Haunted

by Merrill, R. L.

  Jade shifted his legs. I could breathe a little easier and the shaking stopped...but then he started scratching himself and that was it.

  “Uh, guys? I seem to have a problem here?”

  I heard groaning and Star’s snoring stopped. He popped his head up to become face to face with me. His eyes grew wide and then he started laughing, loudly.

  “Star! What the hell!?”

  Jade groaned and started to roll over.

  “Ow! Jade!”

  When he moved he now had me completely pinned, his feet tangled in my hair. My feet were under his back and tangled in his hair.

  “Ah! I can’t move! Who’s pulling my hair,” he shouted.

  Mage sat up and when he saw our predicament, he rolled off the couch cracking up on the floor next to Star.

  “You guys aren’t helping here,” I tried to get out, but I was quickly losing air. “Jade!! I can’t move either! Will you two hyenas please give us a hand!?”

  Finally Mage and Star began the process of untangling feet from hair, none too gently I’m afraid. Then Jade further pained me by stepping in the middle of my back to get up. I cried out as my spine bowed under his weight.

  “Oh no! Jaylene, are you ok? I’m so sorry! I’m really a sound sleeper, I had no idea!” Jade tried to help me roll over and the peeling sound of my face becoming unstuck from the couch made them all wince.

  “Jesus! This is bad. How the hell are we supposed to tell Devon we all slept on his girlfriend?”

  I rolled my eyes as the guys all burst out laughing. “Ha ha, very funny. At least I can tell him you guys all suck!” That made the snickering worse. “Ok, not suck, you guys are all hair pullers and face smashers and pillow stealers!”

  The laughing stopped.

  “That might not go over too well for us.” Jade sounded nervous.

  I slowly sat up knowing I was a wreck. My back was killing me and I felt like the imprint of the leather was never going to come off. My skin hurt like I had an awful sunburn. I held my head in my hands and groaned loudly.

  “What can we do, Jaylene? Are you going to be ok?” Star was rubbing my back while the other two nervously cleaned up the scene of the crime.

  “I’ll be fine. I’m going to go do some yoga, maybe a run on the treadmill and a shower. When I go home tonight I’ll see if Mackenzie can work on me for a while.” I turned to look at Star whose concern was bleeding off him. “Did you know Mackenzie was a massage therapist?”

  His eyes flared at that. “Could that woman get any hotter? Really? Damn! Hey, Jaylene. I wanted to bring her something nice when we go tonight, that is, if I’m still invited?”

  I elbowed him. “Of course you are! Just because we’ve slept together doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”

  He slapped his hand against his forehead and fell back against the couch. I couldn’t help but giggle. It was obvious they were all nervous about us sleeping together.

  “Guys, how about we all go work out together and then I’ll make you breakfast? Mage, what time are you and Jade taking off?”

  He shrugged. “I was going to call my mama and have her come pick us up this afternoon sometime. Why? Oh, I bet you need a ride with your stuff, huh? Hey Jade? Why don’t you call Rudy and have him come get us in the Hummer so there’s room for Jaylene’s stuff?”

  He nodded. “I’m on it.”

  We all headed down to the weight room after quick runs to the bathroom for morning business and tooth-brushing. Star and Mage hit the weights and Jade and I ran alongside each other on the treadmills. Music was blaring from the speakers and we were all just in our own worlds. I realized I still wasn’t used to all the skin. The guys were all shirtless, but it didn’t feel as weird after our night of bonding. I felt a lot closer to them, even though I still didn’t know Mage and Jade as well as Star. They’d all opened up to me and I was grateful for that.

  I worked up a good sweat and then went over to an area with mats on the floor to stretch out. I stifled a laugh when I realized how hard they were trying not to watch me. Ok, they didn’t look at me like a sister or friend, but they were really trying to. I guess you couldn’t take the rock star completely out of them. Mage took my place on the other treadmill and he and Jade fell into step together. Jade had pulled his long hair back in a hair tie. Mage’s was sweaty and plastered against his back. Star’s short hair was sticking out all over. And while they were all beautiful in their own way, they had really won me over with their boyish charms and goofy sense of humor. Part of me was loath to think of them in their real element. As rock stars they probably weren’t this accessible.

