe I will regret it at some point, but right now… I want Noah. I want to be with him. I want… No. I need to feel his touch. I need his arms around me and his body on mine. I need him deep inside of me and just for a little while, I really need to pretend I’m whole again.

  Before I can talk myself out of it, I reach down and find the drawstring to Noah’s gym pants, loosening it. I look up at him, expecting him to be looking at me. His head moves on the pillow, but he doesn’t wake. I’m glad. I think if he woke up, I’d lose my nerve. I’m able to maneuver so that I can get his pants down just a little. I want more, but I’ll take this. I’m just glad that he’s wearing this kind of pants, instead of jeans, during his recovery. I glance up at Noah’s face and he’s still asleep. His forehead has wrinkled and his lips move a little before he burrows a little more into his pillow. I smile, because in sleep he’s still sexy, but somehow, he still manages to pull off being cute too.

  I slide my hand down into his pants. The heat I feel there makes me tremble and I want to groan as I encircle his shaft. I close my eyes from the pure pleasure of it. I never thought I’d be able to touch him again, even after finding out he was still alive I thought he was lost to me forever. Maybe that’s what makes this feel so special, but, for whatever reason, I’m grateful.

  Noah is semi-hard and as my hand moves slowly up his heated shaft, I can feel him grow. His cock stretches, comes to life quickly, jerking in my hand as I squeeze him. I hear him above me, moaning. The sound is muffled and thick with sleep. I want to look up and see him, but I don’t—I’m afraid if I do, I’ll lose my nerve.

  I swallow and the sound seems extra loud to my ears. My heart is racing, thumping hard against my chest, as I push his shirt up and kiss his stomach. The feel of his heated skin against my lips, the salty male taste is no different than I remember. It’s exactly the same and it feels like home. Memories flood my mind of each time we were together, of how beautiful it was, and they all serve as remembrances of the fact that I love this man so deeply that the love somehow altered my soul.

  Words come back, yet again. They are blaring in my brain with their intensity—burning me.

  * * *

  When it comes to you, I’ll never be done.

  I’ll always keep trying, I don’t have a choice.

  Without you, nothing else matters...

  * * *

  I kiss down to his navel. Sliding my body down the bed, and letting my tongue flick against him, placing my kiss there.

  “Rory,” Noah groans above me. I feel his hands come down. One to my shoulder, just lying against it as if it’s enough to just touch me—and it is. It’s another reminder that he’s here, that I’m here. His other hand comes to the back of my head, his fingers dive into my hair and contract in it. “Gorgeous.”

  He breathes that one word, as if it is one long, broken exhale of breath, but there seems to be so much meaning behind it that it feels like my heart literally squeezes in my chest. I’ve always secretly loved that nickname. Probably because no one in my life ever made me feel beautiful until Noah. With him, the term gorgeous never feels fake. It feels like that’s how he really sees me—even now.

  Now that I know he’s awake, even thou
gh I still don’t have the nerve to look at him, I give up trying to be careful and I push his pants down. Noah lifts up just enough so they slide below his hips and his cock is exposed in its naked beauty. It is beautiful too. Broad, thick and long, it’s the type of cock that ruins a woman for other men. I slide so that I’m exactly where I need to be. I take his cock back in my hand, stroking him firmly, my grip strong against his heated shaft. The head is glossy with his pre-cum. There’s a large vein running down the underside of his cock and I flatten my tongue against it. I can almost feel his pulse, as he somehow hardens even more, pushing against my tight grip. I lick him slowly and as I reach his slickened head, I moan at the taste of him.

  This, I had forgotten. His taste, dark, musky, a little sweet, a little bitter and yet all combined to be something I craved at night, even when I tried to hate him. I let my tongue play against his head, dipping into the small opening and bringing more of his juices on the tip of my tongue. I greedily suck it down, pumping him with my hand to find more. I’m so lost in what I’m doing, I’m startled when Noah’s hold in my hair tightens and he pulls so that I’m forced to look up at him.

  “Look at me, Gorgeous,” he whispers, his voice deep with hunger, comes out throaty and almost tortured. “If we do this, it means something.”

  His words cause my heartbeat to accelerate. I’m not sure I’m ready for that, nor the implication that it means something to him. Panic is surging inside of me.

  “It doesn’t have to, Noah. I’m not sure I want it to.” My words are quiet, but I can hear the fear laced in them and I’m sure that Noah does too. Maybe I should try to be brave, but I feel like I’ve had this fear inside of me for so long now that I’ll never be free from it.

  “Maybe not, Rory. But it does to me. I love you, Sweetheart,” he tells me gently. His face a mix of softness and hunger.

  I love you, Sweetheart.

  More of his words to add to the hundreds that seem to be playing a refrain inside my head. My hand squeezes his cock tighter in reaction.

  I can’t give him the words back. I feel them. I’ll always love him, but I can’t give them to him. Instead, I pull against his hold, and slide his cock deep in my mouth, groaning around it and losing myself in the pleasure of having him again.

  41

  Diesel

  “Fuck,” I hiss the word out as Rory takes me into her greedy mouth. The pleasure is so intense that my damn eyes roll back in my head. I thrust up, wanting even deeper into her throat. My fingers tighten in her hair as I sink deeper into that hot, wet, haven.

  When Rory moans, her mouth stuffed full of my cock, it vibrates in my fucking balls. Jesus, I’ve missed her. I thought I had lost her forever. Last night, I thought there was no way to keep her in my life and I envisioned my world dark without her. I wasn’t even sure I could go on without her. My heart was already grieving. Then, she gave me a spark of hope, asking me to stay. Even then, even after everything we talked about, I never dreamed I would wake up to this. I hope she realizes that her giving me her body this morning means she will never leave me. I’m not letting her go again. If she doesn’t, I’ll show her.

