Rory

by Jordan Marie

  “Christ,” I murmur under my breath. My hand shaking from the pain and anger I’m feeling. My tears have stopped and in their place is an anger so raw it may never leave me.

  “I bit Wolf because I wanted to try and help her. I was afraid she was dying because there was so much blood. And he threw me on the ground. Rory said my name and tried to reach for me, even though she couldn’t even open her eyes. Why would she do that, Dad?” he cries. “Why would she say my name?”

  “I don’t know son. I think maybe…”

  “Do you think… do you think it’s because she blamed me?” he cries. “If I had just called him dad… If I had called him dad, Rory wouldn’t have been hurt. If I had been stronger I could have protected us. I could have kept her safe. That’s what you would have done.”

  “I think Rory was just trying to make sure you were okay, Ryan, even then she was just trying to make sure you were okay,” I tell him, my voice raw.

  I’ve fucked up so much. If I look back on all of the shit I put Rory through, all of the mistrust and the pain I gave her only to have her sacrifice herself for Ryan like she did… I’m feeling so many emotions, I can’t even begin to sift through them all.

  “Why? Why would she do that?” he asks again. “She shouldn’t have worried ‘bout me. It was my fault. It was all my fault.”

  “It’s not, Ryan. It’s King’s fault. He was the adult. He wanted to hurt you and hurt Rory. Nothing you could have done would have made a difference. If you had called him dad, he still would have hurt her. You aren’t responsible.”

  “But, Rory—”

  “Rory loves you Ryan. She was protecting you because she loves you.”

  “I love her too, Daddy. I want to keep her. Can we keep her, Daddy? I heard her tell Dani that she wasn’t staying here forever, but I want her to Daddy. I want her to.”

  “We’re going to keep her, Ryan,” I whisper, holding him close. “We’re going to keep her,” I vow, praying I can do exactly that, because the alternative isn’t something I can live with.

  “When the medicine killed Mommy… Rory was scared for me. She…She tried to protect me then too.”

  “I’m sorry you saw that Ryan.”

  “Daddy am I bad like the monster?”

  “Why would you even ask that? There’s nothing bad about you, Ryan.”

  “Rory kept me from seeing Mommy die. She wasn’t supposed to. The monster was going to punish her for it, but he had to leave... But after…”

  “After?”

  “After she ‘splained it was the medicine and that Mommy didn’t mean what she said.”

  “What did she say?”

  “That she never wanted me. Rory thought Mommy didn’t mean it. But that’s because Rory’s not like Mommy. Rory loves me. But… maybe I am like the monster Daddy.”

  “Why would you say that?”

  “Because I looked at Mommy when she said that and I was sad, because... I wanted Rory to be my Mommy. I wanted Mommy to go away… I wished she would go away forever… and then the medicine killed her. That makes me bad, doesn’t it, Daddy? I’m bad too.”

  I gather Ryan up in my arms. I just hold him, whispering over and over that he’s not bad and letting him cry. I don’t know how long we’re like that, but I know that by the time Ryan stops crying my shirt is soaking wet and my heart aches so much it’s barely beating. I hold my son, letting him cry out everything he’s been holding in and I do it while plotting the millions of ways that I intend on making King pay.

  I’m going to make that motherfucker bleed rivers of fucking blood before I let him die.

  49

  Diesel

  I adjust Ryan’s head on the pillow. He cried himself to sleep. The pain, sadness and fear were so much that it wore his little body out. I held him through it all, and I’ve held him for the last hour, just watching him sleep. I need to talk to Rory, I need to go to her. She’ll be worried, but I need to just hold her and see her… I need to fucking get down on my knees and beg her to forgive me.

  As I get Ryan settled, however, that’s not what is first on my list. I can’t see Rory like this.

  Not like this.

  There’s too much anger inside of me. I’ve got to work through that. I need to get a handle on it and lock it down before I see her again.

  I cover Ryan up and then quietly leave his room. I flag down one of the prospects in the hall.

