This Can't be Life

by Shakara Cannon

  “I can’t believe this asshole is denying my friend. I know they had a relationship. I know it! He was out there to see him.”

  “Well something is definitely up with this Tyron Marks guy. He just doesn’t seem to be telling the truth. And to be honest with you, I can understand why. Not to say that it’s right, but he has a lot to protect. If he was linked to this in any way, it could have huge ramifications. He lawyer’d up on us when I asked if he would be willing to take a lie detector test. Something is definitely fishy if you ask me. We just have to prove it. There’s something else; the toxicology reports came back-pretty fast, actually. Did Stacey use drugs?”

  “Never! Stacey would never use drugs or even smoke cigarettes. Why do you ask?” I was stunned.

  “Crystal Meth was found in his system. It was injected hypodermically.”

  “I can’t believe this. Stacey would never shoot anything up his arm.”

  I was so angry that hot tears were streaming down my face.

  “Were you able to get any information on the man that was stalking him?” I asked. I had given him the name and telephone number of my client and her husband. Stacey was positive that it was my client’s husband that was sending him that crap.

  “We made contact and he definitely has something to say. He’s coming up here next Tuesday to talk. We were able to pull a print from the note that was sent in the FedEx box, we ran the prints but no hits. So, when he gets here we’ll print him to see if they match. We just have to wait and see. Plus, we’re still going through the evidence that we collected from the crime scene. Something will turn up.”

  “Can you please call me after you interview him? I’ll see what else I can think of that may help,” I said, sounding defeated and feeling the same.

  “I most certainly will. Please know that we are going to do everything in our power to find out what happened to Stacey and bring the perpetrator to justice. Unfortunately, things aren’t like they are on CSI. It does take some time, but we’ll put the pieces together slowly but surely.”

  I felt completely helpless and deeply saddened after I got off the phone with the detective. I dialed Carlton’s cell number and was grateful that he picked up on the first ring.

  “Any news?”

  “Same shit. Doesn’t seem like they’re any closer to finding who did this. They may have a lead on the man that was stalking him. They’re going to interview him next week.” I told him through tears. It was still hard for me to believe that my best friend was dead. Everyday when I awoke, it was the first thing on my mind. It was like a rude awakening, a pain that nagged all day. I cried daily for my friend.

  “What the fuck they mean they gon’ interview him next week? Why they ain’t interviewing him now? Why haven’t they already?” he asked, sounding pissed off.

  “He said he doesn’t want him to lawyer up on them. They don’t want him to think that he is a suspect, I guess. I just know they have to find out who did this. I can’t rest until they do.” I didn’t want to tell him about the drugs for some reason and, of course, I left out Tyron Marks. I never mentioned anything about the relationship he had with Stacey. I knew that Carlton didn’t know anything about Tyron’s secret life. I was holding that card close. Something would surface that would connect Tyron and Stacey. I just knew it.

  “That’s bullshit. Look, can you meet me in North Carolina this Friday?” he asked.

  “Yeah, I don’t see why not. I need to get away from here as soon as possible,” I said happy that it was Tuesday and I would be seeing him by Friday.

  “Cool. I’ll send your flight information as soon as I get it. I can’t wait to see you. I have a surprise for you when you get here.” I couldn’t imagine what it could be, but I was excited at the thought.

  “Tell me what it is, please,” I begged.

  “Nope, not happening. I’ll hit you back with your flight info later. Love you, girl, and keep your head up, a’ight?”

  “Okay, talk to you later. Love you, too.” He made me feel so happy, yet I was so sad. I didn’t know what to do with myself for two days. I couldn’t wait to leave LA and escape the madness for a few days.

  I called Stacey’s sister, Joy, and gave her an update on my talk with the detective. Between her and me, we were in constant contact with the detectives working Stacey’s murder case and would continue to be until it was solved.

