The Doctor Who Made Her Love Again

by Susan Carlisle

  It had been so long for him and he found China irresistible. She hadn’t complained and she was always eager to please. Maybe he’d demanded too much. She’d seemed reluctant to leave him during their long kiss that had had him hot for her again before she’d climbed the stairs to her apartment. In fact, if he hadn’t been afraid he’d sound pathetic, he would’ve beg to go up with her.

  Heaven help him, he had it bad. If he didn’t pull it together he’d pounce on China the second she entered the clinic. Robin, Jean and Doris would appreciate that show but he had no doubt that China wouldn’t. He glanced at his watch again. With a snort of disgust he pulled another chart off the stack.

  Payton sensed China before he looked up to find her standing in the doorway.

  “Hey,” she said almost shyly.

  “Hey.” He grinned and came around the desk. To his disappointment, Larry came up behind her.

  * * *

  China didn’t know what she was thinking when she stopped by Payton’s office. That wasn’t her habit when she came in for her shift but she’d been dying to see him. Even her gardening hadn’t interfered with her daydreaming about him. She’d relived every moment they’d spent together, had even started to believe they might be building something lasting. Still, the closer she’d come to work time the more insecure she’d become. Maybe he’d just wanted her because she’d been available. He’d been sick, she was the first girl...

  With nervous jitters, she’d approached his door and spoken. She had been relieved to see Payton smile and heat had come to his eyes. The same disappointment she felt showed on his face when Larry stepped up behind her. Just a look as simple and unsolicited as his made her stomach flutter. A warm, mushy feeling washed over her.

  For all her believing she’d never let it happen, she’d fallen hopelessly in love with Payton.

  “Hi, China,” Larry said, as he squeezed by her into the office. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” He glanced at Payton and then at her.

  “No,” she and Payton said in unison.

  Larry gave them both curious looks. She lowered her eyes and said, “I’ll let you two talk.”

  China took a report from Robin then headed down the hall to speak to the two patients who were waiting in the exam rooms. Payton met her coming up the hall. He glanced around then grabbed her arm and pulled her into an empty exam room. Closing the door, he leaned back against it and brought her against him.

  “I’m not leaving without this.” His lips found hers.

  Any concern she’d had that Payton might not still be interested in her vanished. His mouth was hot and heavy, asking, begging and taking. She tugged his knit collared shirt from his pants and slipped her hands underneath, finding his warm skin, letting her fingers trail around to his back.

  One long delicious kiss later China pulled away. Payton’s eyes held an intensity that said he wanted more. He desire pressed thickly against her. She sighed. Nothing had changed.

  She said softly, “Payton, this isn’t the time or place.”

  He let his forehead rest against hers. “I know. Can I see you tonight after you get off?”

  “My parents are expecting me for dinner tonight.”

  He let her step away but didn’t release her. “I’d love to meet your parents.”

  Was she ready for that? That wasn’t a step forward she was sure she could make. What would Payton think of them?

  “I don’t know.”

  “Why? I’ve got to meet them some time. Come on, China. You’re not ashamed of me, are you?” He grinned.

  How could she say no? The man she loved should know everything about her. Especially her parents. “Don’t be silly. If you want to go then be here at seven.”

  * * *

  Payton was sitting in the parking lot talking on the phone with his friend and physician when China slipped into the passenger seat. He smiled in welcome.

  “Yes, John. I’ll have it redrawn tomorrow first thing.”

  “This won’t wait, Payton. None of that pretending it will go away stuff. There may be nothing to it but I’m not taking any chances at this stage.”

  “I understand. I’ll be a model patient, I promise.”

  “That’ll be a change for the better.”

  “Funny, buddy, very funny.”

  “Tomorrow. No excuses.”

  “I got the message. Later, John.”

  Concern marred China’s features. “What was that all about?”

  “Nothing. Just a friendly reminder to have my blood drawn.”

  “That’s all there is to it, isn’t there?”

  “Yes.” He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss on the lips before starting the car.

  She gave him a suspicious look. “You would tell me if something is wrong?”

  “China, stop fussing. I’m fine. Leave it alone,” he said, more sharply than he’d intended.

  “I only asked because—”

  He took her hand and squeezed it. “I know you care. Okay, which way to your parents’?”

  “They live out the Bay Road but we’ve got to stop by the grocery store first.”

  He backed the car out of the parking spot. “What? You don’t do the grocery shopping?”

  “Mom needs a few things and she asked me to stop by and get them.”

  “Is she sick?”

  “No. Why?”

  “I was just wondering why she couldn’t do her own shopping.” Payton pulled into the main street and headed toward the store.

  “She mentioned she needed to pick up a few things and I offered to get them for her. Do you have a problem stopping?”

  “No, I was just surprised, that’s all.”