  “I need you to stand in front of my son’s room. If he wakes up scared or calls for me, you find me in the gym. If you can’t find me, get him to my old lady. You got that?”

  “Got it, Pres,” he says and I watch as he goes and stands at my son’s door, crossing his arms across his chest and planting his body in a stance that dares anyone to try and get past him.

  Now that that’s done I head straight to the gym. I pass others, but they don’t speak. Maybe they can tell by the look on my face that they need to leave me the fuck alone. It’s a fucking good thing that I don’t run into Gunner. Right now, beating in his way-too-pretty-of-a-face seems like a damn good idea.

  I burst through the double doors to the club gym. I have my own workout room now, but there’s no bag there and I need to beat the fuck out of something. Actually, I need to beat the fuck out of King, but for now I’ll just pretend the damn bag is his face.

  I lift my shirt over my head, throwing it down. I don’t bother taping my hands. I don’t want to protect my knuckles. I want to hit the fuck out of them until they bleed. Maybe the pain will distract me enough to keep me from driving to that fucking castle and attacking King now.

  I slam my fist into the bag over and over. Each hit seems to be a reminder of something I failed to do.

  Failed to keep filth from touching my son. Failed to protect him from his crack whore of a mother. Failed to keep him safe. Failed to recognize that Rory was a woman who would rather die than lie to anyone. Failed to give her the love she deserved. Failed to keep her safe.

  “I fucking failed to do every fucking thing!” I scream as I deliver another hit to the bag.

  “Hoss, much more of that and I don’t know what is going to drop first, the bag or your hands. You’re bleeding all over the place,” Crusher says, entering the room.

  “I don’t give a fuck. I want to bleed. I deserve to bleed. Rory bled. Who was there to take care of her, Crusher? No one! Not one fucking person!” I growl, slamming my fist into the bag again.

  “Man, you need to let it go. You were fighting for your life. You’re here now. You’re here when it matters.”

  “It fucking mattered then!” I roar. Slamming my fists over and over into the bag.

  Crusher comes up and holds the bag solidly in his hands.

  “You’re right it did, but you can’t go back, Hoss.”

  “Get the fuck away, Crusher. You don’t get it,” I growl, slamming my fists so hard over and over into the bag, screaming when Crusher just goes back on his foot, but doesn’t truly budge.

  “The hell I don’t. Don’t you think I’ve been right there in your fucking shoes, Diesel? Have you forgotten how I almost lost my fucking woman? The hell I went through with my own fucking club for not helping me get to her sooner?”

  “He beat her with a belt, Crusher. He kicked her… he beat her until she was bleeding. Do you know what that bleeding was, Crush? It was her losing my fucking baby. A baby I gave her hell over and refused to believe was mine! He spit on my fucking woman!” I growl, the words feeling as if they are being ripped out of my damn soul.

  “And you’ll get revenge, Brother. I fucking promise you that you will make him pay for it all,” Crusher promises.

  “I treated her like she was no better than Violet, man,” I finally say, the words quieter and full of misery instead of anger. I drop to the ground on my ass, leaning against the wall. “I made her pay for the whores that came before her and all she gave me was love. She gave me all of her, man, and I took it. I took it because I fucking needed it and it brought me peace. I was
a selfish son of a bitch and all she tried to do was love me.”

  “You’ll make it up to her.”

  “I treated her like shit and still, she kept my son safe, she protected him and found a way to call the fucking FBI to protect me.”

  “Lock it down, Hoss. Lock it the fuck down, so you can make it up to her.”

  “How do I even begin to make it up to her?” I ask, feeling hopeless.

  “You make sure you give her all her dreams,” he answers.

  “I don’t even know what that is.”

  “Then, you find out and you kill your ass to do it. Why do you think I have enough kids to field my own football team? Fuck, I’ve added on to our house twice now. She strikes for another kid I’m giving up. I’m just going to buy a house with thirty bedrooms.”

  “I love her, Crusher.”

  “I know, Hoss.”