  Deon

  When we walked into the party, people were everywhere. The Post and Beam home was at the top of the hill, overlooking Hollywood, and was filled with beautiful people. The barely dressed women lounging around added to the overall ambiance. The first two women that caught my attention were twin sisters. Tall, beautiful, and chocolate with little dresses on that showed their long legs. They were amazingly gorgeous. They walked up to me and kissed me on both cheeks like they had been waiting for me to arrive, but I kept it moving. It was too soon to make a choice. I just might choose them both before the night was over, but until then, I wanted to see what I could see.

  I grabbed a glass of champagne from a waiter that was walking by and sipped as I took in the crowd. There were many athletes—football players, baseball players, basketball players—an assortment of men at the top of their game. I noticed a woman dancing in a bikini, rubbing up against one of my teammates. When he noticed me, he gave me the thumbs up and smiled. I could see the surprise in his eyes. They hardly ever saw me out.

  There were about three games of strip poker going on and women were walking around topless. This shit was wild! I was excited to be doing something different. I knew there was no turning back. I was ready to jump into my new lifestyle headfirst.

  Darryl’s crew went their own way as he and I explored the mansion. We went upstairs and passed by rooms with glass doors that showed all types of sex acts going on. This shit was beyond anything that I had ever seen. We stopped at one door and watched three women sexing each other like crazy. That shit was sexy. My dick immediately got hard. Watching them rub and kiss all over each other was very sensual. Something about being a voyeur was exciting. We watched for a good 10 minutes before Darryl opened the room door and went inside. My eyes were wide with surprise as I watched from my post outside. They welcomed him like they had been expecting him to enter the room. The Latina chick immediately unzipped his pants and started sucking his dick. He looked at me and started laughing. I couldn’t believe my eyes! This shit was beyond wild! As long as I’ve been in the league, I’d only heard about shit like this. I noticed the white girl, who had her head between the black girl’s legs since the moment we walked up, beckoning me to come in. When I didn’t move, the beautiful, caramel hued black girl and the heavily tanned white chick came up to the door and began to dance for me. They were rubbing up against each other, feeling on breasts and rubbing each other between the legs. The shit was hot as hell, but I declined and walked away. I wasn’t down for fucking in a room with a glass door. Plus, there was one man too many in there.

  I decided to sit down at one of the non strip poker tables to try my luck. I was playing with a professional heavyweight boxer, his date, and a couple of other people I didn’t recognize. More than halfway through the game, I saw Darryl coming down the stairs with a smile on his face cloaked by the three women who were still naked. The twins from earlier were draped around my seat giving me more attention and affection than I could ask for. They wanted to get it and I decided I was going to give it to them. I left the game the victor and was led by the twins to an enclosed cabana outside by the pool. We walked behind the curtains to find a fireplace and a large custom-made chaise patio bed with tall-lit candles around it. The warm glow from the fireplace and the candles set the mood.

  I sat on the bed and was immediately accosted by the twins kissing and feeling all over my body, and rubbing my dick through my jeans. Shit was getting pretty heated when in walked a five foot ten Latina with double Ds and long legs. She walked up behind the twins and began rubbing and grinding on them. I was surprised as hel
l, but thrilled. I wanted to see some kissing and licking between the ladies, and I would have been highly turned off to see two sisters in the act.

  I didn’t know any of their names and didn’t care to ever find out. One of the sisters pulled my dick out and they began taking turns sucking it. They were like a swarm of animals surrounding me. They were in heat and I was bound to put out the fire. I had a pocket full of condoms and a big dick that could handle all three of them for a long while. One thing was for sure, three to one was a foolproof way to bury the old Deon for good. This is definitely the life!

  Talise

  Sitting in the fifth pew of Los Angeles’ famed First AME church with Malachi by my side, I was looking forward to hearing the Word. I already felt the spirit flowing through me, and the pastor had just begun his sermon. Last night, as we were lying in bed, I felt better than I had in days. I was pleasantly surprised when Malachi suggested we go to church the next morning. I was happy that Malachi was opening his heart and letting God have his way with him. I needed to feel as close to God as possible with everything that had been going on in my life. Having Malachi on the same page spiritually was my goal, and I was getting closer and closer to reaching that goal as each day passed.

