All In

by Amy DeMeritt

  “Holy shit. How did you figure out how it happened?”

  “The flabby neck skin was still inside the neck of the bottle. It was the most intact piece of the bottle we found. Believe it or not, I’ve seen this before, more than a couple of times. Once, we were called out for someone doing that with a turkey in a turkey fryer.”

  “No, please tell me someone was not that stupid. Were there injuries?”

  “Oh, they were, and yes, there were three fatalities, six more injured, and the entire house was burned beyond repair. That was a horrible Thanksgiving. Come on, babe. Let’s go inside. I’m starving. I need to figure out dinner.”

  “I actually haven’t had dinner yet either. You want to just order something?”

  “Sure, but no chicken or turkey.”

  Erin gives her an understanding smile and leans over to kiss her lips before climbing out of the truck. They walk across the parking lot hand in hand, and after Ashton punches in the passcode to the secure door, she holds it open for Erin to walk in ahead of her.

  “How was your day?”

  “Exhausting as well. I lost a patient today – a fourteen-year old golden retriever. He had a tumor on his liver the size of a softball. There was a very slim chance he could survive the surgery, but the owners wanted to give him a fighting chance and wanted to end his suffering.”

  “Damn, that sounds horrible. I’m sorry, babe.”

  “It was rough. The dog has been a part of that family since their kids were infants and toddlers. He was another member of the family. It’s heartbreaking watching the family fall apart after they lose their beloved pets. I swear, people mourn harder for the loss of their pets than they do for most of their relatives or friends.”

  “Well, I can relate. When Whisper died last year, it felt like my heart broke in half. She was with me nearly half my life. She was the only living creature I could depend on to be there for me every single day.” Ashton’s eyes tear up as she quickly walks in ahead of Erin and tosses her wallet and keys in the wooden bowl on the sidebar. “Anyway, I completely understand where they’re coming from.”

  Internally, she contemplates the reality that a pet is usually more dependable, loyal, loving, and comforting than any human is willing to be. And as if on cue, Ember bounces out from behind the couch and meows as loudly as her tiny vocal cords will allow. Ashton smiles and bends down to scoop her up. She meows again and rubs her head against Ashton’s hands and cheek as Ashton kisses her on the head and neck.

  “Hello, beautiful. How was your first day all alone? Did you destroy anything or make any messes? Babe, I’m going to do a scan of the apartment. Help yourself to a drink.”

  “You want a beer?”

  “Sounds great. Okay, little one, let’s see how you handled your domain today.”

  While Ashton walks around the apartment checking for puddles, poop, and claw marks, she pets Ember and allows her sweet loving kitten to soothe her melancholy with every lick on her fingers and brush of her head against her hands and cheek. She reaches her bathroom to check the shallow plastic container she’s using as a litter box till Ember’s big enough to get into a real one and she smiles. There’s new evidence of use, which makes Ashton release a happy laugh.

  “Now that’s my girl. Look at you using the big girl potty already. Nice work, Ember. I hope your day was better than mine. I guess mine could have been worse. Some damn college kids turned a barbeque into a freaking bomb.” Ashton exhales hard as she sits down on the foot of her bed and pulls her shoes off. “People are really stupid sometimes. But you already know that. You survived the results of someone else’s lethal stupidity. Come on, let’s get you some dinner.”

  As she walks into the kitchen, Erin holds an open bottle of beer out for her. “How did she do today?”

  “Great. I didn’t find any surprises. She used her tiny litter box. She’s doing really good. I’m proud of her.”

  Erin smiles as she pets Ember, eliciting a chorus of humming purrs and meows from her. “Beautiful and smart – you’re the full package, Ember.”

  The comment causes a twinge of longing in Ashton’s chest. It’s sad that only a cat can be the full package in her life, but that’s her reality and has been for the better part of her adult life.

  “What are you hungry for?”

