Running Away (Finding Your Place Book 2)

by Rebecca Barber

  “All right already!” I screeched through the dark house. With my luck, it was probably some pimple-faced pizza delivery boy with the wrong address.

  Without even bothering to pull on my robe or some sweat pants, I stomped down the hallway, flipping on every light as I went.

  “What?” It almost came out as a growl as I opened the door.

  But the moment I did, I wished I’d been more polite.

  Chapter 21

  Derek

  If I’d have known she would come to the door looking like that, I’d have been here hours ago. I don’t know if it was the sleep shirt that clung to the top of her thighs showing more than it hid, or the messy bed hair, but the look on her face confirmed I’d made the right decision driving across town, and standing out here in the rain just to see her.

  I was soaked.

  My jeans clung to me like a second skin. Thankfully, I’d found my leather jacket on the backseat and it had kept me at least partially dry. Even standing under the cover of the awning, the wind was strong enough to blow the fat drops sideways.

  “It. Was. Not. Your. Fault.” I punctuated my words forcefully. It was why I came. Well, that’s what I kept telling myself the entire drive over. Now, standing there in front of her, I couldn’t help but wonder how much more there was.

  As shocked registered in her eyes, she licked her lips, and the memory of how sweet she tasted overwhelmed me. She was tempting. Too tempting. I dug my hands deep in my pockets in an effort to restrain myself. I didn’t come here for that. At least, that’s what I kept repeating to myself. I came here to make sure she knew what I did wasn’t her fault. When her message had pinged my phone almost an hour earlier, I wanted to tear strips off Zoe. In fact, for ten minutes that’s pretty much exactly what I’d done. I think the only reason I’d stopped was because when I’d finally stopped ranting to take a breath, I’d looked down at her and saw the fat tears balancing on her eyelashes. Instantly I’d backed off. Ranting and raving like a lunatic wasn’t going to help anyone. I knew Zoe well enough to know, while her attempt may have been slightly misguided, her intentions were well placed.

  “Want to come in?” Mia invited.

  She tugged on the hem of her shirt as the flush of red crept up from the V of her neckline. I wasn’t sure she really wanted me in there. “Mia, it’s fine. I just wanted to make sure you knew it wasn’t you.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay then.”

  I stepped away, digging the keys from my pocket.

  “Derek.” Mia’s sweet voice startled me. “Get inside. I’m getting wet out here.”

  I looked at her quizzically. The look on her face left no room for argument. She was determined. I slipped through the gap as she held the door, making sure I didn’t drip on her as I passed by.

  When it clicked closed behind me, Mia moved towards me. She smelt like dessert. Vanilla cupcakes. I didn’t even like dessert. I didn’t have a sweet tooth at all, but right now I wanted my cupcake served with cream and ice cream. Or Mia served with cream and ice cream. Damn! The thought alone made my cock twitch.

  “Stay here. I’ll grab you a towel.”

  “Thanks.”

  Looking down, I saw the puddle forming around my boots on the shiny slate grey tiles. Toeing off my shoes, I placed them neatly beside the door, feeling out of place. Having a look around her home, everything looked so grown up. So neat and tidy. I’ll admit I might not know Mia very well, but this wasn’t her. She was more vibrant than this.

  Before I had a chance to really dig a little further, she was back. “Here you go.” A pink fluffy towel was in my arms before I had chance to object. Running it over my hair and face, I caught a whiff of the feminine scent and heard the groan before I had a chance to stop it. “Give me your jeans and I’ll throw them in the dryer.”

  I dropped the towel.

  It fell from my hands.

  My jaw quickly followed.

  My heart raced.

  My pulse sky rocketed.

  All the blood in my body took a one-way trip. South.

  Now was not an ideal time for me to take my jeans off.

  I stole a glance at Mia, who had a mischievous smile dancing on her lips. If she thought she’d thrown down a challenge, one I wouldn’t rise to, she didn’t know me at all. Without lowering my eyes, I reached for my belt buckle and dropped my jeans, not moving until I heard them land with a wet thunk at my feet.

