“I’m afraid he is.”
She sounds certain and her unwavering assertions somehow scare me even more.
“Will I have to leave in a police car?”
“An unmarked one, yes. Is that alright with you?”
“Aren’t… aren’t you going to arrest me?”
“What makes you say that?”
“You arrested Cole.” I tell her. “I heard it all.”
“We arrested Cole because he’s a wanted man and we already had a warrant out for his arrest. This doesn’t apply for you, Serena. You’re the one who called us and as far as I’m aware, you haven’t broken any laws.”
If only she knew… my subconscious taunts me once again.
“Ok, let’s go.”
She opens the door for me to exit and we walk down the corridor together. I was expecting to be escorted by uniformed police officers but it’s just the two of us and she’s wearing a trouser suit.
The fact that she’s not in uniform puts me at ease and I somehow manage to convince myself that I’m not really leaving the hotel with a detective or whatever the hell she is. I can pretend she’s just a normal person and that this sort of thing happens all the time.
We make our way down to the reception but leave through the back door instead of the main one. There was no one in reception due to the fact that it’s still so early and I’m thankful I was spared the humiliation of being observed as we left.
“That’s my car right there.” She says, pointing across the car park.
I follow her and take one last look at the hotel behind us. I know we only spent a short time here but we created memories which will last me a lifetime and I’ll always be grateful for that.
The car ride to the station seems to go on forever, especially because the two of us remain silent throughout the journey. I’m escorted through reception as soon as we arrive and into a small room with a single desk in the centre of it and a tape recorder.
I come to a standstill, overwhelmed and discouraged by the formal layout in front of me.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of, Serena.” Natalie assures me. “You’re not in any trouble.”
“But Cole is.” I mumble, lowering my gaze to the floor.
“I’m afraid so.” She replies sombrely. “Now come and take a seat.”
I do as she asks and take a seat on one of the chairs in front of me. She does the same and reads through all the legal requirements which have already taken place for us to have this conversation.
“Where is he?”
“He’s been remanded in custody for now.”
“So he’s here?” I ask. “He’s inside this building?”
“Yes, I believe he’s in one of the cells.”
“He shouldn’t be in there, he really shouldn’t!” I exclaim loudly, leaning forward in my seat.
“Why shouldn’t he, Serena? Cole is considered to be a dangerous criminal as far as the police are concerned. He’s wanted for GBH, assault, battery and threatening behaviour as well as theft and avoiding an arrest.”
“My God.” I whisper, allowing the information she’s just told me to sink in.
“What made you decide to call us this morning?” She enquires gently.
“I just knew it was the right thing to do.” I confess, raking my fingers through my hair.
There’s a moment of silence between us before she asks her next question, startling me completely.
“I need to know if he’s hurt you, Serena.”
“No! He hasn’t. He hasn’t hurt me and he never would do something like that.”
“So why did you leave with him?” She perseveres with caution. “What was it that made you abscond with a man you knew was wanted by the police?”
“It… it felt like it was our only option.”
“But why?”
“Because… because he was in trouble and he had to go.”
“But why did you go with him?” She persists, relentless in her interrogation. “Is it… is it because the two of you are together?”
She observes my reaction, awaiting my response with a tremendous amount of patience.
“We were but I doubt we are anymore.” I tell her, wringing my hands together in anguish and distress.
“And what makes you say that?” She probes carefully.
“Because I betrayed him. I phoned the police and now he’s going to go prison because of it.”
“You did not betray him.” She replies firmly. “You did the right thing and Cole will come to realise that one day.”
“I don’t think so. You don’t know the way he thinks.”
“Why don’t you try and explain it to me?”
“It’s pointless.” I sigh wearily, cradling my head in my hands. “It’s not like we can ever be together anyway.”
“Well, you certainly can’t while he’s serving his custodial sentence but who knows what the future holds? You might be able to work it out one day.”
I stare across at her in amazement, utterly astonished by her last statement.
“You… you don’t know, do you?” I whisper, trembling violently.
“What don’t I know?”
“Nothing, forget I said anything.” I retort sharply, wishing I’d kept my mouth shut in the first place.
“Serena, you do know that it’s an offence to withhold information, don’t you?”
“Please.” I beg her. “Please don’t make me say it.”
“Say what?” She enquires softly.
“I really thought you knew. I thought Lisa must have told you.”
“Lisa?”
“My best friend.” I inform her, avoiding her gaze by staring out the window to my left.
It looks out onto an empty car park and I can’t help but notice how the desolate landscape resembles my own isolation and misery.
“Told us what?”
“That Cole and I are related.”
She inhales sharply, narrowing her eyes at me in disbelief.
“Related?”
“We’re… we’re half-brother and sister.” I disclose unhappily. “We share the same father and we’ve only just found out.”