  It seemed that every time I went to church, the Lord would speak to me through the pastor. The sermons always hit home, but this time it was as if the Lord was sending his message directly to Malachi. I couldn’t stop the tears that were flowing down my cheeks. The sermon was about finding your way back to Jesus and letting him in your heart. He preached about how, when hard times and tragedy strikes in life and things go wrong, people may question and doubt God. This confirmed for me that God was everywhere. He was there during the conversation Malachi and I had on our first date, and he had been there with Malachi throughout all the hard times he’d faced. The Lord was definitely speaking, and the whole congregation was on their feet praising.

  The spirit was flowing through the church, and Malachi’s face was as tear stained as mine. We were on our feet praising God and shouting. When the preacher opened the altar for sinners to come and dedicate their lives to God, the choir began to sing Donnie McClurkin’s “We Fall Down” in a low hum as the preacher cajoled us sinners to the front of the church. Malachi was the first one up there and I was right behind him. This was the start to our new beginning. I knew we couldn’t go wrong with God on our side.

  After church, we met my parents for Sunday Brunch at I.Cugini in Santa Monica. I’d gone and visited my parents a few times since we never made it to their house the day we found out about Stacey. When I told them that I was pregnant, they couldn’t have been happier. I was blessed to have such supportive, non-judgmental parents.

  Brunch was delicious as it always is at I.Cugini. Being pregnant magnified every flavor 10 times. I was very grateful that not once had I experienced the morning sickness that I’d heard so much about. My stomach was still flat — not as flat as it used to be, but no one would be able to tell that I was pregnant. I was only three and a half months along and everyday was looking better than the previous. Malachi rubbed my knee under the table. He was so affectionate and loving that I couldn’t ask for anything more. He made me feel like I was the only woman in the room. I felt beyond special knowing that he loved me. I couldn’t think of spending my life with anyone other than him. It was as if we had a whirlwind romance. Things were taking off so fast, but I felt as if I’d known him forever, like we had done this all before.

  Malachi welcomed me into his world, his heart, and his soul. When I look at him, I can see straight through him. He is an open book to me, and I’m honored that he trusts me enough to be so emotionally open. He doesn’t hold back. When he looks at me, I see home in his eyes, I see security and love. It is the most amazing thing. My mother saw it when she first met him. Simone and Stacey saw it. It’s as if when he looks at me, the sun is shining directly on me. I glow under his stare.

  “So have you guys set a date yet?” my mother asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

  “No, not yet, I haven’t even thought about it with all that’s been going on,” I said honestly.

  “I’ve been thinking a lot about it, actually,” Malachi began. “I wanted to talk to you about this, Talise, but since your parents are here, there’s no better time than now.” He took a sip of his water and continued with his focus on my parents.

  “I couldn’t be happier having Talise in my life. You’ve raised an amazing woman, an amazing person. My life has been great in some aspects and awful in others, but when I first laid my eyes on Talise, I loved her. I know it’s a hard thing to understand, I don’t really understand it myself and that’s the thing, I’m not trying to understand it. I just knew I loved her the minute I saw her. From the first moment I looked into her eyes, she has not left my thoughts. I know things have moved very fast for us, but I would’ve married Talise last month, last week, today!” turning to me he said.

  “I want you to be my wife when you have my child. You deserve that and so does our child. I want to get married as soon as possible. We don’t need a big wedding. I say, let’s just do it! We can go up to Santa Barbara or wherever you want to go, just your parents and Simone and the both of us. That is all we need. I just dedicated my life to the Lord. We have to do this right.” Before he even finished, my mother and I were crying full-blown tears, and my father’s eyes were filled with pride.

