Always (A Ditched novella)

by Amity Hope

  “Well,” she said with a sigh, “there are worse problems to have than a guy who is an absolute sweetheart who loves you.”

  Her tone set off mental alarm bells and my feet came to a sudden halt.

  “Lanna,” I carefully began, “what’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” she said too quickly.

  “Lanna…?” I turned her name into a multi-syllable question.

  “It’s just—” She cut herself off to say, “Nothing. It’s nothing I want to talk about.”

  My concern instantly kicked in. “You know you can talk to me about anything. Is it your mom and Gerald?” That was an educated guess that stemmed from past experience with Lanna’s string of step-dads.

  “Well, those two certainly don’t help. I had forgotten how much I hate living at home. I’ve been thinking about moving out,” she said.

  “So why don’t you?” I asked. I knew that money wasn’t really a problem for her. She had a sizable trust fund.

  “Because I’m not sure how much longer I’m going to be sticking around Chamberlain. I have had enough of this damn town.” Her tone had taken on a questioning lilt. As if somewhere, hidden in her statement, was a question. I could almost picture her face, scrunched up in quizzical apprehension. I hoped her statement meant what I thought it did.

  I perked up at the news. “Really? Where are you going to go? You had better say you’re coming here!”

  “I,” she said slowly, “am definitely thinking about it.”

  I let out a little squeal of excitement. “Oh, Lanna! You should! I’ve missed you so much. Max would love to see you!” And if something was bothering her, which it clearly was, I would have a much better chance of getting to the bottom of it if I saw her in person.

  “Really?” she asked hesitantly. “I mean, I know you’ve offered before. But I don’t want to intrude.”

  “You would not be intruding! Oh my gosh, Lanna! You would love it here! We would have so much fun. I promise. Please tell me you’ll come!”

  My enthusiasm pried a laugh out of her. “Yes, I would love to take a trip to California.”

  “When?” I wanted to know. I was smiling so hugely that my cheeks hurt.

  “Soon. There are a few things that I have to take care of. I need to clear it with my job and…Well, I guess that’s it. I need to take care of things at work,” she said.

  We chatted for awhile longer. My nervousness over the predicament with the ring was eclipsed by the knowledge that I would see Lanna soon. Growing up, we’d been inseparable. Then to my surprise, she’d chosen to leave the country for a year. As she’d said, I moved to California right around the time she’d moved back to Chamberlain. The result was that I’d barely seen her the last two years. I missed her terribly.

  ~*~*~

  “My jewelry is missing!” I exclaimed as I shot out onto the deck.

  Max was sitting at the table with a notebook. He was finalizing a new distribution plan for when the winery reopened Monday morning. The eraser end of the pencil tapped rapidly against the table as he looked up at me. He hadn’t been home for very long. Since the weather was so nice he’d decided to tackle some work while sitting outside. I planned on joining him but needed to sort out my bowl of beads first. When I went into the spare room, it took me a few moments to realize my jewelry was gone.

  “The box I keep them in? It’s gone!” I said when he didn’t look alarmed at my initial proclamation.

  “Oh,” he said as he cringed, “don’t worry. I know where it is.”

  “Where?” I demanded. “Did you move it? Was it in your way?” Almost every piece of jewelry that I’d been working on the past few months was stashed inside of my large tote. I had spent days working on the new charm sets for wineglasses. All in all, I had weeks’ worth of time invested in that box. “Where are they?” I asked again when he hesitated.

  He cleared his throat and dropped his pencil onto his notebook. He scrunched up his face apologetically. “I, uh, I borrowed them to Clarissa.”

  I had to have heard him wrong. “You did what?”

  “I borrowed them to Clarissa. That’s okay, right? She stopped by after class today, before I headed out to the winery. She wanted to see them so…” He faded off. I could tell by the expression on his face that he knew he might’ve crossed a line. “I let her take the tote. To look through.”

