BOMAW 1-3

by Mercedes Keyes

  Now she watched him in action.

  Longing to be the woman whom he pounded away at. Georgiana's efforts increased as she masturbated watching him. She fell to her back and writhed on her bed covers trying to obtain the height of satisfaction she remembered she'd found at his hands. Reaching beside her, she grabbed the dildo that was molded from him. Having watched the movie before, she followed through after seeing the end of the 6 movies that advertised his penis saying, "You too can know the pleasures of 'Oscar Delight'! Don't let them be the only ones to feel such pleasure...emmmmm Oscar. - Get yours today.' She'd laughed when she realized the name of it was her husband's name as well and without hesitation, she did just that. Found where it was sold, surprised that they were still available, and now she used it to fill herself as she moaned, watching him in action, wishing that she were the woman administering fellatio.

  Finally it happened, she came to a climax, her body shivering and shaking as the movie went on. Laying on her bed, staring at the ceiling, her heart pounded as she thought of him. No matter how she tried to move on in life, there was something that brought her back to one clear conclusion. She was obsessed with him. It had to be obsession for her to be longing so as she did. Watching his porn movies. Purchasing his dildo. She sat up and looked at all the photographs of him surrounding her on the bed.

  She picked one up, it was a picture of him and Deidre - she'd cut out a face picture of herself and glued it over her daughters face. One by one she picked up each photograph and held them, smiling to herself. Seeing herself next to him as he smiled and held her. With her thumb nail she scratched at some of the smeared dry glue, blowing it from the picture. Bringing the picture of him to her lips, she kissed the image of him.

  "You're mine. You just don't realize it yet. Dating that - that nasty little - Negro! What's wrong with you - hmm - my darling - my love - what is it going to take to get through to you? You enjoyed me once, I know it was just as wonderful for you - as it was for me. Yet you fight it? Why? How many times must I come to you? What must I do to get through to you? No matter where you go - what you do - whom you're with - you still belong to me. Don't you know - I could give you the world. Everything your heart desires. Yet - you play this awful silly game. Playing hard to get - shame on you. I know you want me. I remember the words you said to me, the way you touched me, the feel of you - oooh..." She laid the pictures down and stared at the movie. Stared at the young man. Listening to the cries and gasps of the woman as he pumped into her with her legs over his shoulders, his length hard, huge and battering her as she cried out to endure him.

  Georgiana's heart was pounding as she laid back and used his dildo again. She was the woman, he was her man and somehow - some way... one day - he would love her again. He would touch her again, he would beg that she forgive him. That she please look upon him with adoration and know... that never again would he stray to another. One day... one day.

  Stepping out of the shower, with a towel wrapped around her body, and another around her hair, Georgiana packed away her pictures, picked up the tapes and put them all in a box that she hid in her closet. Coming out of it, she walked to the mirror and began drying her hair. She stood and took a closer look at herself in the mirror. The woman that looked back at her was still attractive, outside of the tiny lines at the corners of her eyes and bracketing her mouth. She leaned her head back, turned it left then right and looked at her neck, wondering about the skin growing loose there. She opened the towel and looked at her slender body. The tone of her skin. Her breast, they were small, empty, flat. Images of Sylvia kept playing over and over in her mind. She had very full, shapely lips, large dramatic, dark eyes.

  Wrapping the towel back around herself, Georgiana went to her phone and dialled a number.

  "Hello Brenda, it's me. I need a plastic surgeon, the best there is."

  Chapter 50

  "SHAWN! THAT'S VILE!!!"

  "DADDY!!! PEEE-UUU!!!"