  Forty-five minutes later Payton turned the car into the crushed shell drive China indicated. It was a simple board and batten house on stilts, facing the bay. Painted a light gray and trimmed in white, it was similar to the other homes lining the road. It had a long green manicured lawn that met a pier that stretched out into the water. Plants graced the porch that wrapped around the place on three sides. It was obviously a well cared-for home.

  Payton gathered the grocery bags from the trunk and followed China up the steps to wait beside her at the front door. A woman with short gray hair and world-weariness about her mouth greeted them at the door. She offered a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. How long had it been since she’d been truly happy?

  “Hi, honey, come on in.” Mrs. Davis stepped back and allowed China and Payton to enter.

  “Mama, this is Payton Jenkins.”

  “Welcome, Payton. China told me she was bringing a friend. It’s nice to meet you.”

  At one time being China’s friend had sounded good but now he wanted to be more. “Hi, Mrs. Davis. It’s nice to meet you.”

  She closed the door and led them into a large, comfortable-looking room.

  “China, I’ve waited for you to start dinner.”

  Payton looked at China. She seemed okay with the arrangement. Why wasn’t her mom cooking? China had been at work all afternoon.

  “Well, I’ll get started on the potatoes. I guess Father will want pork chops. I’ll add a salad as well. Father should be home soon, shouldn’t he?”

  “Yes, I expect him any minute.”

  “Payton, you can bring those in here.” China indicated the bags he still held. He followed her through the living room into the kitchen. It was much smaller than his but efficient-looking. He placed the groceries on the counter.

  “Why don’t you go out and talk to Mom while I get supper together?” China reached for a bag and started to unpack it.

  Leaning his hip against the counter, he said, “You don’t want my help?”

  “No, I’ll get it.”

  What was going on? Chin
a hated to go grocery shopping and wasn’t that big a fan of cooking. He reluctantly left her and returned to the living room.

  “Payton, come in and make yourself at home. China can handle dinner. Have a seat.” Mrs. Davis indicated a chair across the room from the one she was taking.

  Payton sank into the overstuffed chair. Further across the room sat a well-used recliner. It had to belong to China’s father. On a table near by Payton saw a grouping of pictures of a boy at various stages in his life. The arrangement reminded him of a shrine. The pictures had to be of China’s brother. His disappearance hung like a shroud over the family. Payton scanned the room and only found one picture of China and another of a girl that could only be her sister.

  “So, Payton, are you from around here?” Mrs. Davis asked.

  “No, I’m from Chicago.”

  She gave him a look of interest. “Chicago? Well, you’re a long way from home.”

  “I am.”

  “Are you here on vacation?”

  Before Payton could answer the question, what had to be the door from the carport area below opened and an average-sized man with thinning hair entered. He wasn’t the big burly man Payton had pictured from China’s description of him.

  “Hi, Father,” China chirped, in an overly happy voice.

  “Hi. What’s for supper?”

  “Pork chops, of course. They’re your favorite, aren’t they?” She stepped out of the kitchen and kissed him on the cheek. “Father, I’d like you to meet Payton Jenkins. He works with me.”

  The man turned his piercing look to Payton as if interrogating him. For a second Payton almost squirmed under Mr. Davis’s scrutiny but caught himself. He returned a level gaze. Hadn’t China said her father was a rigid man? Payton was too old, had been through too much to let someone intimidate him. He rose and offered his outstretched hand to Mr. Davis, who took it in a sound handshake that made Payton believe he might have gained some respect.

  “Father, supper should be ready in about fifteen minutes.”

  “Good, I’m hungry.”

  “Hi, hon,” Mr. Davis said, stepping over to kiss Mrs. Davis on the forehead.

  “I think I’ll see if I can help China.” Payton stood and headed for the kitchen. Was he imagining that the atmosphere had turned cooler and the women tensed when the head of the house had come in? The click-click of the recliner footrest cranking up told Payton that Mr. Davis had taken his chair.

  Some time later, Payton helped China place the platters of food on the table.

  “Supper,” she called.

  Payton saw Mrs. Davis rise from her chair. “Please, come join us, Jim,” she said, low enough that Payton had the impression that she didn’t want him to hear her pleading.

  “No, I’ll just eat here. I’ve had a long day.”

  Payton’s mom might not have been the one to cook the meal but she’d seen to it that their family had always shared the evening meal together. That was one point his mom had never wavered on. Payton’s father would have never gotten away with China’s father’s attitude.

  “Mama, I’ll fix him a plate. Come on and join us.” China picked up one of the plates off the table.

  Payton watched, amazed, as she hurriedly spooned food in large portions onto it. China also worked all day and now she was playing server girl to her father? What had happened to the person who had stood up to him so many times?

  China had just finished putting food on her own plate when her father called from the other room, “This pork chop is a little too done.”

  “I’m sorry, Father. You can have mine.” China jumped up and headed to the living area with her plate in her hand.

  Payton shook his head in disbelief. It took all his self-control not to take the plate from her and drag her out of the house. China had turned into a super-pleaser. Couldn’t she see that her father was manipulating her? Had she been doing this for years?

