In My Heart

by E. L. Todd

  “No.”

  “Are you lying to me?” I asked. “I need to know the truth.”

  “It’s nothing like that.” She looked me in the eye as she said it, showing her truthfulness. “Your baby is fine. It has nothing to do with that.”

  Relief washed through me. If our baby was okay then we could get through anything else. “Then the real reason is nothing compared to that. She and I can get through it. It doesn’t matter what it is.”

  Skye looked at the ground again.

  “Tell me, Skye.”

  “I can’t betray her trust…”

  “Did she cheat on me…?” Saying it out loud didn’t feel right. Trinity wouldn’t do that to me. “Because if she did, we can work on that too.” Even if that really happened I loved her too much to let her go, as pathetic as that made me sound. “I’m not going to be mad. I just need to know how to be there for her.”

  Skye ran her fingers through her hair anxiously. “Slade, I can’t tell you. I told you it had nothing to do with your baby because I wasn’t going to make you suffer over that. But I can’t say anything more.”

  “Skye.” I pleaded with my eyes. “Please. Look, I’m begging you right now.”

  “I’m sorry…”

  “I took care of you when Cayson was gone. Neither one of you asked me to do that. I was there for you when War Chief was sick. I’m his godfather, for crying out loud. I’ve been here for both of you every single day. Skye, you owe me. You owe me big.”

  She rubbed her temple and looked like she was about to be crushed from the pressure.

  “Goddammit, Skye. Tell me.”

  “I can’t…”

  “What would you do if this was Cayson?” I asked. “If Cayson was desperate to know what was wrong with you? How do you think he would feel right now?”

  “I know this is hard for you…”

  “I’m not trying to be nosey or invade her privacy. I know something is wrong with her. It’s my job to fix it. But I can’t help her because she won’t let me. Skye, I need you. I need you more than I ever have in my life. As a good friend to Trinity, you should tell me. That’s the right thing to do.”

  Skye looked at the ground.

  I turned to Cayson. “Help me.”

  “I swear I don’t know anything,” he said. “Skye told me they talked about pregnancy and that was it.”

  Cayson wouldn’t lie to me so I accepted his story without question. “Convince Skye to tell me.”

  “You act like that’s so easy,” he said.

  “Just try,” I said. “For me.”

  “Um, okay.” He rubbed the back of his neck and stared at Skye. “I don’t know what happened with Trinity, but if Slade is right and she’s really spiraling out of control then she needs some kind of intervention. I understand you want to remain loyal to Trinity, but if there’s something seriously wrong with her you should speak up. Trinity needs help. How can Slade do that if she shut him out?”

  Skye finally looked at him. “It’s so much more complicated than that…”

  “Then tell me and I’ll decide if Slade should know,” Cayson said.

  “Yes,” I interjected. “I like that idea.” Cayson would sympathize with me and tell me everything.

  “You’ll take his side no matter what,” Skye said.

  “I won’t,” Cayson said. “I’ll be objective. I promise.”

  “If you don’t think he should know you’ll tell him anyway,” Skye argued.

  “I swear I won’t,” Cayson said.

  Skye crossed her arms over her chest and shifted her weight.

  “Skye, just spit it out.” I wanted to demolish their house to get her to comply. “I’m not leaving until I get an answer. That’s final. So unless you want me as a roommate you better tell me.”

  “Slade,” Skye said. “What if things were switched? What if I was asking you something about Cayson but you promised him you wouldn’t say anything? You don’t understand how difficult this is.”

  “I get it,” I said. “I really do. But I genuinely think Trinity needs help.”

  “You would never betray Cayson.”

  “I would if he was in serious shit,” I said. “If Trinity is in some serious shit you need to tell me. Just ask yourself that.”

  Skye’s eyes fell.

  “Then you need to fess up.”

  “Ugh.” She covered her face and slowly pulled her hands down her cheeks. “I don’t want to tell you…it’s so hard.”

  “Just do it,” I said. “Don’t think about it.”

  “It’s just…I know how much this is going to hurt you. Every time I think about it…” Her eyes started to well up with tears. “I want to break down.”

  Fuck, this was bad.

  “You have to stay calm, Slade. You can’t run out and kill someone.”

  Why would I kill someone? “Just tell me.”

  She blinked her eyes quickly until the tears were gone. “Before I say anything, I want it to be understood that I told her to go to the police. I also told her she needed to tell you.”

  Now my heart filled with dread. What could have possibly happened? What was Skye about to tell me? “Skye, the anticipation is killing me. Just rip off the bandage and tell me.”

  “Okay.” She pressed her palms together and took a deep breath before she spoke.

  My hands were shaking.

  “Okay…did Trinity say anything about Maximum Shot?”

  I just saw him at the office. “She said she was working with him.”

  “And that’s it?” she whispered.

  “Yes…”

  “Trinity said it seemed like he was coming onto her. He invited her to dinner and to his place but she kept saying she was married and expecting a baby in a few months. That didn’t seem to matter to him. They saw each other a few times more and Trinity realized his intentions toward her were anything but professional, so she told him their collaboration was over.”