  "What? What I do?" Shawn pretended innocence, lounging on the sofa in Sylvia's basement playing one of his Playstation games courtesy of her big screen, where he'd hooked it up once they'd gotten home from his parents, this was encouraged by Derrick and sons. Now that it was connected, Sylvia could see, her future husband was just a bit game addicted. Shawn was in heaven, just finished eating a fantastic meal Sylvia had prepared. A large pot of spaghetti mixed with one incredible sauce thick and rich, filled with chunky tomatoes mixed in with a tomato based paste, built up from there with perfect Italian sausage, ground beef, mushrooms galore, red and green bell peppers, onions, garlic, zucchini, and a herb mix out of this world. She baked from scratch, to die for garlic biscuits and made the most incredible salad with a warm tangy bacon salad dressing. He was full after two servings and now he lay relaxed with his evening comfort wear on. Gym briefs, socks and a tank top that Sylvia couldn't help but appreciate him in. Keeping her eyes off of him was quite the challenge, until he leaned to the left and cut one.

  "Daddy you know what you did!" Angela laughed holding her nose.

  "Shawn! You need to check yo' britches after that! God almighty, what - you need an enema?" Sylvia asked as she and Angela looked at each other, nodding that he most certainly did need one.

  "Why is it that the man always gets the blame? And besides, you fed me!" He informed her grinning, never taking his eyes off of his man, playing his game, refusing to let them break his concentration, he'd been at it for the last half an hour, moving up two levels, he was gonna conquer this game if it was the last thing he did that day.

  "Yeah right! I can see now you got me down for a sure thing, once they start fartin' - that's it!" She shook her head, folding up the last load of clothes, giving Angela a pile of her things to carry up to her room.

  They'd been back for two days from his parents, following Derrick who brought Angela with them. Derrick and family spent the day with them there, listening to Shawn's plans for the new house, and Meribel and Sylvia going over her ideas for turning her home into a bed and breakfast. The two women having so much in common from their past had no trouble at all fitting into an easy comfortable friendship. Sylvia had forgotten how nice it was to have someone to talk to about so many things. She and Meribel could talk about anything, that included Shanna as well, who was supposed to be coming the following week. Sylvia couldn't believe her luck in finding out that Shanna upholstered furniture and did custom designs in draperies and furniture. It seemed they would have plenty of help getting the project of a new home and a bed and breakfast underway.

  That morning, Shawn received the phone call from family services. All of his equipment and things had been checked and cleared. He went to the court house, was further briefed, collected his computer, laptop and personal home movies happy to hear that he could sleep in the same house with his daughter again. He had to set up counselling for himself and her while she was with him. Upon his return... Sylvia had an incredible meal waiting for him. She and Angela spent the day getting one of the extra bedrooms set up for her at her house. Sylvia was struggling with suddenly having to give up so much of her space so soon. There was no problem with Angela, the problem was with Shawn. He wanted to move in. His idea was to first get their home built across the road, and he'd move in with her. Once it was done, they could all move across the road and he would then get started on the house for the bed and breakfast, saying that many things he could do while they were living in it. Again, a miniature tiff had arisen.

  "Are you wanting us to get married and start our family now or not?!" He'd asked brusquely.

  "Why can't we do the bed and breakfast first... and then the house."

  "Either way it goes, we're going to have to live together Sylvia! Let's get our home built and finished first, we move in... then we can focus on here, and invest whatever is necessary and then open for the season next year."

  "I suppose... that makes sense." She gave in. Everything was happening so quickly. She was back and forth between being madly in love with
him, to grieving over her lost independence. She had to shake herself because of the thoughts, of - 'Was it not just last summer, that I was totally alone, and completely happy to be? Doing my own thing, didn't have to ask anyone, anything?'

  "What's wrong?" He asked, enclosing her within both of his arms as he braced against the kitchen counter, pinning her in place with her back against the counter as she tried not to look into his eyes. She had her right hand gripping his left forehand, trying to push it to free herself. He wasn't moving, she wasn't even going to try to get past him, neither did she feel like ducking beneath his arm so she finally looked up at him.

  "Will you let me out?" She asked tiredly.

  "What's wrong with you?" He repeated keeping her there before him.

  "Shawn... can I keep something to myself for once? Why do you have to know everything that's going on in my head?! Sometimes I want to share it, sometimes I don't."

  "What is wrong with us sharing everything? If there is something that keeps you from me, I want to know what it is. I'm gonna be your husband, you're gonna be my wife-..."