  “Oh!” Mia’s eyes widened as she gasped, but her eyes never left mine.

  I don’t know how long we stood there in the entryway, me in my leather jacket and black boxer briefs with my wet jeans around my ankles, and Mia in her sleep shirt, staring at each other. Now the gauntlet had been thrown down, neither one of us wanted to be the first to blink. When Mia swallowed deeply, my breathing hitched and I couldn’t do it anymore. It was painful.

  Bending down. I scooped up my towel and wrapped it around my waist. hiding my rising embarrassment before I grabbed my wet jeans. “Are we…” my voice faltered and trailed away.

  It took a moment for Mia to catch on, but she reached out and took the jeans from my hand, balling them up. “We’re alone.”

  It was like she read my mind.

  I felt my whole body shudder and relax.

  I had no intention of jumping her bones. Well, maybe I had a few ideas, but I had some restraint. I just hoped I had enough of it.

  “Come on.”

  I followed her creamy thighs, yep, I’d looked while I’d scooped up my stuff, down the hall like a puppy on a leash. A puppy that was doing everything he could to try and hide just how happy he really was.

  If I thought for a minute trying to control my imagination and body was difficult as I shuffled towards Mia’s bedroom, then right now I was in hell. Why I’d ever agreed to this, I’d never know. One day I might, but right now, right now I was fucking clueless. I was sitting on Mia’s bed, surrounded by her scent, wearing nothing by my socks, jocks, and a grey t-shirt that shouldn’t really be seen in public. One sleeve the thread had come loose, and the hem had fallen down, while the bottom sported a white spot where I’d obviously spilt something. I was a freaking embarrassment. Mia was either completely oblivious or she was too polite to say anything. I hoped for the first.

  When Mia shifted her head, I sucked in a breath and held it. The TV in the corner of her room was on some crime show, with the volume low. To be honest, even after half an hour of watching it, I couldn’t tell you what the hell was happening. I couldn’t even remember the chick who died. I mean, how could I? Lying on her side, with her head on a pillow in my lap, was Mia. She was tucked in a tiny ball. Up against me, her warmth set my skin on fire. For ten minutes, I’d argued with myself where to put my hand. In the end, Mia had taken the indecision away from me. She’d grabbed my hand, placed it on her hip, and held it there. Fuck, it felt good. It felt like it belonged. My fingers itched to move, but I fought the compulsion. My hands anywhere on Mia’s scorching hot body was enough. For now.

  “Stop watching me,” Mia admonished.

  My mouth fell open and I was surprised Mia didn’t lift her eyes at the sound. “How did you know?”

  “I just did.”

  There was an honesty in her answer I didn’t understand, but couldn’t help but to admire.

  The episode ended and another began. My eyes felt heavy. I needed to get my shit sorted out. Mia was becoming too important too quickly. It was scary as fuck. I wasn’t in a position to deal with that. Not after the letter that had arrived yesterday. I refused to make promises I wasn’t sure I could keep. Especially when Mia came with her own baggage. She hasn’t said a lot, not yet…she didn’t have to. The signs were there. The gym that was like a fortress. Her odd living situation. Her reluctance to let people in. Let men in. Let me in. After spending more than five minutes with her, you could tell she was closed off and hiding. I just had to figure out whether or not she was worth the fight.

  One look at the pixie in my
lap and there was no question.

  She was worth it.

  Every day of the week.

  Every. Fucking. Day.

  I couldn’t help it. I leant down and kissed her forehead. There was something protective about it. Fuck if I know why I did it, or where it came from, I just couldn’t stop myself.

  “What was that for?” her voice came, soft and sleepy, and it was sexy as hell.

  It took me a minute…longer than it should have. Longer than was acceptable. I shrugged my shoulders. “I…I don’t know.” It was the god’s honest truth. I had no idea what the hell I was doing.

  “Oh, okay.” Mia yawned, stretched…she looked like a cat. A soft mewl passed her lips as her eyes fell closed. My girl was sleepy. Without a word she wriggled around, smacking me in the face with her pillow until she was lying beside me, her thigh thrown across mine. “Can you turn off the light?”