  Rory is mine.

  I was a stupid fuck, but I’ve had beauty taken away from me. I was a man who thought he lost everything. I’m not letting it go again.

  I can’t.

  I watch as she sucks me. Her hand at the base of my cock, her lips moving up and down, her tongue creating a torturous pleasure as she slides back and forth. It’s been so long. I can feel the heat gathering in my balls. The need to shoot my cum into her mouth and watch her swallow it down is so strong, it’s staggering.

  But this is Rory.

  This is the first time I’ve had her back in my bed—the first time she’s given herself to me since I hurt her—since I thought I had lost her… since I thought I lost everything. That means, I can’t let it go down that path. I need inside of her. I want to look into her eyes as I bury my cock deep into her, so deep that she can feel me even after I’m forced to leave. I want to paint the inside of her womb with my cum. I want to do it knowing that if we create life, that the past won’t be repeated. I want to give her my child freely and watch her grow round, knowing that the life I’ve always wanted is right there before me, even sweeter than the dream because it is with Rory.

  I want all that and more.

  “Rory, stop,” I moan, as she does something with her tongue against the head of my cock that causes my body to jerk and I can feel cum dripping out. I growl, biting down to keep from spilling my load and giving her what her eager little mouth is searching for. “Rory, Baby, you have to stop,” I grunt, so close to coming my body is trembling.

  “No,” she growls around my cock, diving back down, sucking so hard that I swear I can see fucking stars. “Want your cum, Noah,” she cries, when I reach down, gathering her hair in my fist and holding her still. It’s almost too late, because I feel a small jet of cum release into her mouth and when she fucking purrs, the temptation to give into what we both want is so strong, it nearly does me in.

  “I need inside of you, Gorgeous. I need it so fucking bad,” I groan.

  When she moves back from me, going up on her knees to look at me, I waste no time. I push my pants down more than what they were, finally kicking them off of the bed. I raise up just enough to take my shirt off and when I look at Rory, she’s just staring at me, her eyes round with surprise. I don’t understand it until she reaches out and touches the scars on my stomach. She hasn’t seen them before. There were bandages in the hospital when she saw me and since then… she’s held herself back so much that I’ve never been around her without a shirt on. I look down as her fingers trail against the scars that were caused by the surgery and the bullets. It’s not pretty, but they haven’t bothered me. To me they are a symbol that I will fight no matter what, for what is important—for my family.

  “Noah,” she whispers her face tortured as she turns those green eyes to me. They’re sparkling with tears that want released, but she’s refusing to shed. “Noah,” she whispers again.

  “It’s in the past, Rory. We have now. I need you,” I respond, reminding her that we have here and now. I can’t go back and fix the past, and she can’t go back and change it. It’s over, but we can go forward and I’m going to. I’m moving forward with her.

  I pull on her shirt and that seems to be enough to jar her away from her thoughts, but she still resists at first.

  “Noah, I don’t need to—”

  “I want to see your tits bounce as you’re riding me, Gorgeous. Take the fucking shirt off,” I order, my patience nearing an end.

  “You’re such a man,” she says softly, a smile in her voice. When I look up at her, she’s pulling her shirt off, and even laughing a little as she does it.

  “Thank God for that,” I answer truthfully. “Now, take off those sexy panties you have on and climb up here and ride your man.”

  She does what I say, her face coloring with embarrassment, but instead of climbing on top of me she stretches, reaching for the nightstand.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Looking for condoms. I thought I saw some in there.”

  She’s right there are, but I don’t want a fucking condom between us. I want nothing between us, and I want my cum deep inside of her.

  “We don’t need fucking condoms, Gorgeous. I need to fuck you raw. I want to feel you—all of you.”

  Her face goes pale and she actually recoils from me.

  What in the fuck?

  “No, Noah. Not without a condom,” she says and she looks like she’s ready to bolt.

  I want to argue. I’m not a bit fucking happy about her demand. This little voice inside of me however, is telling me to pick my battles. I’m getting Rory back in my bed—in my arms, that’s a big step and I have to be happy enough with that—at least for now.

  I reach over and pull open the drawer, grabbing a condom, ripping it open with my teeth. The damn things have bee
n in there forever, maybe I’ll get lucky and they’ll be worthless.

  “I hope like Christ you’re ready for me, because I don’t think I have it in me to wait right now, Rory,” I warn her as I roll the condom on quickly—disappointed my cock doesn’t rip through it.

  “I’m definitely ready,” she whispers. Just to make sure, I take my fingers and slide them between the lips of her pussy, liquid heat immediately gathers against them. She’s drenched. She stretches her leg out and slides over my body, poising herself above me. Her head is bent down, the dark auburn halo of hair slides around her face, a few strands of hair falling against her chest, creating a path to her breasts, the nipples upturned and begging for attention. I reach down and rub my fingers, that are covered in her juices, against her nipple. Her body quivers as she wraps her hand around my cock.

  Jesus, fuck… Gorgeous isn’t enough of a description.

  She lowers slowly, guiding my cock into her.

  “God, Noah. You feel so good,” she whimpers, her head going back, her eyes closing as she bites into her bottom lip.

  I lean up and suck her nipple into my mouth, torturing it, while teasing the other with my hand. I’m rewarded with her tight little cunt, trembling all around my cock.

  “Missed you, Gorgeous,” I growl.

  She starts riding me, her pussy clenching my cock so tight that it’s a wonder she doesn’t break it. I’m that damn hard.

  “I missed you too, Noah,” she whispers riding slowly up and down on my cock, lost in her pleasure.

  Slow is nice. It’s a great fucking show, but I’m too damn close. My hands bite into her hips as I surge up, thrusting deep into her as I pull her down. I take over, going hard and fast and it’s just a minute before she follows my lead.