  "You don't have to keep telling me that. I know - okay - everyday I wake up - that day is coming closer and closer. There's no need for you to keep reminding me."

  Shawn leaned there staring into her eyes, hurt by her words, stunned that she could be so callous concerning something that he couldn't help but look forward to. His mind was working, thinking, he refused to move, to free her from the counter. "What are you afraid of? Why are you afraid? I mean, you are in love with me aren't you? Don't you want this?"

  Sylvia laid her head back stretching her slender neck before him, she felt her body grow weak, wanting to sink to her knees, she so badly wished to be left alone. She felt as if he were smothering her. No matter how fast she moved to adjust, he wanted her to adjust faster, now! His speed. She whimpered. "Shawn please... just leave me alone. Why is that so hard for you to do? We're engaged, I'm wearing your ring. I'm pregnant with your child, and I have temporary custody of your other one. I've met your family, our marriage is right around the corner, and now - you're moving in... be happy Shawn... you've got things just the way you want them."

  He went silent again, this time for so long Sylvia had to look at him, look into his eyes. She knew the way she sounded to him, but there was so much starting to build up around her now since their whole relationship began, she felt as if she had no control over anything in her life any more.

  "You're not in love with me are you? You really aren't."

  "Shawn! Don't start! I do... I am - in love with you."

  "Then what's this about? I'm trying to make things right. I'm trying to make everything happen in a way that you can be happy with. Yet - you're not happy. It must be me."

  "Shawn! Listen to me..." Sylvia took a deep breath trying to think, trying to find the words to use to make him understand. "Look... my plans were different from this. I guess, it's just that - well - I'm trying to let it all go. I mean... I get a bit irritated because here it is - another day - I haven't written a thing. Do you know that I haven't done any of my writing for over two weeks now. Nothing... I don't have time anymore. I'm suddenly smack dab right in the middle of a family again. I'm suddenly right back, to putting everything I've always wanted to do... to the back burner again. I went from making all the necessary sacrifices, and putting my children's needs first, and getting my life in order so that when they left, I could then do what I've always wanted to do. Armundo died, and I was left alone. I got used to it. I became independent and realized, now was my time. Then here you come, grinning and turning my perfect world upside down." She sighed. "I was ... I was content... and.... now... once again... I can't go back. I can't undo what - you've done to my life."

  "I thought I made you happy Sylvia?" He asked it so pitifully she melted.

  "You doooo... its just that - see, that's why I didn't want to tell you!" She snapped irritated. "Leave me alone and let me work it out in my head. Sometimes, there are things wrong, that I feel I need to fix myself... I may not always share what's wrong with me, with you, to fix it for me, and because of that... I try not to tell you. This situation is my problem and I have to make it right for me." She said, only she knew the double meaning to it all.

  "Surely you can't expect me to ignore that there's something wrong with my wife? I can't help wanting to know. When I see you like this, it makes me feel that you regret being with me. That you're sorry you ever let me into your life. That you're sorry I got you pregnant, and sorry that your life is now totally off from what you planned. That - going through my head, makes me feel that this is all about me, what I want and not about you, about what you want. Basically... you scare me Sylvia. I can't help but feel that you are going to discover somewhere along the way, that you don't want me or what I'm trying to build for us." He admitted with his heart pounding, all he wanted was Sylvia. Sylvia to be happy, Sylvia to laugh, Sylvia to smile, Sylvia to want what he wanted, Sylvia to love him just as much as he loved her.

  Sylvia inhaled and let it out slowly.

  "Shawn... I know that I can't go back to how I use to be...not now... you've made a mark on my life that cannot be ignored." She said.

  "Well thanks Sylvia... thanks a lot, boy does that feel good to know." He complained sarcastically.

  "Oh come on Shawn... I don't mean it the way it comes out. I mean, I can't imagine going forward without you now."

