Forbidden To Love (The Erosians)

by D Wills

  “No, I was glued to Josh waiting for him to get his jersey off like the rest of them! What is he hiding under there” her friend smirks back?

  “Well you know he’s off limits – Stacey has her eyes firmly set on him!” Another girl joins in closing her locker door and leading them towards the classrooms.

  Stacey can get in line!

  Whoa what am I saying? My body releases the breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding; I slow my pace to a more natural one as I almost catch something whisper my name in the corridor trying to entice me back. If I keep moving forward, I’ll be safe.

  I stop by my locker to swap my books. With one arm, I gently close my locker door and lean my back against the hard metal. Surely now in this well-lit corridor with the classrooms only a few feet away I won’t hear any more whispers. I close my eyes and focus on slowing my breathing. I just need a few seconds to compose myself before facing the school again. Really I’m just trying to remember anything from the few weeks’ induction I had about this life that might tell me what he is.

  I can’t focus though. When I close my eyes, he’s there. When I see him, I start to feel on edge. Is this obsession all in my mind? Did he actually control an aura and I just couldn’t make it out? Was I too focused on those eyes? Those deep brown almost black penetrating eyes; or how his jersey stretched across his sculpted chest? The chest that I wish his arms would hold me against just once?

  Hold on a minute, what am I thinking? Snapping open my eyes I look for anything that could get the vision of us in a more than intimate embrace to disappear. I inanely search the floor cracks for any image but his. These thoughts aren’t the ones I'm meant to be having. I'm a Goddess of love, to give love, not to receive the stupid wanting sensation I give everyone else.

  These are the sorts of thoughts Amora plants in people’s minds to help them fall in love. Amora has advanced further than just sticking auras together like I do; she can actually manipulate minds into falling in love.

  Am I falling?

  Is that what this is? Seeing him didn’t feel like falling; the sensation was more like someone or something was sucking me into an abyss! Causing every nerve in my body to electrify at the thought of being with him, causing my heart to contract and expand to the near point of explosion with every picture I create of him. I’ve only seen him once but then ‘love at first sight’ had to come from somewhere.

  Oh no.

  The pains in my stomach erupt, causing me to clutch my sides together as my breath splutters in my throat. The football squad run down the hall freshly changed out of their gear. I lift my eyes shyly, trying my best to look normal and not show my pain from being crushed internally. One of the bigger guys, Blane I think his name is shouts, “Hey Josh, she’s waiting for you.”

  The other guys howl with laughter. I close my eyes, dip my chin to my chest and wish I were invisible.

  “Hey, you ok?”

  I gaze up to find Josh standing in front of me, his hand reaching out towards my arm that I'm currently wrapping around my sides in an attempt to hold my body together; as this crunching threatens to destroy me from the inside. I lock eyes with him and the pain melts quickly away leaving me in a newly familiar state of tranquillity.

  Josh isn’t in his football kit anymore. His dark jeans are baggy on his hips; held up by a black leather belt, his thin white t-shirt sits snugly at the waist of his pants. Josh’s fingers graze my arm as he waits for me to answer him. A quick blast of fire shoots through me. I almost let out a scream, but the pain is already gone. Now there is a new sense; a pulling, a yearning to be closer to him.

  Something must have been funny about my expression as Josh laughs lightly and looks away. My eyes are released from his hypnotic stare. I focus anywhere but towards him, embarrassed to be staring so openly at him. There’s no use trying to decide now whether he is good or evil, mortal or immortal or undead; my mind is far too scrambled to make sense of anything. I can practically envisage the chasm opening up before me; daring me to jump in, to give in to these strange unnerving emotions for Josh.

  His face is so close to mine, his breath dances before me and slips easily down my throat; reaching every part of me, making every part of me want to touch him.

  The rational part of my brain screams at me to stay strong no matter how freaked I’m getting. But my primal need for his touch is threatening to overpower my mind's reality check.

  This could all be a trick. He could be using powers to put me in this state; to make me vulnerable so kidnapping me would be easier. Right now I think I’d willingly give into any diabolical plan he has mapped out for me.