  My heart ached because it was beating so fast. My head was starting to spin. My stomach clenched tightly in agony. I wasn’t sure if I could handle whatever she was going to say.

  “She was working late one afternoon and he stopped by…” She closed her eyes like she didn’t want to finish. “And then he made her—”

  The pieces fell together and I saw the big picture. I understood what happened to my wife. That son-of-a-bitch touched her, made her did things against her will. “Stop.” I raised my hand because I couldn’t take another word. My entire body felt ice cold, like I would never feel happy ever again. My heart broke into a million pieces, feeling exactly what Trinity felt in that moment. My knees buckled underneath me and hit the hardwood floor. I covered my face because the pain was too much.

  Now everything made sense. I understood why Trinity was repulsed by my touch. I understood why sex was off the table. She didn’t go to work anymore because she didn’t want to risk the possibility of seeing him. All her drive and determination was ruined by that scumbag. She was scared, terrified of leaving her own apartment. She was scarred in ways medicine couldn’t heal. She was violated and I didn’t protect her.

  I didn’t protect her.

  Without realizing it, my hands were soaked in tears. My chest was heaving from the agony. Everything hurt. I had crumbled to the floor because the weight of my grief was too much.

  Cayson came beside me and placed his hand on my back. He didn’t say anything because there was nothing he could say.

  Skye sobbed a few feet away, feeling exactly what I felt.

  “I didn’t protect her,” I whispered.

  Cayson rubbed my back.

  “I failed her.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Sean

  I walked inside the strip club and pushed through the crowd. The music played overhead and the strobe lights danced on the wall. Topless waitresses walked by, carrying trays of drinks.

  I ignored all the perverts in there and immediately headed to the stage.

 
Angie was on the far left, working the pole like she actually enjoyed it. She only wore underwear because her bra had been removed earlier in the show.

  I grabbed her by the wrist and yanked her off the stage.

  “What are you—” She halted in midsentence when she recognized my face.

  Keeping my eyes locked to her face I took off my jacket and wrapped it around her, making sure her chest was covered and no longer visible to the crowd. “Let’s go.”

  “Go where?”

  “Anywhere but here.”

  “I work here,” she said. “I can’t just leave.”

  “You don’t work here anymore.”

  “Mr. Preston—”

  “You’re coming even if I have to throw you over the back of my shoulder.” I grabbed her wrist and pulled her with me.

  Her manager came over, flanked by two bouncers. “No touching allowed.”

  “Angie is giving her notice,” I said calmly. “She won’t be working here anymore.”

  The bouncer on the left immediately reached for me, but I swiped his hit with my forearm then punched him hard in the nose. The other bouncer made his move while I was in mid-punch so I kneed him in the stomach then elbowed him hard in the face. He went down just like the first.

  The manager stepped back slightly. “I don’t want to call the cops.”

  “You don’t have to,” I said. “We were just leaving.”

  ***

  We left the strip club and reached my car at the curb. She still had the jacket wrapped around her because she hadn’t had the time to grab her fallen garments. She sat in the passenger seat, her eyes on the center console. “Mr. Preston, what are you doing?”

  “You aren’t working there anymore,” I said. “It’s no place for a young woman.”

  “Even though my mom is taken care of I still need money. This is all I have right now.”

  “This is what’s going to happen,” I said. “You’re going to go back to college.”

  “I already dropped out…”

  “You can enroll next semester.”

  “I doubt they’ll take me back,” she whispered. “I dropped out in the middle of the semester and got all F’s.”

  “I’ll work it out with them.”

  She turned her face my way and stared at me. “What…?”

  “I know the president of the university. He’ll make an exception.” I donated a lot of money to their campus so they better make an exception.

  “That’s sweet and everything but…I can’t afford college anymore. I lost my scholarship when I dropped out.”

  “Scarlet and I don’t mind paying for it.”

  Her eyes grew to the size of melons. “Are you kidding me?”

  “Not even a little.”

  “Uh, I can’t accept that. That’s really nice of you to offer but—”

  “It’s not up for debate.” I rested my hands on my thighs as I stared at her. “You seem like a good kid who’s in a terrible situation. If you had the right kind of help I think you could get your life back on track.”

  Disbelief was prominent in her eyes. “I lied to the whole country and said you were a pig…why on earth would you help me?”

  “You already apologized for that. I forgave you.”

  “Even so…I don’t deserve your kindness.”

  “Everyone deserves help when they need it.” As a Preston I never understood what it was like to be hungry, to wonder where your next meal was coming from, or having to worry about money. My life would have been much different if that weren’t the case.

  “Well, I don’t. Just because I apologized doesn’t mean it never happened.”

  “Lucky for you, I’m not one to hold a grudge.” I gave her a slight smile. “Anyone would have done what you had in that situation. I don’t judge you for it.”

  She bowed her head, as if she was ashamed.

  “Scarlet and I want to help you. It’s clear you’re all alone right now.”