  "I hope to GOD that you can't! I know what my life was before I had you. I'm trying to do things right for you Sylvia, I swear to God I am. I'll tell you what. Now that Angela and I can be together in the same house and I can be alone with her, we'll leave you to yourself for a while. And... and I'll give you a whole day if you need it. To be alone, to write, whatever it is you need to do. Or - or maybe an hour or two everyday... that will be your time... how's that?"

  "And when the baby comes? Then what?"

  "No different. I'll take the baby, Angela and we'll get out of your hair for two hours a day. Whatever you feel you need."

  Sylvia felt like a heal, that old fashioned sense of being a wife and mother kicked up, and she just could not bring herself to put it all on him. She knew she had to accept the change that was taking place in her life. "Oh Shawn. That's so nice of you, but I know better. You're not going to be able to keep that up every day with having to meet with your deadlines. With all that we have to get done. Let's just... agree on a give and take when needed. I know that now I have to go back to scheduling my time. We'll work together because I don't want this to turn out always one sided, with you having to adjust to make me happy. I know I need to let go... not of everything... but some things. Just my knowing that you're willing to give me the time I need when I need it, is good enough right now... okay?"

  "You sure?"

  "Yes...I'm sure. Just give me some time to deal with it all okay? Stop overreacting to my mood swings. Sometimes I may go down a bit, but I can usually pick myself up out of it."

  He pulled her to him and hugged her. "Just as long as I know that you love me. I can deal with the mood swings... just... just never leave me Sylvia... that's all I ask."

  She hugged him back tightly, her face pressed against his chest, "I'll always love you, as much as you love me, that's what I promise." She declared. He held her tightly as he signed wondering how in the hell did he ever get hold of such a woman as Sylvia Payne? Never in his life had he to work so to keep a woman, if things didn't go his way, he usually just walked away. It had usually been the women who worked hard to keep him, who regretted doing anything to turn him off. Holding her, he knew it was not the same... Sylvia would sooner tell him to kiss her ass before she begged him. He knew that she loved him, but she would not give him the satisfaction of obtaining her very soul. He knew it was a terrible thought, but that's what he wanted... her very soul... because she sure as hell had his.

  Sylvia held onto him, knowing of course what she explained was only part of the problem. Jake was the other part. She
was just glad to be home, feeling her heart speed up as Shawn kissed her forehead and lowered himself to kiss her mouth. With her eyes closed, she tested what she knew about her man, no doubt now that it was him who kissed her. She knew her Shawn. This was the kiss that stirred her, not the one that Jake had forced on her the second night at Shawn's parents.

  She'd been so happy and carefree, letting Shanna and Meribel talk her into playing twilight hide and seek. They'd all been having such a good time, dancing by the bon fire, laughing and joking until she let her guard down after spending the day avoiding him like the plague. The entire family was out in the yard except for Shawn's parents who were on the front porch, talking and enjoying the evening, laughing at their antics when the siblings and grandchildren initiated the game. She had said she didn't wish to play, but they talked her into it. An area was charted out, and no one could hide beyond it's perimeter. Shawn had whispered in her ear that he was going to find her in her hiding place and have his wicked way with her, she'd laughed and taunted, "No way." She'd dashed quickly away from him and made a few circles to lose him, thanks to Angela distracting him, it worked. She'd made her way into the dark vehicle barn, hiding in a corner behind one of the four-wheelers. Someone else had entered, and was moving towards her. Laughing to herself, she fought to stay quiet, wondering how was it that he found her so quickly. Then she heard him very softly whisper, "Where are you?" It had sounded so much like Shawn. Giggling she'd whispered back, "You'll have to find me." Looking forward to him finding her, she'd stayed put, snickering and laughing as he stumbled and fumbled around to find her. She had been unable to see him, but she'd heard him as he'd made his way to her, the moment he'd felt around locating her, he'd pinned her against the wall and his mouth was on hers in an instant. A powerfully aggressive kiss that shocked her, because from the moment he'd pressed against her, she knew. This was not Shawn kissing her. Panicking, Sylvia shoved at him with all of her might, but he clung, trying to press his body against hers, holding her to him as he ravaged her mouth. She twisted her face away, and began slapping at him.