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The Getaway (Diary of a Wimpy Kid Book 12)

Page 7

by Jeff Kinney


  to watch the baby turtles hatch was because

  they’re CUTE.

  Trust me, if this was a SNAKE hatching, it

  would be a totally different situation.

  Just when I was getting ready to tell Mom we

  should give up and go back to our room, the eggs

  started hatching one by one.

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  Everybody got really excited, but the nature guide

  told us to stay quiet and get out of the way. She

  said the turtles find their way to the ocean by

  seeing the moonlight reflecting on the water.

  But everyone ignored the nature guide and turned

  on their cell phones, and the camera lights made

  the turtles go every which way.

  Mom was really enthusiastic, because she said we

  were witnessing the “miracle of life.” She asked

  where Rodrick was, but no one knew. Dad said

  the last time he saw Rodrick, he was in the tall

  grass in the dunes.

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  And that’s where we found him.

  That SHOULD’VE been the end of the night,

  but it wasn’t. When we got back to the room, we

  found out that Manny had pocketed one of the

  baby turtles while no one was looking, so Dad had to

  bring it all the way back to the beach to set it free.

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  Thursday

  I guess Mom wasn’t too happy with the way our

  family vacation was going so far, because after

  breakfast she said she was gonna take a “spa day.”

  That sounded like a GREAT idea to me, and I

  told Mom I was gonna tag along. I’ve always

  wanted to get a massage, and I figured this was

  my big chance.

  But Mom said she needed time to HERSELF and

  the rest of us were on our own. That meant WE

  had to watch Manny.

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  Once Mom left, the three of us tried to figure

  out what to do. Manny was too much to handle,

  so I suggested we just drop him off at the

  Toddlers’ Cabana and let the people who worked

  there deal with him.

  Dad liked that idea, because he said he wanted

  to get in a workout at the gym. He told me and

  Rodrick we were responsible for getting Manny to

  the Toddlers’ Cabana, and then he left.

  The path took us right past the wall that

  separated our half from the Wild Side. I guess

  some kids were trying to get a peek at what was

  over there, but the landscapers put a stop to it.

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  I asked Rodrick what he thought was on the

  other side, and he said he already KNEW. He

  said some of his friends in the Teen Zone told

  him that all SORTS of crazy stuff goes on

  over there and there’s even a beach where people

  sunbathe without any clothes on.

  He said there’s a HOLE in the wall and if you look

  through it, you can see the other side. But I

  knew Rodrick was just trying to trick me, because

  he’s told me this kind of thing BEFORE.

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  One summer when we were at the town pool, he

  told me that if I peeked over this cinderblock

  wall, I could see into the ladies’ locker room.

  Well, I BELIEVED him, and I’ve been trying to

  erase that image from my mind ever since.

  We brought Manny to the Toddlers’ Cabana,

  and the kids inside were making puppets. I told

  the person in charge we were dropping our little

  brother off for the day and we’d be back later.

  The counselor said the only requirement for a

  drop-off was that the kid was potty-trained,

  and I told him that Manny WAS.

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  But Manny must really not have wanted to make

  puppets, because he got himself out of it.

  Rodrick said I had to watch Manny by MYSELF,

  because he was gonna go check out the activities

  in the Teen Zone. But I knew he was just going

  there to meet up with that girl.

  I was not happy that I got stuck with Manny.

  I didn’t want to take him to the beach, because

  he’d just start collecting pets again.

  So I took him to the Pirate Playplace, which was

  a splash zone for little kids.

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  It was actually PERFECT, because I could

  relax on a lounge chair and keep an eye on Manny

  while he played. I even ordered a grilled cheese

  sandwich and some french fries from a waiter who

  came by.

  But I wasn’t able to enjoy my meal. Some kids on

  the miniature pirate ship figured out that if they

  blocked one of the water cannons, they could make

  the other one shoot TWICE as far.

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  So I had to move to a lounge chair that was

  farther away. But when I sat down, I realized

  I had lost track of MANNY. I eventually

  spotted him in the middle of the wading pool, all

  by himself.

  I knew I had to go in there and get him, but I

  really didn’t WANT to. With the number of little

  kids in the pool, I knew EXACTLY what was in

  that water.

  When I was little, I used to pee in the baby pool

  all the TIME. In fact, there’s a framed photo of

  me in the family room using the pool as a potty.

  Mom says it’s her favorite picture of me, because

  I look so HAPPY. But I’ve never told her WHY.

  One summer, they put some chemical in the pool

  that turned green if anyone peed. So that put an

  end to THAT.

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  I needed to figure out a way to get to Manny

  without touching the water, so I found a raft

  and a pool noodle and paddled out to him.

  But I only made it halfway across when a bunch

  of little kids decided it would be fun to climb onto

  my raft. I tried fighting them off with the

  noodle, but there were just too MANY of them.

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  Then they teamed up to flip me OVER.

  I got Manny out of the pool and then spent

  twenty minutes scrubbing every inch of my body in

  the outdoor shower.

  But five seconds after I finished drying off,

  I was WET again. The kids in the pirate ship

  figured out that if they plugged TWO cannons,

  they could get some SERIOUS range.