“I see.” She responds uncertainly. “Is this why the two of you decided to run away together? Did you think it was the only way you could have the type of relationship you really want?”
“It’s not like we thought any of it through. We just left.”
“Serena, I need to ask you another personal question.” She warns me. “I need to know if you’ve been involved in a sexual relationship with Cole.”
“You mean ever?” I blurt out foolishly.
“Since you’ve found out that you share the same father.”
I soon realise that I have two choices. I can choose to tell the truth and risk Cole being charged with something far worse than he already has been or I can lie and try to protect him.
“No.” I answer, making sure I sound confident. “We haven’t done anything sexual since we found out.”
“Are you quite sure about that?”
“I’m absolutely certain.” I lie, making sure my facial expression stays the same.
“Ok, that’s good. I really don’t want to have to charge you as well as Cole.”
“You’re going to charge him for something that didn’t even happen?” I say incredulously, feeling the panic rising up inside of me once more.
“I would be forced to charge you both if I had any evidence that either one of you has engaged in sexual contact with the other since you discovered you’re blood related but the hotel has also clarified that you made a point of asking for separate bedrooms throughout your stay.”
I thank God for the interfering receptionist who gave us no choice about a second hotel room and stay quiet, grateful that the proof of this might work in our favour.
“We both knew that staying in separate rooms was the right thing to do.”
“Serena, let’s go back to the question I asked you earlier. Why did yo
u run away with him? Why would you leave when you knew how much trouble you would both be in if you got caught?”
“I loved him.” I admit, meeting her gaze for the first time since sitting at her desk. “A part of me still does and that’s why I called you this morning. I couldn’t let him do it to himself and I was terrified about what was going to happen next. At least this way Cole will be free to live the life he wants to. I knew there would be no future for either of us on the run.”
“You’re a sensible girl. I just wish you had been a bit more level-headed before you left town with him.” She reprimands me sternly. “Look, I’m going to be honest with you when I say this, Serena. Cole is in a lot of trouble and it might be some time before you get to see him again. You might even be called to testify at his trial.”
“His trial? What trial?” I demand harshly, staring at her in horror.
“As of this moment, Cole is still pleading not guilty to the numerous charges we’ve made against him and unless he changes his mind anytime soon… he’s going to end up in prison for a very long time.”
I can’t even speak. No words are strong enough to describe what I am feeling or the guilt that consumes me.
“C-can I see him?” I ask, faltering slightly. “Please. This might be the last chance I have to see him and I need to explain things.”
She exhales slowly, pausing for a moment before answering my question.
“Your request wouldn’t be allowed under normal circumstances but it’s clear to see how much this means to you. I can probably get you ten minutes with him and that’s all I can do.” She says brusquely, standing up suddenly.
“Thank you. Thank you so much.”
“Come with me.”
She ushers me out of the small room we were in and out into the corridor. She locks the door behind her before we head back to reception where she can make a phone call. Natalie is only on the phone for a few seconds before she ends the call and turns to face me.
“Can I see him?” I ask, struggling to conceal my desperation.
“Yes.” She responds curtly. “Follow me.”
I follow her once more as she leads me down a confusing array of corridors and detours. She comes to an abrupt standstill outside a closed door and turns to face me.
“Is he in there?”
“Yes but he’s behind glass. You’ll be able to converse with him as soon as the green light comes on the panel which is in front of you at the desk.”
I stare at her blankly, wondering what on earth she is talking about.
“A green light?”
“Neither one of you will be able to hear the other person speak unless that green switch is activated. Do you understand?”
“I think so.” I whisper, clenching my fists.
“I’ll be right outside this door.” She reminds me. “And don’t forget that we can see and hear everything, Serena. There’s nothing you can exchange with him or hide from us.”
“I understand.”
“Good. Now go on through.”
She opens the door for me and I take a hesitant step inside. The room is extremely dark until I enter and then a powerful light turns on, brightening up the dark corners and daunting shadows. I hear the soft click of the door as it is closed behind me and that’s when I see him.
A silhouette of a man is all I can make out at first. He’s cradling his head in his hands as he leans against the desk he’s sitting in front of. I watch him as I slowly close the distance between us, nearing the glass wall which keeps us apart.
The green switch which Natalie warned me about appears, letting me know that Cole can now hear me if I choose to speak to him. It takes me a few moments but I eventually find the courage to reveal my presence to him.
“Hi.”
It’s a ridiculous thing to say but it was enough to startle him. He lifts his head and gasps when his gaze meets mine. Utter disbelief is an understatement when it comes to describing his expression and I can’t help but notice his bloodshot eyes and how swollen they are. It’s obvious he’s been crying and it physically hurts me to know I can’t reach out and comfort him.
“Serena.” He whispers, finding it hard to speak. “You’re really here?”
“I’m here.” I assure him, smiling weakly.
