Seeking Hope: Book 2 in the Seeking Saga

by Becky Poirier

  “If I’d knocked you to the ground, I might have made-out with you, but I figure a peck is all the healing you need for a tiny little bump.”

  “I think you just broke my heart a little…what will that get me?” I leaned in slowly pressed my lips against his and was just about to pull away to tease him back when he wrapped his arms around me pulling me in tightly. His lips pressed passionately against mine, with an intensity that nearly knocked me off my feat. Heat flooded every inch of my body, sending waves of desire surging throughout.

  Just like with every other kiss, I felt myself completely losing control and I liked it. He leaned his body into mine. We were pressed up against the side of the bathhouse now, completely oblivious to the world around us. I felt Jack’s hand slide up under my coat and shirt. The cold air threatened to give me a chill, but the heat of his hand kept my body temp up. Where his hand caressed my back, it felt like tiny little flames danced on my skin. I pressed into him even closer, leaving no room between us now. I could feel the heat of his body through the many layers of winter clothing we both had on.

  Normally we never went this far. One or both of us, would pull away before the desire became more than we could stand. But today, neither of us was willing to let go. I was just about to suggest that we go into the bathhouse and lock the doors, which was a big no-no, according to the rules of conduct here. I was pretty sure he would have said yes to that if it weren’t for the interruption that came next.

  “You two should really get a room already. The P.D.A is enough to make me gag,” Michelle’s obnoxious voice declared.

  She might as well have just thrown a large bucket of ice water over our heads. It certainly was a mood killer. Jack let go of me reluctantly, leaving me feeling empty and cold. I glared at Michelle. Normally I chose to ignore her, especially seeing as she’d been doing such a good job of ignoring us. But for whatever reason, today she’d decided it was time to get back to her old nastiness.

  “I was so enjoying the silent treatment you’d been giving us. Why go and ruin a good thing. You’d been doing so well,” I said, with as much disdain as I could. Michelle scowled back at me. “We’re not the only ones who’ve been enjoying the silence, Michelle. Trust me, people tolerate you a lot better when you keep your mouth shut.”

  I can’t even explain why I lost it with her. I’d managed to keep a cool head since I’d come to live here, but for whatever reason, the April within me was unleashed and I just couldn’t rein it in. Even with Jack’s not so subtle back rub. Even his touch couldn’t calm me now.

  “You think you’ve won?” she said, with malice in her voice stepping closer to me. “You haven’t. I still have more power here than you’ll ever understand. I have my father’s ear. You two go ahead and enjoy this while it lasts. Which won’t be much longer.”

  Now normally, a threat like that from Michelle, I would take as completely empty. But there was something about the confidence she exuded while making her statement that made me think there was at least some partial truth to it. She hadn’t moved on and accepted Jack and me. She’d been planning and plotting, and she thought she had something to end us. What it could possibly be, I had no idea. It was all I could do to maintain my composure until she marched off out of sight.

  Jack placed his hand in mine, squeezing it for reassurance. “You shouldn’t have egged her on like that. It’s like poking a rattle snake with a stick.”

  “I know,” I grunted. “I just lost it. There’s only so much a person can stand before they snap and that was my moment. She’s going to make things worse for us, isn’t she?” I asked as my stomach flip flopped.

  Jack smiled and shook his head. “She doesn’t have any real power and her father is smart enough to know better than to let her make any real decisions. Likely, we’ll just get some longer work shifts.”

  I might have believed Jack if his smile had reached his eyes, but it didn’t. It barely even reached dimple stage. He was staring off in Michelle’s direction, trying not to look worried. He knew her better than I did and if he was worried, then I should be too. There wasn’t much we could do about her threats without having a clue what she was planning. We let the subject drop and tried to get back to normal as we headed off to the dining hall.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Sunday was always my favourite day, because it meant that I got to spend the whole day with Jack. But with Michelle’s threat weighing heavily on my mind, I found it hard to let it go and just be with my boyfriend. My sister noticed something was off with me at brunch and tried to get me to talk when Jack and his brother left our table briefly. I didn’t want to talk about it and especially in public. I promised her we’d talk about it tonight before bed. It was the last thing I wanted to do. If I could lose it with Michelle like that, then my sister was likely to go off the deep end. But just like the uncomfortable sex talk she’d wanted to have, this conversation could only be delayed, not stopped.

