Benevolent

by Leddy Harper

  I made it back to her just as she slowly began to pull down the zipper.

  “I’ll take it from here,” I told her, grabbing the waistline of her pants and began to pull them down. I took my time, never wanting the moment to be over with. I had waited for it for so long that I didn’t want to rush it.

  I got her pants past her hips and to her thighs before needing to stop. Her underwear was black and lace. My dick was a full hard-on against my thigh. I continued slowly, pulling her pants to her knees before stopping again. The sight of her creamy thighs caused me to leak some pre-come and I felt the cold wetness against my leg. I finished pulling them off her until they fell to the ground along with her heels. I looked down and smiled before picking her shoes up off the floor.

  I held one leg in my hands, carefully placing her shoe back on her tiny foot. I then kissed her from her ankle to high on her inner thigh. She moaned and leaned back on her hands. My eyes met hers and I smiled at the look on her face. I had never seen a look of such pleasure before. I grabbed her other shoe and repeated it on the other leg, stopping just before I reached her underwear. My dick jerked in my pants the closer I got to her snatch.

  She let out a breath of air and bucked her hips, desperately trying to get her cunt in my face. I appeased her momentarily by laying a soft kiss on her covered lips. I knew what she wanted, it was the same thing I wanted, but I had to take my time.

  Her fists came up and grabbed me by my hair, pulling me to her mouth. She devoured my lips with hers and began to lean back on the table. I was pulled over, covering her body with mine as she wrapped her legs around me and pressed her pelvis into me. I knew she felt how hard I was. She couldn’t have missed it. I don’t think I had ever been that hard before in my life. She continued to grind herself on me, letting out hungry groans into my mouth.

  With one hand, I began to unbutton her shirt without ever taking my mouth from hers. As her tongue danced with mine, I managed to safely unbutton every last one of them. I didn’t want to rip any off, since it was the shirt she’d have to wear out of the office, but I wasn’t opposed to popping a few if need be. Luckily, I didn’t have to resort to that.

  Once I had her shirt opened, I pulled away from her lips to take a look at her body. I had seen her in a bathing suit, but that was different. Even though I saw her stomach and covered breasts and the tops of her thighs out on the boat, seeing her on my conference table was different. Imagining getting her naked and burying myself balls deep in her was far different than knowing I would be doing that very soon.

  My fingertips trailed down her neck to the middle of her chest. Her legs grew tighter around me the lower my finger got. Dragging it out was killing me, but I never wanted it to end. I never wanted her to put her shirt or pants back on. I never wanted her to get off the table. My only option at prolonging it was to go slow. It was painful, but I would endure it.

  Eden arched her back off the table and I reached beneath her, snapping the clasps of her bra. The thin black fabric fell away from her full tits and gave way just enough for me to push it out of the way. I took one look at them before leaning down and taking one nipple in my mouth, sucking hard on it. After all of my wondering about what they looked like, nothing compared to the real thing. All of my wet dreams about what they tasted like never came close to real life. They were pink, just as I pictured them in my mind the countless times I had thought about them. They were the perfect size to suck on, too. I ran my tongue over her hardening nipple before flicking it a few times. I gave it one more suck before releasing it with a pop.

  My fingers took over as my mouth moved on to the other side. I flicked that one with my tongue as well, listening intently to the changes in her breathing before gently tugging on it between my teeth. She moaned and her legs tightened even harder around me. All I wanted was to be inside of her. I knew it would come. But I needed to explore the rest of her before doing so.

  I continued to kiss down her flat stomach as he legs slowly let go of their hold on me. The lower I got to her underwear, the more her abdomen sucked in. I licked her bellybutton once before yanking the thin fabric away that was hiding her cunt from me. I got my nose so close to it and took in a deep breath. She smelled like soap with a hint of sweetness. It was my new favorite scent.

  She let out a grunt and pushed her hips up further, letting me know what she wanted from me. I took her legs and put them over my shoulders, feeling her bare thighs against my neck and the heels of her shoes on my back. I gave her cunt one more kiss before sliding my tongue through her folds, tasting her salty juices and letting the metallic taste seep into my taste buds. I never wanted to taste anything else for the rest of my life. The taste alone made my cock tingle.