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  While I was drying off a SECOND time, we

  bumped into Mom. And after her morning at the

  spa, she seemed like a whole new person.

  She said that while she was getting her massage,

  she came up with a GREAT idea for how we could

  spend time as a family. She booked a private cruise

  for all of us, and she said the boat was gonna be

  at the dock in half an hour.

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  That wasn’t a lot of time, so we had to split up

  to track down Dad and Rodrick. I told Mom

  that Dad was at the gym, so she went there to

  get him.

  I found Rodrick exactly where I expected to,

  and believe me, he owes me for not letting Mom

  get to him FIRST.

  We met Mom and Dad down at the dock. Dad

  wasn’t too happy with Mom, because apparently

  this boat cost a lot o
f money to rent. But Mom

  said it was WORTH it, because this cruise was

  gonna be the highlight of our trip.

  When I hear the word “cruise,” I think of a

  yacht or at least a souped-up sailboat.

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  But the boat that Mom rented didn’t look like

  anything special.

  The boat came with its own captain, so I guess

  that was SOMETHING. When we got on board,

  he handed us all life jackets, and after we put

  them on, we pulled away from the dock.

  The first thing I noticed was that the boat had

  a glass bottom, which I was not comfortable with

  at ALL.

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  This boat didn’t look like it was in such great

  shape to begin with, so I was worried the glass

  was gonna crack and we were all gonna sink to

  the bottom of the ocean.

  In fact, if I had to guess, I’ll bet 50% of all

  shipwrecks are glass-bottom boats just like the

  one we were on.

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  Once we got out on the ocean, the captain asked

  Mom where she wanted to go. The captain said

  there were some private islands we could explore,

  and Mom said we should go to one of THOSE.

  But it turned out the “private” islands weren’t

  really private, so we didn’t bother sticking around.

  The captain said there was a reef nearby that

  wasn’t usually crowded and we could do some

  snorkeling.

  That meant we’d have to go into the actual ocean

  with all the OTHER stuff swimming around in

  there, so I wasn’t in love with the idea. But

  nobody else seemed concerned.

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  Once we got out to the reef, the captain dropped

  anchor, and he handed us each a snorkel, a mask,

  and some flippers.

  I asked if he had any HARPOONS or other

  weapons that we could use to defend ourselves

  from sharks.

  He said sharks don’t go near the reefs, but I said

  I’d bet if they saw a defenseless family splashing

  around, they’d be happy to make an exception.

  He told us the reason that sharks don’t come near

  the reefs is that the coral is SHARP and that

  WE shouldn’t touch it, either.

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  That was the FIRST red flag. But it got a

  whole lot WORSE.

  He said there was a pretty good chance we’d see

  some stingrays underwater. He said it was OK to

  touch their fins but we should keep our thumbs

  away from their mouths, because they can mistake

  them for food and bite them clean off.

  Then he said the stingrays’ tails are poisonous, so

  we should probably watch out for THOSE, too.

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  The captain wasn’t FINISHED, though. He

  said there were a bunch of OTHER things we

  needed to look out for. Then he showed us what

  everything looked like on a big chart.

  There was some scary stuff on that thing, but it

  wasn’t the BIGGEST creatures that freaked me

  out, it was the SMALLEST one. And that was

  the BOX JELLYFISH.

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  I saw this show called “World’s Most Venomous

  Creatures,” and they had the box jellyfish at

  the top of the list. If you get stung by one,

  your heart can stop, and then you’re pretty

  much finished.

  I told Mom I didn’t think it was worth risking

  death just to see a goldfish in the wild. I think

  she could tell I was worried, but she wouldn’t let

  me off the hook that easy.

  She said I just needed to get in the water long

  enough to take one family picture and then I

  could get back in the boat.

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  Mom still wanted that photo for the Christmas

  card, and I could tell she wasn’t gonna take “no”

  for an answer.

  I told Mom I’d stay in just long enough for

  ONE picture, and if someone BLINKED, that

  was just tough luck. She agreed, and then we got

  in the water one by one. I was the last person in.

  The captain couldn’t figure out how to work Mom’s

  camera, and he was taking FOREVER.

  I really didn’t like the feeling of not knowing

  what was swimming underneath me, so I took a

  peek underwater. I’m glad I did, because it was

  actually kind of AMAZING. I could see why

  people liked snorkeling and scuba diving so much.

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  A big school of blue and green fish surrounded

  me, and the fish were darting all over the place,

  changing directions two times a second.

  At first I thought it was COOL, but then

  I realized that this is how animals behave when

  they’re trying to avoid a PREDATOR.

  I didn’t see any sharks underwater, so I started

  scanning the surface for FINS.

  The captain finally figured out Mom’s camera and

  was ready to take our picture, but I was already

  swimming for the boat.

  Just then, a sea horse swam right in front of

  my mask, and it surprised me. My snorkel dipped

  beneath the surface, and I accidentally took a

  HUGE gulp of water. And I’m 95% sure that I

  swallowed the sea horse along WITH it.

  Now I was in a full-blown panic. I think I

 

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