  Jack tried to get us back to normal, but I wasn’t making it easy. He was doing his best to put the Michelle threats behind him. And I think he was being sincere about letting it go for the moment, but I just couldn’t. No distraction was strong enough. He’d had a whole day planned for us, and it didn’t matter what activity we did, I just couldn’t relax.

  We’d just finished ice fishing on the small pond in our village. We didn’t catch anything despite his assurances that the pond was stocked full of fish. And after all that, I was freezing, and I was just ready to call it a day. Dinner was going to be served in an hour and we’d been out almost the entire day. I was cold and stressed and I just wanted to cozy up by the fireplace in my cabin. Most of all I wanted some separation from Jack. I felt like I was bumming him out and that wasn’t what I wanted but I also couldn’t pretend that everything was okay.

  “Just one more activity, I promise,” Jack insisted. “And this one will surely put the smile back on your face. Come on. You have to at least let me try,” he said, with a puppy dog pout on his face.

  “Fine, one more, but then I’m going back to my cabin. The sun’s going to set soon, and I don’t want to be any colder than I already am.”

  He smiled at me, and this time the smile reached his gorgeous brown eyes. How could I possibly resist those eyes? He pulled out a handkerchief for me. “Don’t worry it’s clean,” he said with a chuckle, as he went behind me and covered my eyes with it. “No peeking. You’re not allowed to ruin this surprise.”

  His handkerchief wasn’t very thick, so I wasn’t completely blind. Even with the little bit of light I still had coming through, I managed to get quite disoriented. After ten minutes, I lost track of where we were. I thought I knew every inch of the village, but even with my sight limited, I was sure that I’d never been to this spot before. There was a strange sound coming from up ahead. I recognized it; but couldn’t put my finger on what it was.

  “Duck,” Jack said, as he placed his hand gently on top of my head. I obeyed, ducking as low as I thought I needed to. I could feel Jack doing the same behind me. As we continued, I felt shrubbery rubbing up against my winter coat. I needed to stop once because my glove snagged on a branch. Jack gently untangled it for me, making sure not to tear the yarn from my glove.

  The sound grew as we neared its location. It wasn’t until we were practically on top of it, that I finally recognized it. “A waterfall?” I asked Jack. It certainly sounded like one, though not as loud as the ones I’d encountered in the past.

  Jack slowly untied the blindfold. The light hit me, suddenly disorienting me for just a moment; before the scene unfolded before my eyes. Jack was right. I couldn’t help but smile at what I was seeing. Just in front of us was a tiny little pond which fed into a little stream and above the pond was a small waterfall trickling down the rocky edge of the small cliff. The water appeared to be steaming.

  “It’s even better,” Jack finally replied. “It’s a hot spring.”

  I pulled off my glove, leaned down and gently touched the wa
ter. Sure enough, the water was quite warm. It was a lot warmer than the showers we were allowed to take. Even during the winter, our showers were temperature controlled to save on resources. If you didn’t make it to the bathhouse early enough, you ended up with an ice-cold shower. This was heaven in comparison.

  Around the spring, there was still some grass not covered by snow. The further away from the spring, the more snow there was on the ground. We were surrounded by snow covered brush. It was like a little secret garden oasis. It was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

  “Where are we?” I asked.

  “My secret hideaway. Billy doesn’t even know this place exists.”

  “We’re still inside the village?” I asked, a little nervous of the answer.

  “I’d never risk your life, taking you beyond the wall, even for something as amazing as this. This is just a section of the village that hasn’t been developed and I intend to keep it that way.”

  “How have you kept it a secret?”

