Chapter 11
The Literary Ball
The literary ball was an annual Lappell tradition. It started as an over the top costume ball back in the twenties, which in time, slowly changed into a modern day party where the ‘dress up requirement’ was replaced by wearing embellished necklaces and name badges. Guests would write down a famous person from literature on pieces of jewelry and wear it for the evening for discussion. The necklaces for the ladies looked like a tiny script, made out of chalkboard, and were about five inches long and a few inches wide. The chalkboard was outlined with very beautiful gold filigree and attached to a small gold necklace. The men wore the same miniature gold chalkboards but as a badge pinned to their tuxedo pocket.
For the night, I selected a long Alexander McQueen embroidered silk-faille and organza gown, that cascaded down my legs. It was strapless and fitted in the bodice. I also held a statement black and gun metal colored, Alexander McQueen clutch to go with it. The little gold filigree necklace was quite complementary to the dress and against the light olive tone of my skin. I also wore my hair in long flowing spirals down my back.
The Weston’s gardens had been given extra lighting for the ball, which created a total illuminated feeling of twilight as we walked amongst the trees and the garden beds. The luminous foliage was complemented by the stunning array of dresses and tuxedos of the guests who strolled, chatted, ate and drank along the stone walkways. Countless waiters and waitresses, wearing white pants and button-up long-sleeved shirts, carried trays of exquisite hors d’ouvres and wine flutes with deliciously expensive champagne. I felt like I was in a wonderland, and I wore a giddy grin from the whole sense of euphoria I couldn't hide on my face.
As we wandered through the groups of people, Clint introduced me to more of his friends, which appeared to be more faces I had not seen or met from the other parties. They were all pleasant and polite and smiled warmly at me as I held Clint's arm. As we circulated, I noticed Wickburn talking to a gentleman with a very familiar black hair cut, whose back was facing us. As I tried to place the back of the person’s head, Clint took my hand, walking towards them saying, “Let’s go say hello to Arthur.”
I internally frowned. Talking to Arthur would only remind me of the Lapell's offer and how it almost ruined my relationship with Clint, which is exactly what I did not want to think about right now. I braced myself by ensuring I had on my best artificial smile. When we neared Wickburn, my heart sank even further and did a double flip into the sea of awkward, as the realization of whose head I was trying to identify became very clear.
For fuck's sake, not again!
“What on earth are you doing here?” I was completely shocked to see Samuel conversing with Wickburn. He looked slick in his fitted tuxedo and combed back hair that was as dark as his almost black eyes. I started to remember the way I use to run my hands through that hair. No, Norah, don't.
Clint was squeezing my hand tighter than he probably realized. “Arthur is a friend of the family, and he convinced me to come tonight before I took off.”
Arthur eyed Samuel as he provided the explanation, “You know Miss Ross here Samuel?” Wickburn questioned, watching the tension ignite.
Samuel smirked towards Wickburn. “I know, Miss Ross, very well.” And then turned back to me, “I also figured you’d come with him, and I came so I could see you tonight.” Samuel used his head to point to Clint.
“‘Him’ has a name and his name is Clint.”
Clint smiled at me.
“Of course, Clint Weston, I’m told this is your family’s estate.”
Clint released the tightness of his grip on my hand. “It is,” he said flatly, and Samuel’s gaze returned to me.
“How, nice.” I could hear the sarcasm in his voice. Samuel despised the rich as much as I used to. He walked forward to me, his hands going straight for my chest.
“What are you doing?” Clint asked immediately, as Samuel’s hand touched my skin.
“Relax, I just want to see what name she has written down.” Samuel’s eyes watched mine and then returned to the necklace. His fingers lingered on my skin as he read the name I had written on the tiny board, his eyes squinting a bit, and then a huge grin spread across his face – “Juliet Capulet,” – and his eyes shifted back up to mine, “were you thinking of me when you picked that name?” He seemed very pleased.