  No, Acacia wake up!

  “What are you?” I barely hear the words escape my mouth as they are the quietest whisper but Josh laughs and raises his eyebrows.

  “Erm….a senior?” He answers still laughing nervously.

  I burn red and mentally fix my feet to the floor and force my eyes to stare down as I try to keep my mind clear so his closeness doesn’t distract me! I need to stay in control; I need to figure this out. I do not need to touch him. I do not need to press my body against his.

  I start to run my eyes up his body, hoping I’ll find a clue to what he is. Nothing in his clothing gives him away. There are no emblems of allegiance to any race. I'm not sure I’d recognize one if I saw one anyway. The parts of his skin naked to me, mainly his arms, show no hint as to what he is.

  Taking a deep breath in I approach his collar bone, ready to look further up back into his beautifully crafted face. I force myself not to pause on his full lips or the hypnotic power of his eyes; just in case their power has returned.

  Instead I focus on the messy cut of his hair, but it doesn’t work; my eyes follow the strands as they fall across his face, leading me straight back to his eyes, and once they lock with mine I'm lost.

  We’re all alone in the hall. All the other students are at their classes. He’s still staring at me, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he looks anxiously around; obviously uncomfortable, obviously not wanting to be seen talking to me!

  “Erm, sorry yeh course you are” I glimpse around the corridor hurriedly trying to make sense of what to do. Stand here and make small talk, ask him outright if he’s an Underworld demon or throw my arms around him and kiss him until neither of us can breathe.

  “You sure you’re ok, you seem a little worked up” Josh tilts his head to the side trying to get me to look at him, but I'm too terrified to lock eyes with him. What if I'm never released from his hold? No, I won’t be a prisoner to another arrogant God. I swallow my fear in the same way I did when I was presented to Eros; I didn't let him bully me, I'm sure as hell not going to let some jumped up minor God intimidate me.

  “Is that what you want me to be?”

  He smirks, taken aback at by questioning, but he quickly composes himself.

  “There are a lot of things I’d like you to be”

  My mouth falls slack as his turns up into a grin. I hold no answer for him, and he doesn't need one. He winks as he starts to walk backwards away from me. Just as he gets to the corner he turns on his heel and disappears.

  What in Hades?

  My insides are like ice. What did he just do? The scorching fire was so intense, but he stopped the burning with his touch. Maybe the pain was my body’s way of telling me to get the hell out of there, and he silenced the warning. Or were the fiery sensations trying to tell me to get closer. Does that happen?

  I did notice in the midst of my acting like the biggest loser and staring at him in a trance, he most definitely had no aura. I need to figure out who or what he is, and why he’s here. I need to make sense of things fast before these urges growing inside of me turn into something more; something I can no longer control.

  Reaching my class at the end of the corridor, now ten minutes late so there is no way I can sneak in. I try to open the door, but it creaks loudly as if my being late needed any further announcement. Mr. Simmons is standin
g at the front of the class. He turns to glare straight at me.

  “Ah Miss Rose how lovely of you to join us” He folds his arms, waiting for my excuse.

  “Erm … sorry, sir I got couldn’t find my um … text book,” I reply hopefully. I blush as I observe the rest of the class staring at me. I wish he’d hurry up and just give me detention or whatever punishment fits my lateness.

  “Why don’t you take your seat and make sure you’re on time in the future?” He turns his back to me and continues writing on the board. I don’t move, the non-punishment must be a joke. After five seconds, Simmons still makes no motions to reprimand me. Wow, that’s never happened before. I rush to my desk before he changes his mind, careful not to trip over Stacey Elling's deliberately placed bag strap as I do.

  Stacey whispers to Melissa sitting next to her, “Simmons probably feels sorry for her 'cos she’s such a loser.” Melissa stifles a giggle. Maybe they’re right. Something about me gave him the impression I needed sympathy, for him to let me off. Or he and I suspect the rest of the student body; just don’t think I'm worth bothering with.