  “Most people don’t like wandering too far from the centre of the village and they really don’t like going near the wall. We’re pretty close here. Though there aren’t any guard stations around this area, so again no one to find out about it.”

  “But how does the water get through the wall then.”

  “We’ve dug small tunnels through the wall to allow fresh water to flow through. This water source comes from further up the mountain. No one’s bothered checking what exactly it feeds into. It eventually meets up with the stream by the large fishpond. I take it you like it.”

  I shook my head. “No. I love it. Thank you for sharing this with me.” I stood up and wrapped my arms around him, allowing myself to feel the peace this place naturally brought with it. I relaxed into his chest feeling the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat.

  “Anything to see you smile.”

  We stayed there as long as we could. If it weren’t for the cold, we might have skipped out on dinner and just sat there for several more hours. We didn’t even need to talk. All we needed was to relax with the soothing sounds of the spring, sitting side by side with my head resting on his shoulder. As the sky darkened, we were even joined by an owl that decided to add to the ambiance. I’d never felt closer to Jack then at the moment. Not even our heavy make-out sessions could compare to this feeling. This was beyond the hormones. This was what love was. It was what I’d always wanted.

  It was while I sat listening to the hooting of the owl and bubbling of the spring, that I realized everything would work out how it was supposed to. Jack and I were meant to be. I’d been pretty sure before. But now, I was positive. He was my soulmate. No matter what, or whom we faced, we’d be okay. I had no doubt Michelle had something nasty planned, but we’d survive whatever it was, together.

  When we finally dragged ourselves away from the secret spot, we were a little late for the dinner rush. There weren’t any spots left. Billy was working in the clinic tonight and April was working in the kitchen, which meant there wasn’t anyone to save us a spot.

  “I guess we could steal a spot over there in the corner,” Jack suggested. It wasn’t so much of a spot. It was more of a tiny space of floor that we could crowd into.

  “I have a better idea. Let’s get our meal to go and we can go back to my cabin. April’s working tonight, so we’ll have the place to ourselves,” I suggested. He got this nervous look on his face. It took me a few seconds to realize what he thought I was suggesting. I smacked him on the shoulder. “It’s just dinner. Don’t be so dirty,” I teased. Truthfully, I had kind of thought about it earlier. It was probably the best time for us to take our relationship to the next level. But Jack was still acting nervous, and I didn’t want to push us too fast. Maybe if things go hot and heavy again, like they had in the morning, I might be able to entice him to give into his natural desires.

  We grabbed our food quickly, before April noticed us. I was pretty sure in the large crowd tonight she wouldn’t be able to figure out we weren’t there. And I was hoping that they could keep her busy with the dishes afterwards for a while. The more alone time I had with Jack, the better. I’d been alone with him all day, but that wasn’t enough.

  We rushed back to my cabin as fast as we could, to prevent our food from cooling down too badly. With nobody being in the cabin for most of the day, the fire had gone out and the place was nearly as cold as it was outside. Jack made quick work of building a new fire.

  I sat down on the sofa and enjoyed the view. Jack’s butt looked particularly cute from this angle, just dangling out of the fireplace. I sat there biting my lip as I huddled under a freezing cold blanket, seeking what little warmth I could find. Jack’s fire making skills weren’t as good as mine. It took him quite a while just to get a little flame going. I could have gone over and helped him, but I was enjoying watching him way too much.

  Finally, he got enough of a fire going so that the kindle could do the rest of the work. He sat down beside me with a huff of exhaustion. “Took you long enough,” I teased, as I reached out for my tray of food. It had taken long enough. Our roasted deer was cold. It still tasted wonderful, but it would have tasted better warm. I was hungry enough that I didn’t really care.

  Jack shook his head as he brought his own tray onto his lap. “You could have helped.” He tried to look upset, but he wasn’t really that good at faking that. His smile always broke through despite all his efforts.