Clint brushed his hand away from my body. “What is he talking about Norah?”
My eyes shifted into a fierce look directed at Samuel. “Nothing Clint, nothing at all.” I honestly wasn’t sure why I selected the name in the first place. Perhaps I was subconsciously thinking of Samuel.
Shifting the discussion, I reached over to Samuel’s badge and read his name out loud, “Jay Gatsby.”
Clint laughed harshly, “Now there’s a tragic character.”
Samuel grinned again and moved to stand closer to me. “Well Clint, some people,” and he moved his wine glass in my direction, “think flawed characters are the best kind, right Norah?” Samuel was making a point of how well he knew me and how little Clint did not.
I turned to Clint again; “No one’s supposed to be perfect, I think there is real beauty in flaws. To me, Gatsby was a tragic hero, a romantic dreamer. I think that's beautiful.” I swallowed in my explanation and gave Samuel another dirty look.
Samuel leaned towards Clint and looked to his badge, “Fitzwilliam Darcy,” then looked to me again, “interesting choice Clint, that probably means you’ll need to find yourself an Elizabeth Bennett.”
Clint edged towards me and grabbed my arm to pull me closer, “I’m doing just fine with that.”
Samuel smirked yet again, “You sure about that Clint?”
What was Samuel doing? This is crazy.
“Norah, there is someone over there I want you to meet,” Clint used his hand to point towards the stairs of the mansion. I knew immediately from his voice that he was lying, but I couldn’t bear to continue this conversation with Samuel anymore. I was almost certain it would come to fisticuffs between them.
I nodded, “Oh yes, please excuse us. Arthur. Samuel.”
Clint led me off.
Near the stairs of the house, Clint finally stopped walking. He seemed really angry but softened when he turned me into him and held me close. “I don’t like him Norah. I don’t like how well he knows you and I don’t like how he keeps turning up. I’m finding it hard to restrain myself, and I’m not normally a violent person.”
I did appreciate that he was so open with how he was feeling at that very moment. “Clint, the reason he knows me so well is because we talked a lot during our relationship.” I could feel Clint relaxing. “I gave you my body remember, and soon with time, you will know me just as well as he does.”
He started to kiss my neck, “I know, I know, but knowing you wanted to marry him, it makes my head so crazy with jealousy, I can’t see straight, and you still haven’t told me how you feel about us, about me.” He was asking me again to tell him what he had already told me.
“Clint I’m your girlfriend, I care about you deeply. I’ve given my body to you in many different ways, you should already know how I feel without me having to say it,” and that was the best I could do.
Clint looked satisfied and then his eyes drifted down to my necklace. “What did he mean when he said you must have been thinking of him when you chose this name?”
That was another story I was not ready to get into. “He was just stirring you to get under your skin, and it looks like it worked.” Clint looked like he wasn’t sure if I was telling him the truth but didn’t keep pursuing any further. As we were about to continue walking, Clint paused and my eyes instantly rolled.
Damn it, the questions were not going to end.
“Norah, when you were with Samuel, did you tell him you loved him?” and I felt a surge of guilt.
I couldn’t hide my face so I admitted, “Yes. But he knew me, and I knew him. I thought we would always be togeth
er.”
Clint gathered me up again in his arms. “Is that why you can’t say it? Because of all those times I ran away? Have I scared you into thinking this is temporary?”
I turned away from him. “That is part of it Clint, but it’s more about what you need to know about me that makes me think you might run away for good.”
He pulled my whole body up against his. “Nothing you can say will change how I feel about you.”
I believed he was telling me the truth but still couldn’t anticipate his reaction when he finally found out my secret. I hugged him tighter and hoped he wouldn't press me anymore for information that evening.
We rejoined Clint’s friends, danced and sipped champagne. I saw Josh, who stood at distance from me the whole evening. He still managed to give me one of his best smiles, even from afar, but I was a little disappointed we missed running each into other as the evening wore on.
