No Filter (No Shame Series Book 1)

by Nora Phoenix

  A mighty shiver went through Josh, as if he’d been shocked by electricity. Had he grasped what Noah was offering?

  “I won’t disappoint you,” Josh said, barely audible.

  Noah took another deep breath. Yeah, Josh had gotten the message.

  5

  Noah had to balance in front of the door to the guest bedroom, leaning on one crutch and dangling the other from his arm so he had a hand free to open the door. Little things like that frustrated him to no end since they were so fucking complicated. At least the pain was almost gone, as was usually the case after sex. Release, he euphemistically had called it at first, and they still used that code word at times. It seemed the physical act of orgasming and the endorphins it released in his body brought relief of his pain at the same time.

  “I’m awake,” Indy spoke up, his face illuminated by the soft light filtering through the curtains. They didn’t have blackout curtains anywhere in the house, as Josh couldn’t stand the dark.

  Indy was lying on his back, his face slightly tilted toward the door. He must’ve cleaned his face, as all traces of the makeup he’d been wearing were gone. He looked so young, so innocent. Fuck, was the kid even legal? His date of birth had put him at twenty-one, but Noah wondered if it was accurate.

  “How are you feeling?” he asked, almost reflexively. He bumped the door open with his crutch and came farther into the room.

  “Okay.”

  “How’s the pain?”

  “It’s much better with the painkillers. Not dizzy or sick. My ribs still hurt, but it’s doable.”

  Noah made his way to his bedside. “Can you sit up and move to the middle?” he asked. “I can’t do this standing up on my crutches.”

  Indy slowly sat up and with careful movements scooted over to the middle of the bed. Noah lowered himself on the bed, dropping his crutches on the floor. He’d put on some shorts, so he’d have a pocket to carry his light, as well as a T-shirt. He couldn’t show up half-naked in Indy’s room. He pulled out his light, turned it on.

  “Follow the light please.”

  His eyes were brown now, Noah realized with surprise. Had he been wearing colored contacts? Noah had seen he’d been wearing contacts when he’d been brought in, but had assumed they were regular ones. He’s going through a lot of trouble to hide his identity.

  He checked Indy’s tracking, then his pupils. He responded well, was alert.

  “Any dizziness, nausea?”

  “Nah.”

  “Did you sleep?”

  “For a spell. I’m sure I woulda slept better if you guys hadn’t kept me awake…”

  Noah halted in his movements. Swallowed. “You heard us.”

  “It was kinda hard to miss. The walls aren’t that thick, and you were right next door.”

  Noah switched off his light, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness. “I’m sorry,” he said.

  Indy crossed his legs, resting his hands on his knees. “Are we talking about the fact that I overheard you guys having sex or the fact that the two of you are together in the first place?”

  That was the multimillion-dollar question, wasn’t it? What the hell had he been apologizing for? Fuck, he was making a complete mess of things tonight. There was no way he could answer this question without revealing way more of himself than he was ready to.

  The funny thing was that he had never wanted to explain himself more than right now. He wanted Indy to understand why he was with Josh, how much they needed each other. But Indy wasn’t ready for what Noah had to say. Hell, he was hopped up on painkillers. Hardly the best time for a heart-to-heart. Plus, Noah himself wasn’t ready to talk. He hadn’t figured it all out, what it meant, what Indy meant, what it said about him and his sexuality. Plus, there was always Josh to consider. Josh, who had to come first, way before what Noah himself wanted.

  He sighed, then grabbed his crutches and lifted himself up. “Hang on a sec, I’ll be right back.” He made his way to the guest bathroom and took a small box and a bottle from the medicine cabinet, stuffing both in his pocket. He limped back, where Indy was motionless on the bed.

  “Here,” Noah said, taking them both out and throwing them on Indy’s bed. “Earplugs for your convenience for tonight and tomorrow night. And after that, you can use the Benadryl. Two tablets will get you drowsy enough to sleep through anything. It doesn’t interact with your pain meds. There’s a water bottle on your night table. Don’t take them the first two nights, though, as I need to be able to assess you for possible brain issues.”