  “So guys, I have another question.” They looked curious but concerned. I laughed, “It’s not a huge deal. I’m just wondering how much different you are when you are doing the rock star thing. Because you guys are so much fun to hang out with, I just wonder if when my contract is up and you guys go back to being big time, how different are you going to be?”

  They looked at each other and I thought I detected a note of sadness.

  Star shared, “I don’t know that we are really that different. We don’t try to put on an act I don’t think? But we don’t really share our nerdy side. Makes it rough with the fans when they think we are still nerds.”

  Jade was smiling now. “And if they want to think we’re about what our music is about, I guess I don’t mind.”

  I rolled my eyes. I didn’t want to know the answer to the next question, but I thought I’d better ask. “Do you think you guys will ever settle down with someone or do you still like the chase?”

  Mage frowned. “I think what you’re really wondering is will Devon settle down or if he’s still going to be chasing skirt.”

  I frowned and shook my head. “No, I don’t think I’m asking that. I wouldn’t want you guys to speak for him. And only time will tell what happens with Devon. No, I’m curious about you guys.”

  He was still frowning, but he looked like he was deep in thought.

  Star said, “I hope to settle down. I don’t need anymore empty relationships. I don’t want that life anymore.” He seemed determined to stay well and I was determined to help him however I could.

  “I think you’ll have what you want, Star. And I’ll be here, however you need me.”

  He smiled and winked at me.

  Jade sighed. “If I can find the perfect woman I’ll settle down. I just don’t really know what I want. I can’t see past getting this album done right now so I don’t know what the hell is going to happen to me. Or what’s going to happen to us.”

  Mage cut in. “Dude, we’re going to be fine. We’ll do the album and then we’ll figure it out. I don’t think we’re done yet. We’ve still got a lot of music left in us I think. As for settling down?” He got a sly smile on his face. “My woman is out there. She just don’t know she’s my woman yet. When it’s time, I will grab her up and we’ll have about twenty kids together. I can’t wait to be a dad.”

  I giggled. “I can totally see you being a dad. You’ll be a good one. But twenty kids is a lot to ask of a woman. I’m assuming you meant one woman?”

  He laughed. “Yeah, one woman. Ok, maybe ten kids. Is that too much?”

  “I don’t know, the thought of giving birth scares the shit out of me so I am probably not the right person to ask.”

  Jade raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you want to have kids?”

  I concentrated on stretching. I wasn’t sure how to answer that. “I don’t know. It’s scary. I am only just now doing a good job of taking care of myself. I don’t know if I’d make a good mom, I wouldn’t know what to do with a baby. I love kids...other people’s kids.”

  The truth was I was terrified of ever having kids. What if I screwed up? My own mother couldn’t handle it, how did I know if I’d be any better? And with the upbringing I had? I didn’t ever want to put a kid through what I went through, the constant judgments and the pressures. I didn’t think I was that kind of person, but I didn’t want to gamble
a child’s life on it.

  Jade shook his head. “You’d be a great mom, Jaylene! Just look at how well you take care of us!”

  I laughed. “Yeah, but you guys are already grown ups with healthy egos. A child? I don’t know. They are so fragile. I wouldn’t want to screw them up.”

  They all snickered and Jade said, “You’ve spent over a week with us and you don’t think we’re screwed up? Maybe your counseling skills are a little rusty.”

  I laughed, but it was shallow. He was right about my skills. Before I started wallowing in self-pity, I decided I better go shower.

  “I’m going to go clean up. What do you want for breakfast?”

  They all stopped and got starving caveman looks on their faces.

  “Aw, Jaylene. Your breakfast is awesome. Can we have French Toast again?” Jade was giving me his best pouty face.

  I shook my head and laughed. “Of course you can. I’ll be down in a few.”