It was close to 2am when Clint and I decided to leave and go back to my apartment. I had not seen Samuel since our conversation earlier in the evening, which I could admit, was a relief, but my mind still wondered where he had disappeared to.
I went inside the mansion to fetch my clutch which was in a coat room next to the study. As I neared the coat room; an arm pulled me reeling off into the side and through another door. I was standing back in the study. My mind flashed images of Josh in between the legs of Stephania on the grand desk, but now it was Samuel who was standing before me. The look on his face was one I knew all too well. He was looking for love, and was going to get me to face my feelings, whether I wanted to or not.
“Seriously Samuel, you can’t keep showing up like this. Your life,” and he lifted a finger to my lips to silence me. I melted a little, still not resistant to the love we once shared. I had no ill feelings towards him because there were none. We were not allowed to be together, plain and simple. He was never hurtful or aggressive and never once pressured me to do anything I didn’t want to do. He loved me wholeheartedly and had proved it in every kind of way. I had to turn away from him in the end because it meant his survival.
“Did you like the flowers?”
I felt myself tremble as he asked. “Yes, they were beautiful, but you already knew I would like them and what they would remind me of.”
He began to run his finger along my chin and up to my ear until he was playing with the tendrils of my hair.
“You can’t tell me that after six months you have just stopped loving me. I don’t believe that for a second. I know you; I know how hard you love. It doesn’t just go away.” My heart was beating like crazy and I felt incredibly nervous being alone in a room with him. I had not been alone with him since the day we had been separated and was not sure how I would feel or act around him.
“I had to move on Samuel. I didn’t think I would ever see you again.”
He rested his hands on my shoulders, “And now that I’m here?”
I gazed down at the floor. “I’m scared for you, I can’t even imagine what will happen if he finds out you are here.”
“Do you want me to tell him,” and both our heads spun around to see Josh who was lingering in the doorway of the study. My heart sank to the ground and Samuel took a big step back from me. How long had Josh been standing there? Josh walked over to me and stood next to me like a protective brother.
“I don’t know what you think you are doing but you need to leave, and I mean, go back to where you came from,” he directed at Samuel, almost agressively.
“Hmmm, Josh Hollows, I’ve heard a lot about you. You’ve been such a ‘good friend’.” Samuel used his fingers as exclamation marks as he emphasized the words ‘good friends’.
“Samuel stop,” I tried to interrupt, but he continued.
“Oh c’mon Norah, he has always wanted you. I read some of his emails and his letters. You may have ignored the obvious because you refused to see it, but I know he has been waiting for you, and now that you’re here, he must have at least tried to be with you.”
I could not believe this was happening here in Clint’s house. Josh’s silence spoke volumes.
“So what did you do that sent her running off to Weston? You must have done something pretty stupid. Am I right Hollows?” Samuel then pat the wooden desk in a teasing like way, as if he had already been informed about what had transpired in the room. I looked at the desk, then to Josh and then braced myself for the explosion. The tension in the room was palpable. Fuck!
In the flash of a few seconds, I saw Josh’s fists come flying past my face and connect with Samuel’s jaw. I was thrown back onto my knees as the boys went at it, their arms not holding back as they furiously tried to punch and wrestle each other on the ground.
I had never seen Josh fight before. He always came across as a lover and not a fighter. That was his nature as I knew it. Watching in horror as my best friend and ex-fiancé wrestled on the floor of the study, I began to wonder why such a relatively small jab from Samuel had pushed Josh to pounce on him with such fury. Was it really such a sore subject for Josh? I knew he had feelings for me but the way he went at Samuel, suggested it had really hit a nerve. I already knew Samuel could fight and was fully aware he could really hurt Josh if he wanted to. As I watched them struggle, it looked like it was escalating, and I started to worry about how far it would go. My heart pounded in fear for Josh.