  Indy lifted his eyebrows. “Were you guys gearing up for another round right now or were you planning on me staying longer than one night?”

  Noah turned around, making his way to the door. “Both,” he said.

  He couldn’t look at Indy now, didn’t want to see how his words affected him. If he saw Indy’s pain, he’d crumble. Still, he had to offer something to help him understand that he wasn’t fucking Josh to rub it in.

  With his back toward Indy and the door knob in his hand, he said, “Sex helps with the pain.”

  He didn’t wait for an answer, but firmly closed the door behind him. His cock was painfully hard, and he was pretty sure Indy had seen it. It has to be because of the sex with Josh, right? And because you know you’re gonna get more. Give more, he corrected. This is about Josh's pleasure, not yours. And his cock had better get that memo, preferably soon.

  He made his way into the bedroom to the sound of someone jerking off. Josh had taken his order seriously. He was spread out on the bed, fisting his cock and panting with effort, his head hung back in abandon. Noah stood for a minute, watching him. Fuck, Josh was so sexy when he was pleasuring himself.

  Physically, they were completely different. Whereas he himself had a muscular torso and strong arms—a necessary compensation for his weak legs—Josh was lean and toned all over. And his skin was soft, almost feminine, though his beautiful cock proved beyond a doubt he was a man. As his eyes adjusted to the dark, Noah saw Josh's dick juicing with anticipation.

  Josh stopped and opened his eyes, slightly raising his head. “Are you gonna stand there and watch me, or are you gonna make good on your promise?”

  Noah dropped his crutches, whipped off his shirt. “Think you’re ready?”

  He removed his shorts and boxers with some effort. His cock jumped free with joy, standing erect and ready for action. Too bad it wasn’t going to get any, not if everything went according to plan.

  Josh sat up, looked at Noah and smiled. “Hell, yeah. I’m not even gonna need two minutes.”

  Noah turned sideways and let himself fall facedown on the bed, his mouth directly above his lover’s crotch. He blew a soft breath, saw with great satisfaction that a mere waft affected Josh.

  “And why is that?” he asked, blowing again.

  Josh shivered, clenching his teeth. “Because the thought of the reward alone was enough to almost make me come.”

  “I’m glad to see you are sufficiently motivated, as this is a onetime offer.” He slid out his tongue and gave the gorgeous stiff member in front of him a big lap, like he would a lollipop.

  “Oh, trust me, I’m motivated.”

  “Let’s start the clock then,” Noah said. “Two minutes and counting.”

  He didn’t wait, but dropped his mouth down on Josh's cock, taking him in as far as he could. Oh, he knew how to suck cock by now. He’d learned from the best.

  Josh let out a loud groan and bucked against his mouth, grabbing his head with both hands. With one hand tight around the base, Noah sucked hard. He pushed the foreskin back with his tongue, lapped at the slit before tonguing it. He went crazy when Josh did that to him, figured he’d return the favor.

  “Oh, fuck!” Josh groaned, thrusting his hips to get more of his cock in Noah’s mouth.

  Josh's salty fluids coated Noah’s tongue and mouth, and he kept sucking as if his life depended on it. Sucking cock had taken a little getting used to at first, but he loved seeing the pl
easure it brought Josh. He’d made a sport out of getting his lover’s long cock as far in as he could, succeeding in getting it a little deeper every time. Also something he’d learned from a master cock sucker.

  He’d never swallowed. For some reason, he’d always pulled back at the last minute and let Josh come over his hands or wherever. It had felt like a transition he wasn’t ready to make, but that had to change. Josh deserved for him to be all in.

  Noah relaxed his throat, took him in as far as he could. Josh's constant stream of moans fueled his desire to make this spectacular.

  Josh gasped and shivered, sending tremors that vibrated through his cock. His head thrashed on the mattress, and he bucked his hips, seeking more fiction.

  Are you really gonna do this? He pushed the thought out of his head. I want to do this. I have to do this. I fucking owe it to Josh. Dammit, Josh had gotten hurt because of him, and Noah had to do everything he could to make it right.

  Noah came up for air, sucking in some much-needed oxygen, then took Josh in, farther than he’d ever thought possible.