  I was whipped. Without arguing, I reached out and clicked off the light before trying to slide out from under her, but she wasn’t making it easy. In fact, she was making it hard. Rock fucking hard.

  “Stop moving and go to sleep.”

  “You want me to stay?” The shock in my voice was evident for all to hear.

  My heart was pounding. This woman couldn’t be serious. I barely knew her. Hell, I was barely dressed. And I was in her parents’ house. Who knew when they’d be home? For all I knew, they might have already come in. Shit! My palms were sweaty and I was panicking.

  “Derek!” her voice grabbed my attention. “Lie down. Shut up. Go to sleep.”

  “I can’t stay, Tinkerbell.”

  “Can’t or won’t?”

  I’m sure it was a trick question. There couldn’t be a right answer. I’d bet money on it.

  “Shouldn’t. Mia…”

  “Don’t Mia me, Derek.” She shot up and was suddenly sitting there, bleary-eyed, pouty, and as annoyed as fuck. “Get your sexy butt back in this bed and go to sleep. I’m tired.”

  I felt the cocky grin creep over my face and my chest puff out. Tinkerbell wasn’t a pushover. Something I’d need to remember. She might be tiny, but she was a firecracker. One I was going to have a great time setting off. Repeatedly. With the fight seeping out of me, I snuggled down under the covers and tucked Mia up against me as close as I could get her.

  “Thank you.”

  Her warm breath tickled my neck. I wasn’t going to sleep a wink tonight, and I didn’t give a toss. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be right now. We’d deal with real life tomorrow. I’m sure it’d still be there.

  My eyes closed and a silence settled across us. For a long moment, I lay completely still, hypnotized by Mia’s steady breaths and the violence of the storm raging beyond the window. “So, you think I have a sexy butt?” I teased. I felt her try to wriggle away. Not a fucking chance I was letting that happen. Instead I tightened my hands around her waist and held fast.

  “Shut up and go to sleep.”

  I didn’t need to see her face to know she was smiling. I felt it.

  ***

  Pain.

  Excruciating, white hot, blinding pain tore through my body.

  I doubled over and clutched my balls protectively. It was hard to believe that moments ago I’d been lost in one of the best dreams I’d had in a long time and now I was curled in the foetal position with my eyes watering, gasping for breath.

  I heard a squeal behind me but I couldn’t turn to see it. I couldn’t move. I was frozen in that spot. Nothing was moving me until the pain subsided or at least eased.

  After a few deep breaths, I managed to focus enough to start to put things back into perspective. I wasn’t in my own room. It was too girly. “Shit, Mia!” Forcing myself to sit up despite the agonizing pain, I had to get to Mia.

  When I managed to turn around, the hurt I saw in Mia’s wide eyes made my own seem insignificant. Wiping my eyes on my forearm, I forced any sign discomfort from my face and steadied my voice. It wasn’t fucking easy. “Mia…”

  She was standing across the room, her back pressed against the mirrored wardrobe door, her whole body stiff as a board. I watched as her shoulders rose and fell rapidly as she struggled to steady her out of control breathing. Everything about Mia appeared panicked. Rising to my feet, I wobbled towards her, noticing for the first time that I was wearing only one sock. Right now that wasn’t important. I paused just out of Mia’s reach. There was something wrong. Seriously wrong. I couldn’t push it. If she wanted to tell me, then I was here to listen whenever she was ready.

  “Mia…talk to me.” The neediness in my voice was undeniable but I didn’t give a shit.

  “I-I-I…”

  She couldn’t look at me. Her eyes were set on the floor. Her whole face was pale and covered by a thin film of sweat. She was a fucking disaster. I wished I had my pants on. Having this conversation, hell, having any conversation in my underwear was unsettling. Glancing at the clock, I noticed it was a little before four in the morning. The storm had eased, but the rain was still rattling steadily on the window.

  Slowly, so as not to startle her, I extended my hand out in front of her, hoping she’d take it.