  “I don’t have any relatives…if that’s what you’re asking.” She had light brown hair that trailed down to her chest. Even though she was nineteen she still reminded me of a child. In some ways, she reminded me of Skye.

  “What happened to your father?”

  “Ran out on us when I was born. I’ve never met him.”

  I figured that’s what happened.

  “Mom and I did fine on our own…until she got sick.”

  The doctor made it sound like she wasn’t going to make it. Then Angie really would be alone. “Scarlet and I would like to be there for you as much as we can.”

  “Why?”

  “We’ve already raised our kids and now they’re having their own kids…I guess we need something to do.”

  She continued to look at me like I was crazy.

  “My wife had a difficult childhood. She didn’t have anyone besides her brother, and without that help it’s not clear where she would have ended up. Everyone needs someone, sometimes. Let Scarlet and I be that someone for you.”

  “I still don’t understand why you would help me…”

  “Because you’re too good to be working in a strip club, Angie. You should be in school getting an education. You’ll get nowhere at a joint like that.”

  “I can’t take your money. You’ve done enough.”

  “You will take it,” I said firmly. “I’m also offering you a job.”

  “A job?” she asked.

  “At PIXEL. It’s a filing position and doesn’t pay as much as stripping but it’s still good money. You could afford a decent apartment while you’re in school. In that regard, I wouldn’t be giving you any money.”

  She tucked her hair behind her ear.

  “So, what do you say?”

  “Are you always this nice to people who backstab you?”

  I chuckled. “No. But you’re a kid so it’s different.”

  “I’m not a kid. And you aren’t that old.”

  “I’m older than I look.” And I’ve experienced a lot more than the average person.

  “And I’m old enough to understand the consequences of my actions.”

  “Is there any particular reason why you’re so averse to me helping you?”

  “I don’t want people to feel sorry for me.”

  “Well, I do,” I said frankly. “But that’s not a bad thing. You’re going through a lot and you’re far too young to carry that kind of burden. No one should have to carry that.”

  She stared at her hands in her lap.

  “So, you’ll start your new job tomorrow,” I said. “And when the semester starts again you’ll be a freshman.”

  This time she didn’t argue.

  I started the engine and listened to it come to life. “Where do you live?” I wasn’t going to let her walk home, even if my jacket covered her up.

  She wouldn’t meet my gaze.

  “Angie?” I pressed.

  The silence stretched on.

  I stared at her and waited for a response.

  “I don’t have a place…I’ve been living out of my car.”

  Why hadn’t I anticipated that? “You’ll stay with Scarlet and I until we find you a place.”

  Normally, she would object but this time she didn’t. It was probably because she was desperate, wanting a warm shower and a clean bed to sleep on. They were things I took for granted every single day. “Thank you.” Her voice barely came out as a whisper. Despite it’s acute volume, the emotion was heavy.

  And I think I spotted a tear.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Conrad

  Lexie came over the second she got off of work. “How are you?” She came to the couch and sat beside me, her eyes moving over the bruises on my face. She didn’t need an answer because her face fell in sadness at the redness across my eyes and cheeks.

  “I’m fine. You?”

  “I was distracted all day because I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I’m going to ask for some time off.”

  “Don’t you d
are. I had to bribe your boss just to give you your job back.”

  “I’m so worried…”

  “I can take care of myself. And don’t forget about Apollo.” He was lying beside me on the couch, his head resting on my thigh. “He’s been keeping an eye on me.”

  “I know…but I wish I could stay home and take care of you.” She gently touched my cheek with her fingers, examining the swelling.

  “My mom has stopped by at least twenty times. You should see all the pans of brownies and cookies in the kitchen.”

  “That was nice of her.”

  “Yeah, it was.” I just wish she would stop crying every time she looked at me.

  “You want me to make some dinner?”

  “Sure.” I knew taking care of me was what made her happy.

  “In the mood for anything in particular?”

  “No,” I said. “I like everything you make.”

  She finally smiled. “Okay.” She gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze before she walked into the kitchen.

  “I’m going to take a shower.”

  “You didn’t do that already?”

  “No. I was too lazy.” When I stood up Apollo got off of me.

  “Leave the door unlocked.”

  “So you can sneak a peak?” I teased.

  She rolled her eyes from the kitchen. “Just in case you need help.”

  “Sure…”

  ***

  After I dried off and got dressed I walked into the living room. Lexie was sitting on the couch but she wasn’t alone. Apollo was sitting beside her, his chin resting on her thigh. He sat with her just the way he sat with me.

  Dumbfounded, I just stared. The only time I saw Apollo near Lexie was when he was growling at her.

  Lexie rubbed him between the ears and looked up at me.

  “Looks like you two made up.”

  “After I put the pan in the oven I sat down. Then he jumped on my lap.” She shrugged but there was an obvious smile on her lips. “I think he trusts me now.”

  Apollo eyed us back and forth, like he knew we were talking about him.

  “He should trust you.” I sat on the other couch and expected Apollo to abandon her and come to me.