Guarding Light

by Mckoy, Cate

  In this position she was eye level with his sex. She started to tremble. He looked immense, so impossibly large. Catlyn began to freak. She couldn't allow that near her body.

  Jack saw the abject horror that overtook Catlyn's face as she stared at his penis. "Oh, no, no, sweetheart." Kneeling in front of her, forcing her to make eye contact rather than stare at his sexual organ as though she were about to be assaulted. He cupped her chin, tenderly kissing her cheek, eyelids and lips. He whispered. "Baby, whatever you are thinking right now that is bringing that horrified look to your face just stop."

  "Y-you are really big. I-I don't see how you are going to fit without it hurting really badly."

  Another one of those sad looks came across Jack's face. "Honey, men and women were made to fit together. It's a natural fit. There isn't anything more natural."

  Catlyn looked deeply into his eyes. "My brain knows that, has studied that. I have a PhD in abnormal psych; I really do know this to be a true fact. But my body doesn't know it. I have an irrational fear of being penetrated. The very idea brings back all the pain from that day."

  "Not so irrational. You've survived a woman's worst nightmare with incredible aplomb. And, I penetrated you this afternoon." Jack reminded her, taking her hands in his.

  "Your tongue and fingers penetrated me." She countered.

  Jack decided that he would have to get rid of any embarrassment he may feel talking about Catlyn's body, if they were to get pass this. "When my fingers were inside you, I felt…I guess the best term to use is ridges…I…"

  Mortified, Catlyn tried to pull her hands free of his. He wouldn't allow it. They needed to have all their barriers gone. "Honey, its nothing to be ashamed of, it was something done to you. You were a little girl."

  "I hate that you can feel the scar tissue left by that animal. I hate that I am not normal. I hate that you may not enjoy being with me because of something I can't change." Catlyn seemed inconsolable.

  Jack tightened his hands on hers, wanting her to really listen to him. "Catlyn, that just isn't true. I loved every single moment with you this afternoon when we were making love. You gave me pleasure beyond any I have ever felt."

  She gave a wry smirk. "You pleasured me, not the other way around."

  "That is where you are wrong. Touching your beautiful body was a total pleasure to me. I almost came just from the sounds you were making. Baby, you are pretty hot and sexy in the throes of orgasm." Shyly she bowed her head, liking the words he spoke.

  Jack stood. "Come on, in you go." He moved the sheet further down the bed. Catlyn slid into bed, going towards the middle, leaving room for Jack.

  Jack followed her into bed, piling pillows behind her head. He lay on his side, as she lay on her back. Leaning on his arm, moving in close he threaded his fingers through hers with one hand and threaded his fingers through her hair with the other. "What did you do with your hair? I like all these waves and curls."

  She smiled, savoring their closeness. She knew he was trying to take her mind off his erection currently poking in her side. "Well, I actually didn't do anything to it. This is what my hair looks like when I just let it dry. You've only seen it flat-ironed or blown dry."

  He smiled, taking a closer look. "I like you all naturel. It's sexy and wild."

  Catlyn laughed, caressing his jaw and chin. "So you like the disheveled look, huh?"

  He leaned in and kissed her lips, whispering. "I like your look." He lay down on the pillows, pulling her into his arms so she lay against his chest.

  She went willingly into his arms. It felt so good. It felt normal. Her and Jack lying in bed together felt awesome!

  Jack gave a contented sigh. "So, what do you think about tonight?"

  Catlyn slowly began to stroke his chest from pectoral to waist. "I think I was very lucky to have you there."

  "I almost lost it when I saw him bring you down. But you were doing pretty good for yourself."

  "Uh, my knees and the rest of my body would disagree."

  Jack titled her chin up. "Catlyn, are you in pain?"

  She smiled at his concern. "No sweetheart." At his widen eyes, she clarified. "Well, not anything lasting anyway."

  His smile was slow, it bloomed in long seconds, he whispered. "You called me sweetheart."

  Thinking she may have taken a little too much for granted she said. "You don't like that?" She continued feeling a little more than justified calling him an endearment. "You are always calling me Kitten, baby, sweetheart and honey. I didn't think you would mind."

  He pulled her close, turning them until she lay beneath him. Her hands went automatically around his waist. His arms leaned on the bed beside her head, his hands touching her cheeks. He tapped her nose. "I don't mind. In fact, I liked hearing it from you. I was just surprised you called me that." He teasingly kissed her nose. "I mean, you're so fond of 'chief' in that tone of voice you get."

  She tsked. "I don't get a tone."

  He laughed. "Baby, you get a tone. Trust me. You can freeze the devil in hell with that tone."

  "Ha, ha, very funny." She leaned up and kissed him. He stretched it longer when he felt her about to pull back.

  "Mmm, what was that for?" He smiled down at her, wondering what she was thinking.

  She hesitatingly told him. "I've never had this kind of closeness with anyone before. I didn't think I'd ever be able to." Frowning she explained, "I usually go frigid when a man touches me. So much that I embarrassed myself and made the man feel uncomfortable."

