Shape Of My Heart

by Khardine Gray

  What was Hilda talking about? What was wrong with Amy’s mom?

  Amy had never mentioned anything being wrong with her. He supposed, though, that was because they’d never talked much about her and her family. He’d never asked. All these weeks she probably knew everything there was to know about him, and it just occurred to him that he knew very little about her.

  It wasn’t that he didn’t want to ask, he just hadn’t wanted to pry. She seemed to want to keep her private life separate from him, so he respected that.

  “Is her mom okay?”

  Hilda raised her eyebrows at him. “No. You didn’t know?”

  “No. But I’ll ask her. I think I may go there now and see if she’s okay. She didn’t sound too good on the phone.”

  There must have been a reason why Amy hadn’t told him whatever it was he didn’t know. She deserved her privacy but clearly felt comfortable enough to tell Hilda. Why wouldn’t she tell him too?

  “I’ll come with you,” Hilda offered, looking concerned.

  “No. I’ll see you tomorrow. Enjoy your date with Robin.”

  Hilda smiled and blushed a little. “Thank you. Please call me if you need to.”

  Josh nodded and headed to his jeep.

  He hoped Amy was okay and that she wouldn’t mind him stopping by. He’d simply go and see how she was and if she needed anything. Then he’d go.

  As the night drew by Amy could scarcely breathe. Several times throughout the day either Dom or one of his idiot friends would come by and stand outside the door. They taunted her with vile words and filled her in on what they had planned to do to her later.

  They could hear her crying and that encouraged them to taunt her even more. Dom had turned off the electricity in her apartment so she couldn’t even charge her phone. Now the battery had run out.

  She wished she’d asked Josh to get her. Or better yet get the police.

  At the time when she spoke to him she was so scared she couldn’t think straight. Then she’d heard one of the men at the door, who’d apparently been spying on her all these weeks. The things he said to her were so revolting and despicable she just about managed to finish the call with Josh.

  Now it was later. It was later now and she didn’t know what would happen to her.

  With the fear of God in her, she’d grasped so tightly onto her legs that her fingernails dug into her skin, making her legs bleed. And she couldn’t stop shaking. She’d heard of things like this happening to women. Being kidnapped and gang raped, then killed. These men weren’t decent, none of them were. They were all animals, and from what they’d said during the day she was sure that she was in for a terrible fate.

  There was a knock at the door. It made her jump and shake even more.

  “Amy.” The person sounded like Josh, but how could it be? He wouldn’t be here, he didn’t even know where she lived. She thought she would pass out from the shaking and the terror that took her when she watched the door and the bin move.

  “Amy.” The person moved the door with a little more force, prying it open.

  She moved up against the wall under the window, recoiling away, as if that could help.

  “Please have mercy,” she begged as the tears wracked her body.

  “Baby, it’s me.” She looked up and saw Josh coming towards her. He came up to her and lowered next to her so he could pull her within the safety of his arms. She threw her arms around him and held onto him so tight her hands tingled. How had he known to come?

  “Josh,” she cried into his chest. Then he pulled back and looked her over.

  “Amy, what the hell are you doing in this shithole?”

  She couldn’t talk, she was crying too much.

  “What happened?”

  “They took my stuff, everything is gone.”

  “They? Who is they?” He released her and stood up so he could flick on the light switch, but of course there was no light.

  “They turned off the power.”

  He got out his phone and shined the flashlight on her so he could see her better. She could see his eyes widen when he looked at her face and could only imagine that that hit Dom gave her left a mark.

  “Jesus. Who did this to you?” He held her face.

  “It’s okay. I’m fine.”

  “No. You tell me right now who did this to you and who they are,” he demanded.

  “The landlord and his jerk friends.”

  “Do they live here?”

  She nodded.

  “Okay, pack up what you have left.”

  All she could do was look at him and try to work out what he meant. “What are we doing?”

  “We’re going home, but first we’re going to get the rest of your things back.”

  Amy looked at the stern, very serious expression on his handsome face. She opened her mouth to talk but didn’t know what to comment on first. She didn’t have a home, and going after these guys would be dangerous. Dom had a gun.

  “Home?” she breathed.

  He reached out and held her face and his expression softened a little. “You’re coming home with me, and I’m going to take care of you.”

  That moment was the most safe and secure she’d ever felt in her life. And as she gazed into his eyes she didn’t think she’d ever experienced the warmth and care she felt from anyone. Not even her mother. Her mother tried to take the very best care of her and Tristan, but sometimes she just couldn’t. Sometimes they really had to rough it out. Whether that was the trailer park, or in the back of a car.

  “I’ll take care of you,” he repeated with an assertive nod. “Now come, get it all together and let’s go.”

  “Thank you.” She continued to gaze in his eyes. He took her hand, brought it up to his lips, and kissed her knuckles. She savored the moment for a few brief seconds, then pulled in a sharp breath at the memory of the gun. “Josh, they have a gun. The landlord pointed it at me. You could get hurt.”

  His eyes blazed when he heard that. “Baby you let me worry about that. Come on.”