The next thing I saw was Clint running into the room, trying to separate the brawling boys. There was more yelling between them until Clint shook both of them in each of his hands. When they stopped fighting and tried to regain their breath, Clint’s eyes then turned to me on the floor. He let go of both of them instantly to help me up.
“Are you OK?” he asked, lifting me up from the floor.
I was trembling. “I’m fine,” was all I managed to get out.
“What happened?” Clint demanded in a frightening voice to both Josh and Samuel. I had not ever seen him so intensely angry.
“I was just encouraging Samuel here, to leave,” Josh got out between breaths. He had a small cut above his eye. I instinctively went over to him to check it out.
Samuel straightened his tux. “I’m leaving, I’m leaving.” He watched me nursing Josh’s injury, stroking his cheek as I did.
“You better watch your girlfriend Clint; I’m not your only competition it seems.”
My head did a double take hearing that. “See you Len,” and Samuel strode out of the room, catching my eye while I was stilling tending to Josh’s cut.
I closed my eyes to pause the drama in my head, and when I opened them, they glanced down to Josh’s badge. I stilled for a second as I read it, trying to avoid Josh’s eyes as he watched me looking at the name. It said, ‘Noah Calhoun’.
I sighed. Josh.
Clint refused to look at me as we drove back to my apartment. The night had been a rollercoaster of emotions and I knew Clint had a million and one questions about me now. He parked in a visitor’s bay in the basement but before we could exit the car, he automatically locked the doors.
“Why did he call you Len?” he looked at me directly. I squirmed in my seat but remained silent. “Norah, why did he call you Len?” He wasn’t asking, he was commanding an answer and this time his voice made me jump in my seat. I sighed heavily. I had to let Clint in if I wanted to move forward. I had hidden myself from him long enough and if I didn’t tell him who I was, I risked losing him for good.
I unbuckled my seatbelt and climbed over to him in the driver’s seat. I straddled him so I could look him directly in the eyes.
“I need you to know that the only reason I didn’t tell you was because it’s not information I can tell just anyone. It’s the reason I moved here. It’s the reason I didn’t get married. It’s the reason I have yet to tell you how I feel about you. And if you do run away, I want you to know that," I took a deep breath, "Clint Weston, I love you. With every inch of my being and soul. You make me feel alive in every way that I need.” He watched me intently, smilin
g with his eyes.“I gave up on Samuel and I moved on from him more easily than I thought I could have. I don’t really know if the love we shared was the forever kind, but with you Clint, I wouldn’t just give up after six months.” His arms were around me, hugging me tightly.
He looked so surprised I was being so open with my emotions that he kissed my forehead. “You have made me so happy, I can’t even begin to describe to you how much I love you right now Norah Ross.”
I swallowed again, “And that 's the other thing Clint. Look, I melt every time you say that to me, you have no idea, but Clint, you need to know who I really am if you are going to say those kinds of words.” I paused, “My full name is, Lenorah Simona Rossi. I’m the daughter of Giuseppe Palmiro Rossi of New York. You may have heard of him as Big Jo New York.” Clint was trying to place the name so I helped him further, “He’s one of New York’s biggest crime bosses.” Clint’s eyes widened as he recognized who I was talking about.
And there’s the look of complete horror.
Chapter 12
Exposed
I couldn’t read the current expression on Clint’s face. It had changed from horrified, to confused, to pensive.
“Say something,” I finally said. I was impatient for Clint’s explosive reaction, which didn’t come. He was just silent and it stretched on and on until I couldn’t bare it anymore. “Do you want to leave?” I asked, expecting nothing less.
Clint seemed to snap out of his lost state of mind. “I… I am just so happy you told me you love me, and you trust me enough to tell me who you are.” He held onto me tightly. I expected him to be angry about how I withheld my identity but he wasn’t. I expected him to say it was too much baggage and run in the opposite direction, but he seemed relieved. The bombshell-like lie I had just exposed about myself, barely registered any flames of destruction.
Pieces of Lies Page 14