  “I’ve wanted what you had, what Dragon and Skull had all my life… and I pushed it away until it was almost too late.”

  “But it’s not. There’s time to fix it… so fix it.”

  I nod.

  “You got it under control now?” he asks.

  “Yeah.”

  “Good. Dani owes me her mouth tonight,” he says with a wink, turning to leave.

  “What happened to you making her dreams come true. That sounds more like it’s your dreams,” I mutter.

  “That’s the thing about relationships, Hoss. It’s all about the give and take,” he says as he leaves.

  I watch him go and slowly pull my ass up. I grab a towel off a table and wrap it around the hand that has the most damage on the knuckles. They’re already sore as hell, but I’ll deal. I dab the blood off the other hand, trying to figure out what to do next.

  I decide to go by the office, sift through some paperwork and when that doesn’t take enough time, I call and check on Torrent and Devil. She’s having a difficult labor, but they’re doing okay. I should be there to support him, but I can’t force myself to be there. Not yet.

  It’s fucking late by the time I move my ass back to my room and seek Rory out. My mind is still a mess, but I couldn’t stay away. I need my woman more than air.

  As expected, Rory’s in bed. I walk slowly toward her, taking a breath.

  “Are you awake, Gorgeous?” I ask her softly, because she left the light on. There’s a chance she’s awake.

  She doesn’t stir. I’ve been in bed with her for a bit now, but when we’ve come together, each time it’s been hurried. Ryan said that King pushed Rory down and ripped her clothes and beat her with a belt. I kneel down and then as carefully as I can I pull up the silk pajama top she’s wearing. At first I don’t see it. I have to look closely. There, just below her shoulder blade, is the first one. It’s thin and feels almost like a spider web. It’s not a big scar, probably caused by the buckle. There are a few more and I brush my finger softly over each and every one of them. Rory whimpers a little, but doesn’t wake.

  “Protected my son, when I wasn’t there. Put yourself in danger for him. Tried to defend his fucking mother, all to make my boy feel safe and loved when no one else could. I’m going to make him pay, Rory. I’m going to make him bleed and I can’t bring our baby back, but I’ll send King to hell. I promise you Gorgeous. I promise.” She still doesn’t wake, which is probably a good thing with the fucking mess my brain is. “And I promise you, Rory. I’ll find out what your dreams are and I’ll do everything in my power to give them to you. I’ll give you every last one of them… and more.”

  She doesn’t hear my vow, but just giving it to her makes me feel better.

  50

  Rory

  “Noah,” I moan, waking up to find my body on fire. My hips thrust up off the mattress as his fingers slide deep inside of me. I reach down blindly and my hands find his hair and I grab it, roughly, pushing on his head as I thrust to grind against his mouth.

  “You taste so fucking good, Gorgeous. Nothing better in this world than your sweet pussy,” he growls against my clit, before moving his tongue over it so lightly that it’s almost a painful tease.

  “Noah,” I gasp again. “I need…”

  “What do you need, Rory? Tell me and I’ll give it to you,” he urges. I feel his hands move to hold onto my ass as he tilts me into him and then his tongue is diving inside of me, his lips, teeth… God, I feel it all as he eats at my pussy.

  “You…” I cry, so close to coming I can feel it and it’s going to be huge when it does.

  Noah shifts, so his fingers dive back into my pussy, the tips of his fingers sliding against my wet walls. Then, I feel his teeth, nibbling against my clit. My legs are over his shoulders, as he takes control of my body. I’m completely at his mercy and I love every minute of it. When he sucks my clit into his mouth, his tongue gently lapping against it, while he finger-fucks me hard. My body tightens and I cry out as I come so hard I could almost see stars.

  My hands tighten into his hair so tight that it’s a wonder I don’t pull it out, as I ride out my orgasm. Noah continually laps at my pussy, helping to bring me down.

  “That’s my girl,” he whispers against my tender pussy, his hot breath sending pleasurable chills over my body. “My gorgeous, beautiful, sweet as sugar, girl,” he adds, as I relax against the bed.