“Have they hurt you?” He demands, jumping up from his seat before making his way towards me.
“No, they haven’t. I’m ok.” I promise, placing my small hand against the pane of glass in front of me.
He does the exact same thing, mirroring my actions so our hands are almost touching.
“Tell me the truth… what did they do to you? What did they threaten you with to make you tell them all of those things?”
“Cole, I… I’m so sorry.” I apologise, hoping he will be able to understand how much this hurt me and what it cost for me to bring an end to this nightmare.
“Why are you sorry?” He challenges me harshly. “You know they’ve been lying to me, don’t you? They told me that you called them this morning and told them where we were. I know that can’t be true so I need to know what they said to you and why you look so scared.”
“Cole…” I sigh wearily, letting my hand fall away from his. “I did phone them. I told them where to find us.”
His mouth falls open with absolute shock and disbelief as I observe him closely. I despise the fact that I’m the reason behind his dismay and know that things will never be the same between us ever again.
“You can’t have.” He murmurs, shaking his head from side to side. “You wouldn’t do that to me. I don’t believe you.”
He slams his palms against the glass, causing me to take a step backwards. His fury is palpable and continues to increase, igniting as the seconds tick by.
“Cole, I had to. I had no choice.”
“Of course you had a choice!” He roars, tugging on his hair in frustration as he paces back and forth in front of me.
“I want you to be free.” I explain gently. “I want that for both of us and that wouldn’t have been possible if we were still on the run.”
“This is because of last night, isn’t it? It’s because of what we did.” He whispers darkly, refusing to tear his eyes away from my own.
He’s stopped pacing and now remains quiet, still and frozen as he awaits my response.
“You know nothing happened last night.”
My eyes beg him to go along with what I’m saying, trying to convey what I need him to know without saying the actual words.
God knows what the police might do if they find out we had sex last night… neither one of us can take that risk and I won’t allow him to divulge something so private between us.
“Ah, I see.” He chuckles with disdain. “I get it now. I understand.”
He sneers at me in contempt, refusing to listen or even begin to comprehend why I had to do this.
“What do you understand?” I ask him, glancing at the camera which remains pointed at us both.
“That you lied.” He growls, pressing his face up against the glass. “You lied to me from the start, didn’t you? You lied about your feelings for me, you lied about everything!”
“Cole, you know that’s not true! I did this for you!” I cry despairingly.
“You know they’re going to lock me up now, don’t you? They’re going to keep me in a cell for the rest of my fucking life and it’s all because of you! You did this to me, Serena. Just you.”
The venom in his eyes is potent. It wounds me beyond belief and shatters my soul. I can’t believe it has come to this. I can’t believe that I’m the one who is causing the man I love so much pain and heartache. I’ve destroyed everything.
“How can you say that to me? You’re the centre of my universe and you know that’s the truth. I have stuck by you through everything and that’s because I love you. I only called the police to help you.” I sob, pleading for his trust as well as his forgiveness.
“Bullshit.” He seethes, turning red with rage
and absolute loathing.
“Listen to me.” I say firmly, speaking with authority. “Cole, listen. I love you. I’ve always loved and that will never change. No matter how far apart we are… even if we don’t see each other again, I will still love you.”
“Then don’t leave me.” He begs, lowering his head as though he’s been wounded.
“I don’t have a choice.” I say softly, longing to reach out and hold him in my arms.
His contempt for me has vanished in what seems like an instant, disappearing into thin air as though it never even existed.
“Please don’t leave me, Green. I can’t do this without you. We can’t be separated because I won’t be able to survive without you. I’ll die.”
His voice breaks and all I can feel is his pain and sadness. He’s falling apart in front of me and I no longer have the strength to piece him back together.
“Baby, I can’t stay. They won’t let us be together and as much as you despise them for it, you know it’s the right decision. Please don’t make this any harder than it already is.”
“But I can’t live without you.” He groans, covering his face with his hands as he struggles to control his breathing.
“You will because you have to.” I say, placing my hand against the glass once more. “You can do this and so can I. We have to be strong because we have to say goodbye.”
“I’ can’t let you go, Serena. I just can’t.” He growls possessively, slamming his hands against the glass for the second time.
“You have to.”
“I’ll make sure I find you.” He promises me darkly. “I’ll never stop looking for you and as soon as they let me out I will find you. I’ll make sure you can never run from me again and next time I’ll keep you forever. You’re mine, Serena. You can’t hide from me forever.”
“Cole…”
“I mean it!” He yells, spinning around before he grabs the chair he was sitting on when I first came in.
He grabs it and flings it against the pane of glass between us, threatening to shatter it completely and that’s when two police officers storm into the room and restrain him. I watch in absolute horror as they force his arms behind his back and push him to the floor, one of them forcing his head to the ground and the other tying his ankles together.
That Summer (Part Two) Page 8