  I licked her a few times before finding her clit. I ran my teeth along it, looking up at her and finding her staring right back at me. Her mouth was open as her breathing began to quicken. I noticed her stomach had begun to convulse. I completely covered her with my mouth, burying my nose in the small patch of trimmed hair on her pelvic bone. I sucked, making out with her cunt while flicking my tongue back and forth. Her head tilted back and I stopped. She looked back at me and I smiled as I kept eye contact with her. She was about to protest when I shoved my tongue inside of her. Her legs tightened around my neck as she let out the sexiest squeal I had ever heard.

  She pressed herself into my mouth harder and I backed away, popping two fingers in my mouth and then pumping them into her wet cunt. She was drenched and I wanted to taste every bit of it. As I finger fucked her, I went back to flicking her hard clit with my tongue again. It didn’t take her long after that to begin shaking again. I knew what she was feeling because my cock was throbbing like a son of a bitch by that point. I didn’t stop. I sucked harder on her clit, curled my fingers more, and felt the inside of her pussy grasp them like a vice grip.

  She fell back on the table and arched her back, pressing her bare tits high in the air. She took one nipple in between her fingers and began to twist as she let out a long, loud moan. The sound grew louder as she tightened her legs around my neck, almost to the point of cutting off my air. Her heels dug into my back, probably ripping the fabric of my shirt. And my dick was about to explode against my leg.

  Once she began to relax, I kept it up for a few more seconds. I wanted to make sure she had ridden out every last wave I had given her. Then I licked her from back to front, making sure to get every bit of her come on my tongue before swallowing. I straightened up and locked eyes with her again, just before bringing my fingers to my mouth to suck them dry. It was the dessert to my meal.

  She sat up, taking hold of my hand, and shoved my pussy-coated fingers in her mouth. Her soft, warm tongue massaged both fingers, licking herself from them. I had never seen anything hotter and my cock agreed with me. It was throbbing to the point of pain. I needed relief. I needed to release before I came all over myself and the warmth of her tongue didn’t help.

  I stood in between her legs as she sat up on the edge of the table. My hands went straight to her hair and pulled her mouth to mine. Her hands went straight to my belt and began to quickly unfasten it before moving to the button and zipper.

  Eden pushed my pants to my knees and freed my cock without ever taking her lips from mine. The cool air hit me instantly before her hands quickly covered my cock. She used my pre-come as lube as she began to pump it in her hands. I wanted to be inside of her so bad. It was the only thing I could think about.

  Before I could do anything, she slid off the table and knelt in front of me. I was about to say something, but then her tongue flicked the head and I was gone. Once my dick was in her wet, warm mouth and I felt her soft tongue massage the underside, I knew I wasn’t going to last.

  “Fuck, Eden…” was all I could say as my fingers twisted in her fiery red hair.

  She hummed around my cock, sending vibrations through me. It took everything I had to not explode right then and there. The building explosion was nearly blinding as I felt the t
ip touch the back of her throat. She had one hand at the base, pumping what couldn’t fit in her mouth, and the other was doing something to my balls. I didn’t know what she was doing to them, all I knew was that it was amazing and I never wanted her to stop.

  I took one look down and saw my dick move in and out of her mouth. That was it. Between the humming, her tongue, and the sight of me moving in and out between her red lips that were made for sucking cock, I was gone.

  “Eden…” I tried to get out but my voice wouldn’t let me. I started to pull back on her hair, to let her know. “Eden, Eden, Eden. I’m going to come.”

  She hummed again and began suck harder, pressing her tongue against the sensitive underside. My body exploded as I closed my eyes tight and instinctively pushed on the back of her head until I felt her throat open up around me.

  I let it all out, feeling it rip through me until she was swallowing all of me. Once it began to settle, I loosened my grip and felt the last twitches of my cock against her lips. I knew I had a smile on my face because I felt it fall once I looked down at Eden. Tears were leaking from the side and the black liner she wore began to smudge beneath.

