You’re the Reason

by J. Nathan

  “I just gotta grab something upstairs,” Chase said as we hit the main floor.

  “I’ll wait.”

  “Nope.” He pulled me up the stairs with him and led me down the second-floor hallway. There were people partying in their rooms. Chase stopped at his closed door and pulled out his key. I looked across the hall and saw Ryan in a room with a group of guys. A smattering of liquor bottles and prescription bottles filled his dresser. Ryan looked up and we made eye contact, then he gestured to someone to close the door.

  “You did this on purpose,” I said to Chase as Ryan’s door slammed.

  “What?” Chase asked as he unlocked his door and pushed it open.

  “You brought me up here so Ryan could see us together.”

  A smile spread across his face as he led me into his room.

  “That was mean.”

  He closed the door behind us. “I did you a favor. Now you don’t have to have the awkward it’s-not-you-it’s-me talk.”

  “I already had that talk.”

  His brows shot up. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. So, next time you’re thinking about doing something crappy, don’t. Ryan’s always been nice to me. And, I’m not someone to rub something in someone else’s face.”

  “Sorry,” he said, and I hoped he understood where I was coming from.

  I looked around his room as he grabbed some clothes from his drawer and stuffed them into his backpack. His bed was neatly made, no clothes lay anywhere in the room, and he had one picture on his nightstand. I picked it up, hoping it wasn’t a photo of him and Chantel. Relief washed over me when I found it was a picture of him standing between an older man and woman. “Are these your parents?”

  He glanced to the picture and nodded.

  “No siblings?”

  He shook his head. “Nope. Just me.”

  “Were you that much of a handful?”

  A slow smile spread across his lips. “Depends who you ask. My mom would say I can do no wrong.”

  “She clearly doesn’t know you.”

  He laughed.

  I examined the photo. “You look like your mom.”

  “I’ll be sure to tell her you said that. Everyone says I look like my dad.”

  He and his dad had the same icy blue eyes. But the rest of his features, including those faint dimples, belonged to his mom. “It’s a nice picture.”

  “Yeah? I’m gonna have to replace it with a picture of you and me.”

  I rolled my eyes. “If whatever this is even lasts past the weekend.”

  “Come again?” he said, more of a threat than a question.

  “Well, you do tend to piss me off whenever you open your mouth.”

  “Oh, I don’t plan on doing a whole lot of talking tonight,” he said with a smirk on his lips.

  I swallowed down my sudden nerves. I hadn’t held onto my virginity this long to give it up to a guy who just kind of broke up with my roommate who wasn’t really his girlfriend. I thought we’d get to know each other before sex was even on the table.

  Was I naïve to have thought that?

  “Stop stressing, Soph. I know. And I’m not about to force myself on you tonight. I was joking.”

  I released a silent breath.

  He threw his backpack onto his back and reached for my hand again. As we made our way downstairs and out the front door, I prayed I wasn’t making a huge mistake.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  I expected Chase to walk to the parking lot behind the frat house to grab his SUV, but he led me down the front sidewalk. “You don’t mind walking, do you?”

  I shook my head as we headed toward my dorm, the music from the frat house fading into the darkness. Crickets chirped and the light of the partial moon accompanied us as we walked in comfortable silence, alone and free to do as we pleased.

  “If you didn’t show up at the party,” Chase said, “I was gonna show up at your dorm.”

  “You could’ve just sent an Uber,” I deadpanned.

  Laughter burst out of him, and the sweet sound brought on my own laughter.

  He squeezed my hand. “I’m glad you came.” He tugged me in a different direction than my dorm. “I wanna show you something.” He led me toward the quad. The area was deserted and peaceful late at night—such a contrast to a busy school day when students crisscrossed in every different direction.

  Chase moved us toward one of the old cobblestone buildings surrounding the quad. An old plaque on the front of the building read: Established in 1885. We walked around to the side of the two-story building. An old metal ladder ran from the top of the building to just even with the first-floor window. “Here.” Chase stepped behind me, grasping my hips. “Reach up and climb to the top.”