  He stroked her cheek. "You've tried?"

  She nodded. "Over the years I tried about 5 different times with men who asked me out. I'd go on these very stilted dates of just going through the motions. On my very first date after the rape the guy went to kiss me good night and I threw up on him, almost in his mouth." Tears came to her eyes as she remembered. "I was so utterly embarrassed."

  Jack kissed her cheek. "I am so sorry, Catlyn."

  She looked at him. "Why? It wasn't your fault."

  He probed her eyes. "But you thought I had something to do with it, didn't you?"

  Enjoying the closeness and sharing she was experiencing with Jack, she told the unvarnished truth. "I hated you back then. The pain you caused me that day in the hospital was so much greater than my physical pain." Jack wiped the tears off her cheeks. "First I wanted to kill you and then I wanted to die."

  "Aww, baby, if only I'd known about…" Jack stopped abruptly, closing his eyes. When she touched his face, he opened his eyes and continued with a roughened voice. "…If I had known about the screwed up timeline I would have gone after that bastard."

  Giving him a watery smile she said. "I know that now."

  He kissed her lips, whispering against them, "Do you truly know it Kitten?"

  She took in his exhaled breath, accepting him fully and whispered back. "Yes, I know it, to my very core."

  Jack groaned and took her mouth urgently. For several long minutes nothing could be heard in the mood-lit bedroom, but sighs, moans and groans, both female and male.

  Catlyn felt his erection pushing against her mound. Jack rotated his pelvis seeking closer contact. She wanted to pleasure him like he had done her, wanted him to know how much what he had done meant to her. She also wanted to know his body as well as he knew hers.

  Parting from Jack's kisses, her hand left the caressing of his back to glide to his hips, where she pushed gently until he pulled back enough so that she could hesitatingly cup his shaft through his boxers.

  He gave a grunt. "Kitten, that's a dangerous place for your hand if we aren't having sex tonight." He took a hold of her hand to pull it away from his body.

  Catlyn kept her hold on his shaft and started to stroke him. She smiled softly into his half-closed eyes while he sucked air through his teeth. "Let me take care of this for you, sweetheart." She gave his penis a squeeze.

  "Ah, baby, you don't have to. I understand and will wait until you're ready." Catlyn could see the strain on his fa
ce and hear it in his voice as he tried to control his body.

  She kissed him hungrily. "I want you in this way. I want to show you how much you please me, how much your body turns mine to jelly."

  She could see the indecision as well as his eagerness, arching a brow he questioned, "Catlyn, are you sure?"

  "Oh, yes, Jack, very sure." She pushed against his chest until he lay back. "You have an incredible body, Jack."

  He smiled, putting his hands at her waist as she put her leg over him to reach the floor. "Right back at ya babe." When she stood he caught her hand. "Hey, where are you going?"

  She gave him a sexy tilt of her lips for an answer, holding up a finger. She went to her duffle and removed her cuffs and came back to the bed.

  He looked in her eyes and then at the cuffs. "Uh, what are you going to do with those?"

  She stared at him. "Trust me?"

  Holding her gaze he gave her his wrists. "Completely," He whispered.

  Leaning over, she rewarded him with a kiss then she quickly clicked the cuffs on one of his wrists. She put his hands above his head, cuffing him to the headboard, putting the key on the table. "Now no moving just lay back and hopefully enjoy."

  Looking deeply into her eyes he said, "Oh, I have no doubts that whatever you do I will enjoy myself."

  Nervously she crossed her arms, gripping either side of the sexy nightgown, then with one speedy motion she pulled it over her head, tossing it to the floor.

  Jack's eyes blazed, nostrils flared, boner breaching his boxers by a few inches. He licked his lips and said in a hoarse whisper. "Kitten, you're so gorgeous." Eyes traveling down her body he added, "Sure I can't move?"

  She shook her head and waged her finger at him. "Uh uh. Just let me take control. None of your alpha-male warp-factor five stuff!"

  He nodded his understanding while staring at her nipples. "I love your nipples, so dark chocolaty brown. Mmm, and I love how big they get when I suck them."

  And with those words said in his deep voice Catlyn's nipples grew hard and pebbled. She put a hand over each nipple, trying to stop their reacting. "Hey, I said none of the alpha-male crap. You keep quiet mister."

  Jack laughed, flicking out his tongue. "Just a taste, baby?"

  She tightly gripped his dick, squeezing and massaging. "I said quiet!" Her voice held command.

  Jack gasped, arching off the bed, pushing his hard-on into her hand. "O-ok, Kitten. You have control." Seeing her satisfied smile, in that moment, Jack knew that control is what Catlyn wanted when it came to sex, with clarity he understood why it was she didn't drink. She wanted to always be in control of her faculties. He would give her the control she craved. He would give her what was stolen from her 25 years ago.

  "Lift up more." Again it was a command. Jack raised his hips from the bed so that she could remove his boxers. His erection sprang free, bumping his stomach before standing at attention, saluting Catlyn and weeping pre-cum.