  “Noah! Shit…I’m coming!”

  Josh's hands shoved Noah back, warning him of the impending release, but Noah dug in, only pulling back slightly to avoid choking.

  Josh flexed his back, then made a final thrust in Noah’s mouth. “Oh…Yes!” he cried out, shooting his cum down Noah’s throat.

  Noah’s mouth filled with a creamy, slightly salty substance. He swallowed, kept sucking and licking till Josh relaxed.

  Wow, that was easier than he’d expected. He smacked his lips at the flavor. It was okay, actually. Pretty neutral, really, and not all that different from the taste of precum.

  He’d done it. And fucking hell, so had Josh.

  Noah pulled back, dropping Josh's now flaccid cock on his stomach to look at the clock. Josh turned his head at the same time, his forehead clammy. His breaths were slowing down.

  “I did it.” The sheer triumph in Josh's voice touched Noah deep.

  “Technically, I did it, but yes. You made the deadline. Congratulations.” He winced as he rolled on his side, maneuvering his stump out of the way.

  Josh rolled on his side too, so they were facing each other. He cupped Noah’s cheek with one hand, caressing. “Was it…okay for you?”

  The question was quintessential Josh. He was always concerned about Noah.

  He grabbed the hand stroking his cheek, kissed it softly. “I loved it,” he said. “I love seeing you come.”

  Josh smiled, a sweet and boyish smile.

  “Don’t you want to know your reward?” Noah teased.

  “I’m almost afraid to ask,” Josh whispered.

  “Why?”

  Josh pulled back his hand, wrapped his hands around Noah’s neck and snuggled close to him. With his mouth against Noah’s neck, he said, “It’s okay if you changed your mind.”

  No. He would not change his mind. He grabbed Josh's head, pulled him back for a hard kiss. “I haven’t and I won’t. But there’s one condition: you have to claim your price. The ball is in your court now. I won’t offer again, and I will not fuck you again until you’ve collected. You get me?” he said with his forehead against Josh's.

  Josh nodded gamely. Noah kissed him again. “Now, would you please, please donate a minute of your time to make me come so we can get some sleep? Mouth-fucking your gorgeous dick has left me throbbing, and since I warned you I won’t fuck you again until you claim me, I’m left hanging, so to speak.” He pushed his solid cock against Josh's stomach for good measure.

  Josh laughed softly. “It would be my pleasure,” he said. Seconds later, Noah’s cock was engulfed in Josh's sweet, sucking mouth. It didn’t even take a minute. But when Noah came, it wasn’t Josh he was thinking about.

  Indy slept most of the day. He’d only taken the earplugs after hearing Josh and Noah finish their second round, and the complete silence had helped him find a deep sleep. Noah had woken him every three hours—how the fuck does he manage that without suffering from severe sleep deprivation?—and had been content with how Indy had responded.

  He’d slept and slept and slept and in between, he’d lain in bed, resting. How much of his headache and pain had been caused by that fall and how much by sheer exhaustion? He hadn’t been sleeping well the week before—and that was the fucking understatement of the year. His diet had been equally crappy, since he was running out of money, and cooking was impossible in his car.

  Josh had brought mouth-watering food. First a fluffy omelet with spinach and some kind of salty cheese, then homemade chicken soup, and for dinner a turkey sandwich. Indy had been ravenous, and every single bite had been scrumptious.

  Indy assumed Josh was the cook. His face had displayed an adorable I-really-hope-you-like-it look every time he’d brought Indy something. He was like a puppy, eager to please, even after Indy had kissed his boyfriend. Apparently, Josh was the gracious and forgiving type. Thank fuck for that.

  When he’d crawled his ass out of bed to pee, Indy had stumbled into Noah in the hallway. He’d looked wicked hot in his dark blue scrubs, not a trace of tiredness on his face. How he could be ready to work a shift after so little sleep, and look damn sexy at that, was beyond comprehension. He was hotter than McDreamy, that one. Same smoldering bedroom eyes, even if his were green, and not Patrick Dempsey’s blue.