  “All of them? You let her take all of them? Why would you do that? Do you know how many hours I have invested? That tote held my entire collection. Why would you give them to her?” Why would he give them to anyone?! Least of all her? My chest heaved in frustration. This girl? I had had it with her.

  “Are you mad?” he asked with a frown.

  I threw my hands up in the air. “A little bit!”

  “What? Why? She just wanted to look them all over. You know she loves your designs. I think…I think she wanted to buy some.”

  “You think…” I didn’t understand what he was thinking. I took a deep breath. Max and I had only fought one time. I had hated every second of it. We’d disagree sometimes, sure. The other night, in fact. But we didn’t fight. What we were doing now felt awfully close to a fight. I didn’t want it to turn into a full blown argument. Not over Clarissa. “Why didn’t she just look at them here?” I couldn’t believe he’d let her take them. All of them! What if she lost them? I didn’t know how that would happen but it was possible.

  Another nagging little thought crept into my mind. What was she doing here in the first place? And how often did she stop by when I wasn’t home? I didn’t want to think about that.

  “How would you feel if I handed Lanna your car keys?” I asked as I crossed my arms over my chest.

  He grimaced as understanding washed across his face. Max was very protective of his car. He did not let other people drive it. That usually included me. I could count on one hand the number of times I’d driven his car. He would not be happy with me if I passed it off to Lanna. I felt the same way about my jewelry simply because I had so much of myself invested in it.

  “I get it. It was a bad call. But she started looking through them. There were so many,” he began.

  “Why was she even here in the first place?” I felt a little bit like we were standing on the precipice of an argument. I knew I should take a step back, I just couldn’t. “Max! I can’t believe you let her take them! She probably doesn’t even want to see my jewelry. She probably just used them as an excuse to come over and see you!”

  He shook his head. “Not this again. Holly, I’ve known Clarissa since forever. She’s like a sister to me. Like a little sister. I have never thought of her as anything other than a good friend. And I never will.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut and tilted my face skyward. I believed him. However, I was pretty damn sure that Clarissa didn’t picture him as her big brother. Far from it. But as long as Max didn’t reciprocate, did it really matter? She was a nuisance, sure. And I was not happy that he borrowed my jewelry to her without asking me. On the other hand, I was sure he had no idea how upset I would be. Maybe, just maybe I was overreacting. Max was right. I would be getting it back.

  I just felt a little lost without it.

  “Okay, fine,” I said as I took control of my emotions. “But next time, please do not give my jewelry to anyone. Not without checking with me.”

  He gave me a little nod. “Right. Of course. I don’t know what I was thinking. But you have nothing to worry about. She’ll take good care of it.”

  “If you say so,” I muttered.

  He arched his eyebrows at me. “So you and me? Are we good?”

  I nodded. “Yes, we’re fine.”

  He smiled but it looked a little force. “Are you going to sit down?”

  It was an unusually warm day. We didn’t sit out on the deck much this time of year.

  I nodded. “Yeah. I was going to organize my beads but that can wait. Let me go grab a textbook and I’ll be right out.”

  I slipped back into the
house. Max was a smart guy. I didn’t understand how he couldn’t see that Clarissa was turning into a problem. However, I was already finding that when I tried to argue my point, it just made him more determined to refute me.

  I found my textbook on the coffee table and swiped it up. Max was home for the afternoon. He was in the final stages of wrapping things up at the winery. There should be no more interruptions for today. Finally, I had him all to myself. I wanted to make the most of the time. That meant not arguing about Clarissa or anything else.

  We had more important things to discuss. Like Lanna’s visit. I had asked him months ago if he’d mind, before I first invited her. He’d told me she was welcome anytime. I had figured that’s what he would say because he and Lanna had been friends for years too. She was the reason I’d ended up in Harmony Bay. It was only at her insistence that I’d let Max whisk me away. If not for Lanna, there was a very good chance that Max and I wouldn’t have had the chance to work out our feelings for each other.