  “And miss the view of your sexy butt sticking out of the fireplace…I think not.” I took a bite of cold mashed potato. At least it had a lot of butter. Jack blushed as he swallowed a piece of deer. I realized it was probably the first time I’d admitted to finding certain parts of him sexy. Well, I found every part sexy...some certainly more than others. I think I caught him off guard. He recovered quickly though, changing the subject after a few minutes of awkward silent chewing. I wasn’t feeling too awkward. I was enjoying staring at him, as he tried to recover.

  It didn’t take too long for the room to slowly warm up. Jack decided to change the subject to safer things, the moment he’d recovered himself. It was really kind of annoying. When we were outside making out, he had no problem complementing me or kissing me. But inside my cabin here, it was like he completely shut down. It was almost like he was purposefully attempting to eat as slow as possible, to avoid making out with me. Earlier that had been all he wanted. I’d finished my meal quickly and was now just watching him eat, which was boring and very frustrating.

  The longer I sat there. The stronger the desire grew and all thoughts of taking it slow flew out the window. I decided to give up on being tactful. “So, do you want to have sex or not?” He nearly choked on his food. I quickly handed him a glass of water to clear his throat. “Sorry, that came out way blunter than I meant it to be. But I’m kind of getting this hot and cold vibe from you, and I really don’t know how to take it any other way but personal.” Man did I ever sound like April. I kind of liked it. There was a little fun to be had by just saying what came to your mind.

  He put his tray down. He still had several bites left, but I was pretty sure he was done eating now. His cheeks were the brightest shade of red I’d seen so far. “I thought with the run in with Michelle earlier, you wouldn’t even be thinking about that sort of thing.”

  “Oh, I’m not going to let her control what I do and don’t do. This is about us. Have you thought about it? Having sex with me, that is.” He laughed. “What?”

  “You’ve never sounded more like April before. It’s a little weird…but exciting at the same time. Not that I find your sister exciting. I just meant… I’m rambling again aren’t I.” I laughed. “The answer to your question is, yes I have thought about it. A lot. How could I not? You’re so beautiful.” He reached out and gently caressed my face. Now it was my cheeks that were on fire, and it wasn’t from embarrassment. This heat reached deep inside me, sending a stirring throughout my body.

  “Then why haven’t you made your move?”

>   He moved his hand slowly down my neck, my arm, until he reached my hand. His fingers intertwined with mine. “Because I love you and I wouldn’t want to do anything you weren’t ready for, and I wasn’t sure you were ready.”

  I pulled my hand out of his, reaching into the pocket of my jeans and pulled out the silver condom I’d been holding onto. “I’m ready. Have been for awhile now.”

  He took the condom from my hand. “How long have you had this in your pocket?”

  “A week,” I said biting my lip. That was all the answer he needed. He leaned into me, pressing my head against the arm rest of the sofa. His body weighed down on mine, as his lips moved together with mine, with the same intensity we had earlier. It was a kiss that I knew wouldn’t end with us just saying a casual goodbye. This was finally going to happen, and my body knew it and liked it. I couldn’t help the heavy breathing that escaped my lips as his lips traced down my neck sending shivers running up and down my entire body.

  He pulled away for just a moment, leaving me breathless and longing for the weight of his body on mine. “What about your sister?” He asked. “Won’t she be back soon?”

  I shook my head. “She has clean-up duty tonight. We have at least an hour.” Jack stood up placing his arms beneath my body. With one quick motion he lifted me into the air and while kissing me, he walked over to the bed.

  The desire in me was unlike anything I’d experienced before. Every kiss felt like not enough. I wanted so much more. Just knowing that we were finally going to have more, sent waves of desire traveling through my body. The waves of pleasure, travelled deep to my core, pooling heat between my thighs.

  His hand traveled down the side of my body, stopping briefly to cup my breast. I giggled despite myself. I could feel the smile on his lips, as he softly kissed my neck. His hand moved further down to the hem of my shirt. I could feel his fingers ever so slightly sneaking their way up under my t-shirt. I wanted my shirt off. I wanted everything off. I wanted to get him naked too. He wasn’t moving fast enough for me, so I decided maybe I should take charge.