Inés came and went, bringing trays of food that made my stomach roil but they went untouched. Heloïse, Remé, Rodney and Amelia, all of them came with soft voices and kind words and I ignored every one of them, staring blankly into space; I didn't want comfort. I wanted to rage and destroy and tear the world apart by the seams but I locked it away- for now. Cyd didn't come. I didn't care, I knew she blamed me but that was fine, I blamed me too. There were others though, others I blamed more and I would make them pay.
Cain had been first. He came to see me and brought with him the realisation that my magic had gone. If it hadn’t, he would have been dead. He had brought up a shield to defend himself against the onslaught and I knew the power that was recently so easily within my grasp should have smashed it to pieces. There was an anger behind it that even he could not have withstood, but nothing happened. It was like it had been shut away from me, barred behind a locked door. He had sunk to the floor beside the bed looking at me with a mixture of awe and pity, his empty eyes for once holding some kind of emotion. I wondered at first why he should look at me like that when my power had deserted me but then I realised. I really would have done it. I would have killed my own brother.
I was just as much of a killer as he was.Worse, for everything he had ever done had been to protect me. Yet I could never forgive him. It had been Cain who had told Corvus how to defeat Dis Pater. It had been Cain who had told him to give his power to me. He had taken Corvus from me and now ... Now Corvus was in the hands of that bastard god. He had thwarted Dis Pater’s plans, kept me from him and what would that mean for him? Cast into Dis Pater’s realm, what would that mean for him?
“You can’t access your own power, not until Corvus’ power is a part of you.”
I looked at him, cold-eyed, and could see the exhaustion behind his expression. What had he done to be here with me, for this? How many had he sacrificed so he could come and offer up the biggest sacrifice of his entire existence at my altar. His soul was as black as pitch and I doubted he had ever had a heart.
“I am sorry, Jéhenne.”
“Don’t you dare speak to me.”
“He would have done it himself. I was only making it easier for him.”
“You bastard! You killed him weeks ago, or maybe it was decades ... Centuries! How long have you known this was what you would do?”
His shoulders slumped and he ran his hand though his hair. “Not long, Jéhenne, I swear it but when I found out it was Dis Pater who was pursuing you, it all began to fall into place ... There was nothing else to do, you must see that?”
I stared at him, struck dumb by his complete lack of understanding. “I will never see that what you did was the right thing. So I would have gone to Dis Pater. I would have found a way back. I would have found a way!”
He got to his feet, fury in every line of his body and grabbed me by the shoulders, shaking me hard. “No! You wouldn’t, you would never have escaped him. You would have been at his mercy. Do you have any idea what that would have done to Corvus? Did you ever think how he would feel, knowing you were destined to spend all eternity either pleasing a man you were afraid of or suffering the consequences? He may be suffering now, Jéhenne, but he chose his fate. He chose the lesser of two evils and you are free. That is what he wanted, for you to live, to carry on the family and for you to protect them as they will protect you.”
I pushed him away. I knew he was telling the truth but it didn’t change how I felt. Every time I looked at him I saw the knife in his hands, Corvus’ blood on his hands. I sank down onto the edge of the bed, my legs unable to support me any longer.
“What will Dis Pater have done with him?”
It was the question I needed an answer to but had been so afraid to ask. Now I needed to know, I had to know.
I saw him flinch and he walked away from me, sitting down heavily in a chair by the fire, he stared at the dying embers, not looking at me.
“Tartarus,” was all he said.
It was enough.
He had been sent to end his existence in a world of fire and suffering, the place where the horrors of all the worlds resided, where the evil and the vile were sent to pay for their crimes through all eternity. The word rang through my head, repeating on an endless loop as I stared at Cain, unmoving. His eyes lifted to mine and I stared back at him, emotionless.
“Tell me.”
“Jéhenne ...”
“Tell me!”
“He will be condemned to die, every day of his existence, for eternity.”
His words washed over me, the horror of what he was saying unable to penetrate my mind. It simply couldn’t cope with any more pain.
“Time moves differently there, Jéhenne, and by now ... he will be quite mad. No one survives Tartarus, that is the only blessing. Their minds are gone within days. He won’t be Corvus anymore, just a creature of instinct, little more than an animal.”
I got to my feet, my body shaking with fury, with fear, with my heart breaking for what he was having to endure while I was here safe. I crossed to stand by the fire, staring down into the blaze of heat and feeling the fierce burn against my skin.
“Oh ... Well, that’s alright then,” I said softly. I looked at Cain and knew, knew I had the same dead eyes that he had. He had killed everything soft about me, everything good, that girl was gone, and she wasn’t coming back until Corvus was here beside me.
“No, Jéhenne.”
“You can’t stop me.”
“He gave everything so that you would be safe. You can’t do it!”
“Watch me.”
He got to his feet and stood close, green eyes blazing into mine. “You can’t save him.”
“I will.”
“Do you know what is happening while you sleep? Dis Pater has been trying to break the wards, he’s trying to get to you, Jéhenne, and you want to what? Stroll back into the underworld and take Corvus back?”