  Thinking of her brought a smile to my face.

  I shoved my feelings of irritation aside. I was going to go outside and apologize to Max for losing my temper. I was going to suggest that later, we take a walk on the beach. Maybe even go out to dinner at the nice ocean side restaurant he’d taken me to when I’d first arrived in Harmony Bay. I was not going to bother him with my worries about Clarissa anymore.

  As I crossed the kitchen on my way back outside, I told myself that it would probably be best if I just completely ignored this problem.

  Maybe this would be one of the rare times that if a problem was ignored, it would fizzle away.

  Max’s phone buzzed against the kitchen counter top. It was in its usual place, charging. I picked it up, initially planning to walk it back outside to him. I let out a groan because maybe the problem wouldn’t go away.

  I was not shocked to see Clarissa’s name glowing back at me, yet again. This time, instead of a text, she was actually calling.

  I hesitated only a moment before answering. “Hey, Clarissa, this is Holly.” I could hear the tension in my voice. “Did you need something?”

  I was met by a moment of silence.

  “Is…Is Max around?” she finally asked.

  “Yes.” I strummed my fingers against the countertop.

  After several moments of prolonged silence, she finally said. “Can I talk to him?”

  “Actually, no,” I said as I turned to look out the sliding glass door. His head was bowed over his notebook again. “He’s busy right now.”

  “Oh. I’ll call back later.” Her tone was so cheery it made me roll my eyes.

  “Why don’t you just tell me what you want?” It came out sounding more like a command than a suggestion.

  “That’s okay. I really need to just talk to him myself. So if you could just let him know I called…?”

  I couldn’t stop the exasperated sigh that shot out of my mouth. “I think you’ve been talking to Max plenty. You are always either calling, texting, or stopping by. It seems like you’ve been looking for any reason you can find to get Max’s attention.” My tone flared with anger and I immediately tamped it down. I didn’t want to make her feel bad. It wasn’t her fault that she had a crush on Max. I knew firsthand how hard he could be to resist. At the same time, enough was enough. “I think maybe you should find some other guy to pay so much attention to.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Max has a girlfriend,” I said, stating the obvious. “And I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Holly—”

  “No, listen Clarissa. I like you. I do. But the phone calls and the texts, just stopping by whenever you feel like it, it’s getting to be too much. And my jewelry? I want it back. In fact, I want it back right now. Max had no right to give it to you without asking me first. I’m home for the rest of the afternoon so you can drop it off. The sooner, the better.”

  This time, I was met with silence.

  “Clarissa? Seriously, I’d like you to bring it all back. Today,” I pressed.

  “Oh! Paige is here. I’ve got to run!”

  The phone went dead in my ear.

  She did not just hang up on me!

  Only yes, she had.

  CHAPTER ten

  I had never had a truly memorable Valentine’s Day. I’d been with Collin for several years, on and off. Coincidentally, it seemed that most years, we were off over that particular holiday. The year that we were together, he hadn’t thought we’d need reservations to eat out. We’d ended up at a fast food restaurant. I guess maybe it did make for a memorable night. Just not memorable in a good way.

  I had already decided that no matter what, I was going to push away all thoughts of Clarissa tonight. I was even going to push aside the irritation I felt over the fact that she had not brought my jewelry back, even though I’d asked her to.

  I tilted my head to the side and decided I was satisfied with the hairstyle I’d chosen. I was keeping it simple with the sides pulled back and the ends curled. I had applied a light layer of make-up. One final look in the mirror and I knew I was as good as I was going to get for tonight.

  My stomach fluttered nervously. Last night had been nearly perfect. After we both finished our homework, we’d spent over an hour walking on the beach. We’d eaten dinner at home. Then we’d sat out on the porch swing, huddled together under a blanket, drinking hot cocoa and talking as we listened to the waves rolling in.