  I swear my heart was going to explode.

  Or my head.

  Or my lungs.

  My heart raced.

  My head pounded.

  I forgot to take a breath.

  I didn’t take my eyes of her.

  She looked like a terrified kitten.

  Like a kitten who’d been dunked in a bucket of icy water and knew it was coming again.

  It was a look I’d seen before.

  Too many times.

  A look I didn’t want to see again.

  Ever.

  And definitely not on Mia.

  When her icy fingertips touched mine, I knew I was one hundred and fifty percent fucked. The relief that flooded my veins was undeniable. Unmistakable. Unshakable. I might have been oblivious to many things most of the time, I was a guy after all, but not this time. This time even blind Freddie couldn’t miss this one.

  Chapter 22

  Mia

  He looked at me like I was a freak. I hated it. I hated the way he was watching me like there was something wrong with me. This was exactly why I lived my life the way I did. Most people didn’t agree with it, they didn’t understand it, but I didn’t care. I didn’t have to. Having my rules, my walls, this was what I was trying to avoid. The odd looks. The pity. Fuck, I knew there was something wrong with me. I didn’t need someone pointing it out. There was a lot wrong with me.

  All I wanted to do was escape into the bathroom and have a shower so hot that it burnt off the lingering fears that clung to my skin. But Derek was standing there, sincerity written all over his sexy face. He wanted to help me. Desperately. As much as it pained me to do so, I reached out and dropped my hand into his. I half expected him to pull me to him and crush me against his chest. Yet Derek surprised me. Again. He didn’t move a muscle. It was like his feet were planted where he stood. They remained unmoving. Cemented in place. Instead, he rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand soundlessly. Back and forth. Up and down. In small circles. Just when I thought I’d be able to predict the next pattern, he’d change it up and knock me off balance. His eyes never once left my hand. It was oddly comforting and exactly what I never knew I needed.

  Truthfully, this guy was scaring the shit out of me. How could he possibly know precisely what I needed in the moment I needed it? He didn’t even know why I was freaking the fuck out.

  “Derek…”

  “Yeah?” He looked up at me with huge, reassuring eyes.

  “Can you do something for me?”

  “Sure,” he agreed. He didn’t want to. But he did. The hesitation in his voice revealed the truth. “What do you need?”

  “Can you…” Fuck, this was embarrassing. I didn’t want to ask. I hated being this person. This was the person I’d been running from for so long. Yet here she was, back with a vengeance. Back to hum
iliate me right when I didn’t need it. “Can you hold me while I fall asleep?” As the words fell from my mouth, I dropped my eyes. I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t bear to see rejection. On top of everything else, that would be too much right now.

  Derek didn’t answer me. At least, not with words. Instead, he intertwined our fingers and led me back towards my bed before pulling back the covers. Everything this guy did was just so damn…nice. Most people hated the word nice…usually I did, it was a nothing word. With Derek though, somehow it just fit. Don’t get me wrong, he was sexy as sin, and boiled my blood like no one I’d ever met. And he was funny, and smart, and caring, and a whole bunch of other wonderful things, but nice seemed to dominate them all.

  “Climb in.” I did without a word. As soon as my head hit the pillow, a loud yawn escaped me. “Get some sleep, Tinkerbell.”

  “You’re not leaving, are you?” I panicked, suddenly wide awake again.

  He chuckled, and the sound of his laughter settled my stomach. Derek didn’t know, and he probably never would, but that one simple laugh made everything better. Easier. “No. You asked me to hold you, so that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

  “Oh. Okay.” I felt the smile tug on my lips and hoped Derek didn’t see it. He didn’t need to. He clicked off the lamp and laid down beside me. Something was off, though. I felt the heaviness of his arm settle around my waist and the warmth of his breath against my neck. I wish I could say it was a hard one to figure out, but it was actually embarrassing simple. Derek hadn’t slipped beneath the blankets. Instead he was lying on top. It pissed me off. It was almost like he was afraid to get too close.

  “Mia…” his voice was barely a whisper.

  “Mmmm.”