  Simmons continues his lesson rolling down a world map and pointing out the different continents giving us facts about each one that no one in the class is bothering to write down.

  I half-listen as I stare out of the window, grateful now I sit in the back corner of the room. Never did I think a blue plastic chair and beech wood desk would provide me such a welcome haven -, but at least here I can’t embarrass myself anymore.

  I wonder what Josh is doing. I still don’t understand these almost painful tinges of desire that are now alight within me. I was hoping that being away from him might help clear my head then perhaps I would be able to figure things out, but no such luck. Is this what love is like?

  Don’t be stupid! I can’t fall in love with anyone especially not at this speed! I’ve only seen him twice. Love at first sight can only be caused by Eros or Allana. They’re the only ones who can create instantaneous attraction. Nausea begins to invade me as that little voice I silenced earlier yells at me this is a trap.

  Perhaps he planted the idea of me being in love with him in my head. He hasn’t got an aura, and he isn’t undead. Out there in the hall I noticed his pulse as I took in every inch of him; meaning he could be from Olympus.

  True I stalled on his body and pictured myself again being wrapped inside his embrace, imagining how his warmth would reach inside my body and take hold of the loneliness buried away inside. His touch would drag the string of emotion out of me, and he’d whisper in my ear how he loves me. Whoa tripped into that abyss again!

  A sigh escapes my lips.

  “Miss Rose, is there something you would like to share with us?” Simmons stands in front of my desk, tapping his black biro on the edge. Gulping, I look around to be met with all eyes staring at me. I’d become so lost in my daydream I can’t even remember what lesson I'm in.

  “Erm, can you repeat the question?” I hopefully plead with my eyes for the second time this hour.

  Simmons tuts shakes his head and returns towards the front of the class. I drop my head to my hands as my class let out a hushed giggle and a few whispers go out. I hear every word clearly. A cocktail of, ‘She’s a bit of a freak’ with, ‘How is someone so hot so weird’. Never am I so relieved when the bell rings, meaning not only the end of class but the end of the day.

  The whole school swells into the hall, madly manoeuvring around each other, all trying to be the first to get away. Their auras dance above their heads in their own private ballroom, doesn't matter how many matches I can see with the rush they’re all in I’ve got no hope of pairing any up. Stopping at my locker to throw my books back in with more force than necessary I let out a deliberately long sigh. Perhaps, if, I breathe all the air out of my body, some of the thoughts of Josh might leave with it.

  Out of the corner of my eye I recognise Cassidy fiddling with her locker combination. She’s clearly struggling. Her dark brown eyes furrow together in confusion. She keeps pushing her slender fingers through her straight black hair, gripping it tightly as the lock refuses to open for her. She looks around in frustration and unexpectedly meets Keagan's eyes.

  Cassidy’s annoyance quickly turns to shyness as a small blush reddens her cheeks and the faintest of smiles creeps onto her lips. Keagan smiles in return and bravely walks across. I remove the shield I put up in my last lesson and allow their conversation to seep into my mind.

  “You having some trouble?” Keagan asks with an unusual edge of formality to his voice.

  “I think the doors jammed. I put my combination in, but the lock won’t budge.” Cassidy’s calm response settles Keagan’s nerves.

  As he gazes at her, her smile grows, and her shoulders slump as she relaxes against the locker. Keagan laughs and rests his hand close to hers, momentarily hiding his face in his arm to mask his embarrassed at so blatantly staring at her.

  “Let me take a look.” He takes hold of the lock. “Sometimes they’re just a bit stiff, and you need a little extra force to get them to work.” Cassidy rolls her eyes, but her smile remains. She’s trying to feign annoyance at having to be helped out by someone she perceives to be a mindless jock, but her smile betrays her and the flirtatious glint in her eyes shows she’s secretly enjoying their little rendezvous.

  Keagan pulls on the base of the lock, and it pops out, springing the door open, just as three of Cassidy’s friends come around the corner all comparing their freshly painted nails. They stop dead when they catch sight of Cassidy and Keagan, their faces full of disapproval.