  I had no doubt that I loved Max. But every now and again, I felt almost overwhelmed by the strength of it. Last night was one of those nights.

  I found him waiting for me in the kitchen. He was texting as I walked in. I had a hunch I knew exactly who he was texting with but I was not going to ask.

  “Hey pretty girl,” he said as he shoved his phone into his pocket.

  “Hey, yourself,” I said with a smile.

  I walked into his arms, tilting my face up to his. I slid my arms around his waist. His hands gently cupped my cheeks as his loving green eyes latched onto mine. Sometimes, I felt like I could see all the way into his soul when he looked at me the way he was looking at me right now.

  His thumbs brushed across my cheekbones and my knees went weak.

  “I want you to know that I appreciate how patient you’ve been with me lately. I know I’ve been really distracted. But the renovation is done,” he said quietly. “And I’d like to show it to you.”

  I smiled, excitedly. “I’d love to see it!”

  “Good because I plan on taking you to the winery tonight. I think it’ll help you understand why I’ve been so busy. And I think it’ll clear up other…things.”

  I was about to ask what he meant by that but he hushed me with a kiss. His hands slid down, cupping my backside as he pulled me in closer. I melted into him, enjoying every second of the kiss while it lasted.

  “Do you want to open your gift now or later?” I asked. Paige had dropped it off earlier in the day. Bless her heart. She’d even scrounged up a box big enough to put it in. I had wrapped it carefully and in a fashion that would allow Max to open it from the top. That way it wouldn’t get jostled around. I did not want that work of art to get damaged.

  “I assume my gift is that monster sized box you have sitting in the middle of the living room floor,” he said, his eyes twinkling in amusement. “I think I want to open it now.”

  With his hand in mine, I tugged him into the living room. He lifted the box onto the couch.

  “Careful,” I said. I would hope that since it was welded together it would be just fine. But I didn’t want to take any chances.

  He glanced at me and raised his eyebrows as he carefully peeled the paper back. Next, he unfolded the flaps on the top of the box. His brow furrowed for just a moment and then he reached inside to pull out the frilled lizard.

  He started laughing at the sight of it.

  “I can’t believe you got me this!”

  “It’s not the same as the one at the art fair,” I pointed out. �
��But it’s close.”

  He was still laughing when he said, “I see that. But I also saw the look on your face that day. I thought you hated the sculpture. You looked really relieved that it had already sold.”

  “I didn’t hate it,” I hedged.

  “Yes,” he said, “you did.”

  I shrugged but laughed a little as well. “Okay. Maybe I hated it just a little. But you seemed to like it so much. You were so disappointed that you couldn’t have it. I guess the thought kind of grew on me.”

  He held it out at arm’s length, firmly gripping it in both hands while he inspected it. “Well, I think this is awesome. So thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  “Would you mind if I brought it to work with me? It would look great on the table in the corner of my office. Unless you want me to keep it here?”

  “No,” I said with a quick little shake of my head. “You can definitely bring it to your office with you.”

  “You can’t have your present until later.”

  I bit my lip nervously for a second before saying, “That’s fine.”

  He reached for my hand. “Ready?”

  I nodded. I was as ready as I could possibly be. Lanna was right. If Max proposed tonight, I could suggest a long engagement. A year or four would probably be good. I could do this. I could say “yes”.

  Then we could wait.

  ~*~*~

  “Is that—” I cut myself off. I had been going to ask if it was Clarissa’s car parked in the back of the winery. In the employee parking lot. I didn’t have to ask because I knew it was. I was not going to be annoyed by this.

  “Yeah, that’s Clarissa,” Max said easily.

  I smiled and nodded as I tried to tune out the barrage of questions that were blasting through my mind. First of all, why was she at the winery? It was supposed to be closed. Was she checking out the renovations? My irritation sparked because I hadn’t seen it yet. It seemed unfair that she got to see it first. But really, that all came back to …why was she here? And did she have a key? She must have a key. Why would she have a key?!