We Shouldn't and Yet...
Page 26
His eyebrows arch up and he chuckles. He holds up his beer and takes a swig. “That’s brutally honest. And harsh on your behalf.’’
“I don’t shy away from my screw ups and my short comings. That’s the only way I see to improve myself and get closer to what your daughter deserves. But another honest truth, sir. Even though she deserves better on a lot of accounts, I love her too much not to fight for her and our relationship. I haven’t lost my son for nothing and I really think she’s the love of my life. I hope you’ll get to know me with time and see that I have her best at heart even though I’m selfish and I’m fighting to keep her when maybe I should convince her that I’m not right for her.’’
He sighs and puts his beer down. He smiles at the house over his shoulder seeing his daughter and wife still there. “My family went through a lot over the past year. For Aideen it was worse, but she never complained. In fact, she wouldn’t unload and talk about Yann.’’
I nod. “I know. She told me.’’
“She trusts you a lot then.’’
“I think she does, but I can’t speak on her behalf.’’
“She doesn’t know this, but even though I loved Yann like he was family, I wasn’t fond of her with him.’’ I frown and straighten up. “I saw that their relationship was complicated, but my daughter wouldn’t say a thing about it. She was always keeping an eye on him and it had nothing to do with how she’s watching us over there.’’ He gestures to the house. “She seemed like a mother with her toddler. There was love and real attachment between her and Yann, anybody could see it, but it was nothing like you and her.’’
“You’ve picked up on this in under a minute?’’
“It’s obvious. And my wife told me a lot from her visit.’’
I mull over his words, glad to have another peek at what her past relationship was like. It hurts to know that she was deeply in love with someone else, but I know it was a difficult love, and very different from the love between a man and a woman should be. “She misses him. She often looks at a picture of them when they were in high school.’’
“He was her best friend since infancy. She’s also feeling guilt with his death, but it’s not placating her as strongly anymore. At first I thought it was because she moved away, but I think it’s because she’s opened up her heart again and this time around it’s to a strong relationship based on equality.’’
“You don’t sound like you’re that against me anymore.’’
He chuckles and stands up. I quickly jump to my feet. “I trust my daughter’s judgment. That doesn’t mean I’ll ever like how this started, but I can respect how it is today and where it’s going from here on now.’’
I smile and let out a deep breath, not even trying to hide it. “Thank you, sir. I…Just, thank you.’’
He nods and we both walk back to the house. So, meeting the parents isn’t that bad after all.
“But Jensen, I may be imposing, but if you ever hurt my daughter I can guarantee you that I’ll put you down without any issues.’’
I blink at the man walking next to me, at least a head shorter than me and gulp. I barely nod and almost trip on my own feet as we reach the door and walk in the house.
***
AIDEEN
It seems surreal to be in my old bedroom, lying on the bed under the thick pink sheets and watching Jensen stripping down to his sexy white boxers. He turns back to me and smiles as he crawls on the bed and gathers me in his arms.
“It’s a fucking shame that we’re sharing a bed but can’t do anything.’’ He runs his hands along my side and explores more slowly the small patch of exposed skin above the tiny shorts I have on.
“And I thought you were adventurous.’’
“I’m not exactly fond of thinking of your parents hearing us.’’ He shivers and I laugh at seeing the disgusted face he’s pulling. “Your parents are starting to warm up to me, I don’t want to ruin that.’’
“It’s a shame.’’ I kiss his chest and let my tongue lick a path from his collarbone to his pec. I bite his flat nipple and he growls, already getting hard. “Jensen—’’
“Don’t tempt me, beautiful. When I make love to you, I don’t want us to have to keep quiet if we don’t want to, I don’t want to hold back and I sure don’t want an audience. When I’m inside you, I want nothing but us to matter and that can’t happen here.’’
I crawl over him and nip at his lips, already getting wet. But he’s right and I love his words. He always says the perfect things to me and he doesn’t even have to think about it or rehearse. The man doesn’t realize how he makes me melt.
“Falling in love is the best thing that has ever happened to me, even though we shouldn’t have.’’
He brushes away my hair and lets his eyes take in my face, taking in every detail. “Even with everything that happened?’’
“Yes. We shouldn’t and yet…’’
“It was unavoidable.’’
We smile at each other and kiss again. It’s a soft, deep and sensual kiss and it reaches my heart, my insides and my core. Loving him isn’t a choice, isn’t going to be easy and isn’t without obstacles and pain. Loving him is beautiful, sensual, bright and makes me feel alive, more alive than I’ve ever been. In time, things will get back into place and in the meantime we’re there for each other. I’m his anchor and he’s mine.