  “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” I was worried and it showed in my voice.

  “Yeah,” she answered unconvincingly. “It’s fine, I just gagged a bit at the end.”

  It was logical and a good excuse if she hadn’t averted her eyes and began to pick her pants up off the floor to dress. I watched her carefully as she pulled her underwear on and then each pant leg. I was still hanging out, so I decided to fix my clothes as well while she was turned around. The silence filled the air and I grew more concerned by the second.

  “Eden, talk to me. Did I hurt you? Are you sure you’re okay?”

  She spun around, buttoning her pants and smiled. “I’m fine. Stop worrying.”

  Her smile was reassuring but it did little to help calm my nerves. I decided to say the first thing on my mind instead of waiting through any more silence. “Let’s go away this weekend. Just me and you. I have to be out of the condo anyway, so let’s just go. Anywhere you want to go, let’s do it.”

  I watched as her eyes darted around the room.

  “I don’t know, Dane. Don’t you think this is rushing it? I mean, you just walked away from your fiancée this morning and had me spread out on your conference table within an hour.”

  “You didn’t seem to mind,” I teased, trying to lighten the mood.

  She smiled and let out a soft laugh. “I guess I was caught up in everything. It seems like I’ve been waiting forever to hear you tell me you weren’t with her. And when you finally told me you wanted to be with me, I couldn’t think about anything else. All rational thought was gone. But now that the moment is over, I can think clearer, and I think this is way too fast.”

  “Too fast? We’ve been dancing around each other for over a month now.”

  “Yes, we have. You’re right. What if all of this has just been built up and we do this thing only for it to fall apart once we fulfill those fantasies? I don’t want that. It would have been one thing if you just woke up this morning and decided to do something for yourself. If you just decided you were done with it all and then came to me. But you didn’t. She forced your hand. You didn’t come to me because it was what you wanted. You came because she allowed you to.”

  I could feel my temper begin to rise again as my words came out in an elevated tone. “Just because that’s not the way it happened doesn’t mean I haven’t wanted to come to you every fucking day since the day we met. This entire thing has eaten me alive. I have woken up every day, wanting to change it all. But I couldn’t. She’s not stable. Clearly. And before this morning, I haven’t made the break because of my fear for what she’d do to herself.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “A few years ago, I tried to tell her how unhappy I was. I wanted her to know that how she felt affected me as well. If she wasn’t going to try to make things better, I didn’t know how much longer I would have been able to stay. But I wasn’t able to get it all out. She thought I was telling her I was leaving and began to say shit. She said she wouldn’t have anywhere to go if I left her. She didn’t have anyone and that there’d be no point in living. I knew then that I would never be able to leave.”

  “And you’re not concerned about that now?”

  I huffed, trying to think of the right way to say it. “This is going to sound cold, but it’s not how I mean it. She’s not my problem anymore. Do I want her to kill herself? Absolutely not. But I cannot consciously stay with her after knowing what she did, just to save her. This whole time I thought she was broken because of what he did to her. During his trial, she tried to commit suicide. Now I realize it was nothing but her own guilt over what she did to him. I have stayed through countless miserable years because I wanted to make her feel safe. I see now that I can’t. She’s fucked up and it’s her own damn fault. I can’t fix that.”

  “Maybe you just need some time to think about it all before rushing to a decision. I don’t want to be your backup. You haven’t been single in twelve years. Take some time for yourself.”

  “I don’t want that.” I spoke loud and clear, looking her straight in the eyes in the hopes of convincing her. “I want you. I have wanted you since I met you in the bar. I have wanted you every day since then. I come to work happy, knowing I get to see you. I go to the pier, hopeful that your there. I walk the beach with you on my mind and a smile on my face. I go to sleep thinking about you. And I jerk off to images of you. Don’t you see? The only times I am happy is when it comes to you. You said you wanted me to be happy. Well, you do it, babe. What more do you want?”