  I looked back at him, confused. “What?”

  “Just reach up and I’m gonna lift you.”

  “Ummm…”

  “Oh, damn. Can you not climb with your knee?”

  “My knee’s fine. But, are you coming, too?”

  He laughed. “No, I’m gonna leave you up there all alone.”

  I reached for the first bar on the ladder as Chase lifted me off my feet. I grasped hold of it and pulled myself up to the second rung, climbing the rest of the way like a girl not used to climbing ladders. When I finally reached the top, I threw my leg over the turret-type ledge less gracefully than I wished and climbed to the flat surface of the roof. Though only two stories high, my legs shook beneath me as I looked down at the pavement below.

  The thought of Sydney Lane jumping from four flights was astounding—not to mention heartbreaking.

  I watched Chase stealthily climb the ladder, making it look so easy. He soon stood beside me. The darkness concealed us on top of the roof as we took in the view. The campus from that vantage point took my breath away. The old buildings were all dimly lit by a small light out front. The security lights in the corners of the quad cast a dim blue light on the sidewalk beneath them. The magnolia trees, though cloaked by night, created their very own wall of shadows all about.

  Chase moved behind me, his chest pressing to my back as his arms slipped around me. He locked his hands on my stomach and rested his chin on my shoulder. “Isn’t it beautiful from up here?”

  I nodded. “Is this your spot?”

  “My spot?”

  “Yeah, where you take all the girls?”

  He chuckled, the vibration moving against my back. “Every last one of them.”

  “No, seriously? How’d you know about it?”

  “The Kappa Sigmas bring their pledges up here.”

  “For what?”

  “If I told you, I’d be breaking a century-old frat secret.”

  “You’re joking.”

  He chuckled. “I’m not. But I will tell you. They make pledges stand on the ledge of the roof and repeat the frat’s motto.”

  “Wow. Such a big secret,” I teased.

  “Naked,” he added.

  I snorted. “Did you have to do that at your old fraternity?”

  “I’ll deny it if anyone asks.”

  “So, that’s a yes?”

  He shrugged. “I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of.”

  I wondered if that was his way of apologizing for all the things he’d done to hurt me.

  He lifted his hands to my arms, moving them up and down my skin. “Jesus. You’re shaking.” He slipped his hand into mine. “Come on. I just wanted to show you the best view on campus. But it’s getting cold.”

  “Thanks for taking me up here. It really is a beautiful view.”

  “We can come back when it’s warmer,” he said.

  I nodded, liking the idea that he was planning a future event for us. Like it was his way of saying this wasn’t only about tonight.

  “It’s even better at sunset.”

  “So, you do come up here a lot.”

  “Yeah, I come up here a lot. But alone. When I need a break from the frat.”

  Something about the way he stressed
alone provided me with more reassurances of who Chase Reed really was.

  He moved us back to the ledge by the ladder, and I watched as he climbed down first. Once he disappeared at the bottom, I shakily threw my leg over and climbed down, one careful step at a time—not looking beneath me. At the bottom, I considered kissing the ground, never so happy to be on solid ground before in my life. Maybe skydiving just wasn’t in the cards for me. I guess time would tell.

  Chase and I got to my room a little while later. I flicked on the light, relieved Chantel hadn’t decided to cut her pledge bonding weekend short. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what would’ve happened if she had returned early.

  Chase sat down on my bed. “You gonna kick me off your bed this time?”

  I crossed my arms and tilted my head, liking the look of him on my bed a hundred times more than I had that first time I found him on it. What a difference a little time made. “Depends.”

  He smirked. “On what?”

  “Do you plan on pissing me off?”