  Since she didn’t have much to grab they were out of there within minutes. He kept her close as she directed him to Dom’s apartment. Loud music came from inside and it sounded like there was a party going on.

  Josh knocked on the door with so much power the wood shook. The music died down and she could now hear mutterings. They probably thought the police had come.

  Josh knocked again with the same intensity. Dom opened the door.

  “Is this him?” Josh asked her.

  “Yes.”

  Before Dom had the chance to even move and process what was going on, Josh head butted him, sending him straight to the floor in an unconscious heap.

  “Stay back, Amy,” Josh warned.

  She did as he instructed. As he walked into the apartment, two guys rushed him but Josh effortlessly sent them to the ground with his fist. When they tried to get up he hauled them right back. With his height and build they were no match for Josh. She could see why he was called the Mancini Machine, and why he played defense for his team. Nothing and no one could get past him, unless he allowed them to. One guy tried to escape but Josh caught him and lifted him off the ground, holding him by his throat.

  “You and your friends messed with my girl,” Josh balked, squeezing the man’s throat. Amy stood back and watched. It didn’t escape her that Josh just called her his girl, but she was too shaken to think. “I’ll show you a bit of mercy because you weren’t dumb enough to attack me. Give me her things if you want to live.”

  The guy coughed as he tried to speak. “Okay,” he managed.

  Josh dropped him on the ground.

  Amy looked around, there were five of them lying there. She couldn’t believe that Josh had done that and was impressed with his strength. She was impressed that he would defend her, as if she really was his girl.

  The man scrambled off the ground and ran into the backroom. Josh waited for him with asserted dominance. The man brought the sewing machine first
. It seemed like it was intact, probably because they wanted to sell it. He then went back to retrieve her other things and she could see that her mannequin was broken in half and her dress was ruined. All the stones were gone. The material was cut in places and filthy with what looked like grease on it.

  “Is that all of it?” Josh asked.

  “Yes, we sold the rhinestones.”

  A tear ran down Amy’s cheeks when she heard that. She spent a whole month’s salary on those stones.

  While Josh picked up the heavy stuff, she took the bags with her clothes and held her dress.

  “You better hope like hell I don’t see you again,” Josh cautioned the guy who nodded vigorously. “I know you know who I am, you look like you recognize me, and must know I’m bat shit crazy. So don’t fuck with me. Pass the message on.” Josh motioned to Dom and the other men on the floor.

  Amy followed him as he walked out; she tried to stop herself from crying but she couldn’t. The showcase was a month away and this dress had taken her months to make. Not because she couldn’t sew fast or put a dress together quickly. It was simply down to the fact that it was her winning ticket. It was the dress that was supposed to land her the job. She’d spent time designing it with all its intricacies. She didn’t know what she’d do.

  Josh put the stuff in his car then took her into his arms again where she broke down.

  She’d reached that point, that breaking point where she couldn’t take it anymore. It was all too much.

  Chapter 15

  Josh couldn’t have been more sweet and caring towards her. He took her home and fixed up the guest room properly to make sure she was comfortable.

  Amy was grateful to him and his kindness and appreciated that he took time out to make sure she was okay. Or as close to okay as possible. She was devastated about her dress, and really didn’t know what to do.

  Since he gave her the day off she slept in till ten and couldn’t have been more surprised when he came in with a tray of breakfast.

  “You brought me breakfast in bed?” She sat up and smiled at him. She’d never had breakfast in bed before.

  “I did, and you’ll love this.” He looked proud of himself as he placed the tray before her. She looked down at it, narrowed her eyes, and smiled at the amusing display.

  He’d made her pancakes and created smiley faces on top of them with chocolate syrup. There were also little macaroons, like the ones she’d seen in those fancy European stores. These were in the shape of pink unicorns and teddy bears. He’d also made scrambled eggs and toast, which he cut up in triangles. It looked like something you’d give a child.

  “Josh, this looks like a kid’s meal. A very cool kid’s meal.” She couldn’t believe she could laugh, despite her inner turmoil. “How old do you think I am?”

  He gave her that wide-eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look. “Um, is that a question I’m meant to answer?”

  “You can if you want to.” Now she really wondered how old he thought she was.

  He grimaced. “Please just tell me you’re legal because I’m at risk of going to prison if you aren’t.” He looked at her breasts and kept his gaze there. “You’re not wearing a bra are you?”

  “Josh,” she chided him, pulling up the sheets to her chin. No she wasn’t wearing a bra and didn’t normally wear one to bed.

  “I’m sorry. It’s that Italian blood thing again.”

  She giggled. “Anyway, you thought I might not be legal?” There was no way she looked that young.

  “Well you always get all squeamish when I talk about sex and you said you wanted to take things slow, so it occurred to me that maybe that was because you were waiting to turn eighteen. Either that or you escaped from the convent. I hope I’m wrong.”

  She couldn’t believe she was laughing. “Josh, you thought I was either under eighteen, or a nun.”

  He shrugged sheepishly. “Anything can happen these days.”

  She laughed even more. Really laughed, and he did too. “And I’m not squeamish about sex.”