  Indy himself had looked like crap, judging by the quick peek in the bathroom mirror. Pale as shit, dark circles under his eyes, and sunken cheeks. Fuck, he really had lost too much weight. No wonder his last run had been so slow and gruesome. He’d chalked it up to his broken arm, but clearly his body had been rebelling against the whole concept of running on too little fuel.

  He’d needed this time of rest and recuperation. Not only for his body—though clearly he’d asked too much of himself physically—but also for his mind. Not having to worry about where to sleep, what to eat, how to stay safe and unseen, his mind was more relaxed than it had been in a long time. And it was all thanks to Josh and Noah and the uncanny way they’d been able to gain his trust.

  Too bad these gorgeous specimens were together, because both seriously tempted him to break his dry spell. You’re pathetic. As if either of them would ever want you. Look at them, what could you possibly have to offer them? Even if they weren’t together, they’d never want you. He exhaled slowly. Of course they’d never want him. Didn’t mean he couldn’t dream about it.

  Plus, hearing them fuck had made him horny. Like, seriously horny. He’d not been able to hear everything, of course, but Josh had been quite…vocal at the end, so Indy had enjoyed a live audio show of him coming. After that, Noah had let out a moan that suggested it had been his turn, and the whole thing had left Indy rock hard and trembling.

  He’d tried to remedy that, but first of all, jerking off with your left hand when you were a dominant righty was hellish. And when your ribs throbbed and you had a blinding headache, it was damn near impossible. Finally, he’d put in the earplugs and forced himself to relax and fall asleep. He’d gone without sex or even jerking off for a long, long time, so a few weeks more wouldn’t kill him. He’d been more surprised by his reawakened sex drive than anything else, had figured it was a permanent lost cause.

  After dining on that mouth-watering turkey sandwich—Josh had put some kind of mayo on it that was the best Indy had ever tasted, creamy with a hint of mustard—he had wondered if he had to leave. Noah hadn’t specified how long he could stay, had he? Was he wearing out his welcome by staying another night? Indy had debated it for all of two minutes, then told himself he was fucking crazy for even considering leaving and went right back to sleep.

  One more day. Just one more day.

  Noah didn’t check on him again till after midnight. Indy assumed he’d been working as he was still wearing his scrubs. And his leg.

  “How have you been today?” Noah asked, lowering himself onto the bed. Soft light was spilling in from the hallway, illuminating his face. He looked lik
e he was happy to see Indy, even though he was likely in pain again, as he was rubbing his right leg.

  “Good. Still tired.”

  “Josh said you slept most of the day. Rest is crucial for a complete recovery. He also said you ate well, which is a good sign. You could use the calories. Did you take your meds?”

  He brought out his little flashlight, checked Indy’s pupils.

  “Yeah. They make me loopy. It’s hard to think.”

  Noah smiled. “They tend to do that. Josh said you were funny and a little loose-lipped. You can switch to over-the-counter painkillers in a day or two.”

  Loose-lipped. Fuck. Indy swallowed. What had he revealed?

  Noah covered his small hand, squeezed it. Indy’s heart skipped a beat. Noah was touching him. He waited for his body to react, but the expected fear and panic never showed up. Instead, there was a sense of excitement, his heart rate speeding up and his skin tingling.

  “Indy, whatever secrets you have are safe with us.”

  “Doctor-patient confidentiality?” he asked.

  “No. It’s called trust, loyalty, and friendship.”

  Indy studied Noah’s kind green eyes. “I haven’t experienced much of that.”

  Their eyes held. Noah was reading him again, his hand still covering Indy’s. He was sitting so close, their legs touching and holding hands, yet Indy didn’t feel even the slightest urge to pull away.

  “Josh and I have been through hell together, and we’re both still finding our way back,” Noah said, his expression serious. “All we have is each other. Because we are both emotionally screwed up, we’ve learned to be honest about what we feel. I know, it’s a daring concept for guys to talk about feelings, but we’ve had to. Josh and I… We’ve been each other’s lifelines. We know that you have baggage, but we’re not judging. Shit, we’re both carrying way too much around ourselves. And you don’t know us very well, not yet, at least. But we have your back. Whatever you are dealing with, whether you want to talk about it or not, you can trust us.”