  He pushed himself to his feet and stalked toward me, cupping my cheeks between his hands. I quivered under his touch as he lowered his forehead to mine. “I told you I don’t plan on doing a lot of talking.” His mouth lowered to mine, his lips capturing mine in a delicious tangle of tongues. His hands slipped down my shoulders and over my arms before circling my hips and drifting to my ass. Without breaking our kiss, he lifted me right off my feet.

  I hooked my arms around his neck and tightened my legs around his hips.

  He turned and walked us to my bed. He lowered me down, following me and settling between my legs. I felt his kiss everywhere—hell, I felt him everywhere. Especially, between my legs. I deepened the kiss, arching into him as my hands skated down his muscular back. I wanted to be closer. I wanted the kiss to be deeper.

  Chase finally pulled away, coming back up for air and leaving us both breathless. He studied my lips as our chests heaved liked we’d run a race. “You’ve clearly been kissed before. Why haven’t you had sex?”

  “Why have you?”

  He laughed as his eyes lifted to mine. “Because it feels good.”

  My cheeks pulsed with heat. Why hadn’t I anticipated that response? “Well…I’m waiting for the guy who’ll make me feel good.”

  “I’m right here.”

  His words snagged my breath away—or maybe it was the honest way he said them. Because, I knew he meant what he said. And that scared the living hell out of me.

  He inched closer to me and our lips met again. The kiss started out slow and meaningful, but something inside me took over, and I needed to be closer to him. Our tongues and teeth fought for control as my hips sought friction. Understanding what I needed, Chase shifted his hips and his erection pressed between my legs. The pressure of his cock and the fabric of my jeans rubbing against my clit was too much.

  A raspy groan escaped me, making Chase roll his hips as he kissed me. I may have been a virgin, but it didn’t mean I’d never fooled around with a guy before and enjoyed it.

  Eventually, Chase pulled back, his eyes riveting between mine. “Will you let me look at you tonight?”

  My chest tightened, and a knot swelled in my throat, making it difficult to swallow. “Look at me?”

  “I can’t get the sight of you on the beach out of my mind.”

  I stifled a smile, loving that my plan to drive him wild had succeeded. I hadn’t been able to get the sight of him on the beach out of my own mind either.

  He sat back and reached for the top of my jeans. He raised his brows in question.

  I nodded as my heartbeat accelerated.

  Chase focused carefully as he slipped the button through the slot. He slowly pulled down the zipper, watching each tooth come apart. He grabbed hold of the hem of my jeans and looked to me for consent. I lifted my ass and he pulled the jeans down my legs and off my feet. He drank me in, his eyes sweeping slowly up my legs to my lacy pink panties.

  I couldn’t read the look in his eyes. Did he like what he saw or was he turned off that I didn’t wear something skimpier like Chantel did?

  Instead of driving myself crazy with what he may be thinking, I pushed myself up on my elbows and peeled my shirt over my head, tossing it to the floor.

  Chase’s eyes widened, taking in my matching pink pushup bra that gave me way more cleavage than I actually had. He swallowed hard. “Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?”

  Tingles rushed up my arms, the hunger in his eyes and his words setting my body on fire.

  He tried to lean forward to lay me back down, but I reached out and pressed my palm to his chest, stopping him. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “Your shirt’s still on,” I said.

  His lips lifted into a sexy smirk. He reached behind his head and pulled it off, dropping it to the floor next to mine.

  My fingertips skated across the front of his shoulders, so smooth and defined. He watched my hands as they explored his body, following them with his eyes as they ventured slowly down his chest. My thumbs flicked over his nipples before circling them. Chase’s eyes drifted shut, reveling in the feel of my touch. My hands descended over his abs, tracing every deep ridge with the gentle touch of my fingertips. Holy hell he was so hot.

  When he couldn’t take anymore, he opened his eyes and lowered himself on top of me. “You gonna let me kiss you, Soph?”

  “Since when do you ask?”

  He leaned down, bringing his mouth to my ear. “Since I wasn’t talking about your lips.”

  I sucked in a sharp breath before I nodded, eager for what came next.

  He inched his way down my body, slowly tunneling his lips between my breasts.