  When his look caught her mom’s she smiled. Didn’t she see what was going on? She acted as if China’s actions were natural. They certainly appeared to be the norm in this house. He saw them as very dysfunctional and unhealthy.

  China brought back her father’s half of a pork chop on her plate. Going into the kitchen, she returned with no meat on her plate. She took her seat but didn’t meet his gaze. He cut what was left of his meat and placed it on her plate. She glanced at him in surprise, as if everyone, including her, expected her to go without part of her meal.

  “So, Payton, you were telling me what brought you to Golden Shores,” Mrs. Davis said in an almost apologetic tone.

  They carried on a conversation with no further interaction with China’s father. After dinner, Payton helped China do the dishes. When they left she kissed her father on the forehead. He acknowledged her with a grunt and continued to watch his TV show. Payton wanted to shake the man. Didn’t he realize what a wonderful person China was? She deserved to be treated better by her family. Payton said good evening to the man, whose only response was to raise a hand briefly.

  At his car, Payton opened the door for China then got in himself. He turned to her. “Exactly what happen in there?”

  She gave him a puzzled look. “What do you mean?”

  “The way you acted.”

  “How’s that?”

  “Like a servant. As if you couldn’t speak up for yourself.”

  “They’re my parents. I didn’t do anything that I haven’t always done. They need me.”

  What if he got sick again? Would she treat him the same way she had her father? Care for him more out of guilt than love? He wanted to be loved for who he was, not because someone needed to be needed. He couldn’t, wouldn’t put himself or China through that. They both deserved more. Janice may have hurt him but at least she’d been honest about what she could take. Could China bring herself to do that if he became ill again? Could he afford to take the chance of finding out?

  “China, you actually gave your father your meal.” He didn’t try to keep his disbelief out of his voice. “Even more astounding is that he took it without argument.”

  “He’s my father,” she said in an ashamed voice.

  “But that doesn’t mean you should let him walk all over you. As strong a person as I’ve seen you be, not only with me but in medical situations, and you become a completely different person when you’re around your parents. Why?”

  “I don’t.”

  “Yes, you do.”

  “They’re all I have.”

  “No, they’re not. You’ve got a sister.”

  “She doesn’t have anything to do with us.”

  “After what I just saw, I’m not surprised.”

  “You’re going too far now.”

  “I don’t think so. I care about you and I know how you act around your parents isn’t healthy. What’re you afraid of? That if you’re not the perfect child that your father will give you the same ultimatum he gave your brother and your mom will let it happen? You’re an adult now. You don’t have to have their blessing anymore. Don’t you think it’s time for you to have a life not controlled by them? When was the last time you told them you wouldn’t be cooking supper when you came over? Do they even know that you hate the grocery store?”

  “That’s enough, Payton.”

  “China, you can’t make up for the fact that they don’t know where your brother is or ease their guilt. They have to learn to live with the past just like you do. You have to find security without living in fear of their rejection. What I saw tonight was you trying to keep the peace at all costs. That’s not good for you or them.”

  “They’ve already lost two children. If I don’t come around—”

  “Then maybe they’ll have to deal with each other and the way things are. They can handle life without you holding their hands.”

/>   She turned to him, her jaw clenched and lips drawn into a tight, thin line. “Well, it must be nice to sit on the outside and look in. To know what everyone else should do Mr. I-ran-away-from-home-because-I-couldn’t-take-the-pressure.”

  “I didn’t run away from home. I decided to live elsewhere. Take my life in a different direction.”

  “Some of us don’t have that luxury. Like my brother... When life got too hard in one place, you just picked up and left. Sometimes you have to stay and deal with what is happening. I learned to deal the best way I know how. You haven’t even made an effort to really talk to your parents, have you? Explain how you really feel? I don’t see that we’re all that different. What I know is that you can point out others’ issues but you can’t see your own.”

  That stung. More than he wanted to admit. “My parents have expectations, demands.”

  “And you don’t think mine do?” she threw back at him.

  “I know yours do but you don’t need to let them make you feel like you’re twelve again when all you want to do is please them so you can feel loved.”

  “I’m sorry I’m not who you think I should be.” She opened the door. “I’ll get Mom to drive me home. Thanks for a wonderful evening,” she spat, and slammed the door.

  Payton watched in disbelief as China stalked off. Had he just been hit by a Gulf storm? What had just happened? How could she not see what her parents were doing to her?

  Surely when she calmed down China would come around. In the scheme of things, what they were fighting over was nothing. He knew life and death and this wasn’t it. He’d give her some room to cool down and then they’d work it out. What they had together was too good to let go of just like that.

  He slowly backed out of the drive. With one last glance back at the house he drove down the road, leaving an even bigger gap between them.

  * * *

  China couldn’t remember a more uncomfortable discussion with her mom than trying to explain why she’d stomped back into the house and asked for a ride home. She’d didn’t want to talk about Payton. He was wrong. She didn’t do what he accused her of doing.