  Swallowing hard and watching her through half-closed eyes, he silently willed her to take what she wanted and needed from him. He would gladly do whatever it was she needed to feel normal, restored. Silently he cheered her on: Come on baby, you can do it. Take me.

  She leaned over him, carefully straddling him. She gripped his wrists just below the cuffs, kissing him first on his hairline, temple and ear. Her hands caressed towards his shoulders. She outlined his tattoo on his right arm, tracing the eagle's spread wings and the crossed daggers below the eagle's feet.

  "You are a Marine." She traced the Latin words with a fingernail 'Semper Fidelis'. Before Jack could speak she took his mouth hungrily. Catlyn greedily applied all the technique Jack had shown her and some she felt for herself.

  Her hands slid down his arms as her body inched down his, the heat from his scorching her. She licked and kissed her way to his nipples, where she then tease and plucked them to tiny hard points. Jack gasped and his pelvis came off the bed, lifting Catlyn as he writhed in pleasure.

  Catlyn felt his pre-cum mark her belly and then chest as she inched even lower. She tasted and caressed his ribs and then his fantastic abs, her tongue circling his navel before dipping inside. His cocked bumped her chin as she began to lick the fine line of hair leading to the base of his shaft.

  Jack's legs automatically opened, accommodating Catlyn as she gripped his shaft with both hands.

  Jack watched her between his legs, very close to release. She held his dick, staring at it, as though unsure what to do. Taking pity on her he whispered in a gravelly voice, "Its ok baby, we can stop right now." He would die of blue balls if they stopped. But, Catlyn being comfortable with him was more important than him getting off. Worst case scenario he could always go into the bathroom and take matters in his own hands.

  She glanced up from her study of his penis. "You're huge. My fingers barely touch around you and I have both my hands on your dick, piled one on top of the other and it still goes pass my hands by several inches."

  She watched his cock with a combination of awe and trepidation. Feeling slightly embarrassed, Jack offered again. "Honey, we can stop right now. This doesn't have to happen tonight."

  For an answer she glanced into his eyes before squeezing his cock with both hands and then her tongue circled the head as she had circled his tongue when they kissed.

  Jack moaned, thrusting upward, unable to stop. Catlyn then began a series of little nibbles and hot licks around his head before she slowly began to suck it into her mouth. She used just the right amount of suction, driving him crazy. His thrusting became constant as she removed one of her hands to start playing with his sac as the other began to slide up and down on the part of his cock that wouldn't fit into her mouth. She filled her mouth with his inches, sucking hard.

  Her untutored blow job was by far more exciting than any Jack had ever experienced. She sucked at him with vigor trying to take him all in even though it wasn't possible and when she started to stroke in time with her sucking Jack knew he wasn't going to last. He felt the pressure in his balls build. And when Catlyn began to hum as though she were eating her favorite dessert, Jack had to warn her of his impending release.

  "Kitten, I-I don't think I can last much longer, ah, ah." When she ignored him and her hand sped up and she added a twist to her downward stroke and her head bobbed up and down faster he tried warning her again. "Ooooh, baby, I can't c-can't hold on. I am gonna come!"

  She ignored him again, gently squeezed his sac as she continued. Jack was beyond words as the heat of her mouth, the twisting stroke of her hand and the squeeze to his balls grew to be too much pleasure for his system. He exploded and started coming in hot spurts. Catlyn continued to suck and stroke him extending his pleasure, catching his come in her mouth. She swallowed his essence, milking him to the last drop. Jack trembled as he watched her lick up the come that had escaped her mouth, licking along his shaft from top to bottom until it was all gone.

  His cock twitched as she slowly released it and looked up at him. She reached over to the nightstand for the cuff keys. Leaning over him, her breast at his eye-level, she removed the cuffs, placing them and the key on the night table. Wide-eyed she stared at him then shyly asked. "Did I do it ok?"

  Completely thrown, he quickly took her into his arms. She went from between his legs to his side. He pulled her against his chest as he kissed her. He kissed her breathless before releasing her and looking at her. "Baby, you were incredible. I loved it."

  "You taste salty, tangy and like soap. I like it."

  Again with the blushing, "Kitten, don't say that."

  She glanced at him in confusion. "Why?"

  "Baby, you tell a guy you love the taste of his come he is going to want to fuck your mouth every chance he gets. It drives him crazy when a woman he really cares about swallows. And let me tell you, having you say you like the taste of my come has all kinds of fantasies going through my mind."

  "Should I not have swallowed?"

  Her confusion and innocence were adora
ble. "Well, first off, why did you swallow?"

  "I wanted to taste all of you, see if you were as good as your mouth taste."

  Jack couldn't hold back his blush it was ridiculous that his inexperienced partner could bring about a blush so quickly. "Uh, then you should swallow anytime it pleases you. God knows you won't get an argument from me."

  Shamefaced he tilted her chin. "I should have told you this before you swallowed. I want you to know that I am safe. I get checked annually. I've never had any problems. I have always used protection. My last checkup I got a clean bill of health." He hesitated a moment before continuing. "I know I am safe with you but you can still get pregnant, right?"