  My heart was pounding so fast, I was fairly certain he could feel it ready to burst through my chest.

  He continued down, pressing soft kisses to my bare stomach. When he reached the elastic of my panties, his mouth hovered over me—keeping it a mere breath away from the lacy material. I inhaled sharply, holding in my breath as I waited for his lips to touch me, but only his warm breath moved over me.

  I’d never wanted a guy’s mouth between my thighs more than I did his in that moment.

  But he didn’t stop there.

  I released my breath, feeling a little let down, until he whispered soft kisses down the inside of my left thigh. My body hummed to life, yearning for him there. Yearning for him everywhere. I struggled to decipher up from down when he was treating my body as carefully as he was, making sure not to miss an inch.

  He reached my left foot, then moved to my right, dropping kisses all the way up from my ankle to my knee. He paused. I didn’t need to peek. I knew what he was looking at. He lowered his lips to the small scars on my knee and peppered them with gentle kisses. I hated those ugly scars and what pain they’d caused me. But he was treating them with such care. It was as if, in that moment, he was helping me to let go of the painful reminder of my injury. Chase abandoned my scars and worked his way up the inside of my right leg. Once he reached the sensitive skin of my inner thigh, I pulled in another sharp breath, impatiently awaiting his next move.

  His mouth hovered between my legs. “Has anyone ever kissed you here?”

  “No,” I breathed, unable to form any other coherent words.

  “I promise you, it will feel good when I do.”

  “Do it,” I urged.

  He chuckled. “Not tonight.”

  I sighed, feeling my entire body deflate.

  “Soon,” he said as he trailed open-mouthed kisses across my stomach, licking a path around my navel. He worked his way up, tunneling his nose and lips between my breasts. “How about here?” He pressed kisses along the satin of my bra, gently licking under the seam of the cup. “Has anyone kissed you here?”

  I nodded.

  “Not like I will,” he said.

  A ripple rolled through my stomach. Was he trying to drive me wild so I willingly gave up my V card here and now? But if that were the case, why had he
turned me down?

  He brushed light kisses along my collarbone before reaching my mouth. But instead of kissing me, his lips lingered over mine, taunting me with their proximity. “When you’re ready, I’ll be read—”

  I lifted my head and stole the words from his lips. My tongue pushed inside his mouth as I fought to gain the control he’d had. He deepened the kiss, tunneling his hands through my hair as he took over, setting the pace. His body began to move over me. His hips rolled again, his erection pressing once again between my legs, this time harder. The thin material left little barrier, and the sensations intensified. I wrapped my hands around him, my fingertips trailing up his back. It would be so easy to remove my panties and just let him show me how good it could feel. But at the same time, everything about us had been so screwed up. Who knew how he’d be acting tomorrow.

  He finally pulled back, as both of us fought for air. “We’ve got time,” he assured me.

  I nodded, knowing he was right, but still reeling from everything he’d done to my body. Now I knew what it felt like for the guys I’d put the brakes on.

  Chase rolled me onto my side so we lay chest to chest, facing each other. “We don’t need to rush anything,” he continued to assure me. He reached up and traced the outline of my lips.

  I shuddered as the tip of his finger drifted from my lips to my left cheek and over my nose to my right cheek. “I love these freckles.”

  “Oh yeah?” I said, all breathless and still reeling.

  He nodded. “You can’t see them unless you’re up close. Like they’re a secret you only share with some people.”

  I closed my eyes, taking it all in. He was the guy in the media room. He was the guy who took me to the coast in a convertible. He was the guy I wanted to spend time with when he was acting like this.

  “Will you tell me something?” he asked.

  I opened my eyes only to be swept up in his pretty blue ones staring back at me. “What?”

  “Do you ever plan to play soccer again?”

  “Next question.”

  He hesitated, probably deciding if he should press me or not. “What else is in your jar?”

  I smiled. “Lots of things.”

  “Give me a few.”