  Ashton shrugs a shoulder as she leans her back against the counter and takes a swig of beer. “I don’t know. I’m too tired to think about it. I sat there on that barstool looking at the menu and I couldn’t even see it. I mean, I saw it, but it just wasn’t registering.”

  Erin runs a hand over her head and reaches up on her toes to kiss her lips. “Go sit down. I’ll figure it out. Give me Ember. I’ll feed her.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “I know, but I want to. Go sit and relax. Put on a movie.”

  She just looks at her unmoving. Erin caresses her cheek and combs her fingers through her short gray hair. “Ash, can we…?” She takes a deep breath and lightly bites her bottom lip for a moment. “Can we try again, you and me? Can we try to be each other’s everything?” She groans and runs a hand over her face. “God, that sounded so corny.”

  Ashton releases a small laugh and pulls Erin into her arms. She kisses her forehead and lips, making her smile with relief. “If that’s really what you want and you’re not just trying to force yourself to settle for me, then I’m all in.”

  “Choosing you would never be settling. Anyone else would be settling. I love you, Ash. I want to be with you.”

  “Alright, then we’re locked down again. Don’t you be showing your perfect ass to no one else.”

  Erin laughs hard and reaches up on her toes to pull Ashton into a deep, fervent kiss. As she releases her, she pats her cheek and takes Ember from her hands.

  “Go rest. I’ll be out after I give Ember her dinner and I order dinner for us.”

  Chapter Five

  Ashton fumbles with the keys in her door with her arms weighed down with groceries, and as she steps inside, she startles. Gloria is standing six feet in front of the door, wearing a bright blue skirt suit with matching high heels, has her hands on her hips, and she looks furious.

  “Damn it, Gloria! What the hell are you doing just standing there like that? What are you even doing here?”

  “Don’t you take that tone with me! A text! That is how you tell me that you are back with Erin? You didn’t even consult with me first?” Ashton rolls her eyes and exhales hard as she pushes past her to get to the kitchen. “Since when have you been talking about getting back together?”

  “About a week.”

  “Why are you doing this? Why didn’t you discuss this with me first?”

  Ashton drops the groceries and spins to face off with Gloria, screaming, “Are you kidding me right now? God, you know…” She throws her arms in the air as she turns around to pick up the groceries off of the floor. “What do you want from me, Gloria?”

  “As the woman you love the most, I think I deserve to have a say in who you…”

  “No. No, you don’t.” She turns back around to face Gloria again. “You don’t get to have a say. You don’t get to choose who I’m with. You’re my best friend. Of all people, you should be in support of me finding someone to love me and spend my life with. Erin and I love each other. We’re great together. We want to see if we can be great together for the rest of our lives. Why would you put that down?”

  Gloria steps over the groceries in her three-inch heels and wraps her arms around the back of Ashton’s neck. Ashton tries to look away from her, but Gloria turns her face and holds it firmly.

  “Is this really what you want? You and Erin have been back and forth for three years. If she couldn’t commit the other times, why do you think she can now?”

  “Where’s the harm in trying? Look, Gloria, I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m not getting any younger. You know the job I have – I don’t know how many years I have left. I just want…” Ashto
n’s jaw tenses as her eyes tear up. She clears her throat and inhales deeply through her nose to dry the tears in her eyes. “I want a shot at the whole package.”

  With compassion in her voice, Gloria asks, “Why didn’t you tell me you were discussing this?”

  “Because I knew you would shoot it down. You have always preferred Erin as my fuck-buddy and not my girlfriend. Why is that? Why do you freak out every time I have a girlfriend?”

  “None of them have been good enough for you.”

  “Who is? You?”

  Gloria scoffs as she takes a step back and puts her hands on her hips. “Don’t take that defensive tone with me, Ashton Maria Hyland! I just want you to be as happy as you can be.”

  “Then give me a damn shot at finding it. Don’t sabotage my relationships.”

  “Excuse me? I have never…”

  “Oh, knock it off, Gloria. You know damn well you sabotage my relationships when you don’t like the woman that I’m with or trying to be with.”