“The whole idea of Corvus giving up his life was to give me his power, yes? With his power and mine, and the key- I can defeat him.”
He stepped closer and grabbed my arms. “You can stop him taking you to the underworld. I didn’t say you could declare war on him!”
I pushed him away in disgust. “And you think I would let him get away with everything that he has done? To me, to Corvus? You think I would have this power and do ...nothing?”
I sank to my knees in front of the fire, holding my hands out as though praying to a fiery god of my own creation. “I am Master of this house and I will make him pay. I am Master of this house and I ...will make him pay. I am Master of this house!”
I let go ...of everything, of the pain and the sorrow and let rage at what Dis Pater had done overwhelm me. There was a rumble through the very walls of the Chateau and I sensed every vampire, from the most powerful to the weakest newborn, gasp. I felt their eyes on me as I claimed them as my own. Their sorrow at the loss of their Master was overwhelming but the relief, the security of knowing I was accepting them was there too ...and suspicion. Fear that I wasn’t strong enough, fear that I wasn’t one of them, not vampire but I was all they had, I was the chosen Master, and they clung to me.
The power ripped through me with pain and with fire, my own magic returning and blazing over my skin in a rush of blue flame. I could see myself, reflected in the eyes of my family and they bowed down in awe. I was a beacon, a fiery beacon, blazing in their mind’s eye as they watched and I felt the power rush through my veins, as every connection to every mind clicked into place and I felt the pull of history. I remembered the moment of each of their turnings, when I had made them. I blinked, confused and realised that with the power came memories and I felt tears slide down my face as I welcomed them, welcomed anything that brought me closer to him.
I looked up and saw Cain, he had backed away and was watching with the same awed expression as the vampires. I stretched out my senses and found Amelia, and saw Rodney looking at her fearfully as I looked out through her eyes. I
tested a little further and suddenly I could see ...everything. My eyes were looking out of thousands of others and if I wanted to I would know everything, every thought they had ever had since the day they were born.
No.
I slammed shut the connection and collapsed, gasping for breath and shivering once again, despite the sweat that trickled down my face. That had been an invasion. Corvus would not have done that.
I sat in front of the flames, buzzing with the power that had surged through me, too stunned to move, to speak, and then the world exploded into pain.
Voices drifted in and out of focus. I felt myself being lifted and whoever touched me made my skin burn with pain. It melted my flesh like heat touching ice and I screamed and hit out. I heard a bellow of pain that was not my own and hands scrabbling at my wrists and ankles. They were tying me down. I felt trapped, exposed and screaming, I bucked and thrashed against the restraints as voices shouted instructions and yelled in fear and panic.
I tried to focus, to see through the pain at those who were attacking me and my eyes widened as they fell on Rodney and Inés, even Cyd, looking at me as though I had murdered her father.
Maybe I had?
Cain was there too, and Lucas.
“She needs blood.”
All eyes turned to look at him, including mine. My brain felt like it was full of tiny shards of ice but it didn’t stop his words hitting like a gun shot.
“She’s not a filthy vampire!” Inés spat back at him.
He sneered at her in disdain. “Look at her, Inés. She’s freezing and she’s in agony. I know starvation when I see it. I’m telling you she needs blood.”
I screamed incoherently on the bed, thrashing around against the restraints. No ... This couldn’t be happening to me. Lucas had always despised me; perhaps this was a form of revenge.
“Get out, Lucas,” yelled Cain. “You’re making her worse.”
Looking from Cain to Inés he sneered in disgust and shook his head. “No, I’m not, you fools, but call me when you realise I’m right.”
He closed the door behind him and as he did, something snapped in my mind. With an ease that would probably freak me out when my sanity returned, the restraints shattered.
“Shit!” Rodney made a dive and grabbed one wrist, while Cyd and Amelia hung onto the other for dear life. Inés grabbed the restraints and spelled them back together.
“That aint gonna hold ‘er for long. I don’t think we got any choice, if you lot are out of ideas ... We need to try what Lucas said.”
I roared in fury and pain on the bed but no one was listening because I couldn’t form the words. The pain was just too intense to focus on anything else.
Rodney looked at Inés who blanched.
“Bloody hell, Inés!”
“She’s not a vampire,” she said stubbornly. “It can’t be that, I don’t believe it.” He rolled his eyes and looked at Cain who just shook his head. “My blood is too tainted; I would not have her taste it.”
“Oh fine, well I guess I’m it then!” Rodney snatched the knife that Cain offered him, and drew a fine line across his wrist. Sitting on the bed he held his arm over my mouth. “Come on, luv, do it for Rodney, there’s a good girl.”
The first drops of blood hit my mouth and I screamed, which was worse as some of them made it down my throat. The taste of old pennies and the smell of copper filled my mouth and I gagged and wretched. “No, no, no!” I screamed as icy snakes writhed in my veins, as agony clawed at my guts for some nameless desire
The door crashed open and Lucas was standing there, glaring with fury at everyone in the room.
“What the hell are you doing to her now? She’s screaming in my head like a bloody banshee.”
“We’re doin’ what you said to do, moron. You said give her blood!”