  They fell into a conversation of grunts and I knew it was time to go.

  I couldn’t shake this bad feeling I had as a result of our conversation. I turned on the shower and waited for the hot water. Once it was ready, I stepped under the stream and lost myself in the past.

  “Hey Dad?” I had just gotten my thesis back from my professor and the committee had given me an A, cementing my honors status for graduation.

  “What is it, Jaylene?” He was in his study working on some plans for his next trip out of the country. Being a defense contractor meant long trips overseas to sometimes unforgiving locales and when he came home he was grouchy and usually sick. I took a deep breath and handed him my portfolio.

  He looked over my professor’s comments. I waited impatiently, hoping this time maybe he’d finally be proud of me. “Well, they gave you good marks, but I still don’t understand why this topic has any merit.” I’d chosen to review the effects of divorce on academic achievement in girls. My professor thought it was a great topic, something that schools should be looking at as well as courts when making decisions about custody. I’d spent two years putting the research and interviews together.

  “If a person chooses to be successful they will be, regardless of their background. I get tired of hearing people make excuses for themselves.” He handed the paper back to me and went back to his work. I choked back a sob.

  I nodded and said quietly, “Thanks. Sorry to bother you.” I turned and hurried back to my room, hoping I could hold back the tears until I was in the sanctuary of my room.

  I wiped at my face, realizing that I’d been crying. I finished cleaning myself up and tried to chase that memory away. I was glad I was getting away from this place for a couple of days. I needed to be back in my current sanctuary and get a hold of myself.

  When I finished and went back to my room, I saw I had two texts. The first one, from Mackenzie, said:

  Hey gorgeous! Just wondered what time you were coming back tonight? I’m cooking tomorrow, but I could cook tonight, too, if you want. I just can’t wait for you to get back! ! ! Troy said he’s taking the weekend off since you’ll be here, so he’s leaving around midnight tonight and won’t be back until Monday. So hurry! ! ! !

  I smiled. I missed her as much as she missed me. It meant so much to me to have a friend like her. She put up with a lot from me and had been so supportive with this latest venture. I started to think about what Star could bring her and remembered how much she liked the poppet drawings by an artist named Clay down at the French Market. Perhaps he had a disguise good enough to get us in and out of there before we went to the shop. I answered her:

  Not sure what time I’ll be there, I have to check with Star. Wondering if you might be up for sharing some of your massage therapy technique? I kind of spent the night on the couch with the guys and I’m a mess.

  That was likely to get a lively response from her. The next text was from Devon. I felt my cheeks heat up.

  Hey beautiful. I’m missing you something fierce. I hate it that I won’t see you until tomorrow. Everything ok?

  I texted back:

  I woke up a mess, got sweaty, took a shower, now need to feed the cavemen. Missing you too. My pillow still smells like you. Think anyone would notice if I carried it around with me? Looking forward to getting your smell all over my pillows at my flat. Everything ok with you?

  I grabbed for my clothes and was getting dressed when he texted back:

  Why did you wake up a mess? Sorry I missed the sweaty and the shower. I’ll get my smell all over anything you want me to.

  I debated telling him I slept with his band mates last night, but I thought perhaps that wasn’t information for a text.

  I woke up on the couch. Too much Rock n Roll High School and Twenty Questions. Did you sleep ok?

  I hoped he didn’t have another nightmare. I went in the bathroom to fix my hair and when I came back there was this text:

  That couch is not comfortable. I didn’t get much sleep, but I wrote a new song. It’s a sequel to ‘Mystikal Stick.’ It’s called Magic Pole. I think you’ll love it. I don’t think I want to know about Twenty Questions, I’m assuming that was Jade’s idea? Going to Daryl’s now. I’ll text when I’m done. Tomorrow can’t get here soon enough.

  I was beginning to feel the same. Tomorrow seemed forever away.

  Tomorrow actually begins at 12:01 a. m. , which is only 13 hours from now. If we were being technical about things. That gives you a window. Hope Daryl’s goes ok. Tell him to take care of his ticker.