  “Name one time that I…”

  “Lizzy Miller.”

  “Lizzy Miller is a dingbat and you know it. I rescued you from that horrible date.”

  “I never asked to be rescued. You showed up uninvited to spy on my date and pulled me away in the middle of dinner in a very embarrassing scene.”

  “And who thanked me in the parking lot? Yes, that was you, Ashton Maria Hyland. You thanked me, so don’t get all high and mighty with me. You know damn well every one of my judgments have been for your own good.”

  “Stop using my full name like that.” Ashton runs her hands over her face, releasing a long groaning exhale before looking up again, and pleads, “Gloria, I want this to work with Erin. Please don’t do anything to ruin it. Just let it happen naturally. If we end up breaking it off, you can tell me you told me so till you lose your voice.”

  “She’s going to come between us.”

  “How? How is Erin going to come between us? She never has before. But you have come between her and I.”

  “Of course, I have. We’re soulmates, honey! She’s not…”

  “No, stop. Babe, you and I…” She takes a deep breath and places a hand on Gloria’s cheek. “Yes, I love you more than anyone else in the world. But I need a partner. I need a woman who will not only be my soulmate, but will also give me all of her.”

  “I give you…”

  “No, babe, you don’t. We’re not lovers. We’re friends. The scales aren’t supposed to be tilted in your favor when it comes between you and my lover. You’re not supposed to get more say in my life than the woman I’m spending my life with.”

  “I don’t like this.”

  Ashton release a small laugh and tugs on Gloria’s bottom lip that she’s poking out in the biggest pout Ashton has ever seen. “I know. You just need to trust that I would never do anything to jeopardize what you and I have.”

  “Oh, I know you won’t because I will kick your ass back into shape before you can. If you think you are going to…”

  “Woman, shut up.” Gloria scoffs and slaps Ashton’s chest. “Just let me be happy. Let me have the full package – the wonderful best friend and the wonderful girlfriend. Let me have both.”

  “You better make this up to me.”

  “Make what up to you? I haven’t done anything to you.”

  “You didn’t talk to me about this! You went an entire week stewing about this and you didn’t tell me! You should have at least let me lend an ear, even if you muzzled me.”

  Ashton laughs hard, saying, “Don’t tempt me.”

  “How dare you?” She slaps Ashton’s chest again with a pout and crosses her arms over her chest. “Now you have to make it up to me for that too.”

  “You drive me crazy. What do you want me to do to make you happy, babe? And don’t you dare say dump Erin.”

  “I wasn’t going to say that, thank you very much. I want your guarantee that we can still go out together just the two of us. I don’t mind being your third wheel sometimes, but I don’t want Erin tagging along every time we go out.”

  “Erin isn’t a control freak and you know that. Of course, we’ll get to go out just the two of us. But you can’t expect me to drop plans with Erin if you call me last minute.”

  “You are really getting on my nerves with all of these stipulations. Since when am I not your number one woman?”

  Ashton groans deeply as she walks over the discarded groceries on the floor and opens the fridge. She wants to grab a beer, but she’s on-call so she grabs a bottle of iced tea instead.

  “Gloria, unless you are going to act like my number one woman, you can’t be my number one woman.”

  “You know what?” Gloria turns around and opens the cabinet. She pulls out a short glass and a bottle of dark rum. As she pours herself a drink, she continues, very loudly, “Why is everything about sex? And since when do you want to have sex with me? You have never…”

  “I never said that! Gloria, you are being impossible and I don’t know if you’re doing it to fuck with me or if you honestly just can’t understand what I need in life. But you need to…”

  “I understand more than anyone what you need in life! Who is the person who is always here for you after you’ve had a bad day? Me! Who is the person who drops everything when you’re in a life-threatening situation so you will have someone to wrap your arms around when you’re safe again? Me! I cook for you. I grocery shop for you without you asking because I know your schedule is more demanding than mine. I take care of you when you’re injured or sick. I do everything I can to support you and love you. I understand what you need!”