  Mischief filled his eyes. “Have you done it before?”

  Great, now he thought she was a virgin. “If you must know, yes I have. Not as much as you. Definitely not as much as you.”

  “Hey, I can’t help that women crawl all over me. I swear to God some of them just land on me and we just end up doing the wild dance.”

  “Joshua Mancini you better hope the good Lord didn’t hear you just lie through your pearly whites.”

  He looked at her, studying her, and smiled. “You just sounded like Corey. His family is originally from Texas. His southern accent comes out when he’s well and truly annoyed with me.”

  She blinked and looked down at the tray he’d set before her. Amy had lived in New York for so long that her southern drawl had diminished to some extent. Living in Atlanta where there was a good mix of accents meant that hers had never been as strong and pronounced as her mother’s, who was originally from Louisiana.

  It didn’t surprise her to hear that Corey was from Texas. Aside from the hint of an accent she’d detected in his voice, he had the good manners of a southern gentleman.

  Josh continued to observe her, and she knew why. Last night had opened the door to a lot of questions. The biggest of all was what she was doing in an apartment like that in downtown when she worked for him.

  She held his gaze, pulled in a deep breath, and said, “I’m from Atlanta. I moved to New York after college.”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t know that weeks ago.” His eyes never left hers. “I feel really bad that I didn’t try to find out more about you when you helped me through such a tough time. It occurred to me that I don’t even know how old you are.”

  “I’m thirty-three.”

  “You don’t look a day over twenty,” he smiled. He certainly knew how to make a girl feel good, especially when she felt more like a hundred years old.

  “Thank you.”

  “I can continue my wild fantasies now.”

  “Wild fantasies?” She found that hard to believe.

  “Oh yes, but we’ll talk about that another time. If I tell you now and I get lucky with you from my glorious bravery last night, I’ll have to wait till later to find out about you. Also, Hilda wants to come in and see you, and if I get my hands on you it won’t be a quick thing.” He shook his head. “We’ll be at it for hours. Let’s just say the whole day and night. I’d have to send her home.”

  All Amy could do was stare at him with narrowed eyes and her mouth open. It never ceased to amaze her how his mind worked. Also, she knew he wasn’t joking and that’s what fascinated her more. She’d never met anyone who’d speak their mind so freely.

  “So, anyway, tell me, Amy Rose, what made you leave your job in New York to work for the biggest asshole you’ve ever met in your life, with just a sewing machine, a mannequin, and a beautiful red dress that used to have rhinestones?”

  She looked at him and thought about how to answer the question. The simple, short answer was money.

  It twisted her stomach to think of her situation and how he’d feel when he learned her story.

  Amy looked away again and focused her gaze on the sturdy features on the window. He had blinds up in this room as opposed to curtains, and the decoration was quite plain. In the corner was a small wardrobe, a matching chest of drawers, and a desk. Her stuff was next to a box full of weights. All her belongings were in one pile on the floor.

  She looked back to him when he reached out to take a lock of her hair.

  “Tell me, Amy.”

  She shook her head. The more she thought about it, the more awful she felt.

  “Why?”

  “Because I don’t want you to think that it wasn’t real, that I wasn’t real.” A tear ran down her cheek.

  “I have a habit of being able to tell what’s real from not. You’re the real deal, Amy. Let me make it easier for you. I know this job pays really well. I know everything about your job. I guess you needed money
for something, but anything you did for me stopped being about money after the ESPN show. It stopped when you followed me inside after dropping me off and asked me if I was going to drink.”

  His eyes were full of understanding and deep appreciation. He ran his finger along to the side of her cheek and smiled. “Am I right?”

  “Yes.”

  “So now that’s cleared up, you can tell me what’s going on with you.”

  She bit the inside of her lips to prevent herself from crying as she thought about all that was going on with her. “My mom is really sick and needs specialist surgery. She has severe heart disease. I took this job so I could pay for the surgery for her.”

  His eyes filled with sadness as he searched hers. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Josh, you had a lot going on.”

  “But so did you. Do you need more money? Let me help.”

  “No. It’s all okay now.” In few a months she’d receive that fifty thousand and everything would all be okay. It did, however, warm her heart to hear him offer to help. “Thank you, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. But I have everything under control now.”

  “Okay, but let me know if you need me.”

  “I will,” she promised.

  “Until then you’ll stay here. I can’t believe you’d live in that awful place like that. Amy I have a room I keep my shoes in that’s bigger than that dump. You could have just come here.”

  “I can’t stay here, Josh. I couldn’t then and I can’t now. That’s such an imposition.” It was, and she was still trying to deal with her feelings for him.

  “It’s not.” He shook his head.

  “It will be when you want to invite Allegra and bed friends.” She had to be realistic. The man just told her women crawled all over him and it wasn’t his fault if they did the wild dance. “You get all cranky with me when you haven’t had sex in days. God forbid if I was the cause of you not being able to have your little fling parties.”

  She thought he’d make some sort of wise crack about that but he didn’t. He gave her this cautious look and she wasn’t certain what he was thinking.