  By the time we’d parted with my parents, we had set a plan for our wedding. Of course, my mother wasn’t having it and wanted to invite at least 50 of our closest family and friends. We decided to have the ceremony and small reception at Shutters on the Beach, a hotel in Santa Monica. If, by chance, we couldn’t get in within a month and a half, we would have it at Malachi’s house in Santa Barbara. I’d always wanted to get married on the beach, so either location was just fine with me. My mother was so excited. I could see it in her eyes. They insisted on paying for everything, although Malachi tried to protest, my father wasn’t having it. He said it was tradition for the bride’s family to pay for the wedding. I knew there was no talking my dad out of that one. I was so excited to finally be getting married. But more than that, I was excited to have found the man of my dreams and to be starting my life with him. I was filled with a mixture of happiness and sadness all at once. One of my best friends was no longer alive to share in my happiness, and that was a very bitter pill to swallow daily, along with my prenatal vitamins.

  Simone

  I arrived at the Charlotte, North Carolina Ritz Carlton Hotel, Friday at 1:30 in the afternoon. I was happy to see Carlton waiting in the hotel suite for me with a bottle of Veuve Clicquot champagne and strawberries. I was excited to see him and more than happy to be out of LA. As soon as I got into the room, he was all over me. I couldn’t wait to feel him inside of me again. We spent the rest of the afternoon inside, ordering room service, drinking champagne, and pleasing each other.

  “Let’s make a toast,” Carlton said, holding up his champagne glass.

  “Okay, what are we toasting to?” I asked, raising my glass with the plump strawberry resting at the bottom.

  “To your surprise,” he said. I had forgotten all about the surprise. I was too excited to see him.

  “Oh, yeah! To my surprise! Now what is it?” I asked, as we clinked our glasses together.

  “You’ll see at 7:00. We have to meet your surprise for dinner,” he said, kissing me on my forehead and heading out to the balcony to smoke a cigarette.

  “We’re meeting my surprise for dinner?” I asked, confused.

  “Yup! So get ready. You have less than an hour,” he said, blowing smoke out of his nose.

  “I thought you said you weren’t going to smoke around me, Carlton Banks. Now I’m locking you outside,” I joked as I pretended to close the balcony door.

  “You ain’t crazy,” he said, smiling. “I hardly ever smoke around you, and I’m outside now. So quit complainin’,” he said with a smile on his face, blowing smo
ke in my direction.

  As we sat down for dinner at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse, I was anxious to find out who was meeting us for dinner when a tall blond man whom I’d never seen before walked up to the table. Carlton stood and greeted the man by first name as I sat there, wishing I knew what in the hell was going on.

  “Simone, this is Rob Maynard of Maynard and Maynard Investigative Services.” I shook his hand as he took a seat opposite Carlton and me.

  “He has some good news for you, babe,” Carlton said, squeezing my knee. I still hadn’t said one word. I saw Rob Maynard’s mouth moving, but my mind was moving at such an impetuous pace, I couldn’t slow it down to register what he’d said.

  “Simone, did you hear him? He said he found your real mother,” Carlton said, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

  “What do you mean? What is he talking about, Carlton?” I asked, looking back and forth between the two men. I was very confused.

  “This is your surprise, babe! We found her and she is here.”

  “What? She is here in this restaurant?” I said, looking around, on the verge of tears. I didn’t know how to feel. I was so overwhelmed. I wasn’t expecting this in a million years.

  “No, no she isn’t here in this restaurant, Simone. She is here in Charlotte. This is where she lives,” Rob Maynard interjected.

  “I can’t believe this,” I said as a single tear rolled down my cheek.

  “I’m sorry, baby. Are you upset?” Carlton asked, looking perplexed.

  “No way! I’m happy. I just don’t know what to say. I’m numb,” I murmured, wiping tears from my face.

  “Does she want to see me? What did she say? Tell me everything.” I said, all at once. I was afraid to get excited, because I didn’t even know if she wanted to see me or not.