  “I don’t want to do this and it fall apart in days or weeks. I want to make sure it’s right.”

  “We could wait, give it time, and the possibility of it falling apart would still be there. There are no guarantees. You just have to go after it and see what happens. I want to see what will happen. I want a chance to be happy. I want you. All of you. For as long as you’ll give it to me.”

  She stood in front of me and stared, breathing shallow breaths in and out. I could see her thinking it though, and I couldn’t recall ever being so anxious to hear words before in my life. Even if she didn’t agree with me, I would never stop. I would keep trying until I won her over. She was all I wanted. She made me happy and I just wanted to be happy.

  “Let’s just go away,” I suggested again. “I don’t care where, I only care that you’re with me. We don’t have to have sex. We don’t have to do anything but talk if that’s what you want. I just want the time with you.”

  I felt desperate for her answer. I begged her with my eyes. Each passing second hurt more than the last and I didn’t know if I had the patience to wait for her answer.

  I moved closer to her, reaching out and touching her face. I wanted to reassure her. I wanted to comfort her and make her understand where I was coming from. She wasn’t a fallback. I didn’t go to her because I was angry or felt betrayed. It had nothing to do with Gabi. It was all Eden. It had been Eden since the first time I spoke to her. That first laugh got me and never let me go.

  “Okay,” she said softly.

  I wanted to make sure I understood her right. I needed to make sure I hadn’t imagined it. “Okay, you’ll go away with me this weekend?” I asked just to clarify.

  She stared right into my eyes, a smile lit up her face, and she nodded. “Okay… I’ll go away with you this weekend.”

  I wanted to fist-pump the air. I wanted to howl like an animal. But I didn’t. I smiled so big my face hurt and then kissed her. I didn’t want to stop kissing her. I wanted to kiss her for the entire weekend. The entire next week. The entire month of September and into October. I wanted to kiss her for the rest of my life. But much like all good things, it had to come to an end when a knock sounded at my door.

  We both backed away at the same time. Her smirk nearly did me in.

  “Do we look like
we just fucked?” I asked quietly.

  “You look fine. What about me?”

  “Well, of course, I look fine. I always look fine. But do I look like I just got the best motherfucking blow job known to man?”

  She smiled and shook her head.

  “Okay, fine. You look… glowing. Like you just got your pussy eaten out by a god.” I turned to walk to the door and heard her laughing all the way to her office.

  Alex was at the door when I finally opened it. “I’m sorry, sir, but you have a phone call. I don’t think your phone is working and it sounds like an emergency. I tried to take a message but she didn’t want me to. She said she needed to speak to you immediately.”

  The weight of the world settled back on my shoulders again. “Thank you, Alex. I’ll get it.”

  I closed the door and headed back to my desk. I sat there and stared at the phone for what felt like forever. I didn’t know what to expect other than bad news. There was no way it would have been anything other than that.

  “Dane Kauffmann,” I answered in the most normal voice I could find. It didn’t work, though. I sounded… angry, upset, maybe even a little worried. And that was just to my own ears. I wasn’t sure how I sounded to the person on the other end of the line.

  “Dane, please let me explain,” a hysterical Gabi pleaded on the other end.

  “I’m at work. I’m busy. I don’t want to hear your explanations.”

  “If you would just listen to me—”

  “I said all I needed to say this morning, Gabriella. I have nothing else to say. I’ve heard all I needed to hear. There’s nothing you could possibly say to make me change my mind. I’m done. Fucking done. And the more time you waste by trying to get me to listen, the less time you have to get your shit out of my house. I want you gone. I don’t know how else to say it.”

  She was crying and saying words I couldn’t understand. I wasn’t heartless. Her crying did have an effect on me, but so did my anger. I was in a battle with my emotions. I had spent the majority of the last decade trying to make things right; I didn’t want to anymore. I was so tired, exhausted from the fight. I didn’t want to feel like that any longer. I couldn’t take any more of the guilt I felt at her pain. The pain she felt was self-induced and I couldn’t help that. I couldn’t fix her or make it better for her.