Lucas growled and pushed Rodney out of the way. “Not human blood you fool, she’s not a vampire.” He sat down on my left and gently threaded his right arm under my head to raise it up before swiftly cutting into his wrist with his fangs. “She needs the connection to the family, to Corvus. She needs power.” He held his wrist, just as Rodney had done and all of a sudden the world stopped spinning.
Chapter 58
There was an owl on the hunt in the village. I could hear its cry. I could even hear the tiny heartbeat of its prey hammering with violent inevitability as sharp talons pierced delicate skin. As the villagers slept in their beds their hearts picked up a little at the owl’s call, some ancient strand of DNA trying to make itself heard over the knowledge of iPads and electricity. The desire of the species to be safe, to survive, still strong in their bones and blood. I heard the whisper of the wind in the trees, and the pounding hearts of the three human bodies in the room. All of this was processed by my mind and immediately dismissed. Nothing ... Nothing mattered except for the sweet smell of the blood Lucas was offering me.
He leaned over and released the restraints as I moaned, annoyed that his movements interfered with my feeding. I snatched at his arm, holding his wrist still as my mouth latched firmly against him. Immediately the snakes stopped their writhing under my skin, and a small pool of warmth began to spread out from my belly. I wriggled closer to him on the bed, trying to get a better angle, to get more and faster.
“Get out!” Lucas yelled to our audience. I spared a moment to register their shocked faces but filed it away for later, right now I simply didn’t care. Lucas shifted me over on the bed so that he could lay down behind me. It didn’t bother me. I didn’t care what he did as long as he made the pain go away. He held me in his arms and the feeling I remembered from the night before stole over me- familiar and comforting. Slowly the warmth filled my veins, melting the ice and chasing away the burning cold. I began to relax, and finally exhaustion overcame me. I slept.
I awoke to feel the heat of a hard, masculine body pressed firmly against me ... a very happy masculine body if I was any judge. I smiled and wriggled closer to the warmth. I heard a soft moan and felt warm breath on my skin as a face nuzzled against my neck. I loved waking up with Corvus. But once again the hard truth came crashing down on my head, and I felt my heart begin to shatter anew. I came fully awake as the question arose ...if that wasn’t Corvus ...?
“Get the fuck away from me!”
I pushed Lucas, rather harder than I realised, and he landed in a heap on the floor.
He looked up at me blearily before running a hand through his hair, making it stick up.
“You’re welcome.” He glowered and pulled his sleeve down his arm to do the cuff back up at which point the night’s events came back to me in a rush of glorious technicolour.
“Oh shit, I think I’m going to be sick.” I fell back on the pillows, breathing heavily. Had I really done that? Had I drunk his blood?
Lucas got up off the floor. “No you’re not,” he said mildly.
“How do you know?”
He gave me a smirk, which irritated the hell out of me. “Because my blood is far too good to waste, and you enjoyed it so much I doubt you’d give it up willingly.”
Bastard.
“I’m not the only one who appeared to be enjoying myself,” I snapped back. “Would you like to explain why you were in my bed?”
He glared at me. “I had nowhere else to go. It’s daytime and too late for me to go to my own place. In any case, you wouldn't let me leave!”
“Oh, yeah, that sounds likely.”
“Whether either of us likes it or not, you are my Master now. I am bound to do what you desire. I have no choice in the matter and last night, consciously or otherwise, you wanted me to stay. Oh don’t get me wrong, I have no illusions that it was anything other than my blood you were after.”
I blushed, though I wasn’t sure whether embarrassment or fury was the major reason for it. I decided to go with fury. “Well you seemed awfully happy to be there if you ask me!”
“By the gods, Jéhenne, but you are naive. Corvus protected you from so much of our natur
e, did you know that? He was so bloody afraid of scaring you away that he didn’t always show you the truth.”
My heart started to pound. I had a feeling I didn’t want to hear this.
“We are vampires, Jéhenne, blood is our life - and our pleasure. We need it to survive but we enjoy it too. Can you imagine what it is like to be a man, to be able to choose which ever woman you please and make her want you, make her want to give you her blood and whatever else you desire?”
“You sick bastard, Lucas! Corvus wasn’t like that; he would never have done something like that.”
He snorted. “Never? He suppressed his nature and for the record so do I, though I don’t suppose you’ll believe that so easily. But the fact remains that our nature is not one that pleases your delicate sensibilities. Blood and desire, Jéhenne, the two are linked for us, and now for you, whether you like it or not.”
“Just get out! Get out and leave me alone.”
“I just told you I can’t. It’s the middle of the bloody day and I want to sleep. You took a great deal of blood and I need to rest, so move over.”
I snatched up the duvet, despite the fact I was still fully dressed under the covers. “You have got to be kidding?”
He walked over and pulled the duvet from my hands before smoothing it out and lying down on top of it.
“No, and would you go and take a shower? You stink.”
I glared at him with hatred. Fury and indignation brought blue flames to my fingertips and I thanked God my power, at least, had returned to me. Lucas eyed the flames nervously.
The Heart of Arima. Page 43