  I had to get back downstairs before the cavemen resorted to cannibalism. When I found them they were actually quite civilized, sitting at the bar eating fruit and drinking coffee.

  “Sorry for the delay, I’ll have your French Toast out in a jiffy.”

  They all smiled graciously at me and I continued into the kitchen. I made quick work of getting them fed. They were even more gracious when I came back into the bar with the food.

  “So Marcus said Sherry has us booked into the studio starting on the 2nd. That only gives us a week to finish writing. I hope we’ll be done.”

  I wordlessly placed the food platters in front of them and tried to process what Jade was telling the guys. I had just over a week. Then Devon would be gone to L.A. Being here with him was fantasy. Soon he’d be back in his reality and I’d be back at my shop doing my thing. What did that mean for us?

  “Jaylene, did you hear me?” Star was looking at me, concern on his face.

  I shook my head and tried to smile. “Sorry, just daydreaming. What did you need?”

  He frowned, not buying my smile. “I was asking if you thought about what I could bring Mackenzie?” This I could certainly help out with. My smile was devious this time and he leaned forward onto the bar. “You’ve got a plan, don’t you?”

  I nodded. “You got any of those disguises Sherry talked about?”

  He frowned. “Disguises? Oh! You mean for going out? Yeah, I can work something. What’s the plan?”

  I told him where we needed to go and for what. He was on board with the plan and he ran upstairs to pack. Rudy was supposed to be over around 3:00 to pick us up so we had time to run out and do a little shopping.

  We invited Mage and Jade to come with but they opted to stay and try to write, obviously stressing about their deadline. I was stressing about it, too, but there was nothing I could do. When they left I’d have to just deal with it and go on. I tried to convince my heart that I could handle getting closer to Devon knowing he was leaving.

  I went into the kitchen to finish cleaning up the mess. Mage helped me carry the dishes in and quietly washed them while I dried.

  “Devon’s different than us; I know you know that.” His words startled me.

  I continued drying, not looking at him. “Ok. I know he doesn’t share your boy band fantasy.”

  Mage laughed. “That’s not what I’m talking about, but I see you. I know you like to hide behind jokes, but I see you.”

  I turned on him with an eyebro
w raised. “And just what do you see?” I tried a teasing tone, but his look was dead serious.

  “I see how you looked out there when Jade was talking about going back to L.A.”

  I shrugged and busied my hands with drying the dishes so he wouldn’t see them shaking. “And how did I look, Mage?”

  He kept handing me dishes and I gratefully accepted them. I could feel him watching though, and it wasn’t helping me stay calm.

  “Just because he’s going back to L.A. don’t mean this can’t work. You can travel and tattoo, right? Things work themselves out.”

  I scoffed. “My business is here. This bit of time with you guys is an exception. I plan on going back to my shop on May 1st and it’s back to business. Devon’s got to do what he’s got to do, right?”

  He said, “Mmm, hmm. But that doesn’t mean it has to be back to old business with him, if you get what I’m saying.”

  I put down my towel and looked at him. “Just what are you trying to say, Mage?”

  He put the dishes down and turned on me, taking a step closer. “I’m saying that just because he’s going back to L.A. doesn’t mean he’ll go back to the L.A. lifestyle, you dig? I see you looking for a way out here. You don’t have to do that, you know. He loves you.”

  I felt my resolve slipping. “He might love me now, but when I’m out of sight I’ll probably be out of mind. I love him, too, but I don’t want to hold him back. He’s got you guys to worry about.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “So that’s how you’re going to play it?”

  I crossed my arms to mirror his. “I’m not playing anything, Mage! I’m just being realistic. We’ll see what happens. I’m not fooling myself into thinking that he’s going to want to continue things after he leaves. I’m just me and he’s got a whole world out there I know nothing about.”

  Mage dropped his arms and shook his head, a frustrated sigh escaping him. “There’s nothing ‘just’ about you Jaylene. And if you believe all this you’re spouting right now? You’re just going to push him away. Don’t do this.”