Two years later…
JENSEN
When I look at her only clothed in my t-shirt that stops mid-thigh as she flips pancakes I don’t only get hard, I also feel my fucking heart swelling so much it feels like my whole chest is too small for the damn thing. Even two years later she affects me like in the early days.
I’m aware that I have the stupidest smile on my face as I stare at her moving effortlessly in my kitchen with her back to me. Honestly, I barely recognize myself sometimes. The fuck up who needed to drink his issues away, who would shag anything that moves to push away my demons, is gone.
I never thought I would ever deserve this happiness and sometimes, most of the time, I still don’t. But I have this woman, this beautiful, sexy, and tender woman and I will do anything to keep her in my life.
I went against my own son to be with her. I’ve changed to be worthy of her.
She glances over her slim shoulder and smiles at me. It reaches her hazel eyes and like always when I see how happy I make her it’s like someone stole my breath.
“What?’’ she asks, a barely contained laugh in her voice.
Instead of answering with words, I stalk to her and grab her, turning her around to face me so I can taste her lips again. And since she started showing I put my hands on her round belly with our daughter.
My tongue slips in her mouth and I taste the orange juice she had earlier. She wraps her arms around me and groans in my mouth before she pulls away.
“I’m too big to get really close now.’’
I smile fondly at her and drop my eyes to her stomach. “You’re perfect, beautiful. You’ve never been more perfect.’’
She huffs and rolls her eyes, but soon enough her bright smile reappears. She brings her hands over mine on her stomach and my smile gets bigger when the morning light catches on her wedding band. Last night we celebrated our one year wedding anniversary and ended in bed with some amazing orgasms.
“She’s moving a lot this morning. Feel her?’’ She moves my hands a little and then I feel my daughter kicking.
Emotions well inside me like always when I feel my baby girl moving. I never thought I could fall in love without meeting someone, but she’s the proof of that. Our little miracle.
“I can’t believe I’m going to have a daughter. It’s going to drive me fucking crazy when she hits puberty.’’ I chuckle, already picturing myself following her when she goes on her first date with a boy.
Aideen squeezes my hands before she puts one on my face to bring my mouth to hers for a deep kiss that leaves me hard as a rock and panting.
“I can�
�t wait to see that.’’ Her sexy little smile and the sparks in her eyes make me feel lighter still and I’m ready to forego breakfast to devour my deliciously tempting wife when my phone rings on the kitchen counter.
I sigh and pull away. “I swear this fucking phone is a pain.’’ I shake my head and grab it, checking the ID quickly before I answer. At the name displayed on the screen my annoyance vanishes and my stupid smile, the kind of smile like only a truly happy man has plastered on his face, comes back. “Hey, Hal. Still on for lunch today?’’
My life is back on track and I have everything I never dreamed on having, but needed like oxygen.
I have a wonderful wife who I love more than life itself.
We’re going to have a baby girl.
And my grown up son is back in my life, happy for Aideen and me and eager to meet his sister.
Life has been tough and I thought that’s all it was, but now I know that life is also made of more if only I gave myself the chance to live it.
Author’s babbling
As always, the first person I have to thank is Wendy, my friend and blogger at Bare Naked Words. Thank you for your time, your kind words, encouragement and for being there whenever I need your help. Every time you find a way to calm my nerves when I’m ready to turn into a neurotic author ready to trash everything from my notes to my ugly draft.
Then, I have to thank every and all bloggers who are continuously there to help promote my cover reveal, teasers and new release. It’s amazing the time you spend helping us, authors. Your passion for books is inspiring and always makes me want to write more, better. Without you and your support I wouldn’t be able to get the word out when I have a new book or when I have a new cover to share. Never think your work, kindness and messages are overlooked or taken for granted.
Finally, I want to thank you, readers. You, right now, reading these few parting words, you make my dream possible. I hope this isn’t the last you read of me and I’m crossing my fingers in hope that you enjoyed this book. I can’t wait for my next book to land on your e-reader and/or bookshelf. Keep reading and never underestimate how happy it makes us authors, knowing that you read us, tell others about a book you like and interact with us. A thousand ‘thank you’s’ can’t be enough.
About the author
Stephanie Witter, in her twenties, lives in France where she comes up with book ideas on her laptop, notebook or phone. When she’s not writing the day away, she likes visiting museums or shopping to add another nail polish to her already huge collection. She’s also unable to resist the appeal of new books, even when she knows she can’t possibly have the time to read yet another one. She’s happy to have a to-read pile so high she can never put a dent into it even if she tries her best.
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