  His words of praise pour over me and I open my eyes to look down at him. He’s staring up at me, a look on his face that I can’t quite place, but there’s an intensity to it that makes my heart beat faster.

  “Noah,” I breathe out. It’s one word, just his name, but it’s full of everything I am feeling at that moment… Confusion, hunger, happiness, sadness, need, satisfaction… and perhaps most importantly, love. My relationship with Noah is nothing else if not complicated.

  “Good morning, Gorgeous,” Noah murmurs softly against my lips.

  I taste myself on his lips, which adds to the deliciously wicked feeling flowing through me right now. His rough hand slides against the side of my throat, making me want to purr. When he pulls back just enough space so he can look at me, I catch that intense look on his face again. It hasn’t softened at all despite the pleasure he’s given me.

  I bring my hand up and drag my thumb through his short beard and the scruff on his face. I blush as I see signs of my orgasm glistening there.

  “It’s definitely a good morning now,” I tell him and I watch hypnotized as his beautiful lips spread into a cocky smile. It makes me grin too, as my heart flips in my chest.

  “I guess I’ll have to wake you up that way every morning then—just to make sure my baby always has a great day.”

  “I don’t think I’d have a complaint. Of course, it could get a little repetitive after a while,” I giggle.

  “I’ll make sure I get inventive,” he murmurs, coming back in for a quick kiss, before breaking away and lying on his back. I immediately curl into him, wanting to stay close to him.

  “Where’s Ryan?” I ask, as I slowly come away from my orgasm and instead have my thoughts return to yesterday.

  “He woke up early. I took him to the kitchen for breakfast. He’s doing some schoolwork with Dani now. They still keep Tyler on homeschool, because he’s having issues adjusting to being around people. He feels safer with Dani and Crusher closer.”

  “Safer?” I ask, remembering that Tyler is closer to Ryan’s age, but they don’t interact much. Dani said they had only adopted him a few months back and he’s had a rough life which was making it hard for him to be around the other kids. I didn’t ask her to explain before, I didn’t want to pry, but now I find myself curious.

  “I’m not sure, Gorgeous. I know his father was abusive and he was there for several years before being removed from the home and put into the system.”

  “That’s sad,” I whisper, laying my head against Noah’s chest, enjoying the sound of his heartbeat drumming in my ear. “Parents are supposed to protect their children, not hurt them.”

  “I know, Gorgeous. I know,” he says, with a definite edg
e to his voice.

  “How’s Ryan? I got worried when you didn’t come back yesterday.”

  “He’s hurting. My son has a lot to recover from. His biggest being the fact that you were hurt because of him.”

  “Oh no. Noah, he wasn’t. Not really. King…”

  “Is a dead man,” he says, his voice solid and so cold that Noah gives me chills again, but these aren’t pleasurable at all.

  “Noah, King would have—”

  “Gorgeous, I know we need to talk about everything, but I can’t right now. Hearing what my son told me gutted me. I don’t think I can handle more right now and still function and do the things I need to do,” he responds, his hold on me tightening.

  “I… Okay,” I whisper, unsure of myself. I can hear the anger in Noah’s voice and I know he’s trying to keep a tight hold on it. I have to worry about what Ryan told him.

  “It’ll be okay, Rory. I promise. I’m going to make it okay,” he says. His voice is so full of anger and hurt that I want to ease it. I want to bring him the kind of peace that I seem to only find in his arms.

  “Maybe we should forget everything for a bit, except each other,” I murmur, hooking my leg over his body and lifting so I’m sitting on him, a knee pressed in against each of his thighs.

  “What do you have in mind, Gorgeous?” he asks, that hot as fuck smile coming across his lips again.

  “A workout maybe? I know how you enjoy those and it must be said I do like it when you get all sweaty.”

  “You do?” he asks with a hint of a laugh.

  “Definitely,” I murmur, bucking against his cock, which is definitely hard and pushing up against me. I move just enough so his shaft slides between the lips of my pussy and I groan at how good the sensation feels.