  Ashton steps over the groceries she has yet to be able to put away and tightly wraps her arms around Gloria. After giving her a kiss on the lips, and while lightly caressing her warm cheek, Ashton softly agrees, “You are so wonderful to me, Gloria. You really are. I just need more – I need things that are outside of the scope of our friendship. That doesn’t mean I value you any less. God, Gloria, I love you so damn much it drives me crazy. That’s never going to change. I want and need everything that we have and I want and need everything Erin is offering me.” She gives Gloria a kiss on the forehead, then pleads, “Come on, babe, please trust me.”

  “I get to tell you I told you so when she walks again?”

  Ashton exhales hard as she presses her forehead against Gloria’s. “Yes, if that will make you happy.”

  “No, it won’t make me happy, but it’s what you’ll deserve for not trusting my judgement. I really want you to have the full package. I just don’t think Erin is the one to give it to you. But I won’t say another word about it.”

  “Okay, babe. Do you have to get back to work or do you want to have some lunch with me?”

  “I can stay for lunch.”

  “Good.”

  Ember bounces into the kitchen meowing and paws at Ashton’s shoe. “Well, there you are. Did the screaming scare you? Or did Gloria tuck you away somewhere before I got home?”

  “I resent you for suggesting both of those statements. She was playing with a plush toy when I got here.”

  “You’re always resenting me for something. You drive me crazy.”

  “Shut up, you love me.” Ashton rolls her eyes, and as she bends down to grab a bag of groceries to put away, Gloria asks, “Anyway, do you have any plans with Erin this week?”

  “We’re going on our first official date Friday night.”

  Gloria scoffs, “How many first dates is this now?”

  “Gloria.”

  “Fine. I’m sorry. Go on. Where are you going?”

  “We’re going to dinner at Felicity’s. We might catch a movie afterwards, or just come back here, depending on…”

  Gloria finishes for her, saying, “Depending on how horny Erin is.” She drinks some rum, and adds, “I won’t be surprised if you don’t even make it to dinner.”

  “If you keeping knocking my relationship, I’m going to push you into my shower and turn i
t on and ruin that hair and makeup that I know you spent at least an hour fussing over.”

  Gloria suddenly looks terrified, and snaps back, “You wouldn’t dare! I have clients to meet with this afternoon!”

  “Then behave because you know I’ll do it.”

  “You are so aggravating when you’re in a relationship. So, you’re busy Friday. What about Saturday?”

  “I don’t know yet.”

  “Good. I’m calling dibs on you.”

  Ashton exhales hard as she rolls her eyes and runs her hands through her hair. Gloria is stressing her out and making her feel very overwhelmed.

  “What do you want to do Saturday?”

  “I don’t know yet, but you said you won’t cancel plans with Erin for me. So, I’m booking you in advance for the evening so she can’t.”

  “You are so close to being tossed in the shower right now.”

  “Hey, I’m playing by your rules! Anyway, tell me how this happened – how it came up and what you discussed.”

  While Ashton puts her groceries away and fixes them lunch, she tells her about the conversations she has had with Erin this week. Which, of course, causes many outbursts from Gloria because Ashton doesn’t hold back the fact that Erin is concerned about Gloria coming between them. Even though Ashton keeps reassuring her that they’re not going to drift apart and begs her to just trust her, Gloria remains bitter about the changes and acts wounded.

  “Okay, you get one minute to say what you want to say about me getting back together with Erin, then we’re changing the subject.” She sets a stopwatch timer on her phone, then adds, “And if you say one more word about it after the minute is up, I promise you I am dragging you to the shower. All of those glorious curls of yours are going to be flattened out and your makeup is going to run down your face like a washed-out painting.”

  “You are just evil for threatening a woman like me with such a thing! You have no idea the effort it takes to put this together.”