  Cassidy gulps at their expressions and starts to fiddle with the strap on her bag. Fully aware of Keagan trying to continue their conversation, she cuts him short.

  “Thanks,” she snarls, “but you and your meathead friends were probably the morons who jammed it in the first place.” The poison hits its mark and Keagan can’t hide his genuine hurt. He stares at Cassidy open-mouthed, unsure of what to say. Then he spies the black cloud at the end of the hall. Realizing what’s going on, he shakes his head. “Right,” he mutters sadly

  As he walks away, the aura around him swells with disappointment turning it back to more his shade of green than the new one I created only an hour ago. Cassidy’s aura pushes through, tainting it with regret and restoring the almost defeated shimmer to the colour of their undiscovered love. There may still be hope for them.

  “So, let me guess. You actually have a thing for Keagan, and you wanted me to find out what he thinks of you?” Josh is stood right next me. I was so wrapped up in staring at Cassidy and Keagan I didn’t even hear him walk up, and the echoes of footsteps in these corridors are usually deafening. Especially when they’re empty like now. And my body didn’t warn me either. I didn’t suffer any spasms or sickening crunches. I felt nothing.

  I angle myself towards him as his scent washes over me and the pull to touch him continues to get stronger every second. I open my mouth to deny his assumption.

  “No, don’t interrupt. Obviously you were too shy to come and ask me, and that’s why you were standing staring earlier outside. Then in the hall you didn't want to talk much 'cos you were wishing it was Keagan talking to you.”

  He stares at me with the smuggest grin I’ve ever seen plastered across his face. I've seen some pretty smug grins living with Amora.

  Whatever pull I had towards him has gone. The only pull I feel now is in my hand, and that wants to slap the smirk right off his face. He’s got to be a God like me; his arrogance is way above mortal levels.

  I’m almost positive he’s working for Amora to humiliate me. Amora has hated me since I was created and she’s spent the length of my life finding new ways to make me miserable. This must be her latest idea.

  This is the sort of thing she’d do. With her matchless beauty, she can talk any man, woman or immortal into doing just about anything she desires. On the rare occasions she can’t, well, Aphrodite is her biggest fan, so she always lends her he
r cestus to use on those needing extra persuasion.

  Josh appears pretty pleased with himself. Perhaps she isn’t the one behind this; perhaps Josh is and he has been using her to get information on me.

  For all, I know Josh's creation could have happened before Amora - maybe even before Allana. After all the only information given to me is what is deemed necessary for me to know. That’s their explanation anyway. I know there is so much more that they are all hiding from me. Maybe Josh is a part of the nest of secrets. He would need to be an Erosian and a pretty advanced one; if he’s planted the idea of my being attracted to him in my head, which would explain, why my day has been totally messed up.

  Well, he’s played with me long enough, and I'm not going to stand here and act stupidly any longer. “I know what you are, Josh, and that’s probably not even your name. I know you know I'm not interested in Keagan, and you know that I know you caused all this drama today by doing your special mind trick. Let me guess, you’re Amora’s latest toy, and you’re doing this together as a practical joke.”

  I rush my first theory out in one breath, not wanting to give him a chance to interrupt me. If he denies that one, I’ll go for him being older than Allana.

  I stand as still as I can; trying my best to keep my nerve while my chest rises and falls at a rapid pace, betraying my attempt at a calm exterior. I try pointlessly to simmer the anger that is rising within me. I may be younger than Amora, but that doesn’t mean she can amuse herself at my expense like this. Josh’s air of confident arrogance gives way to confusion, “Who’s Amora?” Oh no, he’s dumbfounded. My anger turns to ice.

  “And what mind trick can I do, and, for that matter, what drama?”

  Oh crap, the expression on his face flickers between confusion, annoyance and expectation. I’m wrong, and now I ensured more attention will be focused on me than ever before. Allana is going to kill me. I don’t know what to say, but that doesn’t matter; Josh hasn’t finished.